Always and Forever at Glendale Hall

by Victoria Walters

  ‘Let’s have some food and drink and then I’ll let you rest.’ She led me into the open-plan kitchen and living room. It was all tastefully decorated in neutral colours and she had scented candles lit and lots of green plants so it did feel homely, if small. ‘Ashley is at the restaurant so we’re on our own. I’ll take you there tomorrow. I’m so excited to show you. Sit, sit!’

  I climbed onto one of the bar stools as she pottered around the kitchen. ‘Can’t wait,’ I said but my voice lacked half of her eagerness.

  ‘Okay. I’m not a cook as you know but even I can’t get this wrong.’ Chloe came to sit next to me handing me a glass of red wine and taking one for herself. She placed a tray of crusty bread and a melted pot of cheese down between us.

  ‘Just what I need,’ I said, smiling. We tucked into it as Chloe told me all about the pop-up restaurant.

  ‘It’s going to be so brill. I’m helping decorate the space. We’ve gone for a really cool vibe, I can’t wait to show you, and Pierre is doing a small but gorgeous French menu and Ashley is doing all the promo and will be front of house. With you helping, and the sous chef – Eddie – and the wait staff we’ve hired it should be a great team. Opening night is Saturday, which feels crazy soon, but we already have the first two weeks booked up thanks to the power of social media.’ She gestured to her phone. ‘I’m so glad you’re here,’ she said, taking a sip of her wine. ‘It felt like a long shot as I could see how much you loved Glendale. I mean, I loved it too! I said to Ashley that we need to go back in the winter together. Can you even imagine how cosy it must be there at Christmas time?’

  I swallowed my mouthful of bread. ‘Really cosy. I just felt like this was too good an opportunity, you know? They all understood,’ I mumbled, not even sure if I was lying or not. I gulped down more wine and Chloe topped us both up again.

  ‘Even Cameron?’ she asked, giving me a sideways glance. ‘I couldn’t help but wonder if there was anything going on between you two? When you looked at one another… And with Ashley not here I can admit that Cameron is hot.’

  I couldn’t even force on a smile at that. ‘I thought maybe but no.’ I shook my head firmly. ‘I’ve always wanted to come to London. I’m excited.’ That was true but I wasn’t sure why I couldn’t feel that excited in my heart. Hopefully, I just needed a good night’s sleep.

  ‘Well, I want you to enjoy it. And you know how much I want you to show off your culinary skills. Pierre will be so good to learn from and I’ve told him and Ashley how much I loved your cooking. Obviously, the restaurant will be different to that homely style of yours but I think you’ll grasp it quickly.’

  I knew that this was going to be a gourmet restaurant, different, as she said, from my style of cooking but I enjoyed the food I made and that was the main thing. I also knew that people enjoyed eating it. I knew in my heart it was the type of food I would want to make if I ever did make this a career but I kept quiet. I didn’t think she would understand. To her, French cooking was the pinnacle. I tried not to think about what the Glendale gang would have said if I’d given them food like that at dinner time. I smiled into my wine glass. Even though they lived in a mansion, they were neither pretentious nor stuffy. I would always admire that.

  Chloe’s phone rang then and she walked over to the sofa to chat to her friend, telling me that we’d head off at eight a.m. tomorrow. I took that as my dismissal for the night so I jumped down off the stool and took a glass of water into my room. Closing the door, I let out a breath and went over to the bed, lying down on it still clothed. It was as soft as I had imagined it would be. Outside, a lamppost created a pool of yellow light through the gap in the blinds. I could hear traffic and a group of men talking outside. The sounds of a city again. I hadn’t thought I would ever enjoy peace and quiet but the noise tonight was startling after my time in Glendale.

  I couldn’t even be bothered to get undressed. I turned off the bedside light and closed my eyes, willing sleep to come, but it turned out my insomnia was still very much there. It had just been taking a holiday while I’d been at the Hall. I heard Chloe go to bed an hour later and then another hour later Ashley slipped in through the front door. I heard their low voices before the flat went dark and silent. Still I stayed awake, finally pulling myself out of bed to change into my PJs and climb under the covers.

