Tempted by Love: Jack Jock Steele (The Steeles at Silver Island Book 1)

by Melissa Foster

  “You fucking killed her!” Archer fumed, fists flying.

  Jock dodged the hit, and Levi stepped up, but Jock waved him off, never taking his eyes off Archer. “It should’ve been me driving. We both know that.”

  Archer swung again, and Jock blocked his punch, but he didn’t hit back. He wouldn’t. “Keep going. At least you fucking see me now.”

  “I hate you,” Archer spat. He came at Jock, head down, and Jock burst forward. They slammed into each other like linebackers, legs planted in the ground, two immovable mountains.

  “I lost her, too, man,” Jock gritted out. “I despise myself for it.”

  “You promised to look after her!” Archer punched him in the ribs. Jock reeled sideways, and Archer hit him again. “You didn’t even respect her enough to marry her!”

  Jock stumbled back and shouted, “Because she loved you, man. She didn’t want me.”

  “Bullshit.” Archer came at him, fists flying again.

  Jock blocked a hit and had to swing back, connecting with Archer’s jaw, sending his brother stumbling backward. Jock closed the distance between them, shouting, “She was in love with you!”

  Archer bared his teeth. “Liar!”

  He ran toward Jock, and Jock shouted, “Think, Archer! She texted you morning, noon, and night.” Archer’s shoulder slammed into him again, knocking the wind out of him. But Jock was not backing down. He dragged air into his lungs and said, “She hung out with you at the marina when we came to visit. It was always you! She loved you!”

  Archer froze, nostrils flaring, hands fisted.

  “It’s true, man. We were going to come home and tell you the next day. I was going to back off, let you two raise my son if you were in love with her.” Tears burned Jock’s eyes, memories pummeling him.

  Archer looked away, shaking his head. “No. She loved you.”

  “She loved the baby. We both did. Think about it, man. We were just having fun when she got pregnant,” Jock said, moving into Archer’s line of sight. He leaned his hands on his thighs, sucking air into his lungs. “Were you in love with her?”

  Archer closed his eyes, teeth gritted.

  “Archer, get that shit out of your head. We both lost her. I lost my baby, man. I know how much it hurts. I know how hate eats us alive and makes us want to hate everything around us. I couldn’t fucking stand to look at myself in the mirror for a year, and for years after that, I hated the person I saw in that mirror. But we’ve already lost a decade. It’s time to get it all out on the table.” Holding his brother’s confused and angry stare, he said, “Did you love her?”

  Archer looked down, shaking his head. “As a friend. A fucking best friend. Not as…No.” He turned sorrowful eyes on Jock and said, “I didn’t know.”

  “That’s on me. I should have told you sooner, but you wouldn’t even look at me.” Jock felt like his heart was being torn out all over again, but they had to get this out, so he forced the words, and they tore from his lungs like shards of glass. “When you said I was dead to you, I didn’t blame you for it. I wished it had been me driving that fucking car.”

  Archer stared him down, chest heaving. “I hated you, but I hated myself even more.” His fists opened and closed as he paced. “I missed her so damn much. I missed her laugh, her bullshit texts at three in the morning when she couldn’t sleep. She was always there, from the time we were kids, and then she was gone. I hated myself for wanting her to live because that would mean I’d have lost you. But I didn’t want that, either. I wanted you all to have never gotten into that fucking car.”

  “I know,” Jock said.

  “Do you?” Archer challenged. “How can you fucking know how guilty I’ve felt for all these years? You’re my brother, my blood. My fucking twin. I can’t…” He turned away.

  “That’s how I know. Because you’re my twin. I didn’t let myself know that until yesterday. Dad said something and it made me realize that maybe you don’t really want me dead. But don’t turn it inward, Archer,” Jock demanded. “Hit me. Get it out of your system before it kills the best part of you.”

  Archer shook his fist at him and shouted, “You should have just married her.”

  “I couldn’t marry her, and she couldn’t marry me.”

