Kage

by Tara A. Devlin

  “No police,” she said. “There’s nothing they can do. There’s nothing I can do.” Her shoulders slumped and she fell to her knees. There were tears in her eyes.

  “Hey, hey! Come on! I don’t know what’s going on, but it can’t be that bad.”

  The bento box in my own bag had burst open and gone everywhere. Lovely. There went dinner.

  The woman clung to her bag like a safety net.

  “Look, why don’t you come and stay at my place for the night?” The words escaped of their own volition before I realised I was even thinking them. What the hell, brain? Inviting strange women into our home? I never agreed to this. This is something we should discuss first! But she didn’t reply. She didn’t move. She sat in the dark; crumpled, wet, and hugging her bag.

  “Come on.” I held a hand out to her. “At the very least, let’s get you some dry clothes.” My skin had already broken out in goosebumps, and as a cool breeze blew through, it didn’t help.

  “Can you help me?” She looked up. Her eyes glimmered. I swallowed. There was no way I could refuse her.

  “Let’s go.”

  5

  I gave Aya a towel and directed her to the bathroom. “I’m sorry for the state of my apartment. I wasn’t expecting guests. It’s not usually this dirty.” It was a lie. It was always this dirty. But she didn’t need to know that. She smiled and took the towel. I went to close the door behind her, but her hand shot out.

  “Leave it open. Please.”

  I gaped like a fish out of water for a few seconds before forcing it into a grin. “Sure. Of course. No worries. I’ll be on the couch if you need anything.” I felt stupid the instant I said it. What would she need in the shower that I could help her with? I shooed the strange sensations spreading throughout my belly away and sat on the couch. I stared at the wall. A lovely wall. A lovely, blank wall that wasn’t a wet woman removing her clothes in my bathroom that very second. Look at that flatness. Such beige. Incredible craftsmanship on that paint job. Whoever did that deserved a raise.

  The feelings confused me. A lot of things confused me. The shower turned on and I allowed myself to relax into the couch. Part of me hoped it would swallow me whole. Another part of me, though, an entirely new part, was fighting its way to the surface.

  Aya was beautiful. There was no denying that. But the feelings that were stirring inside me were new and not feelings I’d ever had before. What was I supposed to do with them? The woman was a stranger, and more than that, she was clearly in trouble. She was struggling with something. Someone was following her, but she didn’t want to go to the police.

  I pushed myself off the couch and started digging through the fridge. There wasn’t much, but I could perhaps scrape together some rice and soup for dinner at the very least. Cooking was fine. I sucked at cooking and there was a good chance I would burn the rice and serve cold soup, but it would keep my mind off things.

  I turned the rice cooker on and stared at the roof, trying not to listen to the sounds of the shower through the open door. Her bag, also drenched, sat by the bathroom door. I walked over towards it.

  “Do you want some rice?” I called through the gap in the door. I found a smudge on the ground to stare at and focused on it, giving it life and creating a story for how it came to be so neither my eyes nor brain started to drift. The water stopped.

  “Sorry?”

  Aya was standing in the doorway, a towel wrapped around her body and water dripping all over the floor.

  “Oh my.” I spun and faced the other wall. I was acting like a 12-year-old boy despite the fact I was a 23-year-old woman. “Um. Rice. Do you want some? Rice, that is. Just rice. No, soup. I have soup. Do you want? Rice. Soup.” The words tumbled out of my mouth like spaghetti.

  Aya smiled. “Sure.”

  “Cool. I’ll get right on that then.” I ran for the kitchen without looking at her. She joined me a few minutes later, wearing some of my old clothes and drying her hair.

  “I’m sorry about… well, everything.” She pulled at my shirt and gave a small, pained grin.

  “No, don’t worry about it. I haven’t worn that in years, anyway. Not that it’s old or smelly! At least, I hope it’s not smelly. It’s not smelly, is it?”

  Aya sniffed it. “A little smelly.”

  “Oh god, I’m sorry. I can get you something else if you-”

  She shook her head. “The rice smells good.”