  I was exhausted but still I couldn’t sleep. I tried to stop myself but I replayed the final conversation I’d had with Cameron over and over on a loop. Those would be the last words we ever spoke to one another. I told myself I needed to forget all about it but my mind wouldn’t let me. Finally, at three a.m. I was so tired that I drifted off to sleep but I dreamt of that cabin in the woods and the feel of Cameron’s strong and solid arms around me.

  When I opened my eyes, it was six a.m. and light slipped through the blinds into the bright white room, waking me up. I could hear traffic outside, and not birds, and it took me a minute to remember where I was. I yawned. My body ached and my eyes stung. The poor night’s sleep hit me harder after sleeping so much better recently and I sat up slowly, heavily, and ran my fingers through my tangled hair from all my tossing and turning.

  I slipped into the bathroom and had a hot shower and tried to shake off the remnants of my restless night. After I had got dressed and tried to make myself look as human as I could, I went into the kitchen. Ashley was buttering toast and Chloe was in the middle of the living room doing yoga.

  ‘Hi, Anna, you need coffee?’ her boyfriend asked. He wasn’t how I’d pictured him at all. Short and stocky, he wore a grey suit and had slightly copper coloured hair. He looked out of place in the stylish kitchen but his warm smile endeared me to him.

  ‘As strong as possible please,’ I said, sitting on a stool.

  ‘Want to do some yoga with me, Anna?’ Chloe called over.

  ‘I’m too tired this morning. I need caffeine and carbs,’ I called back.

  Ashely poured a cup of coffee for the two of us and clinked my cup with his. I took a long gulp and felt slightly better. ‘You better get ready, Chlo, we need to leave soon,’ he said to her as he pushed over a rack of toast towards me.

  ‘Okay, I’m going to have a shower,’ Chloe said, getting up and gathering up her mat. ‘I can’t wait to show you the restaurant,’ she told me with a smile.

  ‘I’m looking forward to it,’ I said, and it wasn’t a lie, I was curious to see it. I drank my coffee and thought that maybe this wouldn’t be a complete disaster. I needed to focus on why I was here – the job. And once I had my first wages, I could rent a flat. Go out and meet people. Build a life for myself in London. And then I would forget all about Glendale. They would definitely forget about me. Everyone always did.

  I just wished that the thought of them doing that didn’t make me feel so sad.

  Chapter Forty

  The premises that Ashley and Chloe had secured for the pop-up restaurant was an unused warehouse. An empty shell a couple of roads back from Angel tube station. A prime location, but the warehouse looked rough from the outside so I understood why it hadn’t cost too much to hire for the summer. Inside, though, Chloe had put her magic interior touch on it. Instead of hiding the warehouse, they had embraced it, with exposed bulbs hanging from the ceiling beams. The floor had been sanded and polished, and the bricks left exposed. The tables were reclaimed wooden park benches with black chairs, and there was a giant chalkboard at one end with the menu written on it. It was very… hip.

  ‘Wow, this place is perfect for London,’ I said, looking around. It certainly wasn’t the type of place I would picture wanting myself but I knew it would be popular with the trendy city crowd. ‘What about the kitchen?’ I asked.

  ‘There’s a restaurant across the alley,’ Ashley said, pointing to the open fire door at the side of the room. ‘They’re closed for refurbishment but the kitchen is finished so we’re renting that out. Pierre knows the owner so we’re not paying a fortune but it does mean we need to be fully booked to make a pro
fit from this. It’s not the end of the world if we don’t – we want really to build a buzz around our name so when we open our real restaurant, people will be excited, you know? I guess we just want to make sure we work well together and it’s a viable plan.’

  ‘Of course it is,’ Chloe said, threading her arm through his. ‘You’re brilliant.’

  I looked away. The sight of her adoring smile made my stomach tighten. Everyone was sitting in a circle close to the open fire door, which let in much-needed air. The morning already felt far too humid. Summer in a city, I supposed.

  ‘Ah, there you are,’ the man in the middle said when he saw us three. He spoke with a thick French accent so was clearly Pierre, the chef. I stopped short and Ashley almost walked into me. He and Chloe gave me funny looks as they sat down. But I was so stunned. Pierre looked at me and slowly one of his eyebrows rose as he recognised me.

