The Cruel World
Page 24
“You think West doesn’t like you?” He purses his lips, turning to study me.
“I know he doesn’t.” I shake my head.
“Somehow I doubt that. With the chemistry between the two of you…” His voice trails off as he blows out a breath.
My cheeks grow warm. “We’ve shared a few kisses. I think the chemistry is just physical, at least on West’s side.”
I’m the one who is left lying awake at night trying to ignore how my heart races when I’m around him. Constantly, I have to force myself not to daydream of a future where we’re together and happy—it’s not going to happen. Daydreaming about it will only make things worse when he inevitably rejects me.
Rook laughs, rubbing at the scruff on his jaw. “Wow. You two are complete idiots, but I’m going to have fun watching you guys figure out that you’re head over heels for one another.”
I roll my eyes again.
He is wrong. I know that. But there is no point in arguing.
“Princess,” West growls.
As I start to look up, I trip over the root of a tree. Rook grabs onto my arm, catching me before I face plant onto the ground.
“We should stop for the night.” West’s voice is suddenly much softer than it was moments ago.
“Why did you yell at me?” I ask.
He raises an eyebrow. “Because we had a deal—no flirting with Rook. Don’t make me separate the two of you.”
“Constant entertainment,” Rook mumbles under his breath.
I glare at him.
“What’s going on?” Alek asks, walking up behind us.
“We’re stopping for the night,” West says. “It’s getting too dark to see anything anyway. The last thing we need is Roxy tripping over a stick and breaking something.”
I probably should be offended by what he’s saying, but I did just trip over a root.
“Are you sure?” Rook asks. “I don’t like the idea of stopping.”
West crosses his arms over his chest. “I’m the leader. I say we stop. If you’ve got a problem with it, take it up with Jensen when we get back. None of us will be any good to Cole if we keep going when we’re tired.”
“He’s right.” Alek looks at Rook. “I know you want to keep going because of Cole, but we need to rest for the night.”
Rook sighs. “Fine.”
I don’t blame Rook for being upset. To be honest, I don’t want to stop either, but West is the leader, not me. He is the one who has to make the tough decisions. He’s good at what he does, so I won’t defy him.
We all get our sleeping bags from our backpacks and begin to roll them out. Rook starts to come over by me, but West nudges him over, putting his own sleeping bag beside me. I see Rook smirk from behind him, but I ignore him.
Rook thinks that West wanting to be by me means that he likes me—it doesn’t. He just worries about me because I’m still new to the team. He wants to look out for me. I can respect that.
We all sit down and eat protein bars, which do not taste good, and then we get to sleep. It’s so dark by the time we lie down that I know that West made the right call. There is no way we would’ve been able to continue on further.
As I am drifting off to sleep, I feel something heavy drape over my stomach, but I’m too tired to open my eyes and see what it is.
Tuesday, December 19
I can’t break my number one rule.
We get up the next morning and leave before the sun has fully risen. We’re all eager to get to the gas station closest to the house so we can call for help.
Rook is worried—I can see it on his face. He’s not the carefree guy that I’ve gotten to know. I can’t blame him for being worried, I’d be worried sick if it were one of my teammates. He must be going crazy with worry.
I wish I knew how Cole was doing. I imagine he’s awake now and no doubt yelling at Jensen for making him stay in bed. It would be a sight to see—and it would ease my nerves if I could see it.
West paces beside me. I see him glance over at me every once in a while, which makes my heart flutter.
I shouldn’t be thinking about West like this, especially not while we’re on our way to get help for an injured Royal. But I can’t help how I feel.
The sun starts to rise over the horizon, capturing my attention. The sky is a beautiful shade of pink, orange, and yellow. It’s not quite the same as watching the sun rise over the ocean, but it’s still nice.
I sigh, wishing we were back home right now. We’d probably be running on the beach right about now, watching the sunrise. That would be nice. Instead, we’re stuck in the middle of the woods.
Why do we always get in these kinds of situations?
“You okay?” West looks over at me.
I nod. “Yeah, just homesick.”
“Same,” he grunts. “I never thought I’d miss that tiny condo, but I do. I’d take that over this any day.”
I would too.
The condo really isn’t that bad. Yes, it’s small, but it’s cozy too. It’s become my home. As long as the five of us are getting along, it’s not so bad. When we fight… well, I don’t think it would matter if we were in a two-bedroom condo or a three-story mansion. It wouldn’t be big enough to get away from the guys.
West reaches a hand over and grabs onto my hand.
I look at him, raising an eyebrow.
He shrugs. “So you don’t fall off a cliff.”
I roll my eyes.
We’re not even close to a cliff.
I glance over my shoulder and see Rook and Alek walking a ways back from us. Rook smirks when he sees that West and I are holding hands. It’s because he thinks he’s right.
I turn back forward, but I do look over at West. I catch him watching me, but he turns forward when I look.
