The Mysteries of Max: Books 31-33

by Nic Saint

  “This is just terrible,” said Marge, shaking her head.

  “Yeah, it is pretty scary,” said Fred. “You suddenly stand to lose your entire business overnight. And we at Kramer Kitchen Kreation may run a successful business, but a million dollars is a lot of money, and would put a serious dent in our profits for the year.”

  “At least this time the criminals didn’t get what they wanted,” said Scarlett, and raised her glass in a salute. “To Vesta Muffin, who once again showed that she is a true neighborhood watch leader, now even expanding into cyberspace!”

  Everyone laughed, except Uncle Alec, who had never been a big fan of the watch.

  “To Vesta,” said the Kitchen King. “Thank you, my dear lady. And I’ll be sure to translate my gratitude into a healthy discount on your kitchen remodel.”

  When dinner was over, and Tex was getting their guests’ coats, Grace Kramer turned to Odelia. “I heard you’ve been in touch with my ex-husband,” she said, a slightly stilted smile on her face.

  “Yeah, their cat had gone missing, and I was lucky enough to find it for them.”

  “Let me give you a piece of advice, Miss Poole. Don’t get involved with Karl. And especially don’t believe a word the man says.”

  “Oh? And why is that?”

  “Did he tell you that he stole from Fred? We both used to work for him, Karl as Fred’s accountant, and me as his secretary. But that was before Fred discovered that Karl had been stealing from him. He should have gone to the police, but Fred is a good man, and he didn’t want to make things difficult for Karl, even though I told him to press charges.”

  “You were still married to Karl when this happened?”

  “I was. The whole business opened my eyes to what kind of man Karl is. I couldn’t stay with him after what I discovered. The stealing, the lying.” She shrugged. “Fred showed me what kind of man I’d married, and that was it. I never looked back, and I’ve never been happier. So please be careful, Miss Poole,” she said as she accepted her coat from Odelia’s dad. “The man talks a good talk, but he’s wicked.”

  And with these words, she strode out in the wake of her husband.

  Chapter 18

  That night, we were all having a good time at cat choir, when suddenly Clarice appeared next to me, seemingly out of nowhere. Clarice has that tendency to simply materialize. I don’t know how she does it, but it’s a most disconcerting experience. First there’s nothing, and then suddenly she’s there. And she can disappear again in just the same way—just like a ghost.

  “I found another dead body, Max,” she announced.

  I did a double-take. “You did what?”

  “Another dead body. I don’t know what it is with this town, but I keep finding dead bodies. First that body that was buried out in the woods, and now this new one.”

  “You found another body in the woods?” I asked, leading her aside where we could talk without being overheard. If there’s one thing that’s disadvantageous about cat choir is that it’s filled with cats, and since cats like to spy and gossip more than anything, there’s nothing that you can discuss without it being all over town within minutes.

  “No, this time I found it at the bottom of an elevator shaft,” said Clarice, who was talking about this dead body as if it was the most natural thing in the world. “I was minding my own business as usual, and I happened to pass this new construction site on Carmel Street. And since these builders usually have nothing better to do than to sit around and eat, I figured I just might take a look at their dumpster—you’d be amazed what you can find in building site dumpsters. I once found an entire lobster there. And so I was hunting around for another precious find when I happened to smell something dead and decaying. And so naturally I went in search of the source of the smell.”

  “Naturally,” I agreed, even though if I smelled something dead and decaying, I’d run a mile. But then that’s me, of course. One of those areas where Clarice and I differ.

  “And that’s when I found him.”

  “Him? So it’s a him?”

  “Yep. Some dead dude, lying at the bottom of an elevator shaft, dead as a dodo.”

  “Can you tell me exactly where you found this dead dude?” I asked dutifully, already figuring out how to reach Odelia and get the ball rolling on a rescue attempt—for in spite of Clarice’s words the man might not be dead yet, and could still be saved.

  Clarice said, “I can do you one better. I’ll take you there. It’s not far from here.”

