To Believe

by Laura Scott

  As if sensing her discomfort, Jeremy lowered his head to speak into her ear. “What do you say to taking our order to go? It’s pretty loud in here.”

  “I’d like that. We can go back to my place,” she agreed.

  “You still like your pizza with the works?”

  “Absolutely.”

  He grinned and stepped up to take his place in line. She stayed back to give others more room.

  She cast her gaze over the restaurant patrons with a practiced eye, trained to constantly be on the lookout for any potential threat. She caught a glimpse of Alex seated in a booth across from someone she didn’t recognize, but there was no sign of Nathan Beck.

  Was he some sort of vampire who only came out at night? The image made her smile.

  Then her smile faded as she realized exactly what she needed to do. She couldn’t work alongside Nate. No, what she needed to do was to take some time off work and secretly follow him.

  Turning the idea over in her mind, she nodded to herself. It was the best way she could think of to catch Beck in the act of doing something illegal.

  She’d have to pretend to be sick, something she didn’t normally like to do. But she knew Beck was working tonight and tomorrow night but was off Tuesday. One sick day wouldn’t be the end of the world. Besides, she was technically still on the concussion protocol, right?

  Jeremy came over holding a large box of pizza. “Ready?”

  “Yes.” She opened the door and let out a sigh of relief when it closed behind them, cutting the noise level in half.

  “Something wrong?” Jeremy asked.

  “Huh? Oh, no. I’m fine. Better now, it was really loud in there.”

  “Crazy busy.” He sniffed and wiggled his eyebrows. “I hope this pizza tastes as good as it smells.”

  “It will,” she assured him. “Gino hasn’t lost his touch.”

  The walk back to her apartment seemed short, and soon they were sitting on her sofa in the living room with plates of pizza loaded with the works and soft drinks.

  “You’re right.” Jeremy paused between bites. “Gino still has the secret recipe.”

  She nodded, embarrassed to be so hungry considering how her shift had ended with Eden’s murder. Then again, her job was far from glamorous.

  “I have an idea I’d like to run past you,” Jeremy said when they’d finished their meal.

  She took a sip of her root beer. “What kind of idea?”

  He stood and carried their empty plates to the kitchen, before taking the seat beside her. He sat sideways so he was facing her.

  “Garth mentioned that the Clark County Medical Examiner, Dr. Chris Patton, is planning to retire in a couple of years.”

  She frowned and shrugged. “Not surprising, he seems to have some trouble getting around. I heard he likes to play golf but has recently cut back on that, too. But what does Patton’s plan have to do with you?”

  “I was thinking of applying for a pathology fellowship position in Lansing.” He looked at her expectantly.

  “Okay.” She didn’t get where he was going with this.

  “In the State of Michigan, you have to be a graduate from a pathology fellowship program to become a medical examiner.”

  Realization dawned. “You want to become a medical examiner?”

  Jeremy’s eyes lit up. “Yeah, I think I do. I miss being a surgeon, and I know I can’t go back to that, but I don’t love what I’m doing now. Even with my recent promotion, I’m not sure I’ll be happy. When Garth mentioned the current Clark County ME was going to retire in a few years, I realized this might be the best way to keep at least part of the career I loved. Not to mention, a career opportunity that happens to be near you.”

  “Me?” The last part caught her off guard. “You want to relocate here?”

  “Yeah, I do.” Jeremy reached out to take her hand. “I’m falling for you, Trina.”

  She gaped at him. “But—we barely know each other.”

  “I know enough that I don’t want to let you go.” The disappointment in his eyes made her feel guilty. “Just think about it, okay? Give me, give us, a chance.”

  Trina wasn’t sure what to say. Her heart wanted to shout with joy, but her very logical brain warned her that he might not realize what he was getting into.

  Most men quickly figured out that her mission was more important than anything else.

  It was her life.

  12

  This wasn’t going the way he’d planned.

