Reckless Love

by Kendall Ryan

She shrugged and got up, heading to the door. “Hi,” I heard her say.

  I assumed she was talking to Cade, though I couldn’t see because the door was just out of sight. She went out into the hallway and the door shut behind her. They talked low just outside the room, then the lock clicked again and I heard the door open, then shut.

  Silence.

  “Alexa?” I called out, but there was no answer. I got up and headed to the door, but it wasn’t Alexa who’d entered. “Ian,” I said when I saw him.

  He was bruised and cut up, his left eyebrow crusted with blood. His eye was well on its way to swelling shut, and his lip was swollen. Part of me wanted to reach out and touch him, but I didn’t. He slowly made his way into the room, and I backed up until I couldn’t back up any farther because there was a bed behind me.

  I sat down. Why was he here? Had Alexa told him where I was? That traitor.

  Ian took a seat on the bed across from me. I avoided his gaze as silence thickened the air between us.

  Unable to take the silence anymore, I finally said, “Congratulations.”

  “Thanks,” he said, but he wasn’t smiling. He held his right hand up in the air, as if the simple act of resting it on his lap was painful.

  “You hurt your hand.” I resisted the temptation to go to him and check his hand for the break I was sure was there.

  “Yeah, I broke it on Chris’s face.” His jaw clenched, and his eyes smoldered.

  “You punched Chris? Why?” I asked.

  “You know why.” His voice was raspy, yet gentle.

  God, I didn’t want him to know what happened. Unconsciously, I balled up my fists, and when he saw what I was doing he moved forward, as if he was going to take my hands. I sat on them.

  “How did you figure out what happened?”

  His lips tugged up briefly in a proud smirk. “Did you see what you did to his face?”

  I shook my head, then my vision blurred as I thought back to the night. “I didn’t stick around to see what happened. I ran, just like you taught me.” I wiped a tear from my face.

  He crossed over to sit next to me, but I scooted away, making sure there was a safe distance between us.

  His forehead creased. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Because I knew you’d do something stupid.” I sniffled and wiped at the tears again. “I thought you might go after Chris and get yourself hurt. I didn’t want to ruin your fight.”

  I put my head in my hands. “And it turns out, you did something stupid anyway, and it did almost ruin your fight.”

  Ian

  Kenzie could be so infuriating. “Don’t worry about my fights, Kenzie. And don’t you ever sacrifice yourself for them. Nothing is ever that important. Besides, it’s my fight. If I want to do something stupid before it, I will.”

  Damn, I was still pumped up from the fight.

  Her eyes widened and she blinked. Fuck, I’d scared her.

  I took a breath and tried to calm down. “I don’t understand why you think it’s your responsibility to make sure I get to my fight. I’ve been working on this my whole life, and I’ll keep on working on it. But there are some things that aren’t worth it. The thought of Chris trying to force himself on you…” I shook my head and felt the rage course through my veins. “There are no words for how angry that made me. I couldn’t punch him hard enough. I wanted to kill him. I almost did.”

  “Why? Nothing happened. He didn’t…” She trailed off and hugged herself.

  I put my hand on her back. “He tried. And I’m sorry. If I’d just fought harder for you, maybe you wouldn’t have been there with him.”

  She shook her head. “I wouldn’t have stayed with you. I couldn’t. Chris would have pulled you from the fight.”

  I drove my right fist into the bed next to me without thinking. “Fuck,” I yelled as shocks of pain spiked up my arm. I couldn’t believe she really had stayed with him for the sake of my fight. “Why would you do that? It’s not fucking worth it. This fight was not fucking worth it.” I shook from the pain of my broken hand hitting the mattress.

  “Ian,” she said, leaning forward to take my injured fist in her delicate hands. “I did it because I knew you’d been waiting for this fight your whole life. I did it because I wanted this for you.”

  “But you kept all this from me,” I insisted. If you had just trusted me, if you had just told me what he was up to, we would have been able to figure it out. Together.”

  She bit her lip and looked at me, her eyes still glistening with tears.

  I brushed a tear away from her cheek. “Kenzie, you don’t have to do everything by yourself.”

