by A. K. Evans
Just as I had suspected, Zev felt nothing but defeat at my words. His eyes closed slowly and his shoulders fell. I watched as he took a few breaths like that before lifting his gaze to mine. Then he said, “The answer to your question is yes. Yes, it bothers me that you moved here. Because you did it to give yourself what you needed so you could find some peace and healing. You didn’t get that. And I know now that had I not pushed you away like I did, you’d still be back in Saguaro with me.”
I’d be back in Saguaro with him.
He was right.
I never would have made the move if things had gone differently between us. It was what it was now, but the reality of how we’d gotten here was painful for both of us to accept.
“So, what happens now?” I asked, unable to stand the constant question in the back of my mind.
“I don’t know, babe. I just know that I don’t want to live another day of my life without having you in it. I’ve never felt so empty before in my life. You filled me up in a way nobody else ever has or ever will,” he shared.
I loved that.
Loved it.
But it still didn’t give me the answers I’d been seeking. Were Zev and I just going to go back to being best friends? And if so, could I ignore the fact that I’d slept with my best friend, that it was the best night of my life, and that he wasn’t into me that same way?
I knew myself. I’d take Zev anyway I could have him.
But I wanted more than just his friendship.
I wanted his whole heart to be mine.
“Tillie?” he called.
“Hmm?” I responded.
“Say what’s on your mind,” he urged.
Without taking the time to think about it, I blurted, “Where do we stand?”
His hand was still on my cheek. At my words, his thumb stopped stroking the skin there. “Where do we stand?” he repeated.
I nodded and clarified, “Yes. Where do we stand? Are you planning to go back to being my best friend? Are we going to pretend it never happened? Or is there something else here?”
His face twisted. I was nervous about his response, so I added, “Before you answer, I need you to know that I’m not asking you for anything. I don’t have any expectations. But I need you to be clear about it with me so that I’m not left wondering.”
“What do you want it to be?” he asked.
“Zev, I don’t want to put any pressure on you to—”
That was all I got out before his fingers tightened around mine and he cut me off. His voice held an edge of determination when he semi-repeated his question. “What do you want, Tillie?”
I swallowed hard and admitted, “I want all of you.”
He moved closer and promised, “Then you’ll have all of me.”
Not a moment later, his mouth was on mine.
It was glorious. Everything I’d been wanting since the last time I kissed him.
Within seconds, I was moaning and my hands were everywhere. His were everywhere.
Eventually, Zev leaned his back against the armrest, taking me with him. His mouth never left mine. One of his hands that had been wrapped around my waist, holding me close to him, started traveling south. It dipped low, sliding over the curve of my ass, until it settled there.
Even through the fabric of my cotton shorts, I loved the feel of his hands on me again. Apparently, Zev liked it, too. I could feel the proof of that pressing into me. And feeling it, I began craving him with a need and desperation that was as crucial to my survival as the air in my lungs.
As his tongue continued to explore my mouth, Zev’s hand that had been on my ass came up and slipped under the waistband of my shorts and into my panties. When he squeezed my bottom, I moaned.
Unable to stand it any longer, I pulled my mouth from his and lifted myself a bit from his body. I wanted to explore him in a way I hadn’t had a chance to the first time we were together. Bunching Zev’s shirt up in my hands, he caught my drift and shifted so I could remove the shirt altogether. Of course, that meant his hand was no longer on my ass.
But once Zev’s shirt was gone, he wasted no time in removing mine. My thighs were just barely straddling his, and the couch was small. Zev sat up, keeping a firm hold on me at my hip and behind my back, as he turned.
With his back now against the back of the couch and my booty in his lap, Zev’s eyes roamed over me. He showed his appreciation for what he saw just by the hot and spicy look in his eyes. That hot and spicy gaze was mixed with a sweet and tender brush of his fingertips across my collarbone.
While one of his hands was gently touching me, the other was working behind my back to unhook my bra. The moment the hooks were free, I brought my hands to my shoulders and lowered the straps down my arms. Zev’s eyes left my body only long enough to glance up at me and smile.
One of his hands came up to cup my breast, and as his thumb stroked over my nipple, he said softly, “You’re even more beautiful than I remembered.”
“Zev…” I trailed off.
“I thought I remembered everything,” he continued, giving my breast a gentle squeeze as he brought his other hand up to the opposite one.
Bringing my hands up to cover his, I waited for him to return his attention to my face. When he did, I practically purred, “You’ve got all night to refresh your memory.”
Zev shot me a grin.
“I like when your hands are on my body,” I shared, thinking it was important to tell him what I enjoyed.
His fingertips pressed in just a touch before he replied, “That’s good, babe. Because I love touching your body.”
Rolling my hips over him as I tried to relieve the building pressure between my legs, I added, “I also like when you kiss me… on my mouth and on my breasts.”
Zev wasted no time in giving me what I liked. He leaned forward and held both breasts in front of his face. Mere seconds later, he buried his face between them and began kissing me. He worked his way around the soft, round flesh until he landed at my nipple. When he flicked his tongue over the hardened bud and sucked it into his mouth, my back arched and my hips rolled over him again.
