Suddenly, there in the cool quiet of the barn, I realized that I’d never felt more alone.
That’s when my tears began. And after all that time, they came hard. I cried as I had never cried before, standing amid the few items left from my past. These weren’t the kind of tears that fall softly during sad movies, or the kind that slip out during sentimental moments. No, these tears didn’t come out of any kind of pleasure or even sadness. These tears were hard and real and they came from pain.
I cried for what seemed like a long, long time. I cried so hard my whole body hurt. I cried so hard I could barely see.
But I noticed when the barn door opened and a light came on.
I noticed when Dawn walked in.
Without a word, she came toward me, arms open. She was crying too. We sank to the floor together to sit and cry some more.
Finally, our sobs slowed. I felt her arm around me and knew that I wasn’t alone. Dawn, who had lost her house, her things, might not have been there for the fire, but she was here now. And there were things she understood. My dad and Sharon understood too. And there were my friends, who were doing their best to help even though they would never truly understand.
“How did you know I was here?” I asked when I could speak again.
“Because I knew this was where I’d want to be,” she replied. “I woke up just as you left our room. And when you didn’t come back, I realized where you must have gone. I know how it feels. I’m drawn to this place too. Remember, I came all the way from California to be here.”
She did understand.
“I — I feel so lost,” I said. “It’s like I don’t know where I belong anymore, or who I am.” Still more tears spilled out.
“I know,” said Dawn, stroking my hair. “I know.”
It felt so good to cry. At last I was feeling something, and even though it hurt terribly, it was better than feeling numb. I talked some more, letting everything come out. Everything I hadn’t let myself think until now, about my sadness and my fears. Dawn just listened, and comforted me, and let me cry.
We talked about everything that night. About how Dawn would have to go back to California soon, and how my future in Stoneybrook was far from certain. Dawn made me promise that I wouldn’t let Sharon and my dad make any decisions without hearing my opinion.
“You know,” she pointed out gently, “sometimes good things grow from bad things. Maybe this really is a chance for a new beginning.”
I nodded, but I didn’t feel the truth of what Dawn was saying. Maybe someday I would. That was something I could hope for. In the meantime, I would have to hang on to what I had. These few sad objects, saved from the fire — and the love of my friends and family. With these things, I would begin a new life.
* * *
Dear Reader,
If you have just finished reading this book, then you know about the big change in Mary Anne Spier’s life that may be one of the biggest crises any of the BSC members has ever faced. Mary Anne doesn’t know where her family is going to live, or even if they’re going to stay in Stoneybrook. Her life is going to change … and so is the Baby-sitters Club.
Next month will mark the start of the BSC Friends Forever series. The BSC is going to get a whole new look — and a lot of big things are going to happen. I don’t want to give away any of the surprises, so keep an eye out for the BSC Friends Forever Special: Everything Changes, followed by BSC Friends Forever #1: Kristy’s Big News. I’m very excited about the new changes and hope you will be too!
Happy reading,
* * *
The author gratefully acknowledges
Ellen Miles
for her help in
preparing this manuscript.
About the Author
ANN MATTHEWS MARTIN was born on August 12, 1955. She grew up in Princeton, New Jersey, with her parents and her younger sister, Jane.
There are currently over 176 million copies of The Baby-sitters Club in print. (If you stacked all of these books up, the pile would be 21,245 miles high.)In addition to The Baby-sitters Club, Ann is the author of two other series, Main Street and Family Tree. Her novels include Belle Teal, A Corner of the Universe (a Newbery Honor book), Here Today, A Dog’s Life, On Christmas Eve, Everything for a Dog, Ten Rules for Living with My Sister, and Ten Good and Bad Things About My Life (So Far). She is also the coauthor, with Laura Godwin, of the Doll People series.
Ann lives in upstate New York with her dog and her cats.
Copyright © 1999 by Ann M. Martin
Cover art by Hodges Soileau
All rights reserved. Published by Scholastic Inc. SCHOLASTIC, THE BABY-SITTERS CLUB, and associated logos are trademarks and/or registered trademarks of Scholastic Inc.
The publisher does not have any control over and does not assume any responsibility for author or third-party websites or their content.
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereafter invented, without the express written permission of the publisher. For information regarding permission, write to Scholastic Inc., Attention: Permissions Department, 557 Broadway, New York, NY 10012.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
First edition, May 1999
e-ISBN 978-0-545-87492-2
The Fire at Mary Anne's House Page 9