  “But I didn’t love her like that,” Archer said, angry and pleading at once, his shoulders slumped in defeat. “If she’d told me, maybe then you two could have—”

  “No, Archer. The feelings weren’t there. We tried. We thought they’d develop, but they didn’t. And then, at the restaurant that last night, she told me she was in love with you and she thought she always had been.”

  “Well, fuck!” His face contorted. “So what was the plan? She’d come here and tell me, and I’d be a dick and not love her back? Then what would she be left with?”

  Jock softened his tone and said, “Two guys who would’ve stood by her and loved her like family. We would have raised Liam together, not as husband and wife, but as two people who had created a child together. I respected the hell out of her, Archer. She could have aborted the baby and I would have never known. But she didn’t, because she respected me, too.”

  Tears slipped down Archer’s cheeks. “Why did she have to love me? I’m a dick. I couldn’t even be there for you when you lost your baby. I fucking hate myself for that, too.”

  “Don’t hate yourself, Archer. You were grieving the woman you knew. You had no room to grieve the nephew you’d never met. You’re not a dick. You’re pissed off. And you weren’t a dick before she died. You were a twenty-two-year-old guy having fun, just like I was, and she was the same way. We were all young. We didn’t even know what love was.”

  “But she did,” he said firmly. “She loved me. And what’d she get back?”

  “I get it, Archer. But you can’t allow her feelings for you to ruin the rest of your life. I know this is a lot to handle, but you can’t change how you felt about her, any more than I could. Or for that matter, any more than she could have changed how she felt about us.”

  Archer stared at him, his emotions storming around him. “I can’t…” He shook his head and stalked toward the winery.

  Jock gritted out a curse and hollered after him, “I’m not going to let you hate me anymore, Archer. I love you too damn much to lose more time with you.”

  Archer continued walking, raised his right hand, and flipped him off.

  “I’d say that’s a good sign,” Levi said as he and their father approached.

  Jock huffed out a laugh. He had forgotten Levi was there, and he didn’t know his father had been watching them. “How long have you been standing there, Dad?”

  “Long enough to say I’m proud of both of you.” He pulled Jock into an embrace, and Jock winced. “Let’s go put some ice on that, Rocky.”

  “Nah, I’m good.”

  “Are you?” Levi asked.

  “Yeah, man, I am. We needed that.” He glanced at the house and said, “Please tell me my girls didn’t see us going at it.”

  “Jules sent a group text,” Levi said. “All the girls are with the kids in the rec room. Joey and Hadley are playing. Daphne’s probably a mess, though Jules says Mom is sidetracking her with event talk.”

  All their phones vibrated at once.

  “Probably Jules again,” Levi said, and they pulled out their phones, exchanging confused glances at Archer’s name on the message bubble.

  They opened the texts and laughed at Archer’s message—Stop talking about me, Jockstrap. You’re still an asshole.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  DAPHNE WALKED INTO the bedroom looking for Jock. He’d seemed a little too fine when he’d told everyone what had happened between him and Archer. She knew Jock well enough to realize there was much more to it than We broke the ice. She found him washing his face in the bathroom and leaned against the doorframe, aching at the angry purple bruises forming on his rib cage and the same coloring peeking out from beneath the scruff on his jaw.

  He
lifted his face and smiled. “Hi, angel.” He reached for a towel and patted his face dry.

  “Hey.” She was relieved to see he’d lost some of the shadows that had haunted him. She went to him, trying to read his beautiful, complicated mind. She touched his waist, needing to feel closer. “Are you okay? Do you want to talk?”

  He put his arms around her and pressed his lips to hers. “What I want is to take you and Hadley to see the island, like we planned.”

  “Jock, I know what you said downstairs, but this is just us. What does breaking the ice really mean? Did you bruise his face and ribs, too? Does it mean more fights? Did you talk about anything real? Is anything going to change?”

