“They missed you.” He grinned, teeth clenched. “I did my best but…well, it’s you they turn to when things are bothering them. I can’t believe Kate kept the baby news to herself. You didn’t have any idea she could be pregnant?”
Natalie shook her head. “I thought she was a bit peaky before I left but she’d always said they weren’t having kids.”
“She was feeling unwell and went to the doctor.” Lines creased Milt’s forehead. “It was a surprise and…she hasn’t told Sean about it. She says she doesn’t want the baby.”
Natalie’s heart broke for her daughter.
Milt shook his head. “I know this has been a setback but when she first got the news, well, I don’t understand how she wasn’t excited.”
“I can.” There’d been a time, it was hard to imagine it now, when Natalie hadn’t wanted children. “I know exactly how she feels.”
“You do?”
“I didn’t yearn for babies, Milt. I liked our lives the way they were. Babies were expected of me.” She gave a brief thought to the old book then banished it. “I wish I’d known.”
“Kate was adamant she wanted to wait until you came home to tell you. Only Bree and Laura know besides me.”
“How are they? I’ve been getting the odd text but not much news.”
“They’re both fine.”
Natalie pursed her lips. There was that code word again.
“We’re going to be grandparents, Nat.” He grinned and turned into the hospital carpark.
Natalie let out a sigh of relief that was a mix of concern for Kate and a niggle of excitement at the thought of being a nanna.
It was an emotional reunion in Kate’s hospital room. Bree was there and Natalie couldn’t help the tears that rolled down her cheeks as she hugged both her girls. Milt stayed a moment to get the latest on Kate and then left them in search of coffees.
The girls were full of questions about her holiday but Natalie wanted details from Kate.
“They’ve told me it’s a simple procedure. They’re going to put a stitch in,” she said. “I’ll still be able to have a normal delivery…”
Natalie gripped her daughter’s hand, seeing clearly the uncertainty in her eyes.
“Are you staying in Adelaide?” Kate asked. “They’re doing it tomorrow morning.”
“Of course I’m staying.”
“It’s good to have you home, Mum.” Bree moved up beside her and put an arm around her.
Natalie saw tears brimming in her eyes. A rare occurrence for Bree. Tears filled her own eyes and then Kate started sobbing. Bree and Nat leaned over the bed and hugged her.
The door opened behind them.
“Hell’s teeth, what’s happened now?” Milt said.
The credits of the last movie were rolling up the TV screen when Laura jolted awake. She’d spent most of the afternoon watching movies, though the last one had been through the backs of her eyelids, she had to admit, and now a noise had woken her. She looked around for the cat. He was no longer in front of the fire but sitting at the closed den door staring at the base of it.
“Did you knock something, Bubbles?”
He gave her a scathing look and turned back to the door.
She lowered the footrest, stood and scanned the room. Nothing appeared out of place but the fire had burned low. Perhaps a log had shifted and that had been the noise. She moved towards the door then paused and tilted her head to one side. There was a sound in the distance. She snatched up the remote, pushed mute and listened. The dogs were barking. She’d put them back in their kennels before she started the last movie knowing it would be dark by the time the movie finished. There was agitation in their barks, like when there was someone or something about.
Laura picked up her phone. There were two missed calls from Paul an hour apart. The last had been only a few minutes ago. She frowned at the screen wondering why she hadn’t heard them then realised the phone was on silent. She flicked it back to full volume then let out a surprised yelp as it immediately started ringing, then followed with a loud scream as someone pounded on the window behind her.
Natalie looked around the large, well-appointed hotel room. She’d been so excited by her beautiful accommodation in Broome but now she couldn’t care less about the luxury of her surroundings. She moved across to the window as Milt deposited their bags. The night was clear and she had a bird’s-eye view of the river and the brightly lit Adelaide oval where a football game was in progress.
She studied Milt’s reflection in the glass as he joined her.
“Port Adelaide are playing,” he said as he gazed out of the window. “I haven’t heard who’s winning but it must be nearly over.” He turned and picked up the television remote.
Natalie watched in the window. She crossed her arms and gripped tightly as annoyance rose up inside her. There were obstacles that needed to be faced, decisions to be made, and when at last they were truly alone Milt wanted to know the footy score. The blare of the television filled the room. He stabbed at the remote to turn it down, glanced at her then back at the television.
“It’s over. Port won.”
Natalie could already see ant-like figures streaming across the footbridge fifteen floors below.
The television went silent.
“This place is pretty flash, isn’t it?” Milt opened a cupboard. “Should be for the cost, but everything within easy distance of the hospital was booked. Steve offered us a bed of course but they live so far out. Lucky Bree has a friend a bit closer to stay with… Are you hungry? We could go down for dinner…”
Natalie took a breath, swallowing her irritation. She dropped her arms to her side and turned, knowing he felt as awkward as she did. “We need to talk, Milt.”
The expectant look on his face crumpled. He dragged his fingers through his hair. “I know. It’s just that this business with Kate and the baby…”
“I was already on my way home. Kate and the baby are perfectly safe for the moment and we’ve got time and space.”