  ‘Joining us, Anna?’ he asked after a moment, his accent even more pronounced as he said my name. I nodded once and sat down slowly, ignoring Chloe’s stare. I couldn’t believe it. I knew Pierre. As in, we’d had a fling once. I mean, what were the chances? I hadn’t even thought to ask Chloe anything about the chef. But then he hadn’t been Pierre when we had met. I crossed my arms over my chest as he talked about the restaurant, avoiding my gaze. I certainly had only been looking for casual relationships when I had met him but I hadn’t lied about my name like he had.

  After Pierre had gone through what still needed to be done before opening night, Chloe said she’d introduce us but I told her there was no need and I hurried after him when he left through the fire door, clearly keen to get away from me. Which wasn’t going to work as we were meant to be working side by side for the next few weeks.

  ‘Luc,’ I called.

  He stopped, his shoulders sinking as he turned around. He put two hands up in a defensive stance. ‘Hey, Anna, look…’

  ‘That’s funny. My name is Anna. Yours on the other hand…’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ he said although he didn’t really look it. I remembered his arrogance then. ‘But, you know, it was four weeks of fun, wasn’t it? You didn’t want anything more than casual. Nor did I.’

  ‘Why lie about your name, then?’

  He sighed. ‘Because women say they want casual and then they change their minds. It always happens.’ He tilted his head. ‘Not with you, in the end. I was surprised to wake up one morning to find you gone.’

  I had done that to annoy him. I had known he was used to using women, not the other way around. We’d met when I was in Paris for a weekend – he was good-looking and charming, and I’d admired his food, so when he’d invited me to come and stay at his family’s home in the south, I’d gone, happy to have a holiday from real life. We’d spent four weeks together and I’d enjoyed long lazy days by the pool, eating and drinking well, and steamy nights in his bed. But I’d become bored and decided I should go back to Scotland and find a job. I’d done a midnight flit while he slept, thinking I’d never see him again.

  Pierre shrugged. ‘Look we both had fun, that’s all we wanted. I’m happy to work together if you are?’

  ‘Sure,’ I said. ‘Why not?’ I couldn’t be that angry. He’d been just like me. I watched as he walked back to the kitchen and wondered why relationships like that had made me think I was happy. I turned and went back into the warehouse to find Ashley and Chloe waiting for me, both curious as to what was going on. I explained I’d met Pierre in Paris, leaving out the gory details. As Ashley showed me the menu, I couldn’t help but compare my month with Pierre to my month in Glendale. With Cameron. They were worlds apart. Why hadn’t I realised how unfulfilled I had been living like that? Pierre had meant nothing to me. I’d walked away without a second glance. This time around, I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to.

  ‘What do you think?’ Ashley asked me, shaking me out of my thoughts.

  The menu was exactly what I would have imagined Luc, aka Pierre, creating for his first restaurant. I knew the food would all be full of flavour and presented beautifully. He could have won MasterChef if he didn’t think it was a travesty of a show. ‘I think people will love it.’ And I genuinely did. Foodies would flock to this pop-up. But was it food that you would remember for years to come? Food that brought back memories and made you want to create it for the people you loved? I still thought of Christmas dinners cooked by my mother. I still longed to make one myself. That was the kind of food that I wanted to make.

  ‘But not you?’

  I was startled by Ashley’s knowing look. I shrugged. ‘I can’t help but prefer less fussy food, more home-style. That’s what I would love to do if I was a chef. I know it’s not trendy though.’

  ‘Chloe raved about your food. Sometimes people want comfort food. Sometimes they want food like this. That’s the beauty of it – enough room for everyone. I love what Pierre cooks but…’ Ashley leaned in closer and dropped his voice. ‘Sometimes I need a Big Mac afterwards.’

  I snorted with laughter. I remembered sneaking to the fridge while Pierre slept one night to eat chocolate after one of his meals, so I knew exactly what Ashley meant.

  ‘Okay, I need to head off,’ Chloe said, reappearing after a phone call. ‘I have a photo shoot. Let’s all eat together later, yeah?’ She kissed Ashley and gave me a wave. ‘Enjoy your first day, Anna.’

  ‘Thank you,’ I called after her retreating back. ‘Right, what do you need me to do?’ I asked, ready to get stuck in and forget about Glendale for the day.

