Pillar of Light

by Gerald N. Lund

  Around the campfires and supper tables, the talk was subdued and solemn. Families assessed what this new development meant for them. Who would volunteer? How would they get on without husbands and fathers? What did this mean for the future? Would they have to fight? They were somber questions and carried no easy answers.

  For the Steeds, the main question of who would volunteer was easier. In their previous family council they had determined who would go in the vanguard company. Now they simply transferred that decision to who would go with the army. As Brigham came down from the stand and began signing up volunteers, the men of the Steed family got into line. Ten minutes later Nathan, Joshua, and Matthew had added their names to the list. Derek would stay behind with Solomon, once he and Jessica arrived from Mount Pisgah.

  Now, around the campfire, they talked quietly about what this would mean. Lydia and Caroline and Jenny were especially quiet. They did not question the decision, but its impact was now all too terribly real. The vanguard company was bad enough, but now there was the possibility of war as well.

  During a lull, Jenny raised her head. “I’m going to volunteer as a laundress and go with you.”

  Matthew jerked up as if he had been slapped. “What?”

  “The letter said that each company could have four laundresses. I will be one of them.”

  “You’re not serious!” Matthew’s face had actually paled at the thought.

  “I am most serious, Matthew. If you have to go, then the children and I shall go with you.”

  Mary Ann watched her youngest and his wife stare at each other—he in shock, she in determination.

  “The letter also said that it will be a march of a thousand miles, Jenny,” Matthew pointed out. “Betsy Jo is only four and little Emmeline is but fifteen months.”

  Her head was up and there was a touch of fire in her green Irish eyes. “And how far will I have to march with my children next spring? A thousand miles? It’s not like this is our permanent home, remember. If I have to go a thousand miles one way or the other, I’ll choose going with you.”

  “She’s right, Matthew,” Rebecca spoke up. “Let her go with you.”

  Now it was Derek’s turn to be shocked. “Rebecca, this is between Matthew and Jenny.”

  She tossed her head, the dark hair bouncing. “No, this is a family council. We all have a right to say what we think.”

  “That’s right,” Nathan said. He too was still reeling a little from Jenny’s proposal, but Rebecca was correct in calling for her voice to be heard.

  Matthew was glaring at Rebecca. She didn’t flinch. “Why not, Matthew? Why shouldn’t Jenny go with you?”

  He was shaking his head, his mouth set. “Because this is going to be a very difficult march. Going with an army is not the same as traveling with a wagon company.”

  “Then why do they allow laundresses to go?” Jenny shot back.

  “I . . .” He shook his head again, at a loss for an answer to that. “No, Jenny. Just get it out of your head. It is not—” He stopped again, but this time it wasn’t because he didn’t know what to say. A figure had stepped quietly into the edge of the firelight, just behind Nathan and his mother. Matthew leaned forward, gaping. “Jessica?”

  Luke’s head snapped up; then his mouth dropped open. “Mama?”

  Now a second figure joined the first and they both came into the full light. It was Solomon and Jessica Garrett, looking tired but smiling broadly. There were gasps, then cries of joy. Rachel shot to her feet. “Mama! Papa!”

  Jessica opened her arms, and her daughter flew around the fire and threw herself into them. Luke came right behind her, nearly knocking them both down as he joined his sister.

  Now they were all up and swarming around the new arrivals. Joshua grabbed Solomon’s hand and pumped it vigorously. “Solomon, what a surprise! When did you get here?”

  Jessica let go of her children and stepped forward to face Joshua. “And what is this we hear about you?” she said, her voice suddenly soft with emotion. “Can it really be?”

  Embarrassed, Joshua dropped his head. “It’s true. Can you believe it?”

  She reached out and touched his arm. “Yes, I can.”

  Suddenly he swept her up and pulled her close to him. “Oh, Jessie, if only I could have done this years ago. I hurt you so much.”