  “It’s a start, baby. It’s exactly like you said when my mom introduced you to Archer. He sees me now, whereas before he only saw hate—toward me and toward himself. We talked about everything, or at least touched on it. We opened doors that I worried might never open again, and I’m sure we’ll be working through it for a long time. He has a lot of guilt about what he said to me, and that fueled his hatred of himself. That’s a lot to live with, and if anyone understands what that feels like, it’s me. Unfortunately, telling him Kayla was in love with him added to his guilt. He wasn’t in love with her, and he didn’t want to believe it at first. It’s a lot to take in. But now he knows, and he does believe it. The ties that bound years of hurt, anger, and guilt are unraveling, and that’s a lot to process for both of us.”

  “You seem better, but I want you to know you can talk to me, and if you’d rather stay home and go see Archer, or just be with your family this morning, that’s totally fine.”

  Leni, Sutton, Indi, Levi, and Joey had left for the ferry after talking with Jock. His grandmother and his mother were downstairs with Hadley. His father had gone to the winery to see if Archer was there, and Jules had gone to work. Jules made Jock promise they’d stop by to see her before they left on the five o’clock ferry.

  Jock drew Daphne closer, kissing her softly. “Talking with you is what made this possible. I feel freer, and I think Archer does, too. I’d say he and I will probably take baby steps toward a better relationship, but you know I suck at going slow, and Archer is my twin, so…”

  “Does that mean we have more bruises to look forward to, but they’ll happen fast and furious?”

  He grinned. “I have no clue, but I do know it’s a good thing, however it happens. Now, let’s get the heck out of here before I tear off those sexy striped shorts and that tight tank top and show you what island fever is really all about.”

  HALF AN HOUR later, Jock borrowed his parents’ car and took Daphne and Hadley to see Silver Monument, located in the center of the island, with incredible views in every direction. The stately monument resembled a turret from a castle, surrounded by a brick-paved courtyard with iron benches and beautiful trees. A line of people waited to enter and climb to the top of the massive monument.

  Jock held Hadley’s hand and pointed to a park just beyond the monument, saying, “The island Christmas tree is located in Majestic Park, right over there, and the annual holiday festival takes place there a few weeks before Christmas. There’s a Christmas tree lighting and people gather around singing and hanging ornaments on the tree. If the weather cooperates, kids sled ride, and everyone hangs out drinking hot chocolate and eating roasted chestnuts and other treats. It’s really fun. Then every weekend leading up to Christmas, there’s something going on. The marinas have the flotillas, where boaters and fishermen decorate their boats for the Island of Lights Holiday Flotilla and they cruise along the harbor competing for the best decorations. There are horse-drawn sleigh rides down Main Street, and the Silver House has caroling and a big holiday dance.”

  “That sounds wonderful.” Daphne got goose bumps thinking about enjoying all of those things with Jock and Hadley and his family and friends. Maybe they could even have Christmas dinner with both of their families this year. Her heart fluttered at the thought. She was getting ahead of herself, but she could see it all so clearly, it felt real, and she wanted it more than she wanted anything—other than for Jock and Archer’s relationship to continue to heal.

  “It’s really special. I haven’t been since I left for college.” He lifted Hadley into his arms and put his other arm around Daphne, hugging her to his side. “We should come this year. What do you think?”

  “I’d love that.” Daphne gazed up at him.

  “I want this with you and Hadley, Daph. I want to come to the parades and see Hadley on the winery float dressed up as a little bunny.” He kissed Hadley’s cheek and said, “Would you like that, princess? To be in a fancy parade?”

  Hadley nodded.

  “I want that, too,” Daphne said, and this time she didn’t even try to tamp down her imagination as it skipped ahead to seeing Hadley on that float with Gwama and Gwampa, and she even let herself think about bigger dreams. A winery wedding. A sister or brother for Hadley…

  “Want to see where I went to school?” Jock asked, leading them around the monument. “We have three schools that are K through eight on the island, and they all feed into Silver Island High.” He pointed down a road and said, “The high school is five minutes that way. That’s one reason kids here get to know each other so well. It doesn’t matter if you’re from a wealthy family or a family that’s making it paycheck to paycheck. You all end up at the same high school.” He took Daphne’s hand and said, “Come on, I’ll show you.”

