by Okina Baba
In that time, my stats and skills have shot up at a remarkable rate under White’s training, and now she’s asking me to take the next step in her little regimen.
She even demonstrated by attacking herself with Dark Magic.
Something that looked like black lightning struck her body, but White didn’t even react.
She looked so calm about it that I figured it must not hurt, so I reached out and touched the lightning.
In that instant, much to my horror, my hand went flying off.
That’s right. My hand. Came off.
Do you understand what I’m saying?
As soon as I touched the lightning, my vision went black, and the next thing I knew, my hand was no longer attached to my wrist.
I’ve never passed out from sheer terror before, not in this life or my previous one.
When I woke up, my face was a mess of tears and snot, and Merazophis was holding me.
And my missing hand was back where it belonged.
I guess it was fixed with Healing Magic right away, but I had been in too much of a panic to realize it.
Even once I returned to my senses, I still couldn’t stop my crying, and Merazophis had to cradle me reassuringly for a few more minutes.
When I noticed that Merazophis’s clothes were now soaked and snotty, I almost wanted to die.
And the moment I finally calmed down, White spoke up, completely oblivious to the mood.
“Okay, now you try.”
I’m not going to do that!
That’s…that’s hardly any different from telling me to die.
How can she demand that so calmly?
The only explanation I have is that she’s crazy.
And yet, she has the nerve to cock her head at me like she’s confused that I’m against it.
Her expression hardly ever changes, but she gets her emotions across a little with gestures like this. She often did the same thing in our old world, too.
As if she has no other way of expressing her feelings.
Normally, that would seem disingenuous, but somehow when White does it, it’s almost charming. Beautiful people have all the luck.
After considering my reaction, White assumes a pose like the Thinker statue.
Immediately, an uncomfortable feeling assails my body.
I know now that it’s the feeling that comes with being Appraised; I’ve felt it quite often since this journey started.
Since it means someone else is reading your status, your personal information, it’s only natural that it would feel strange.
I think White wants to figure out whether I can actually do what she wants.
Then, evidently concluding that I should be able to do it, she tilts her head a little, still in the Thinker pose.
She doesn’t get it.
Whether I’m physically capable and whether I’m actually willing to do it are two entirely different things.
I mean, anyone can jump off a cliff, right?
But that doesn’t mean most people would do it simply because they were told to.
What White’s saying isn’t far off from that, but she can’t fathom why I would refuse.
Something’s wrong with her.
I certainly don’t enjoy it when she trains me by walking me with her spider thread, but I accept it because there’s a fairly good reason for it.
Although even then, it’s not like White was the one who told me the reason. Ariel had to explain it to me for her.
White would rather either force me to do it without explanation or give a demonstration and then order me to do the same, just like this time.
Either way, she never explains the logic behind her demands.
“Listen, White. I think you’re gonna have to explain it this time or she’s not gonna do it, okay?”
As usual, Ariel steps in to reason with her.
But White doesn’t answer or explain.
“Oh, all right. I’ll explain, then. Hitting yourself with Attack Magic is meant to train both your magic skills and resistance skills. Your magic skills will improve because you’re casting the spell, and your resistance skills will improve because you’re enduring the hit. Two birds with one stone, right? Of course, your resistance technically goes up anyway when you use magic or other skills of the corresponding attribute, but it’s seriously an itty-bitty amount, so it makes sense to try to actively raise both at once. That being said, most people aren’t crazy enough to train by harming themselves.”
Thanks to Ariel’s explanation, now I understand the point of the training.
But, exactly as she said, I doubt most people would be crazy enough to try this.
Causing yourself massive, near-fatal injury to raise a resistance skill that’s meant to reduce the amount of damage you take? Isn’t that putting the cart before the horse?
“Ah, that explanation isn’t really cutting it for you, is it, Sophia? I’m sure you’re wondering why anyone would put their life on the line just to raise their skills. But what happened earlier was only because White’s magic is so strong—normally, you wouldn’t use such an intense attack. Since you’re the one casting the spell, you can make it as strong or as weak as you like, really.”
My eyes widen at that.
When I think about Ariel’s words for a minute, not to mention the strength of my own magic, it finally makes sense.
Of course. It’s not like I’d actually have to use magic so strong that it could blow off my hand like earlier.
In fact, I’m not even capable of that in the first place.
And even if I could, of course I wouldn’t use it on myself.
I was under a mistaken assumption the entire time.
So all I have to do is use magic weak enough that I can bear it, right?
When I finally figure that out, all my panicking suddenly seems pitiful.
It’s so simple, but I was blathering away that I couldn’t do it.
No wonder White was tilting her head at me!
I’m so embarrassed!
“I’m sorry.”
I made a huge fuss based on a wrong assumption. The least I can do is apologize.