  She held him tightly in return, tears glistening in her eyes. “It has all worked out for the best, Joshua, and we are so happy for you and Caroline. So happy.”

  “Thank you.”

  As they parted again, Nathan clapped Solomon on the shoulder. “Where’s your wagon?”

  “About a mile from here. We weren’t sure where you were.”

  “Then let’s go get it,” Derek exclaimed. “There are going to be some very happy cousins tonight.”

  “Oh, by the way,” Solomon remembered, “I have a message for you, Nathan. I brought some letters for President Young. When I delivered them, he asked me to tell you that he’d like to see you first thing in the morning.”

  Again?Nathan’s face showed his surprise. But then he nodded. “All right.”

  “They’re going to start ferrying across the river in the morning.”

  He nodded again, still puzzled. “I’ll go down first thing.”

  Chapter Notes

  When Captain Allen arrived in Mount Pisgah on 26 June with the request for volunteers, Wilford Woodruff sent him on to Council Bluffs. He also sent Thomas Grover ahead with word of what was happening. Thus when Allen arrived at the bluffs on 30 June, Brigham Young was already aware of what was happening and had met in council with the Twelve and decided it was best to accept the invitation. He met with the army officers at ten o’clock the next morning and immediately called for a meeting of the brethren to formally support the initiative.

  Some of the reasons given here by Brigham Young for accepting the invitation for volunteers were given that day. Other reasons, expounded later, are also given here to help readers understand why President Young so quickly saw the advantage to the Saints in the U.S. president’s offer. Immediately after the meeting, President Young said, he “walked out as recruiting Sergeant” and “took several names as volunteers.” (See MHBY,pp. 202–6; Larry C. Porter, “Interrupted Exodus: Enlisting the Mormon Battalion as Iowa Volunteers,” in Susan Easton Black and William G. Hartley, eds., The Iowa Mormon Trail: Legacy of Faith and Courage[Orem, Utah: Helix Publishing, 1997], pp. 141–42.)

  Chapter 8

  Nathan left before breakfast, taking one of the horses down the bluffs. He reached the ferry site a little before half past seven. Wagons were already lined up for several hundred yards along the road, and he searched them carefully as he passed to see if President Young was in the line. He was not.

  When he reached the ferry he reined in for a moment to watch. The flat-bottomed ferryboat was already halfway across the river, carrying its load of two wagons and teams and the families to whom they belonged. The spot they had chosen was not the narrowest spot on the swift-moving river, but the ground on both sides was mostly level and provided a staging ground for those waiting to load and those on the other side who were unloading. Ramps had been dug on both banks to allow the wagons to drive on and off the ferry easily. A heavy rope, made in their own ropewalk a few days before, angled across to the opposite landing located some distance downstream. This allowed the current to help move the loads across. Another rope angled across upstream. Nathan didn’t have to ask what that was for. Even unloaded, the ferry was too heavy to buck the current and come back the same way it had gone across. So once it was unloaded, oxen would haul the flat-bottomed boat upstream to a point about a hundred yards above where he now sat. Launching it from there allowed the current to help carry the ferry back to its original launch site.

  As he watched, the ferry bulled its way, with the help of several men, into the opposite bank, and immediately the front end was lowered and the wagons began to roll off. It was satisfying to see it working, and once ag
ain Nathan was amazed at Brigham’s foresight and practicality. He looked around and saw Bishop George Miller, who had been put in charge of constructing a ferry and getting it operating. He leaned forward on his horse. “Bishop Miller.”

  The bishop was peering intently across the river, watching the unloading activities on the other side. He turned, and then, recognizing Nathan, waved.

  “Has President Young gone across yet?”

  There was a shake of his head. “No. We’ve taken some of his wagons across, but he’s still at his camp.”

  “And where is that? I’m requested to have a meeting with him this morning.”

  Miller pointed toward a stand of cottonwoods a few rods away. “He’s camped just beyond that grove,” he called.