“Fair enough, but I’m having a drink.” He opened the fridge and took out a beer. “Would you like something?”
She shook her head. She wanted no more distractions. “I left because we’d hit a wall I felt we couldn’t overcome. I tried to talk to you about it but…”
“I didn’t listen.” He slumped into an armchair, placed the beer on the table unopened and clasped his fingers together. “Can you tell me now?”
Natalie sat on the couch trying to get her thoughts in order. “It was the worry I might have cancer that set me off, made me look at my life under a microscope. Then I got the all-clear and I was determined to make the best of the soul-searching I’d done. I think I almost flew out of the consulting room. I wanted to grab you and jump up and down and laugh and dance and…” She swallowed as she remembered arriving in the waiting room.
“Instead you found me consoling Vee.”
“Yes. It was selfish of me but you and I never talked about what happened…what nearly happened.”
“Vee had a cancer diagnosis, you didn’t.”
She lifted her gaze from her hands and stared straight into Milt’s eyes. She could see his confusion. “I know that, Milt. We couldn’t do a happy dance in front of Vee but there were plenty of times after that…you didn’t once ask me how I was, how I felt.”
“Relieved? Happy? Guilty?” She frowned, tipped her head to one side. “What a release it was after the worry,” he said. “I felt that way and assumed you did too. I kept thinking it would be nothing and imagined us celebrating. I’d planned to take you out to dinner and a show that night.”
“You…how?”
“I researched it while you were having the tests. I kept thinking it would be positive news and I was all ready to ring and make bookings as soon as you came out but then…when I came across Vee, I was swamped with guilt when she was in the position I feared you might have been. If Bob had been with her… well, anyway, there wasn’t a chance to tal
k about it then and life went on.”
Natalie was amazed he’d felt the release and then the guilt like she had. And the fact that he’d been planning to surprise her… She stopped herself from being distracted. She needed to tell him the rest.
“I didn’t want life to go on as it had been, Milt. It was a wake-up call for me and I’ve had plenty of thinking time since.” She drew herself up straighter in the chair. “I’ve come to some decisions about changes I want to make to my life.”
“Hell, Nat.” He sat forward. “What changes? That sounds serious.”
“Some of it’s simple stuff, more about streamlining for me, but others, well, all of it really, rests with you.”
“Me!”
“I need you to speak to me honestly about Jack.”
Milt leaped to his feet but she held up a hand. “Don’t brush me off. I think I can deal with it if Jack is your son but I need to know the truth…now.” She blew out a breath. She’d said it and very soon she’d have her answer.
“Hell’s teeth, Natalie. I’ve told you Jack is not my son.”
“But how can you be sure?”
He rubbed his forehead, sighed and sat down again.
“I know he can’t possibly be because Veronica and I…” He sucked in a breath. “We never consummated what we started that night after the tennis carnival. I told you back then nothing actually happened. We’d both drunk too much, we were both feeling lonely. I know that sounds like excuses again but I faced up to what I did at the time. The fault was mine, not yours. There was nothing between Veronica and I except some groping in the dark, a clumsy kiss and then, before you’d even arrived that night, we’d sobered up and realised how stupid we’d both been.” He shook his head. “I hate that it’s caused you pain all over again, Nat, but you believed me then, why won’t you believe me now? There is no possible way Jack Halbot could be my son.”
Natalie saw his hurt, felt her own as she remembered that terrible time.
“Natalie?” He broke through her scrambled thoughts. “You do see Jack can’t be my son, don’t you?”
He was asking her to believe his story all over again. She’d done it once before. If it hadn’t been for the likeness she’d seen in Jack and Milt she’d still believe it. “He looks so like you.”
“He looks like Bob. Don’t you remember Bob’s fair curly hair…back when he had hair? And we have the same colour eyes. People who didn’t know Bob and I used to think we were brothers on the tennis court.” Milt shook his head. “Jack’s not my son, Nat. If it weren’t for the fact that it would raise questions we don’t want raised I’d do one of those DNA tests they talk about.”
Natalie thought about the time when tennis had been such a big part of their lives. Milt had been a star player for their local club but he’d given up the game he loved so they could avoid the Halbots. He’d done it to save their marriage. When Jack was born he’d been like a question mark for Natalie, niggling inside her, but by that time her relationship with Milt was healing. She didn’t want to open the wound again so she’d never raised Jack’s parentage. Now she had to believe what he was telling her if she was to save her marriage all over again.
She drew in a long, slow breath and made her decision. “I believe you.”
“Thank God.” He lurched across the space between them and gripped her hands.
“You know if it was anything else, an illness, a financial blow, I could have talked to a girlfriend. Brenda and I shared so much but you can’t even tell your best friend that your husband’s had a fling with his tennis partner. Once you cross that line there’d be no keeping it a secret.”
Milt nodded. “I don’t know how it did stay a secret. As it turns out my parents both knew but they obviously kept it to themselves. Veronica told Bob something plausible that made it possible for us to be neighbours but never socialise again. It’s amazing there’s never been a hint of a murmur when usually everyone knows everyone’s business in the district.” He reached out his hand and took hers, gave it a gentle squeeze. “Thank you.”