He pulled back just a touch and tipped his head back.
“I’d like to kiss you in other places, Tillie,” he whispered.
I had a good feeling I knew where those other places were. One of them was particularly excited about Zev’s interest in paying it some attention.
“Okay,” I rasped.
The next thing I knew, Zev was standing with my legs wrapped around him as he walked through my house to the bedroom. Once there, he lowered me to my back in the bed. His fingers curled around the waistband of my shorts and panties before he yanked them down my legs.
Instantly, I shifted myself back in the bed, clamped my legs together, and bent my knees, feeling a bit shy. Zev must have noticed because he joined me in the bed, brought a hand to the side of my thigh, and called, “Tillie?”
“Yeah?”
“Relax, baby,” he urged.
I nodded but didn’t find myself relaxing.
Zev gave my thigh a squeeze and said gently, “Open your legs for me.”
The look of love in his eyes and the sound of his voice did me in. I hesitated only briefly before I relaxed and allowed my legs to drop open.
“That’s it, babe,” he praised me. “It’s just us.”
I watched as Zev lowered himself down between my legs and began kissing me. His mouth was on my inner knee, and he slowly worked his way up to my inner thigh. He did this on both legs until he’d reached the top. I squirmed the entire time in anticipation of what was to come.
When he stopped kissing my legs and made no move to do anything else, I lifted my head and looked down at him. I nearly came on the spot just seeing him there.
“Zev?” I called.
“Hmm?”
“Please,” I begged.
I didn’t exactly know what I was begging for, but Zev must have had a pretty good idea. Because the next thing I k
new, I could no longer see his face. At least, not much of it. It didn’t matter anyway. The moment his lips touched me, I was done.
When his tongue swiped through, I was gone.
From that point forward, everything else ceased to exist. All that mattered was Zev, his mouth, his hands, and what he was doing to me with both. My body was completely at Zev’s mercy.
He made me feel things I never even knew were possible. He licked and sucked, moving his tongue in ways that seriously excited me. I couldn’t stop my hips from moving against his mouth as my moans and whimpers filled the air around us. With my thighs thrown over his shoulders, Zev’s hands reached up toward my chest where he held my breasts in his hands and toyed with my nipples.
I loved that, and my hips jerked again in response.
It didn’t take him long to get me to that happy place, and I thought I should warn him.
“Zev… honey… I’m going to come,” I breathed.
What Zev didn’t do was stop. Hearing my words only served to make him work me harder. The relentless pressure of his tongue against my clit combined with his obvious determination to see me through to the end sent me over the edge. My orgasm tore through me, and it was by some miracle that I could hear how much Zev appreciated it. The vibration of his groan against me prolonged my pleasure.
Zev didn’t stop until my orgasm left me. When it did, he crawled up my body, running his hands along my sides as he kissed me everywhere. I was convinced he hadn’t missed a single spot.
Once we were face-to-face again, he pressed a kiss to my mouth. I could taste myself on his lips, and even though I thought I was completely spent, I was suddenly very turned on again.
Zev rolled himself from my body, twisting me with him as he lowered his back to the mound of pillows on my bed with my legs straddling his lap.
“I need you. I need to be inside you again, Tillie,” he stressed, one of his hands coming around my back while he used the other to position the head of his penis at my opening.
My hands gripped his shoulders as I sank down onto him. We moaned simultaneously at the sensation.
“You feel amazing,” I shared. “God, I missed you.”
Zev leaned forward, cupping my breasts in his hands, and kissed one of my nipples. He swirled his tongue around it twice before looking up at me and asking, “Can you move, baby?”
I didn’t quite know what I was doing, but I knew I was going to try my hardest to make him feel as good as he had made me feel. So, I gave him a smile and nod before I moved. It took me a minute to get a rhythm going. Once I had it, though, I felt so powerful. That was also encouraged by the fact that I’d glanced down at Zev and found him looking at me like I was some sort of superhero.
I continued to move my hips over him as his hands roamed over my body.
His touch.
His touch did things to me that I couldn’t comprehend.
All I knew was that I liked it a lot.
Then he brought his mouth to my breasts again and showered them with attention. I couldn’t decide if I liked that or his hands more.
Between his teasing mouth, his gentle touch, and the feel of him inside me, I started to feel it begin building again. And I wanted it badly.
So I moved faster.
Zev’s hands gripped my thighs harder.
My breathing grew shallow.
“Zev,” I panted once I felt myself right there.
“Come with me, Tillie,” he instructed.
I did.
Luckily, Zev had moved his hands from my thighs to my hips and managed to thrust himself into me because I lost all sense of control when it hit. It hit hard and long. And it was not only that way for me, but for Zev as well.
Feeling utterly spent after it left me, I slumped forward and pressed my forehead into Zev’s shoulder. He was still inside me and made no attempt to move my body from his. Through my labored breathing, Zev’s fingertips traced delicately along the clammy skin of my back.
It took some time, but I eventually got my breathing under control. When I did, I pulled back and gave Zev a kiss.
“That was a heck of a reunion,” I teased.