  Nathan waved and reined his horse around.

  “Thank you for coming. I was pleased to learn that Solomon and Jessica have returned.”

  “Yes. It was a pleasant surprise to see them.”

  “Are they settled in at your camp, then?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good. I know that you have much to do, so I appreciate your taking time to come see me this morning. I’m going to try to get my family across the river; then we’ve decided that Brother Heber, Brother Willard, and myself are going to go back to Mount Pisgah to talk with the Saints about volunteering for the battalion.”

  “Oh?” Now, that said something about how President Young felt about this latest opportunity. Or, he corrected himself, it may be that it said something about how well President Young understood the misgivings this call had created among the Latter-day Saints. “Is there anything I can do to help, President?”

  He motioned to a stool. Then, as Nathan sank down onto it, Brigham leaned back, pulling at his lip thoughtfully. Finally, he leaned forward again. “I appreciate you and the others being among the first to volunteer yesterday, Nathan.”

  He shrugged and explained how they had already decided in a family council who would go west. “That made it easy,” he concluded.

  “I see.” Again he was lost in thought for a moment, then seemed to make up his mind. “Nathan?”

  “Yes, Brother Brigham?”

  “In most cases I’m not inclined to interfere with an individual’s decision or with that of a family.” He frowned, his brows furrowing deeply. “But . . .”

  When he didn’t go on, Nathan finally couldn’t stand it. “Yes, President?”

  He let out his breath in a long sigh of weariness and frustration. “The coming of the army changes everything, Nathan. Everything.”

  Nathan waited as the Apostle sorted through what he wanted to say. “We are losing five hundred men, the very ones we would send with a vanguard company. Don’t get me wrong. It’s a good thing. There’s no question but what the hand of the Lord is in it.”

  “Yes, sir. I can see that.”

  Brigham looked up. “Did you pass the ferry this morning?”

  “Yes, I did. It seems to be operating very well.”

  “It is and I’m pleased. But it is so slow, Nathan. It’s maddening. It takes almost half an hour to get two wagons across and the ferry back for its next load.”

  “I can believe that.”

  “Half an hour! That means no more than four wagons per hour. Our best estimates are that we have about two thousand wagons either here or somewhere on the trail behind us.”

  Nathan gave a low whistle. Two thousand!

  “Even if we run the ferry day and night, that’s less than fifty wagons a day. It’s going to take us well into August just to get them across the river. Then we have the problem of getting hay for our stock, finding places where we can build whole communities for our people. You think about that for a minute. Twelve to fifteen thousand people and we have to find shelter and food for all of them through the winter.”

  He rubbed his eyes, shutting out momentarily the images which seemed to swim before them. “There’s no way we can send a large company to the Rockies this season, Nathan. That’s clear now. No way at all.”

  Nathan nodded slowly, not really surprised.

  “So that changes everything. We have to be prepared to leave first thing in the spring. It was the interminable time it took us to get across Iowa that has put us in this position. Had we gotten here in April, or even May, we could have pushed on. But now it is too late.”

  “I think it’s wise not to extend beyond our abilities,” Nathan said, still not sure why the President was telling him all of this.

  “Well, that brings us back to you and your family and what we need you to do.”

  “We stand ready to do whatever you ask of us, Brother Brigham.”

  “I know you do,” he said heartily. “In that way you’re just like your father. Benjamin was one of those rocks the Twelve could always depend on. And that’s why I’ve been thinking a lot about it. We do need volunteers for the battalion, but we also have to think about here and now.” He paused for a moment. “And next spring. It’s not too early to begin making our plans for that now.” He looked up. “I’d like to give you some counsel, Nathan.”

  “Yes, sir. I’m listening.”

  “Mind you, it’s only counsel. You are free to do what you feel is best.”

  “I understand, President.”

  “After thinking carefully about it, and talking with Heber, I have this recommendation. I would like to ask that you and Joshua and Matthew withdraw your names from the army list.”