She looked at him, puzzled.
“It’s been a huge burden I’ve put on you,” he said. “Thank you for not telling anyone…our daughters. Thank you for staying true to me when I tested your love in the worst possible way. Thank you for trusting me like I trust you.”
His gaze was steady. It bored through her but she didn’t flinch away. She gave a brief thought to Gabe. Was imagining a kiss the same as actually doing it? She’d known deep down there was nothing more than friendship with Gabe but she had been tempted. A long time ago Milt had taken temptation too far but he’d paid a price for it already. She had to either forgive him and stay or walk away.
“Are we going to be okay?” he asked.
She stood and wrapped herself around him, felt the comfort of his arms around her. “Yes.”
They clung to each other then Natalie felt the rumble of Milt’s stomach against hers.
He pulled back. “Sorry, I haven’t had much to eat today. Do you fancy continuing our discussion over dinner?”
Natalie gave the cosy furniture and the big bed another look. “Let’s just order room service and stay in.”
Back at the farm Laura was sitting at Paul’s feet, her head on his knee, enjoying the reassuring feel of his hand stroking her hair. He’d heard about Kate’s trip to Adelaide on the town grapevine and had tried to call Laura, knowing she hated to be out at the farm alone. When she didn’t answer he’d driven out but the house was locked up and he couldn’t make her hear him so he’d kept calling, knocking on the door and finally on the den window, when she heard him.
Once she’d recovered from her fright she’d made them a pot of tea and they’d settled in the warm den.
“I can stay the night if you like.”
Laura sat back. “Would you?”
“As long as you’ve got a spare bed.”
She smiled. He was so proper. It was one of the things she liked about him.
“That’s something we have plenty of.”
“I’ll have to leave early. I need to be at school by seven-thirty.”
“Seven-thirty! You’ve been working all weekend.”
“Regardless I have to be on the grounds first thing on Monday. It’s always busy. Anyway, some of my weekend was spent on the fundraiser.” He reached out and lifted a strand of her hair, which was almost back to normal now. “When I mentioned you were available for haircuts etcetera there were a couple of people interested and one woman who thought you’d be just the thing for her mum. She doesn’t want to leave the house and is badly in need of a makeover.”
“Where does she live?”
“In town. She’s lost her hair and borrowed a wig from the wig library but she’s not getting on with it very well. Her daughter thought she could do with a pedicure as well but she can’t talk her into visiting the salon.”
“I suppose I could go to her.”
“It might help drum up some awareness for the fundraiser. A couple of the committee have pulled out for various reasons and one of our sponsors too. I think we might have to cancel.”
“That’d be a shame. I thought there was lots of interest.”
“There was, still is, but there’s not enough time to get everything happening for the date it was planned for.”
“I wish Mum was here. She’d have some ideas.”
“So do I. Her class misses her and Eloise and…” Paul adjusted his glasses. “I miss her.”
“Do you?”
“She’s an exceptional person, your mum.”
“I know.”
“And she’s also experienced. We have a lot of young staff, me included. She’s a steadying influence.”
“Have you told her that?”
Paul looked thoughtful, grimaced. “Maybe not. I assumed she knew.”
“Perhaps you could tell her when she gets back.”
He nodded, gave her that absent-minded professor look that made her heart skip. Laura ne
stled her head on his lap again and he resumed stroking her hair. She could almost purr, it felt so good.
Thirty-Four
Natalie, Milt and Bree were at the hospital first thing the next morning, only to be told Kate was already in theatre. That had been a shock – the day before, Kate’s procedure had been planned for closer to lunchtime. They’d been reassured it was a shuffle of the theatre list and that both Kate and the baby were well. While they waited they decided Bree would return home and they’d waved her off with Milt giving last-minute instructions. Now he paced the small space left empty by Kate’s bed.
Natalie patted the extra chair the nurse had found for them. “Sit down, Milt.”
“Do you suppose she’s told Sean?” he said.
“I don’t know.”
He shook his head. “I don’t understand how a mother can’t want a baby. Will she change her mind, do you think?”
“I don’t really know her reasons. Perhaps she’ll have some counselling.” Natalie shook her head, overwhelmed again by guilt that she hadn’t been there when her daughter had needed her – perhaps another of the things she couldn’t discard.
“You said you changed your mind once Kate was born.”
“I’m not Kate so I can’t speak for her.” She gripped his big hand in hers. “It was different for me. I liked the no-baby lifestyle but all our friends were having babies and you were so keen to be a dad…when I found out I was pregnant it took a bit of getting used to the idea.”
“I thought you lost your spark in the early days of your pregnancy because you weren’t well.”
“That didn’t help but I worried I wouldn’t be a good mother.”
His other hand went over hers. “You’re a wonderful mother.”
“I grew into it but it wasn’t easy. When they put Kate in my arms I wasn’t overcome with that surge of maternal love everyone says you get. It took me a long time to get used to being a mum.”
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