  “Okay,” I said. “Show us the way, Clarice.”

  And so we set out in Clarice’s wake: me, Dooley, Harriet and Brutus.

  Clarice was right: it was only a ten-minute walk from the park where cat choir likes to engage in its nocturnal activities. And as we looked down into that elevator shaft, which was still under construction, I had to admit she’d been right on the money: this man was indeed very much dead and unfortunately medical assistance would be to no avail.

  I sighed. “A lot of dead people are turning up in our town lately.”

  “Only two dead people,” said Dooley. “Two is not a lot, is it?”

  “Yeah, Max,” said Harriet, “one swallow doesn’t make a summer, and two dead bodies don’t make a massacre.”

  “Good one, babe,” said Brutus with a chuckle.

  “Well, this is where I leave you, guys,” said Clarice. “You’ll take it from here, I trust?”

  “Yeah, thanks, Clarice,” I said.

  “And if you find more dead bodies, please tell us,” said Dooley.

  Clarice smiled. “Rest assured I will, Dooley.”

  “Oh, wait, Clarice,” I said. “You didn’t happen to see anyone else around, did you?”

  “No one. Why?”

  “Well, it looks like this guy accidentally tumbled down this shaft, but you never know. He might also have been pushed.”

  “Oh, I don’t think so,” said Brutus. “This is clearly an accident, Max.”

  “Yeah, obviously,” said Harriet, who was already losing interest in the dead guy now that the novelty had worn off.

  “Max sees murder and mayhem everywhere,” Brutus explained to Clarice. “If he sees a dead body, immediately he assumes there must have been foul play involved. Whereas most people simply die, you know, either of natural causes or by accident.”

  “I’m not saying he didn’t die by accident,” I said. “I’m just trying to cover all my bases.”

  “And a good thing, too,” said Clarice. “But I have to disappoint you, Max. There was no one around when I stumbled upon the guy. So I’ll be seeing you around, yeah?”

  “Take care, Clarice,” I said. “And thank you!” I called after her.

  She held up her tail and made a little acknowledging swish-swish.

  “And now the hard part,” I said. “One of us has to run home and get Odelia out here.”

  “Why one of us?” asked Harriet. “Why can’t we all go home and let Odelia deal with this? Or Chase? It is their job to do this kind of thing, isn’t it? Not ours.”

  “At least one of us has to stay here in case someone shows up,” I explained.

  “Who’ll show up? It’s the middle of the night. Nobody is going to show up.”

  “Oh, I see what he’s getting at,” said Brutus. “Max is thinking that if this was murder, the killer might come back and try to dispose of the body. Isn’t that what you’re thinking, Max?”

  I admitted that I was thinking along those lines, and they both laughed.

  “Oh, Max,” said Harriet when her laughter had expended itself. “You’re too funny. We already told you that this isn’t murder but an accident, so nobody is going to show up and nobody is going to dispose of any bodies.”

  “Still,” I insisted. “I’d feel much better if one of us stayed behind and guarded the body.”

  “Oh, have it your way,” said Harriet with an eyeroll. “You stay behind then, and we’ll go home and get some sleep.”

  “And tell Od
elia, right?” I asked, just to make sure.

  “Of course we’ll tell Odelia,” said Harriet with another eyeroll. “What do you take us for? Noobs?”

  Brutus patted my back, almost causing me to buckle under the onslaught. “You just stick around, Maxie baby,” he said with a grin. “And we’ll take care of everything.”

  And with these words, they took off, still laughing at my expense. “Dooley, are you coming?” Harriet yelled over her shoulder.

  “No, I think I’ll stay here with Max,” Dooley yelled back.

  “Suit yourself!” said Brutus, and off they were.

  For a moment, silence reigned, since I wasn’t talking but thinking about what had happened, and Dooley wasn’t talking but thinking about whatever he was thinking about, and obviously the dead man wasn’t talking since he was dead. Then Dooley said, “I hope they won’t forget to tell Odelia, otherwise we’ll be here all night.”

