Clash

by Belle Aurora

  Lee piped in from beside her, “Always wanted to go to Turkey.”

  Oh my God.

  Hell shuffled in his chair, suddenly looking excited. Of course, it was about food. “In Japan, there are these awesome curry joints and they are bomb.” He bumped a puzzled Cherry’s shoulder. “I’ll take you there.”

  We’re they serious?

  Beth tried to slow down the pace but immediately got cut off. “Wait, I-”

  “You and I will have to work closely together, Beth. This is your first rodeo,” offered Noah kindly. “Maybe I can help out.”

  Beth went from mildly confused to downright baffled. “I-”

  Yeah, Beth. We’re all confused, babe.

  That’s when Connor grinned. “Alright. It’s a done deal.”

  The boys continued to converse amongst each other, making plans for a tour they weren’t exactly a part of and the more enthusiastic they became, I could see the confusion on the girls’ faces grow. This went on a while. Soon, the guys were laughing at something Connor had said. And Cherry fucking lost it.

  Shooting up from her chair, she lifted her arms and her voice boomed. “Slow down, okay? Just—” She attempted to calm herself and lowered her tone, “—slow the fuck down.” Her arms dropped to her sides and she took in a deep breath before slowly letting it out. “What is happening here?”

  And just like that, Left Turn’s enthusiasm fell to the floor with a splat.

  The boys, now proceeding with caution, all pointed to Connor. “It was his idea.”

  Talk about dumbfounded. Turning to Connor, my brows shot up. “You did this?”

  Appearing somewhat like a child who had been caught gluing a Ming vase back together, he replied a somewhat defiant, “Yeah. So?”

  The shoe dropped and Cherry rolled her eyes then groaned, “Jesus, Connor. It’s six weeks. You can’t go six weeks without Emmy?”

  “It’s not that,” he started before quickly amending, “It’s not just that.” He shrugged nonchalantly before saying something super sweet. “You guys are good. Really good. And we want to be there to watch you blow up.”

  Aw. My heart.

  Also… huh? Who was this man?

  I’m sure Beth didn’t think much about what she said but when she said it, an eerie silence settled over us. “But isn’t this kind of below you?”

  The silence stretched and when I peered around the table, I saw matching expressions of displeasure on each of the guys’ faces. Noah, first to find his words, asked carefully, “Was it below you to open for us?”

  “No,” Beth replied instantly and she meant it.

  “Then why would you think that?” asked Lee, a genuine curiosity lining the question.

  Beth’s mouth opened but she couldn’t find the words.

  Ettie looked around the table and when she saw none of the Vixens could verbalize what they were feeling, she thought to give it a go. “Because you’re Left fucking Turn. Biggest rock band in the world. Biggest band in the world, period. Because, like, shit...” She trailed off. Her voice lowered a notch. “Because we look up to you.”

  My heart warmed. That must have been hard to admit.

  It also seemed I wasn’t the only one with self-esteem issues.

  “Feeling’s mutual.”

  I almost did a double-take when I realized that statement came from my husband.

  And he meant it.

  What?

  Yeah, I know. Shocked the shit out of me.

  Cherry looked around at each of the guys, finally coming to the understanding that this offer was for real. “You guys really want to do this?”

  Noah smiled then nodded, “Absolutely.”

  That seemed to snap Beth out of her daze. “Uh, I think I need to talk to Amber and Micah about this.”

  “Already have,” divulged Connor.

  Cherry’s eyes narrowed. “And what did they say?”

  “They said that it was one hundred percent your choice and that I wasn’t allowed to bully you into it,” he finished, rolling his eyes.

  Somewhat appeased, Cherry uttered a quiet, “Okay, good,” but when she looked over at Beth, I knew a decision had been made.

  Beth sat up taller and cleared her throat. “I think I speak for all of us Vixens when I say that it would be an honor and a privilege to have Left Turn open for us.”