  Chapter Forty-One

  Ashley and I went back to the flat after a day at the restaurant. I had been calling suppliers most of the day so my throat was dry but it had worked – my mind had been kept off all I had just left, focused on what I was doing now. Pierre had kept his distance but soon we’d be in a kitchen together. I still couldn’t believe he was the chef I was supposed to be learning from. It would look good on my CV though. He was well-known and this restaurant would be a success, I could feel it.

  ‘Chloe just messaged,’ Ashley said when I walked into the kitchen after changing. ‘She won’t make dinner. She’ll be back late.’ He sighed. ‘I do wish sometimes her job wasn’t so busy. How about we order a takeaway?’

  ‘Sure,’ I said, pouring us both a glass of wine. It seemed we both needed it. ‘So, how long have you and Chloe been together?’

  ‘Five years. We met at university. Opposites attract and all that. Her career took off so much after we left and I can’t help but miss her sometimes. That’s why this pop-up has been so good, something we’ve worked on together.’

  ‘You seem to make a good team.’ They certainly did appear to be opposites but they both seemed happy. I wondered what it was like to live and work with someone. To be with someone for five years and share a life. I still couldn’t picture me doing that. Although seeing Pierre again had shown me that what I used to think about relationships wasn’t really how I felt now. What did I want instead though?

  As we waited for the Chinese, my phone rang. I slipped into my room to answer Brodie’s call, realising I hadn’t contacted him. ‘Hey, big brother.’

  ‘You were supposed to let me know you got there okay!’

  Oops. ‘I’m sorry, I’m fine though.’ I wasn’t used to checking in with my brother. I perched on the bed. ‘I’ve been to the restaurant, it’s really cool. I think it will do well. And Chloe has a nice flat. Her boyfriend is really friendly so it’s all fine.’

  ‘Well, I’m glad. You hurried off so quickly, I was worried. We all were.’

  ‘I do feel bad about letting Beth down.’

  ‘She would never think that, you know her. She just wants you to do what will make you happy. I do hope you can come back for Heather and Rory’s wedding at least.’

  ‘I don’t know, Brodie. The restaurant is fully booked already and it’s not like you’re just down the road.’

  ‘Don’t decide now. See how it goes. Everyone would love you to come, I just wanted to make sure y
ou knew that.’

  It was on the tip of my tongue to ask if Cameron felt the same way but I didn’t. ‘Okay,’ I whispered.

  ‘Mum phoned. She was surprised to hear you’d left Glendale. Did you think about talking to her? About everything you told me?’

  Something I really didn’t want to do. ‘I will. Let me get settled here. Look, I really do have to go now.’

  ‘Okay, Anna. Well, I’m pleased you got there safely. Take care of yourself, okay? Emily sends a big kiss too. And Iona. And the bump, too.’

  I tried not to think about how much the bump would grow without me being around to see it. ‘Thank you. Send a kiss back to them. My food is here.’ I needed to hang up before I let myself think I’d made the wrong decision in leaving Glendale.

  ‘I’ll let you go but please keep in touch. I don’t want to go for weeks without speaking to you like we did before.’

  I nodded even though he couldn’t see me. ‘Bye, Brodie.’ I hung up and took a deep breath. Why did speaking to him make me feel so emotional?

  ‘Anna, food’s up!’

  ‘Coming!’ I called back to Ashley, standing up and exhaling. I knew I was kidding myself that I could forget about everyone in Scotland so easily. Just hearing Brodie’s voice had sent me straight back there.

  * * *

  The rest of the week was hectic. It was a mad rush to get the restaurant fully ready for opening night on Saturday. Chloe was publicising it like crazy, Pierre was trying recipes out over and over again, Ashley was making sure it looked perfect, and I was doing whatever any of them asked me to, becoming an assistant to the three of them. We worked long days and then in the evenings we either went out for drinks or ate at Chloe’s flat, and Pierre spent most evenings with us. I remembered how he was good company, with his stories of France and how liberally he poured the wine. Ashley was quieter than his friend and girlfriend, the sensible one of the three, and Chloe worked harder than anyone I knew. But she liked to let her hair down hard too, so we drank a lot and had fun, but as soon as my bedroom door closed and I was alone again, my heart ached for things that I couldn’t put into words.