  They got back in the car and Jock drove by his high school, showing them where he played sports and telling them about pranks and things he’d done with his friends. There was a new spark in him again, just like there had been last night at the party. Only this time it was even brighter, as if the crack in the ice with Archer had helped him shed more monkeys from his back.

  A little while later, they parked in the center of town and strolled down Main Street, lined with colorful shops and bustling with tourists. OPEN flags waved in the ocean breeze announcing shop entrances, and painted wooden benches offered places to sit and enjoy the sunny day. Window boxes overflowed with summer blooms, and picture windows boasted enticing displays, drawing them in to meander through one cute shop after another. Daphne collected cards and contacts from shop owners so she could more efficiently help Shelley plan the bridal shower. Hadley walked down the sidewalks, but inside the stores, she lifted her arms for Jock to carry her. Daphne worried about his bruised ribs, but he assured her that his little princess would never be too much for him.

  “I want to grab a card from here, too,” Daphne said as she walked into the flower shop.

  “You do realize my mother grew up here and knows everyone, right?” Jock teased.

  Daphne snagged a business card. As they walked out of the shop, she said, “Yes, but I don’t. I want to surprise your mom and put together a helpful list of local shops in case she decides to go bigger and do more events. If she becomes a destination wedding venue, she’ll need these things handy for her event planner to use and to give out to clients. Everyone thinks a venue is just four walls or the property, but it’s so much more than that. She’ll be relied on for everything, and even though she knows the island inside and out and backward, your mom is busy running the winery. A list is something she can give out to alleviate a million questions.”

  He hooked an arm around her as they walked down the sidewalk and kissed her temple. “You’re really something. You know that?”

  “I’m yours. I know that.” She looked at her little girl holding his hand, and a gust of happiness swept through her. “We both are.”

  “Damn right you are.” He leaned in for a kiss, and they continued window-shopping.

  “My house!” Hadley ran to the window of a real estate company and pointed to a picture of a cute two-story cedar-sided house with a white picket fence out front and a deep front porch. Planters overflowing with vibrant pink flowers hung from the porch roof between each of the columns.

  “That’s pretty isn’t it,
baby?” Daphne said.

  “Mine,” Hadley said as if it were a fact, blinking innocently up at them.

  “That’s not ours, honey. We live on Cape Cod, not Silver Island.” A pang of longing struck Daphne, and she tucked it away. “Maybe one day we’ll find something just as cute.”

  “Mine,” Hadley said adamantly. She pressed her tiny hand to the window and grabbed Jock’s hand, putting it on the window, too. “Mine, Dock.”

  “I think she knows who the softy is,” Daphne said.

  Jock laughed.

  “Your daughter has good taste,” a tall brunette said as she came up the sidewalk. “That house is over in the Bluffs. It’s a relatively new and very sought-after development. There are lots of young families there, a great view of the water, and a small park, too. Would you like to come in to get more information about it?”

  “No, thank you,” Daphne said. “We’re just visiting.”

  “Just out of curiosity, what town is that in?” Jock asked.

  “Here. It’s five minutes away,” she said cheerily. “I’m Charmaine Luxe. I work here.” She reached into her purse and handed him a business card.

  “Jock Steele. This is my girlfriend, Daphne.” He put his hand on Hadley’s shoulder and said, “And this is Hadley.”

  “Related to the Top of the Island Steeles?” Charmaine asked.

  “Yes. They’re my parents.”

  “It’s nice to meet you. I’m relatively new to the island, but I know your parents, and of course Jules and Archer.” Charmaine pulled the door open and said, “If you change your mind, give me a call. I’d love to show you around.”

  As the door closed behind Charmaine, Daphne said, “She was nice. Come on, Had, let’s keep walking.”

  Hadley shook her head. “My house!”

  “I have an idea.” Jock went inside and came out with a for-sale flyer for the house. He scooped up Hadley and gave it to her.

  She beamed up at him. “My house is pwetty.”