  A moment of quiet passed by. Sneaky smiles started to show as cracks in the hard canvases of the girls’ faces and not long after, the guys stood and hugged each of the laughing girls in this beautiful moment. A friendship brought closer. And yes, the girls had always had the respect of their peers but I believed The Vixens had one more thing they didn’t have yesterday.

  Something more important to them than fame, than money, than fans.

  Equality.

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  Better Days.

  Emmy

  Four days had passed since the guys had decided to gatecrash The Vixens’ tour and since that day, it seemed like our house had become some kind of unofficial headquarters. Not a day had gone by when we didn’t have both bands spread out over our living room and deck, and I didn’t want to be rude but half the time, they didn’t need to be there. I mean, we weren’t always discussing tour stuff.

  Take today, for example.

  “Next question,” Cherry lay across the sofa and folding the page of the magazine over she, read the question out loud. “You can choose one thing to take on a deserted island. Will you choose A) a book, B) a knife, C) matches, or D) a flashlight?”

  I watched quietly from the doorway. Hell sat on the ground with his back to the sofa, his arms folded behind his head with his eyes closed. “What the fuck?” His brows bunched. “How is this going to tell me what pizza flavor I am?”

  Cherry shrugged lightly even though Hell couldn’t see her. “I don’t know, it just is. Well, which one do you choose?”

  Taking in a deep breath, he replied through an exhale., “Well, the book is out. Matches can get wet. I’ll need batteries for a flashlight. So, I guess the most useful one would be the knife.”

  “Okay,” Using a pen, she marked down his answer. “Let me just tally this up.” She did the numbers then made a face before dropping the magazine to her chest and chuckling. “Oh no.”

  Her sympathetic exclamation had Hell opening one eye. “What?”

  But Cherry kept laughing.

  Hell spun around and made to take the magazine from her but she quickly held it up over her head. I couldn’t help but notice she always seemed happier on the days we all hung out. Or, I should say, on the days where she let Hell crawl an inch closer. An odd friendship had bloomed between the two where they flirted on occasion but never let it get weird.

  “What?” Hell asked, frustrated.

  Cherry stopped laughing but couldn’t stop grinning. “You’re a yucky Hawaiian pizza.”

  Almost immediately, Hell rushed out, “No, I’m not.”

  Cherry nodded and her grin spread even wider. “You are.”

  Hell’s brow lowered and he snatched the magazine out of Cherry’s hand. “Gimme that.” He studied the results with a scrutinizing eye and when the results were in, his lips thinned. “This is bullshit.”

  Cherry’s body shook with soundless laughter.

  Hell stood, taking the magazine with him. “This is going in the trash.”

  As he walked into the kitchen, Cherry spoke through her laughter. “Hey! That’s mine.” Anyone could see she wasn’t actually upset. Quite honestly, it looked like she was having the time of her life.

  I loved that for her.

  A warm body slid into the back of mine and a strong arm circled my waist. His lips tickled my ear and when Connor spoke, I couldn’t help but laugh. “Are these fuckers ever gonna leave?”

  Spinning in his arms, I cupped his stubbly cheek with a gentle hand. “Don’t look at me. This is on you.” I quietly reminded him, “You wa
nted this.”

  He groaned and whispered, “But I wanna fuck.”

  “Oh.” The apples of my cheeks heated and lowering my eyes, I whispered back, “I have my period.”

  Connor’s chin jerked with a single nod. “Okay.”

  We stared at each other a while, studying one another’s expression and when Connor gave me a confused smile, I returned it because… what?

  His smile grew. So did mine.

  What the heck was happening here?

  Finally, Connor said, “I don’t care.”

  Wait. He didn’t care?

  He still wanted to…?

  The thought made my cheeks flame. I slapped his shoulder, “Connor!”

  He didn’t seem at all bothered. “What?”

  “We can’t,” I told him. I couldn’t believe I was having to explain this to a grown man.

  So, when he said what he said, I actually died.

  Pulling me close, he kissed me softly then put his lips to my ear and uttered, “What’s the point of having a sword if you can’t get it bloody.”

  Yeah. He said that.

  And my knees gave out.