  “I’m sure they won’t forget,” I said.

  “Do you really think the man was murdered, Max?”

  “I don’t know, Dooley. That’s for the police to decide. But if he was murdered, it’s important that we guard the scene, so nothing gets disturbed.”

  “It’s strange though, isn’t it, Max?”

  “What is, Dooley?”

  “Two dead bodies. What if we keep finding dead bodies from now on, one per night?”

  “I’d say the chances of that happening are very slim indeed.”

  “I hope so. If we find a dead body every night, that’s three hundred and sixty-five bodies a year.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  “How many people are there in Hampton Cove, Max?”

  “Um, I’d say about fifteen thousand.”

  “That means that in just a few years the entire population of Hampton Cove will be extinct, and only us cats will be left if this keeps up.”

  I laughed. “Your math is flawed, Dooley, and the chances of that happening are nil.”

  “But what happens if the whole town dies out, Max? Who’s going to take care of us?”

  “I’m sure that won’t happen, Dooley, and even if it does, there are still people left in the world who’ll be able to take care of us.”

  “But what if all the people in all the towns in all the world suddenly end up at the bottom of a deep hole, Max, or at the bottom of an elevator shaft, who’s going to take care of us then?”

  “Well, I guess then we’ll just have to join Clarice in the woods, and we’ll have to learn to fend for ourselves.”

  “Oh,” he said, ruminating on that unappealing prospect. “Well, let’s hope you’re right, and it doesn’t happen. Cause I don’t think I’d enjoy living with Clarice in the woods and eating from dumpsters.”

  “If all the people in all the towns in all the world are dead, Dooley,” I said, “there won’t be any more dumpsters, and Clarice will have to find her food some other way, and so will we.”

  “Oh, no, Max!” he said, suddenly realizing the awful repercussions of his gloomy post-apocalyptic view, which seemed to come straight from a Stephenie Meyer novel. “That’s terrible!”

  But lucky for me, just then Odelia and Chase arrived and came hurrying over to where we were guarding the dead man, and I didn’t have to speculate anymore on these Walking Dead scenarios of doom!

  Chapter 19

  Odelia looked around the small but cozy little studio. It hadn’t taken them long to find out that the man found at the bottom of the elevator shaft was named Darryl Farmer and that he lived with his girlfriend in a modest apartment in Leighton Heights. She and Chase had gone over there to talk to the girlfriend, and break the bad news to her.

  “I knew this would happen one day,” said the girlfriend, whose name was Lucy Vale. She had long hair done up in dreadlocks, and was very pretty and petite, dressed in a flowing maroon robe. “I told him that if he kept this up, he’d end up dead.”

  “And why is that?” asked Chase, who, like Odelia, was seated on a bean bag and trying to find a comfortable way to sit, which unfortunately was quite impossible. The entire studio was decorated in hobo chic style, with portraits of dead poets adorning the walls, and plenty of symbols for weed. The studio smelled of weed, too—a pervasive smell.

  “Darryl was a raver and a DJ. It was what he lived for. And smoking weed and popping pills was part of the deal, unfortunately. He must have been baked out of his mind when he stumbled down that shaft.” She gave Chase a curious look. “You’re sure he was alone?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “He wasn’t with some girl?”

  “You mean…”

  “Darryl was something of a playboy, never happy to stick with one girl.”

  “You’re saying he was unfaithful to you?” asked Odelia.

  Lucy nodded, her fingers twitching as if holding a cigarette. “It was the reason I kicked him out last month.”

  “Oh, so you weren’t a couple anymore?”

  “No, I caught him cheating on me with some pink-haired teenager. It wouldn’t surprise me if she wasn’t even of age.”

  Odelia cut a quick glance to her husband. “Do you happen to remember her name?”

  “Um… Suzy something?”

  “Suzy Bunyon?”