Part of me wonders if maybe Rook is right. Maybe West does feel the same way about me as I do about him. I want it to be so. But how could he feel the same? West is… incredible. And I’m… average. Somehow, I became a Royal, but that was pure luck.
But what if West did feel the same? Could we make it work?
The thought is almost laughable. If West felt the same, how could we even get along if we were dating? The two of us fight too much. He’d probably end up breaking up with me and I’d have my heart broken. How could I stay on a team with a guy who broke my heart? It would be… complicated.
No, I can’t break my number one rule. I won’t date a teammate. Not even West.
My chest clenches at the thought.
I know myself better than that. If West asked me to be his girlfriend, I would throw out all common sense. I would say yes. I feel too strongly about him to say no.
Uh, I’m such an idiot.
Being a Royal means everything to me. Dating West could potentially ruin everything. But I’d still do it because I would need to know.
I glance over at him again and see that he’s also watching me.
Would I ever take the chance and tell him how I feel? I want to say yes. I’m brave—I’m a Spy School agent, a Royal. But while jumping out of an airplane is easy, telling the guy I’m in love with how I feel? That’s terrifying. So, I will keep my mouth shut and just obsess over him from a distance.
“What are you thinking about so hard?” West asks.
My cheeks grow warm and I look forward again. I’m scared he’ll be able to know what I’m thinking just by looking at me, but how could he?
“Nothing,” I answer quickly, then decide to change the subject. “How much further do you think the gas station is?”
He squints his eyes. “Probably about three or four more hours. When we get closer, we’ll probably switch to running to get there faster. I’m really worried about Cole.”
“Me too.” I frown at the mention of our injured rival. “Part of me wishes I had stayed there, just so I could know if he’s okay.”
West shakes his head. “Nuh-uh. You’re sticking with me, Princess. I’m never letting you out of my sight.”
It still blows my mind when I think about the fact that he is first generation Spy School. I trained for this my whole life. West just happened to stumble into it and he’s such a natural—he’s way better at this than I could ever dream to be.
West squeezes my hand, so I look over at him. “You’ve got that look of concentration again.”
I grin. “Just thinking about how you’re first generation Spy School and you’re so good at all of this. You make me look bad.”
He snorts. “Yeah, right, Princess. This was bred into you. You always just know what to do. Me? I have to work twice as hard as everybody else to be this good.”
I disagree with that, but I won’t say it out loud. West does work hard, I know that.
“You just get into your own head too much,” West says. “You listen to the things your mom says and you believe them.”
I chew on the side of my lip. “How could I not believe them? I’ve heard them my whole life. And she’s, you know,” I shrug one shoulder, “a Villareal. My dad took her name when he married her because she didn’t want to give it up.”
West’s lips turn up in each corner. “I’m just imagining the look on your mom’s face when she realizes you aren’t going to do the same when you get married.”
I raise an eyebrow. “Who says I won’t keep my last name?”
He gives me a pointed look. “Don’t make me prove you wrong, Princess.”
“How would you even do that?” I ask. “It’s not like I plan on getting married anytime soon. I’m single, in case you didn’t notice.”
He chuckles. “I notice everything about you.”
My heart skips a beat.
I clear my throat, desperate to change the subject. “What about your last name? Do you really want to keep the last name your parents gave you?”
“I didn’t. I took the last name of the guy who trained me.” West ducks under a low hanging tree limb. “I didn’t want anything to do with my parents and their legacy.”
I don’t blame him.
“You’re right,” I tell him.
“I usually am, but about what this time?”
I roll my eyes at his arrogance. “Just about my last name. I don’t want to be a Villareal forever.”
“Trust me, Princess, you won’t be.” He squeezes my hand again, pulling me along with him as we hike through the woods.
I wonder what he meant by that, but I’m too nervous to ask him to elaborate.
Why does West Newman make my heart race like nobody else?
I have it bad for this complicated boy. But the thought doesn’t seem as scary now as it once did.
Royals stick together.
When we’re about fifteen miles away from the gas station, we decide to run the rest of the way. Thankfully, it’s a cooler day, so it’s not too hot as we make our way there through the woods. I’m just ready to get there, ready to get help for Cole, and ready to go home. I want to take a long, hot shower, eat some hot food, and sleep in my own bed.
Sleeping on the ground in the woods is never my idea of a good time. I’m always worried I’ll be mauled by a bear in my sleep. At least we have guns on this trip, which is a good change from when we were dropped off in the woods in California.
When we reach the main road, all of us pick up our pace as we run toward the gas station. The road is a small, two-lane road. There aren’t even lane markers. It’s barely big enough for two cars to pass by one another. It’s no surprise that we don’t see any cars on our way there.
I spot the sign that states the gas prices ahead and I sigh in relief. We’re almost there. We’ve almost got help for Cole. Not much longer now.