  Jeremy tried to hide his disappointment but sensed he’d failed. The myriad of emotions playing across Trina’s features created a sick feeling in his gut.

  But he refused to give up.

  “Trina?” He stroked his thumb over the back of her hand, enjoying the silky softness. “I’m only asking for a chance, not a lifelong commitment.” Although, he couldn’t deny hoping for just that. Which was surprising, since he and Jake had been the confirmed bachelors of the McNally family for a while now. Determined not to fall in love the way their younger siblings had.

  Did McNally Bay have a love spell cast around it, or what?

  “You’re asking too much.” She gently tugged her hand from his and shot to her feet. Her gaze darted around the apartment, avoiding his. “Jeremy, you need to know I care about you, too. A lot. But I don’t think you should rearrange your career, your entire life, around me.”

  He stood, trying to understand what she wasn’t saying. “Because you don’t feel the same way.”

  “No. Yes.” She blew out a loud sigh and finally met his gaze. “I do care about you, more than anyone I’ve gone out with in a long time. You’re special, but I can’t afford to be distracted from my goal of eliminating those responsible for cooking and selling crystal meth.”

  She still wasn’t making much sense. “I understand this is an important part of your job, Trina. I’d never ask you to relocate. But I’d like to continue seeing you while I pursue the pathology fellowship program. I’m convinced we can find a way to make this work.”

  “It’s more than my job,” she insisted. “I won’t rest until I’ve uncovered the source of the drugs, even if that means working on this in every moment of my spare time.” She glanced at her watch. “Starting tonight.”

  “What do you mean, starting tonight?” Now he really didn’t like where this was going. “I thought you were scheduled to work day shift tomorrow?”

  Her gaze sharpened. “How do you know when I’m scheduled to work?”

  Busted. He hid a wince and waved a hand, trying to make light of it. “I asked Garth if he was taking off this week, but he mentioned working with you in the morning.”

  “Well, I’m not sure if I’m working.” Trina tunneled her fingers through her hair, betraying her frustration. “Don’t you see? This is how I am, Jeremy. Single-minded and determined. I’ll do whatever is necessary to find out who is behind the meth dealing. It’s also one of the main reasons I wanted a K-9 partner. Between getting approval for a K-9 program and my determination to get rid of the meth lab, I don’t have time for anything else. Even you.”

  “I see.” In other words, she wasn’t going to make time for a relationship with him. It wasn’t what he wanted to hear, but he understood her desire to eliminate the very drug that caused Steve’s death. Hadn’t he felt the same way about alcoholics after his crash? He’d carried a deep resentment for a long time.

  But somehow, the thought of a new career had lessened some of that previous anger.

  “I’m sorry.” Her voice was soft and contrite. “I wish I could be the woman you want me to be, but I can’t. This is my calling.”

  He tried to take heart in knowing that she considered him a distraction. “I thought you didn’t have anything to go on? Or did the black truck give you something?”

  Her gaze skittered from his. “It gave me an idea, one I need to investigate more fully.”

  Why was it so important to her to start her investigation tonight? It was already nine th
irty, pretty late to head out searching for clues. “Great idea. I can help. Steve was my friend, too.”

  She was shaking her head before he’d finished speaking. “I appreciate that, but you’re a doctor not a cop. This is my risk to take.”

  The stubborn streak he once considered cute was now super annoying. “I don’t mind taking the risk with you.”

  “I’m sorry,” she repeated. “Thanks for dinner, but I need to get ready.”

  For what? He didn’t voice the question, knowing she wouldn’t answer. He still didn’t understand why it was so critical for her jump on this tonight, it seemed last minute especially considering she was originally scheduled to work in the morning.

  Then it hit him. The deputy, Nathan Beck, worked night shift. And it was entirely possible the guy was scheduled to work tonight.

  “It’s Beck, isn’t it? He’s your suspect because he owns a black truck.”

  The flash of surprise in her eyes was all he needed to confirm his guess. “I never said that.”