  Water bubbled in the rice cooker. “Keep that in mind. I haven’t had enough time to burn it yet.”

  She smiled and sat on the couch. I took a deep breath and joined her. I wanted to ask her about earlier. About who was following her, but I didn’t want to push her either.

  “So…” As always, I was an amazing conversationalist. “You seemed surprised earlier when I said Shiraishi. Have you been here before?”

  Her face turned to stone. “My brother has a house here.”

  “Oh, you have a brother?”

  She nodded. I waited for her to expand but nothing came.

  “I see. Uh, what does he do?”

  “He’s an executive officer for a financial company.”

  “Oh. That sounds… difficult. The pay must be good though!” I smiled, but Aya didn’t return the favour. “Do you… see him often?”

  “I try not to.”

  “Ah.” Okay then. Good start to the conversation. “So, where are you from?”

  “I live in Shobara with my father. My brother is too busy to care for him, so I look after him.”

  “Ah, one of my cousins lives in Shobara! It’s a nice area. But it’s a bit of a walk from there to here. How did you end up…” I trailed off. Her eyes narrowed and she clenched her jaw. “You said someone was following you. That they brought you here. What do you mean? Were you drugged? Kidnapped? Are you really sure you don’t want to go to the police?”

  She shook her head and drew her knees up to her chest.

  “Not someone. Something. That shadow.”

  The image of it standing on the other side of the road, watching us, flashed through my mind. It stood as tall as a man, but in the darkness, it was difficult to see who, or what, it was exactly.

  “It’s been following me around for as long as I can remember. It’s always there. Somewhere. Watching me. Waiting. Sometimes I wake up and I don’t know where I am. Not just during the night, but during the day as well.”

  “You mean, like today?”

  She nodded. “I don’t know what it wants, but it’s always there. Haunting me. Ruining my life.”

  “How?” I couldn’t stop the words. I didn’t believe she was actually being haunted by a shadow, but she showed no signs that she was making it up either. Not that I was one to tell if someone was lying. My social skills were up there with my mathematic skills. Non-existent.

  But she shook her head and buried her face in her knees. I reached a hand out and then pulled it back.

  “You say it’s a shadow… What do you mean by that exactly?”

  “You saw it, didn’t you?” She looked up at me. There were no tears in her eyes. There wasn’t even sadness, not anymore. Just resignation. I knew that look well. It was the same face I looked at in the mirror every morning. Or rather, the face I tried to avoid looking at in the mirror every morning.

  “Well, yeah, I saw something. But it was dark out. It could have just been someone passing by.”

  “You can believe what you want. But I’ve seen it enough times during my life to know what it is. It’s not human. It wants something from me. I just don’t know what yet.”

  “It wants something?” I was doing my best to keep up with her, but I was struggling to understand.

  “Why else would it still be haunting me? There’s something it wants that it doesn’t have yet. Maybe it can’t get it yet. I don’t know. I just…” She sighed. “I want it to end.”

  The rice machine beeped and I jumped on the spot. “Shit. Um. Don’t go anywhere. Unless you want burnt rice. I can do
that, trust me. But um. Rice. Don’t go…” I stood up and ran to the rice. I turned the kettle on for the soup and ran a hand through my hair. My mother believed in the supernatural, but my father was a sceptic. She always said I took after him, and while parts of it were true, I didn’t know what to believe. I’d never seen a ghost before. I’d never experienced anything spooky, other than the sight of my bills as they came in each month, growing progressively redder and angrier. But there was no denying that there were stories out there that couldn’t be explained. Or maybe they could be, and we just didn’t know how to yet.

  “How much rice do you want?”

  “I’m not very hungry. Thank you.”

  I scooped out enough to half fill the bowl and grabbed two instant packets of miso soup. Living the high life. I sure knew how to entertain a person.

  “I’m sorry I don’t have… well, anything else.”

  “It’s fine. Really. Thank you.”