“Nah, I can’t really blame you after what happened, especially since White didn’t explain a damn thing. She should’ve at least waited for you to calm down a little before she started going off. But she doesn’t really know how to be that tactful.”
Ariel half glares at White, who seems to recoil a little.
Maybe she actually feels bad?
I thought she might even apologize for blowing off my hand and all, but in the end, White didn’t open her mouth.
Our journey seems to be going well.
That being said, our destination, Sariella’s capital, is still far away.
Keren County, where we once lived, is at the very edge of Sariella.
The capital is somewhere in the middle, but Sariella is a rather large country, so of course it’s a considerable distance away.
And since our group has to match its pace with mine, we’re not getting anywhere fast.
I’m somehow walking with the help of the mysterious power of stats, but that doesn’t make my legs any longer.
Naturally, the distance I can travel is a lot shorter than an adult.
It doesn’t help that, since we’re trying to keep from being seen, we’re traveling through harsh mountains, dense forests, and so on, not anywhere with nice, easy paths.
I’ve even gotten used to sleeping outside, although it helps that we get to stay in a town once in a while.
Yet for some reason, every time we visit a town, Merazophis always looks unhappy.
I’ve asked him a few times what’s the matter, but he only ever says that “everything is fine.”
I’m sure he just doesn’t want to worry me, but it only makes me even more certain that something is definitely wrong.
I wish he would talk to me about it, but Merazophis feels an obligation to protect me at all times. He doesn’t want to troub
le his “master” with his own personal problems, so instead, he bottles them up inside.
But seeing him suffering on his own still ends up troubling me…
Isn’t there anything I can do for Merazophis?
He’s helped me so much, I’d love to return the favor at least a little.
Without Merazophis, I’m sure I’d be done by now.
And I mean that both physically and mentally.
If Merazophis hadn’t put his life on the line to protect me, I would’ve been killed that day by Potimas the elf.
And even after finding out that I’m a reincarnation and a vampire, he’s still continued to put me first in everything he does.
I can’t even say how much that has helped me.
Merazophis is the only reason I’ve been able to get through these circumstances without breaking.
Because of him, I’ve been able to accept this world for what it is without trying to escape.
When I first reincarnated here, I told myself that this world was just a dream or something.
After all, it clearly wasn’t Japan, had strange things like “stats,” and most of all, I was a vampire.
It wasn’t easy to accept that this is my new reality.
Surely, having my old self reset and being forced to start over in this bizarre new world was just a bad dream.
But no matter how long it went on, I didn’t wake up, and I had to acknowledge that this was reality.
I vowed to start a new life in this new world, with my new parents.
And then they both died.
Right after I’d vowed to put aside my feelings about my old life and move forward, I lost nearly everything all over again.
A reset after a reset.
It’s no surprise I really wanted to run away from reality this time.
But Merazophis is the one who saved me from that.
I lost everything else, but Merazophis stayed with me.
He became the proof that there was a time when I lived in that mansion and was loved by those parents, no matter how short it might have been.
Because he is here to remind me of that, I can keep my eyes on reality.
Merazophis saves me simply by existing.
I can’t ever thank him enough.
Which is why I want him to put aside his worries about our roles and let me help him.
“But no matter how many times I ask him, he just won’t answer. Do you have any idea what might be troubling Merazophis, Miss Ariel?”
“Uh… Hmm.”
I’m asking Ariel for advice.
It’s the middle of the day, and the sun is shining brightly.
But Ariel and I are the only ones awake.
As vampires, Merazophis and I are nocturnal, so other than when we visit a town, we’ve naturally started doing most of our travel at night.
Thus, Merazophis is now resting in the shade.
White is resting, too, in a cocoon of sorts made from white thread.
Apparently, it’s a “simple home” made of spider thread.
White has Status Condition Nullification, which includes Exhaustion Nullification, so technically she doesn’t have to sleep.
However, that really just means that not sleeping doesn’t have any negative effects for her; she still gains the benefits of sleep, like physical healing.
Most of all, sleeping still feels good, so she does it when she’s in the mood, as far as I can tell.
Since the two of them are asleep, it’s the perfect chance to get advice.
I can’t talk about it in front of Merazophis himself, of course, and I don’t want White to hear it.
Besides, given how silent and expressionless she is, I doubt she’d understand such a delicate topic.
Despite Ariel’s youthful appearance, she has countless years of experience, and she always looks after us like our elder, so I feel safe consulting her.
“Hrmmm.”
This time, however, she only frowns after listening to my question, not giving me a clear answer.
Does she not know what’s bothering Merazophis?
Or is it that she does know, and it’s so serious that she’s hesitant to reveal it to me?
“Miss Ariel, is Merazophis’s problem that serious?” I ask nervously.
“Yeah, I suppose so,” she responds frankly. “But it’s not like his life is in danger or anything. It’s not the kind of thing that’s going to cause immediate problems. But it’s not the kind of thing that can be solved immediately, either.”