  Luckily, Connor caught me with a “Whoa,” followed by quiet laughter as he held me up. “That’s it, isn’t it?” As I gazed into his eyes with a look that had to have told him I was not only confused but really messed up by what he just said, he clarified merrily, “I finally found your hard limit.”

  Yes. Yes, he had.

  Later that night, after a make-out session that had my limbs all wobbly-like, my hard limit was explored.

  In depth.

  It was… umm… interesting.

  Five stars.

  Some days I wished I could go back to being plain old Emily Aldrich. Unknown. Unremarkable. Invisible. And today was definitely one of those days.

  I made my way to the grocery store after spending the afternoon with Nanna and Jim at St. Jude’s. It was normally after being with the two of them that I forgot who I was now and today, I would feel the consequences of attempting to be ordinary. All I needed was a handful of items and it had been so long since I went shopping on my own. I didn’t think about how traumatizing such a mundane everyday chore could be but I would remember how it made me feel for the rest of my life.

  The moment I stepped inside the store, I felt eyes on me. This wasn’t necessarily a bad thing but the second I knew I was being watched, my body strung tighter than a bow. With my cart as a barrier, I kept my sunglasses on and tried to shop in peace. People whispered to each other as I passed and those whispers had me on edge.

  I mean, c’mon. Was it worth it? All I needed was bread and milk.

  When young girls began to follow me, my heart rate increased. And then it wasn’t just the young fans. Almost every person in the store became curious about who the crowd were following and joined ranks. It didn’t take long before one person approached and kindly asked, “Miss Violet, can I get a selfie?”

  The young man said this so politely that I bit down my anxiousness and responded, “Sure.”

  Oh my.

  What was the saying? Famous last words.

  The first picture was harmless enough and when a woman asked, all I could think to reply was, “I really need to get home.”

  It was funny, really. For people who were yelling out how much they loved me, how quickly they turned on me.

  The woman turned on her phone camera and walked towards me, “Oh, please. My daughter will never believe it.”

  Taking a step back, I tried again. “Not today. Thank you.”

  Gripping my cart, the woman walked closer to me and said, “It’ll be quick,” then snapped her phone in my face before I could say boo.

  My heart beat out of my chest. I was mad. “I said no.”

  A moment of thick silence went by before one man muttered, “That’s not nice.”

  Another said, “It’s just a photo.”

  The woman holding up her phone looked shocked. I expected an apology. What I got was a hard stare and a single word. “Bitch.”

  My stomach coiled. More so when I noticed the crowd of twentyish people frowning at me as if I had done something wrong.

  Had I done something wrong?

  I didn’t think so but they were mad at me so I must have done something wrong, right?

  I couldn’t think. I needed to get out of there.

  Head down, I wheeled my cart to the checkout and loaded my items onto the conveyor belt. I didn’t notice the mob of people following me until one person spoke from behind. “You know, you’re only famous because of people like us. You owe us. The least you could do was take photos with your fans. We deserve to be acknowledged.”

  It was the woman with the phone. The crowd murmured in agreement.

  I didn’t make eye contact. “I’m a person. A human being.”

  The same woman responded, “No. You’re public property. We own you.”

  I was anxious before but the foreboding way she said this made me jump from nervous to terrified. My voice shook as I pleaded, “Please leave me alone.”

  The woman’s caustic laughter had my insides turning. I paid for my groceries and walked back to my car, begging myself to hold it together. But I knew I was being followed. With shaking hands, I unlocked the car and threw the groceries in, making sure to lock it behind me.

  When I turned on the car and looked up, my heart stuttered.

  The woman was standing in front of the car, holding up her phone and she was recording me while ranting, “No photos, huh? What are you gonna do about it, Miss Violet? Who’s going to stop me? You? I don’t think so.” Her laughter became more and more deranged. “You know what the problem with celebrities is? They don’t care who they offended or hurt. Well, guess what? I’m not taking it anymore. You want to live in L.A. and expect people to not to approach you? Dream on, honey.”

  I didn’t know what to do. With a car parked behind me and this obviously unstable woman in front of me, I was trapped.