  “Could be. I didn’t pay attention. She wasn’t the only one, by the way. Darryl would find himself a new girl every week. He’d hit on anything with a skirt at the raves he liked to attend. In fact that’s where we met. Only he’d convinced me I was the one, and for a while I believed him. But that didn’t last long.” She glanced up at the ceiling. “About six months or so? And then I discovered he’d been cheating on me all this time, his latest conquest this Suzy person, but there had been others, I’m sure.”

  “Is there any reason you can think of why he’d be at a deserted construction site in the middle of the night?” asked Chase.

  “Not really. It wasn’t the kind of place where he’d organize one of his raves, if that’s what you mean.”

  “Where did he organize his raves?”

  “Lately the place to be was the woods just outside Hampton Cove. You probably know where. You head in the direction of Happy Bays and then you turn left just beyond the town sign. We’ve been partying there the last couple of months now. Though mainly Darryl, not me. I have a job, you see. I can’t stay up all night and then expect to be able to work all day. But he was out there every night as far as I know.”

  “The woods, huh,” said Chase, jotting down a note.

  “Yeah, Darryl was an ace DJ. He knew just how to whip a party into a frenzy. That’s what made him so popular with the girls, I guess. I know it’s what made him popular with me,” she added ruefully. “I figured he was some kind of God when we first met.”

  “And why was that?” asked Odelia. “What made him so popular?”

  She shrugged. “At a rave the DJ is God. That’s just how it is.”

  “So that was his job? Being a DJ at these raves?”

  “If you can call it a job. Nobody paid him. In fact Darryl was as poor as a church mouse. Poorer, probably. It was another reason I kicked him out. It took me a while, but then I realized I was dating a loser. It became obvious to me he’d never amount to anything. He had no goals, no ambitions, except to party all night, every night.”

  Odelia glanced around, and she caught sight of a nice new mountain bike. “Is that yours?” she asked.

  “Nah, that’s Darryl’s. I told him to clear out and take his junk with him, but he hadn’t gotten round to it yet.” She sighed. “That’ll teach me to date a DJ.”

  “Do you know of anyone who might have held a grudge against Darryl?” asked Chase.

  “A grudge? I thought you said he had an accident.”

  “Just one of those things we have to ask,” said the dutiful cop.

  “I don’t think he had enemies,” said Lucy with a frown. “I mean, everybody loved him, you know. He was Mister Popular. A loser, and broke, but Mr. Popular all the same.”


  “Thanks, Lucy,” said Odelia finally, when no more questions occurred to her or Chase.

  “What do you want me to do with his stuff?”

  “Can’t you give it to his parents?”

  “I never met his parents. I don’t even know who they are.”

  “I’ll tell them to get in touch with you,” Chase suggested. “You can arrange for them to come and pick up Daryl’s stuff.”

  “I guess that’s all right,” said Lucy as she dragged herself up from her own bean bag and shook Odelia and Chase’s hands. Then she glanced down at Max and Dooley. “Do you always take your cats along with you, Miss Poole?”

  “Yeah, they like to follow me around,” said Odelia with a smile.

  “Just like Darryl,” said Lucy wistfully. “He liked to follow me around everywhere. Until he met the other girl. I guess he started following her around, and look where it got him.”

  Chapter 20

  Dooley and I were fortunate enough to be able to follow Odelia and Chase around as they talked to this and that person. Now I know talking to suspects and witnesses and generally conducting what is termed a police investigation isn’t everybody’s cup of tea, but it just so happens it’s my cup of tea, and lucky for me it’s Dooley’s cup of tea, too.

  I’m not sure why I enjoy it so much, for a large portion of these interviews simply consist of digging into people’s private lives and eliciting all kinds of little-known clues as to their personal existence. So maybe that’s it: I’m simply one of those nosy individuals who like to know everything about other people, and Dooley is exactly the same way. It’s probably why he loves watching those daytime soaps so much. Basically soaps give you a peek into people’s personal lives, even though those people are all larger than life, and their lives a lot more interesting than the lives of regular folks.