Zev laughed and warned, “As much as I loved what we just had, we are not going to be having another reunion ever again.”
“I think that’s a good idea,” I agreed. “I’m not sure my body could handle that again.”
Zev flipped me to my back and assured me, “Your body was built to handle a lot more than that. We’ll just have to work you up to it.”
I rolled my eyes at him.
When they settled on his face again, he was gazing at me. I loved when he did that.
After several moments of silence, he whispered, “I love you, Tillie.”
Tears filled my eyes as I replied, “I love you, too.”
With that, Zev gave me another kiss before burying his face in my neck.
I did all I could do and held on tight.
Zev
I watched as Tillie walked back to the bed.
With each step she took toward me, especially with that look in her eyes, I couldn’t have been more grateful.
Grateful that Tillie was who she was and had forgiven me for what I’d done to her.
Admittedly, I’d had no idea what to expect when I arrived in Sedona. As I spent all day outside her store, I watched as the steady stream of customers flowed in and out. Even though Tillie hadn’t been there most of the day, I still stayed. And aside from the worry I felt over whether she’d accept my apology or even allow me to talk to her at all, I felt proud.
I always knew Tillie would be successful. She had been before she moved here. But this was a whole other level of success. She deserved it, and it was the only thing that helped me feel a little less guilt over pushing her away.
Just over an hour before her store was set to close, Tillie arrived. Seeing her for the first time in months affected me in a way I never expected. She was just as beautiful as ever, even if I could see how she was still hurting. As much as I wanted to go in and talk to her immediately, I couldn’t. I needed that extra time to pull myself together.
Somehow, I was the luckiest man alive because now I was here in her bed after we’d just made love for the second time ever.
The second she stepped out of the bathroom, her eyes came to mine. Tillie was completely naked, and there was a bit of hesitation on her part. It was clear she was unsure what to do. That uncertainty did something to me I couldn’t begin to describe.
Tillie was always so confident and sure of herself and what she wanted. But this was new territory for her. For us. I never thought I’d see her so timid, but I liked it an awful lot. She was incredibly cute, and it made me excited for the future with her. I had little doubt that navigating this new part of our relationship was going to be a blast. I looked forward to learning all about this new side of my favorite girl.
Eventually, Tillie slid a pair of panties up her legs before she turned toward the bed and walked toward me.
She climbed in and immediately curled her gorgeous body into mine.
“We need to talk,” I declared as my arm wrapped around her back and my hand settled near her hip.
“Okay. About what?” she asked.
“A few things,” I started. “First things first, though. We’ve had unprotected sex twice now. From a health standpoint, it’s only ever been you, so there are no concerns. But from a pregnancy standpoint, I don’t know where we stand. Am I right to assume that you’re not on birth control?”
Tillie’s body had gone solid. “Oh my God. I never thought about that, Zev. I’ve never had a reason to be on birth control, so you’d be right.”
“Relax, babe,” I urged her. “I’m sure we have nothing to worry about, but if something comes of this, I’m okay with that.”
That caused Tillie to lift her head from my chest. “Really?” she asked.
I gave her an incredulous look. “Tillie, I’ve dreamed of having a family with you my whole li
fe. I would not be upset at all.”
She swallowed hard at my admission.
Sensing some uneasiness, I clarified, “I’m not saying I’m hoping it happens now, but I can think of worse things than having a baby with you.”
Tillie cautiously dipped her chin.
“Based on your reaction, I’m guessing you aren’t ready,” I noted.
“It’s fast, honey,” she rasped. “I want a family with you one day, but this would be sooner than I expected.”
I gave her a squeeze. “I agree, which means that until we get out tomorrow morning to get some condoms, I’m withholding sex from you.”
“Darn,” she muttered.
I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. When I settled myself down, I cocked an eyebrow and shot her a smug look. “Am I that good?” I asked.
It was like I could see the stars in her eyes when she sighed, “The best I’ve ever had.”
There was a smile tugging at her lips when I pointed out, “I’m the only one you’ve had.”
“Fine. Then, rest assured that I’ve got no plans to do any comparisons. I’m perfectly happy with what I’ve got,” she insisted.
Hearing her words, I couldn’t hold myself back. I rolled her to her back and settled myself over her before I kissed her. “That’s good to hear, babe.”
I stayed there like that for a bit just looking down at her. It seemed I was still having a bit of trouble processing the fact that I was here with her right now.
The silence stretched between us, and Tillie finally asked, “So, what else did we need to talk about?”
After shifting my body to the side, I propped my head in my hand and draped my other arm over her. Then I answered, “Us.”
“Us?” she repeated.
“Yeah. More specifically, we need to figure out what our plan is here,” I started. “Obviously, you’re doing well here. It seems that you’re planning to be here for the foreseeable future. But I was just at your home in Saguaro, and it’s not on the market. So, I guess I don’t want to make any assumptions about what your plans are moving forward.”
Without hesitating, Tillie explained, “When I decided to make the move, I couldn’t bring myself to sell the house. Even though I was feeling as awful as I was at that point, I still didn’t want to completely let go of Saguaro. My plan was to give myself six months here before I made any official decisions.”