  “All right,” Nathan said slowly, completely caught off guard.

  “We need all of you to help here.”

  “Fine.” He was thinking swiftly, trying to consider what that would mean. Lydia would be ecstatic. His mother—

  “I want you and Matthew to go with the vanguard company that will leave first thing in the spring, but I want Joshua to stay here.”

  Nathan couldn’t help it. His eyebrows shot up.

  “With his teamster and freighting experience, Joshua will be important in bringing the main company across the plains next summer.”

  “He will be disappointed in that,” Nathan said hesitantly. “He doesn’t want to leave his family, but he saw this call to the army as a way to prove to the Lord that he is willing to do whatever he is asked.”

  Brigham smiled. “Bless him for that, but tell him thisis what the Lord wants him to do.”

  “I will. What about the others?”

  Brigham’s shoulders lifted and fell. “I hate to say this, but I think your family needs to contribute someone to the army. A lot of people look up to the Steeds as an example.”

  “So Solomon and Derek?”

  “No, just Derek. If both could go, that would be wonderful, but we need men to bring along the rest of the families, both those of the battalion and those of the lead company. If Solomon goes, that would leave only Joshua and the boys to bring your family on to the Rocky Mountains.”

  Brigham stood now and came over and laid a hand on Nathan’s shoulder. “I’m sorry. I know that your family had this all worked out.”

  “We’re here to do what you think is best, President.”

  “I know,” he said softly, “and the Lord bless you for that.”

  “You’re disappointed, aren’t you?” Caroline tried to keep the note of accusation out of her voice, but it still crept in enough to be noticeable.

  “This has nothing to do with the family, Caroline. You know that.”

  “I would think you’d be elated that you don’t have to leave us. I am.”

  “You think I want to leave you?” Joshua exclaimed. “Do you think that’s why I decided to volunteer for the army?”

  “No.” She reached out in the darkness and found his hand. “I know better than that. But if President Young wants you to stay, can’t you be happy about that?”

  “He doesn’t have confidence in me. Not that I blame him. After all, I’ve only been a member for less than a month.”

  Now she understood and she was incredulous. “Joshua, that’s not why h
e asked you to stay.”

  “Isn’t it? And he’s right. Who knows if six months from now I’ll still be willing to be a Mormon?”

  “Iknow,” she said quietly.

  He went right on as if she hadn’t spoken. “Maybe I’d get out there on the road to California and say, ‘This isn’t worth it. I’m going home.’ ”

  “Do you really think that’s a possibility?”

  He grunted, whatever that meant.

  But she wouldn’t let him get away with it. “Do you?Do you have questions about whether or not you believe?”

  “I have a million questions.”

  “I’m not talking about questions involving whatyou believe, Joshua. I’m talking about questions concerning ifyou believe.”

  There was a long silence, then a quiet but firm, “No. I don’t have those kinds of questions.”

  “You heard what Nathan said. The President needs you here and for next summer. It’s as important to the overall work as going with the army. Can’t you just accept that?”

  “I’d like to, but I still wonder.”

  “Not all soldiers go to the battlefront, Joshua.”

  There was silence for a time, then a soft chuckle. “How long do you think it will be before I learn not to try to argue with you?”

  “Did I just hear a, ‘Yes, Caroline, you are right, as usual’?”

  He laughed aloud. “Yes, Caroline, you are right.”

  She poked him.

  “As usual.”

  To his surprise she didn’t laugh back at him. “Joshua, who is more important? the man with a sword in his hand, or the man who brings him food so he can continue to fight? the man who fires the cannon, or the man who brings him powder and cannonballs?”

  He was silent for several seconds. Then she felt him relax a little in the darkness. “You think that’s why Brigham wants me here? to carry powder and ball?”

  “No. Powder and ball carriers have to go to the front lines. I think Brother Brigham needs somebody to cook for the troops.”