Survivors Series (Book 2): Heroes Never Die
Page 34
“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.”
“Only kind I ever have.”
We walked back hand in hand to the store. We found a comfortable place to sit at the back and continued our writing. She was resting her head on my chest, my arm around her with my hand resting gently on her still flat stomach, and speaking softly. “Ok then,” I said turning to a fresh page of the notebook, “What happened next?”
“Next was when you and I started training together.”
“Oh yeah. As I recall your hands got a few slaps that day.”
“Just a few,” she smiled.
I chuckled and began writing, listening to the calming sound of her voice. I may have had a deadly virus coursing through my veins, infecting and replicating as we sat there talking, but I had no reason to panic. They were safe for another day, I was going to be a dad, and life would go on. I can’t say that I was completely calm, there were moments when anger got the better of me. I had to stop writing, I had to get up and walk. There were times when the rage was so strong I punched the store wall with all my strength, which wasn’t much near the end.
Chapter 27
So now you know the truth, I lied to you from the very beginning. Actually, I guess I never really lied to you. Up until now, I have survived, I just won’t for much longer. As I’ve sat here writing this, it has given me the greatest opportunity to really go over my life. It has given me a chance to know what I have done, what I could have done better and what I did best. And do you know what? Looking back there’s only one thing I would have changed, only one thing I regret. I regret that I waited so damn long to find the girl of my dreams.
I’ve spent most of my remaining hours with Sarah. She sat with me and helped me remember what happened since the beginning. She corrected me and argued with me and even slapped me a few times when I got a little too… detailed about us but I decided that it was important to write down. If a stranger is going to read this, then they might as well know as much about me as they can. You can decide whether I was a good man or not but ultimately it doesn’t matter because I know I did what I had to do to keep those I loved safe. And hey, I’m dead so what does it matter right? Sarah stayed with me as long as she could, she even fell asleep in my arms as I continued to write. She stayed until it started getting dark and I told her she needed to go home because I didn’t want her to be out at night. She was angry that I was sending her away, but she didn’t argue. She knew like I did that this would be the last time we saw each other. I made her promise not to come back to this store, I didn’t want her to remember me as anything less than happy to be with her. I wanted her last memory of me to be the smile I had on my face and the acceptance I had in my eyes. I loved her like no one else on the planet, and I gave my life to keep her safe. My only regret is that I had but one life to give for her.
I don’t know how much there’s left to say. I’ll take a quick second to write about the Walkers as if I haven’t already. I think it was a virus. I don’t know how it came to be, and I don’t know where it came from, but the way it spreads would suggest it could be nothing else. The purpose of a virus is to infect, replicate and spread and what a better way to spread than to turn your host into a single-minded killing machine? The Walkers are simple. They have one purpose that they dedicate their unnatural life to. We were scared of the Walkers at first. When it all started, I was terrified even if I didn’t show it, but once I understood them, understood how to kill them they became an obstacle rather than a supernatural force. People are always most scared of what they can’t understand. I understand Walkers, I understand death, and I refuse to be afraid. Make me a promise my dear reader, after you are done reading this can you please do two things. Can you please make sure this gets to Sarah? Light a few tires on fire and wait for her or one of the others. They’ll come. I can ask this of you without fear for their safety because if you’ve read this far, you know that they’re smart and that they can handle themselves, so don’t try anything. The second thing I want you to do is to take my gun. Take it and use it to survive and protect as many people as you can. If you can’t or won’t take it and use it as instructed, please give it back to my brother whenever you deliver this journal.
I don’t think I have much more to write and nothing more to tell you. My hands are beginning to shake, and I feel like my skin is on fire. My leg went numb hours ago, and my vision is beginning to blur. It’s getting harder to breathe, and I don’t know how much longer I will be able to hold onto my life, let alone my humanity.
Here are my last words. I have done things in my life that I’m sure I should regret. I’ve done things that were dumb but that were necessary. I’ve done things that some might call heroic, but I’m no hero. I’m not braver than any of my friends, and that’s the ultimate truth. I may not be a hero, but I had the privilege to live with and fight beside those I would call heroes. I’ve seen my friends know their limits, reach them and then, through sheer force of will, overcome them. I believe that a hero is waiting inside each of us and all we have to do is have the courage to let it out. I’ve seen my friends become heroes and I’m glad I lived long enough to see it.
I have one last thing to ask of you, my friend. I say, friend, because though I may not know you, you most certainly know me. Kill them all, kill every single Walker. I don’t care how many bullets it takes or how long. I want you to help forge a future for my son or daughter. Start over and do better this time. Make sure nothing like this ever happens again, please.
Goodbye,
James Ryan