  “You didn’t have to.” It wasn’t easy to hide the flash of panic. “You can’t do this alone; he’s a cop and twice your size. Do me a favor and arrange for backup.”

  “I can call for backup if needed. There are always two cops on duty.”

  Which only left one as a potential backup. She was like a broken record, and he had to squelch his temper. “You really think Beck is involved? No other black trucks came back from your search?”

  “Technically, Beck’s brother owns the black truck, not Beck himself. And I did follow up on one other possibility,” she admitted. “I forgot to mention this earlier, but I discovered the names of the four teens who were on the boat the night Lucy died.”

  “Really? Who were they?”

  “Your dad, my uncle Samuel Delrosa, a man named Benny Maynard, and another guy named Abe Crowley.”

  His heart thudded in his chest as he digested the information. Ironic that his dad and Trina’s uncle were friends back then. “That’s great news.”

  “Wait,” she held up a hand. “Don’t get too excited, my uncle Sam died about twelve years ago, so there’s only two of the four left, Benny and Abe. Abe wasn’t really in the mood to talk, just kept insisting that he wasn’t the one who hit Lucy.”

  “At least we know that someone hit her; it’s exactly what my sisters believed all along. Leon Tate believed it, too.” He really needed to get his hands on the autopsy report first thing in the morning.

  “Yes, but the knowledge isn’t much help. They can both blame the two dead men for whatever happened that night, leaving us no way to prove otherwise.” She spread her hands. “It’s a dead end. Game over.”

  “I see.” He frowned, knowing her logic made sense. He didn’t want the investigation on what had happened that night to continue to linger, especially since that meant his father was guilty by default.

  No, he and his siblings needed to try talking to both men. It was possible one of them might cave under the pressure.

  Carrying a secret of this magnitude could wear you down over the years. And if these two men both still lived in the area, they had to see Leon Tate and his daughter Mary often enough to add an additional layer of guilt.

  He’d heard a few deathbed confessions in his career from people who knew there were going to die and wanted to get something off their conscience.

  Guilt was a heavy burden. And he felt certain that one of the two men, Abe Crowley or Benny Maynard, would eventually break down and talk.

  But that was something he could do tomorrow, after obtaining a copy of Lucy’s autopsy. If they’d even give it to him.

  “Thanks again for dinner.” Trina’s tone was polite yet distant. “Drive safe on your trip back to Lansing.”

  Since it was clear she wanted him to leave, he rose and headed for the door. “I’m not driving back until Tuesday, so if you need something tonight, don’t hesitate to call.” He glanced at her over his shoulder. “I mean it, Trina. Better to call than end up hurt again.”

  “Thanks, but I’ll be fine.” She followed him to the doorway.

  He wanted to pull her into his arms for a kiss, but the way she stood there, with her arms crossed protectively across her chest, nixed that idea. He tried one last time to convince her to take precautions. “Please be careful.”

  “I will.” She tipped her head to the side, regarding him thoughtfully. “I wish you had more faith in my ability.”

  “I have plenty of faith in you, Trina. I just don’t trust Beck. The guy is a real jerk.”

  “I can handle him.” Her confidence didn’t waver.

  He sincerely hoped so and offered a crooked smile. “Take care of yourself, Trina.”

  “I will. You, too, Jeremy.”

  He let himself out and softly closed the door behind him. Walking away was difficult, it felt like he was leaving a piece of himself behind. Yet he didn’t have a choice. Trina had made her decision.

  And it didn’t include him.

  For a moment, he toyed with the idea of following her while she followed Beck but quickly dismissed it. She was right about the fact that he wasn’t a cop.

  She was, and he had to trust that she could handle herself even against an arrogant bully like Beck.

  The McNally B&B was quiet when he returned home. The lights in the garage apartment indicated Jemma and Garth were still up, but he didn’t want to intrude. The Stevenson house was dark, and there was no sign of Brianna and Jake either.