  Maybe the ground would open up and swallow me. Or perhaps some of the ants that were making their way across the floor could pick me up and carry me away. I felt about as big as them, but at least they had consistent work and a proper place in society.

  I poured the water over the instant miso and brought her the rice. She ate in silence, and I turned the TV on to avoid the growing feeling of dread inside me. Did I invite a nutcase into my home? Was she actually being stalked by a person? Or was there something out there that she couldn’t explain. Something truly haunting her. Waiting for something it wanted from her.

  But something worried me even more than that. The part of me that didn’t care either way. Because the way she made my heart jump when she looked at me was exhilarating. I was already too far gone. I was falling for this stranger I’d just met, and it was like nothing I’d ever felt before.

  6

  A loud noise woke me from my dreams and I fell to the floor with a thud. I grabbed my elbow as pain shot through it and looked around, trying to orient myself. I was in my apartment. I was on the ground next to the couch. Someone was in my bed… Someone was in my bed!

  Aya.

  It was just Aya.

  But while Aya was asleep in my bed, she was also mumbling something loud enough to draw me from my slumber. I stood up and walked over to the edge of the bed.

  “Aya,” I called out. She continued mumbling. I couldn’t make out what she was saying. It didn’t sound like any language I knew. “Aya!” No response. I tugged on the blanket. Nothing.

  “Aya!” I tried calling out a little louder, but she was tossing and turning and mumbling some strange sounds that made no sense. Was that what I looked like when I had nightmares?

  I reached over and tapped her on the shoulder a few times. Nothing. I grabbed her and shook her instead. Still nothing. I climbed onto the bed and grabbed both shoulders.

  “Aya! Wake up!”

  But no matter how hard I shook her, she refused to wake up. I looked around the room for something that might help. A glass of water to the face? A bit rude, sure, and I didn’t exactly want to wet the bed, but if it brought her out of it, it would be worth it.

  I ran to the kitchen and turned the tap on.

  “No!” Aya screamed from the bed. “Daddy, no!”

  Daddy, no? I stuck my head around the corner. There was nothing there. I filled the glass and ran back.

  The water slipped from my hand.

  It was there. The shadow was right there, in the corner of the room. It was stuck to the walls like a fly. Not moving. Not doing anything. It was just there. Watching Aya on my bed. It turned to me as the glass shattered and sprayed my feet with water. I couldn’t say a word. I couldn’t move. I was bolted to the ground and my entire body screamed that it wanted to escape, but I couldn’t comply.

  “W-who are you?” My voice trembled. My hand was holding the air where the glass once was. I tightened the fist, unable to even blink. If I blinked, the shadow might disappear. Or worse, still be there, maybe this time even closer.

  Aya continued mumbling, but there were more sounds I could recognise as words. “No.” “Stop.” “Please don’t.” “Why?” Was she talking to it? Or was she in a nightmare from which she couldn’t escape? A nightmare brought on by the darkness lurking in the corner of the room.

  A priest. I need a Shinto priest. Cover the room in talismans. Salt the earth. It would be fine. They dealt with this type of thing all the time. Unless it was a person. Then we could just call the police. We could call the police if the thing didn’t murder us first.

  “What do you want?” I brought my arm down by my side. It turned to look at Aya again. “You stay away from her!” I grabbed the nearest thing I could find. A book on how the pyramids of ancient Egypt were built. I threw it at the darkness and it tumbled to the floor. Did it hit it? Or did it hit the wall? I couldn’t tell. It was too dark.

  “Get out!” I grabbed a cushion and threw it. “Get out of my house! Leave her alone!” I grabbed whatever I could get my hands on and hurled them at the corner of the room. It was impossible to tell if I was hitting anything, but it was enough to free myself from the fear that had locked my body in place. I ran for the bed. I grabbed Aya and started shaking her again.

  “Aya! Wake up!” It was still there, lurking in the corner behind me. “Go away! Leave her alone! What did she ever do to you?”