  The more she ranted, the more her words pierced me. “Who do you think you are? You think you’re special? You’re just another fat-lipped, big-tittied nobody!”

  She had no idea how those words affected me and in the back of my mind, I wanted to respond, “I know.”

  “In ten years, you’re just going to be another washed-up superstar, wasted on booze and reminiscing about the time you were famous.”

  I know.

  The bridge of my nose tingled. My eye blurred with unshed tears. “Please move.”

  “Mark my words, honey. You think you’re irreplaceable? Just you wait. One day, that Connor Clash of yours is going to come home later and later until he just doesn’t come home anymore.”

  Oh my God, please. Stop.

  She was hitting my every last nerve. It was as though she had dug into the box in my mind marked ‘Emmy’s insecurities’ and was using them all against me, throwing them at me one-by-one.

  Tears trailed my cheeks and as I begged one last time, my voice shook. “Get out of the way.”

  The woman seemed to have done what she wanted because the smile pasted on her face was one of pure satisfaction. “Aw, look. The big baby’s crying. Wah.”

  Finally, she moved to the side of my car and when I drove off, I heard her yell out, “Bye, bitch.”

  I cried the entire way home.

  And that was the last time I would go grocery shopping on my own.

  In fact, it was the last time I would go anywhere on my own.

  When I got home, I plead a headache, went straight up to our room and threw myself into bed, fully clothed. I turned off my phone because I wasn’t an idiot. Soon, the notifications would start rolling in. I didn’t want to see them. I didn’t want to hear that woman and her entitled yelling. I just wanted to sleep and wake up when social media had found its next victim.

  It wasn’t long before my super sweet best friend, Roxie, came looking for me a
nd it was almost as though she could feel my emotions. She lay beside me, quiet and still, and rested her chin onto my belly. I scratched her behind the ear and sighed, speaking more to myself than my doggy friend, “People can be so cruel.”

  I know it was something people said but to me, it was something people had done. They had done it to me my entire life. And it was something they continued to do.

  I wondered if there would ever be a time when kindness would be cool. I secretly wished and hoped and prayed for such a time. Alas, today was not to be that day. I knew as much when the bedroom door opened then closed and Connor walked over to the bed. He sat down, looked at me with tender concern, stroked my cheek with gentle fingers and asked softly, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  I couldn’t help myself. I huffed out a humorless laugh, “Already gone viral, has it? Cool.” Covering my face with my forearm, I pretended not to care as my heart broke. “So, I had a day. Who hasn’t? It’ll blow over. It always does.”

  “Emmy,” Connor uttered gently, guardedly, and his tone had me lifting my head to look him in the eye. When he didn’t return my gaze, my heart stuttered. And when he took my hand, his thumb rubbing my knuckles, I knew something was wrong. He tried to break it to me gently, his tone even but quiet, “Something else happened, baby.”

  Oh, yeah. Something was very wrong.

  Great. Just great. “Tell me.”

  He shook his head. “I can’t.”

  I frowned. “Tell me, Connor.”

  “I can’t,” he said firmly before lifting his chin to look at me. “It’s something I have to show you.”

  My body felt numb. And I could feel Connor’s hesitation.

  As he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, I moved to sit up against the headboard and prepared myself knowing it was bad. He handed me the cell, not bothering to watch with me. After all, he’d already seen the shitshow.

  The woman on the screen looked familiar but I couldn’t pinpoint from where. She was pretty with long blonde hair, a full face of makeup and a wide mouth.

  “Hey, guys,” She waved and smiled, “It’s me, Bee. Do I have a story for you?! You’re going to love this. Okay, so I’m minding my own business and this video comes up of this The Violet Dame being cornered and yelled at. She’s crying and all I can think to myself is, ‘I know that girl.’ Mind you, I can’t think of where I know her from so I keep watching. And she’s getting upset, like, real upset. So, I’m watching and watching, and then she says, ‘Please leave me alone,’ and the way she says it, it’s like,” she clapped, hard, “Boom. I’m back in high school.”