I seriously can’t tell if she’s trying to reassure me or make me worry even more.
After a moment of silence, Ariel opens her mouth again.
“To be perfectly honest, there’s nothing you can do about it.”
That’s hard for me to accept.
But I think Ariel knew it would be when she said it. I don’t normally hear her speak so firmly.
“In fact, if you try to get involved, it might only make things more complicated. And by ‘might,’ I mean ‘definitely will.’ So I understand you’re worried, but all you can do right now is give him space.”
Me getting involved would make it more complicated?
What does that mean?
“I’m sure it’s frustrating, but the best thing you can do for him is nothing at all. Sticking your nose in it will only make things worse. I understand that when someone you care about is suffering, you want to help them, but this is one situation where you’ll have to pretend like nothing’s wrong. I think you acting normal would be the best thing for Merazophis right now. He’ll likely figure it out on his own, little by little, so try not to worry.”
I don’t really understand what Ariel’s saying.
Since I don’t know what’s bothering Merazophis so much, the whole thing is very vague.
But I do get the gist of what she wants from me: don’t do anything.
Part of me does want to reject that, of course, but her statement that I would only make things worse stops me in my tracks.
I want to help, but I’d make things more “complicated.”
So all I can do is stay quiet?
“Can’t you at least tell me what’s bothering Merazophis so much? Please?”
Knowing would make it easier to accept that I can’t help.
“Sorry, but I think you’re better off not knowing, sooo…nope.”
It sounds like she’s mocking me.
“Please don’t joke about this!”
My tone via Telepathy gets angry, but her response is surprisingly serious.
“I’m not really trying to,” she says simply. “It’s just better this way. Like I said before, it’s best if you don’t get involved in this situation, both for Merazophis’s sake and your own.”
For my own sake?
“That’s all I can tell you. I’m sure that doesn’t make you feel much better, but you gotta trust Merazophis and wait for now.”
Despite my stubbornness, Ariel doesn’t seem willing to say any more.
“Or do you not trust Merazophis, Little Miss Sophia?”
…That’s playing dirty.
Ariel can be very unfair sometimes.
I don’t know if it’s because of her age, but she has a tendency to say things in a way that makes it impossible to argue.
“Of course I do,” I answer reluctantly.
What else am I supposed to say?
I do trust Merazophis.
Since she put it that way, it seems like I really do have no choice but to trust him and wait.
“Glad to hear it. To be honest, I didn’t know what I was gonna do if you kept bugging me to tell you. I don’t want to tell you, of course, but you can be almost as awkward as White when it comes to dealing with other people, y’know? I’m afraid if you find out, you won’t be able to hide it, and that’ll make things awkward between you and Merazophis for sure.”
Her serious attitude vanishes, and Ariel snickers as she teases me.
“Please don’t com
pare me to White. Her issues go far beyond being ‘awkward,’ don’t you think?” Getting annoyed, I respond crossly without thinking.
It’s true that no one would say I’m good with people.
But I’m not like White, who doesn’t make any effort to interact with others in the first place.
I did try to connect with others; it just never worked because of my appearance.
“Yeah? Hmm. I’ve been wondering for a while… Why are you so hostile toward White anyway?”
Ariel tilts her head at me, not unlike White’s pose when she doesn’t understand something.
“What do you mean, ‘why’? Isn’t it obvious?”
Ariel just tilts her head even farther.
“Uh, I don’t think it’s as obvious as you think it is. I mean, White saved your life, didn’t she? Why do you hate her so much?”
That makes me stop and think.
She’s right.
White really did save my life.
But instead of being grateful, I just hate her.
From Ariel’s perspective, I’m the one being unreasonable!
“But, well, she’s been so awful to me during this entire journey…”
“She’s not doing it for no reason, though. We don’t know what might happen in the future, so she’s trying to train up your stats and skills while we have the chance. I mean, yeah, her Spartan methods are a little over-the-top, but her intentions are still in the right place—she’s just a bit weird, that’s all. You know that, right? There’s no reason to be so dead set against her.”
Ariel counters my excuse without missing a beat.
“I think her training is a good idea, too. There’s a lot more fighting in this world than the one you guys came from. Bulking up now is a good move. That’s why White decided to train you and why I didn’t stop her. Frankly, I think that makes White a lot nicer and more thoughtful than I am.”
That’s definitely not true.
I want to say that, but I manage to swallow those words.
Is that really what White is thinking?
If I look back objectively on everything White’s done, like Ariel says, it does seem like she’s simply trying to help me.
My stats and skills really have grown at an incredible rate.
But somehow, I can’t accept it.
“I can’t deny that it’s been hard on you, though. Guess it’s just one of those things, eh? Like when a mother is harsh on her child to make them stronger.”