  He made his way through the dining room and walked outside to the gazebo. A full moon shimmered above the lake, making him wish Trina was here to share the view with him.

  Maybe she was right about one thing. Any decision he made about his career had to be for him, alone. Not for her, not for his siblings, but for him.

  Knowing that Trina didn’t want to explore the possibility of a relationship didn’t change his mind about considering the idea of becoming a medical examiner.

  But he thought it might be a good idea to talk to one firsthand about what the job entailed. Maybe even Dr. Chris Patton himself.

  Besides, he’d need something important to occupy his mind now that Trina had sent him away.

  His heart squeezed in his chest. He knew getting over Trina wouldn’t be as easy as getting over Phoebe.

  Trina rested her forehead on her apartment door for a long time, resisting the urge to chase after Jeremy and beg him not to go.

  Logically, she knew it was better this way, but that didn’t make letting him go any easier. She’d had to cross her arms to keep from reaching out to him. From throwing herself into his embrace.

  Enough. She finally pushed away from the door and turned toward her bedroom. She needed to get a grip. She had work to do.

  Trying to nap for a few hours, since Beck’s shift didn’t start until midnight, was useless. Between letting Jeremy walk away and her plan to find evidence against Beck, her brain refused to shut down.

  When it was time to go, she debated whether or not to wear her uniform. She wanted the reassurance of having her weapon and other tools at her disposal, yet Donnelly had a rule against wearing your uniform while off duty.

  In the end, she decided against it. She wore black jeans and black T-shirt, pulling a baseball cap over her red hair, pulling her ponytail through the opening in the back. Then she added her shoulder harness. She holstered her weapon and added the taser and a set handcuffs to her belt as an extra measure. If she was stopped, she would claim she was out looking for the meth trailer on her own time, which wasn’t far from the truth.

  Sheriff Donnelly knew about her brother’s drug overdose and subsequent death. He’d warned her about getting too emotionally involved but had never outright forbidden her to investigate the drug dealing on her off hours.

  Not that he’d appreciate her plan of tailing Nathan Beck.

  She parked her squad amidst the others in the lot in front of headquarters. It occurred to her that she should have asked Jeremy to borrow hi
s car, rather than using the squad, but decided it was too late.

  Besides, using the squad offered a sense of anonymity. Any one of the deputies could be behind the wheel, and in the darkness with the brim of her hat pulled down over her brow, she felt certain she could keep a low profile.

  It didn’t take long for Beck to head back outside to his squad. He hiked his belt before sliding behind the wheel.

  She waited for him to turn toward town before easing the car in gear and following.

  He cruised Main Street but didn’t stay long. Her pulse kicked up a notch when she noticed he was heading toward the highway. And when he turned west, she felt certain he was going straight to the Pine Cone Campground.

  She tightened her grip on the steering wheel. This could be it. It was early in his shift, but maybe this was his normal pattern during the graveyard shift. She’d worked a few of them and by four in the morning had found it extremely difficult to stay awake.

  Beck’s brake lights flashed as he slowed down enough to turn into the campground. She gave him a head start, then did the same. She was nervous that he’d notice her squad and wonder why the second deputy on duty would be patrolling the same area he was.

  Yet it soon became clear that Beck was just doing a quick drive through. He left the campground less than five minutes after going in. In fact, he hadn’t even bothered with a full patrol of the area.

  Lazy as well as being a jerk.

  Taking note of the direction he was heading, she waited for a few minutes to go past before following. Seeing a pair of taillights up ahead, she quickly closed the gap between them.

  Less than five miles later, Beck turned onto a narrow dirt road and stopped. Afraid he’d noticed her tailing him, she drove past and went another mile or so before turning around and pulling off on the side of the highway.

  Drumming her fingers on the steering wheel, she considered her next move. If she drove past him again, he’d likely notice the lights on top of the squad.

  Yet she couldn’t help wondering if the trailer was parked back there. He could easily be checking in with the meth lab before heading out for another patrol of the area.