West comes to a sudden and abrupt stop. I wonder why for only a second when I see it—the gas station windows are boarded up and there is a huge closed sign on the door. The payphone that once stood outside is in shambles and the place looks like it’s been closed down for ages.
I turn to look at West, noting that Alek and Rook do the same.
West runs his hands over his face, letting out a breath. “Does anybody know where the next closest gas station is?”
We all look between each other, shaking our heads.
I now realize that we should’ve taken the time to study the map more carefully. We were so focused on this one gas station, we didn’t consider that it could possibly be closed down.
The map is framed and put up inside the kitchen of the house. It’s attached to the wall, and I think it’s done that way for a reason. If we had the map now, we’d know where to go. But when Michael Sinclair drops agents off there, it’s to make them better—stronger. We have learned a lesson from this, but the problem is… Cole doesn’t have time for us go back. He could be seriously hurt.
“What do we do?” Rook rubs at the back of his neck. “We can’t turn back.”
“No, we can’t.” West sighs. “We don’t even have enough supplies.”
He’s right.
Our pack was just enough to get us here. We don’t have any more food, I’m almost out of water, and I imagine everybody else is too. I’m exhausted from running. My legs are literally shaking from walking all afternoon, morning, and then running this afternoon. The only reason I’m still on my feet is because I’m motivated to get help for Cole.
“We have to keep going.” West stands up straighter. “I know that we’re tired and hungry, but Cole is a Royal and we are doing this for him. We will persevere and push through for our wounded teammate. It doesn’t matter that he’s our rival. Royals stick together no matter what.”
His words are all the motivation I need. I push my backpack further up on my sore shoulders. “Let’s do this.”
Alek grins. “I’ve got a little left in me.”
Rook motions his hand toward West. “Lead the way.”
West pushes forward, walking down the road. None of us knows where this road leads, but it doesn’t matter. We have to keep going and we have to keep pushing. It’s for Cole.
I can ignore the fact that my stomach is growling. I can push past the fact that my mouth is dry. I will do everything that I can for Cole because I know he would do the same for me.
West is right, Royals do stick together.
Maybe it was good for Michael Sinclair to send us here. I doubt any of us will be the same after this. I know I won’t be. If anything like this happens again, I’ll be better prepared.
I glance over at West as we walk and I see that he’s frowning. I know he blames himself for this. He’s our team leader and he feels like he shoulders all the blame, but we’re all at fault here.
“You did the right thing,” I tell him, trying to make him feel better.
“If I did the right thing, I’d know what to do right now. Instead, we’re just walking in a random direction, hoping to find something.” He motions his arms around. “Look at where we are, Princess. We’re in the middle of nowhere. How are we supposed to happen across anything out here?”
I shrug. “I don’t know, but you’ll think of something. You always do.”
“Thank you for your faith in me. I hope it’s not misplaced,” he says.
But how could it be misplaced? West has gotten me through so much. I don’t doubt for a second that he’ll get us through this too.
No matter what, Royals get things done. It’s why we’re Royals.
Finally catching a break.
It’s been just over an hour since we left the gas station. I’ve finished the last of my water and I desperately need more. I keep hoping we’ll come across a stream or something so we can filter some water to drink, but there hasn’t been anything.
I’m starting to get discouraged. I do trust West, but this is so frustrating. I just want to get help for Cole.
> Why does it feel like the world is just against us? Anything that can go wrong inevitably will.
West comes to a stop, so the rest of us stop along with him. My body sways a little as my head spins. I really don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to keep going.
“Do you guys hear that?” West cocks his head to the side.
“It’s a car!” Rook takes off running.
A car?
I run after him, alongside Alek and West. Knowing that somebody is nearby is enough to give me the strength I need. This is almost over. Finally, after everything we’ve been through, we’re catching a break.
Rook reaches the vehicle first and basically jumps in front of it.
It’s an old, Ford pickup. It has to be at least sixty years old—the kind that is basically indestructible. The fact that it still runs is nothing short of a miracle. I wouldn’t be jumping out in front of a truck like that, but Rook has no concern for his own safety. He only cares about getting help for his teammate. The truck comes to a squeaky stop.
A young guy gets out of the truck and the rest of us run to meet him.
“Thank God,” Rook says, sounding out of breath.
“Are you guys all right?” The guy asks.
The guy, who appears to be in his early twenties, looks between the four of us. I’m sure that we must look like a mess to him, covered in dirt from our trek through the woods.
West steps forward to talk to the guy. “We were camping a ways up the road when our friend got hurt. It’s pretty serious. We left a few of our friends with him, but he needs help. We found the gas station, but our friend doesn’t have time for us to keep looking. Can we use your phone?”
The guy nods, pulling his phone from his pocket, handing it to West. West grabs it and calls for help right away.
“That gas station has been shut down for years—since I was a kid,” the guy tells us.
“Our map must be old.” Rook frowns.
No kidding.
“Where are you guys from?” He asks. I still don’t know his name.