  I ran for the darkness. I was so scared that I couldn’t stop myself. I wanted it gone. I wanted the fear gone. I wanted everything to end. If that was the way it was going to end, well, there could be worse ways to go than trying to protect someone. I was still half-asleep and not thinking right. I moved on instinct and I hit the wall, hard. I landed on my backside and pain exploded through my tailbone. I laughed. There was nothing there. There was never anything there. I was just imagining things in my sleep haze.

  But as I turned, the darkness was standing over the bed. It was looming over Aya as she twisted and turned. A hand was reaching down for her. At least, it looked like a hand. I ran and jumped on the bed, throwing myself over her.

  “Leave her alone!”

  Hands gripped my shoulders. My heart beat in my throat like a jackhammer and I flailed.

  “Megu! Megu, stop!”

  It was Aya. I sat up and looked around the room. We were alone. Aya was beneath me, looking at me with confused eyes. Scared eyes. I rolled off her and swallowed.

  “I saw… there was… where did it…”

  Aya got out of bed and grabbed my arm. “Did you see it? It was here?”

  “I don’t know what I-” I was scared and confused and the clock on my bedside table flashed 2:30 a.m. I had to go to work in a few hours for the magazine shipment. “What the hell is going on?”

  “It found me. It always finds me. I was stupid to think it wouldn’t find me here, even for just one night.” She pulled the curtain back on the window and peered outside. I didn’t know what to say.

  “It doesn’t matter where I go. It’ll always find me.”

  7

  The clock flashed 4 a.m. I had to be at work before 4:30 to receive the magazine shipments. I sighed.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to go to the police?”

  Aya was standing by the window, looking outside. Neither of us had been able to sleep. For the last hour and a half she just stood there, looking at the street. I couldn’t think of anything to say, so I just watched her. Awkward silence filled the air. Silence I wished I could break with the right words to make her feel better. To make me feel better. But all I could do was sit on the couch and stare at the wall, trying my best not to think about the shadow that had invaded my house.

  “No.” She didn’t say anything else. I wasn’t sure the police would be able to do much either, to be honest. What was I supposed to tell them? Hey, so, I saw this shadow in my apartment last night. Yeah, the stuff I threw at it just went right through it. Then it tried to strangle this woman in my bed. The woman? Oh, I don’t know who she is either, no.

  It probab
ly wouldn’t go down so well.

  “I need to get to work,” I said, standing up. Aya turned to look at me and then shifted her gaze back outside.

  “Okay.”

  “I can… stay here if you want?” I wanted with all my might for her to say yes. Please stay. I need you.

  “No, you should go to work.”

  The words stung more than I thought.

  “Do you… need anything? There’s not much food here. I mean, you’re welcome to stay here today, of course. You don’t have to go anywhere, I’m not gonna kick you out or anything like that.”

  She gave a smile that barely touched her cheeks. Her eyes were emotionless. “Thank you. And I’m fine. I’ll survive.”

  “Well, if you need anything, anything at all, this is my phone number.” I wrote down the number for my cell. I didn’t have a home phone, but there was a public phone outside. Aya didn’t appear to have a cell phone on her. “And this is the number for the store.” I wrote down the convenience store’s public number underneath it. The boss would likely be the one to answer it, but it was better than nothing in an emergency. Although, if it was an emergency, I didn’t know what good I would be. I didn’t live terribly far from work, but I didn’t live close by either.

  “Thank you,” she said again.

  “I should be back this afternoon. I guess.” I paused. “I hope. Look, uh, just give me a call if anything happens, okay? Or if you see…” My voice trailed off. “Just give me a call. And I promise I’ll bring something nicer home for dinner.” The empty rice bowls were sitting in the sink. Not the best way to entertain a guest, I knew, but in my defence, I wasn’t exactly expecting her.

  “I’ll be fine.” Again that fake smile. I grabbed my bag and keys and waited by the door. What was I supposed to do in a situation like this? What was the right thing to say?

  “I’ll be… back later… and going now… and see you later… yeah…” I closed the door behind me and threw my head back against it. Smooth. I took a deep breath and made my way towards the stairs.