  MacKenzie

  “But I do,” I said. “All my life, whenever I’ve needed something, I had to take care of it myself. Otherwise, it wouldn’t happen. Besides, if I’d told you about Chris’s plan to pull you from the fight, you wouldn’t have let me do what needed to be done.”

  “You’re right, I wouldn’t have let you stay with him,” Ian said. “Because it was the wrong thing to do.”

  “What do you mean, the wrong thing to do? I did it so you could fight. It was the right call.” He was so infuriating. “I did it for you. But you know what, you don’t have to worry about me doing things for you anymore. I’m over it. I’m moving on.”

  I stood up, and his arm gripped mine as I tried to pull away. He pulled me back down on the bed.

  “Kenzie, wait, that’s not what I mean. The reason I don’t want you to do these things is that I care about you.”

  I balled up my fists again. “Ian, you have to stop pulling me close like this.”

  He moved closer and cupped my cheek, his eyes searching mine. “Why?”

  “Because every time you do, it gets harder for me to pull away.”

  “So, it’s true?”

  I shook my head, not understanding what he was asking.

  “Alexa, Cade, Jonah, and even Chris all think that you want to be with me. Do you?”

  I shook my head. Not because I didn’t want to be with him, but admitting it would be like admitting defeat. “I don’t want to be a distraction. I don’t want to be a burden.”

  “That is not what I asked. Kenzie, answer this. If I were someone else you couldn’t distract, if I were a lawyer or an engineer, would you want to be with me?”

  I looked at my hands in my lap and nodded.

  “Then stop this bullshit.”

  I looked up at him, shocked at his tone.

  His brow furrowed. “I’ve said it before. Being without you is the worst distraction ever. I almost lost the fight today when I didn’t see you in the audience. I couldn’t stop searching for you, I couldn’t focus until I knew where you were and that you were okay.”

  He slid his hand around my neck and pulled our foreheads together. “If Cade hadn’t told me where you were, if he hadn’t pointed you out, I would have spent the entire fight looking for you.”

  I took a deep breath as I absorbed what he was telling me. Had he really spent the first half of the fight looking for me?

  His voice softened. “I broke my hand on Chris’s face. I did that for you. And if we’d been together, it never would have happened. Because when you’re with me, I won’t let anything happen to you.” His thumb lightly brushed the back of my neck, sending waves of heat through me. “I’ll never let anyone hurt you.”

  I made a small murmuring sound. His words were the ones I’d longed for my entire life. I’d always had to be strong, to weather every up and down alone, but by the solemn way Ian’s eyes had latched onto mine and refused to let go, I knew he meant every word. He was here for the long haul, if I’d have him.

  The thought was dizzying. I’d never had a forever person.

  I could have just sat there looking into his eyes all night, but his lips were only inches from mine. With that realization, a need grew inside me. I had to taste him. I needed to kiss his lips and let him know that I was his. Slipping my arms around his neck, I closed the distan
ce between us, gently kissing his bottom lip.

  He grunted, and I pulled away.

  “Did I hurt you?” I asked.

  His mouth tugged up in a playful smirk. “Sweetheart, I hurt all over. But don’t ever stop kissing me. It’s worth the pain.”

  His swollen eye grabbed my attention again. I brushed it lightly and then kissed his eyebrow and his swollen cheek. I wanted to kiss away all the hurt.

  I pulled away and took his injured hand. “Ian, we need to—”

  He didn’t let me finish, instead he pulled me into his arms and kissed me hard. I tasted metal and salt in his mouth; he tasted like a fighter. Brutal and powerful and strong. I wanted more. Even with his injured hand, he pulled me onto his lap so that I was straddling him.

  “We need to take care of some unfinished business,” he grunted as he pressed my center into him. He was already hard, and my body ached for his.

  “Ian,” I moaned. My body heated up, and I struggled to resist the urge to give in to him. I wanted this more than I wanted my next breath.

  “Yes,” he whispered as he trailed kisses down my neck.

  “What about Cade and Alexa?” I asked, breathless.

  “They knew I came here to make you mine. They won’t be back for an hour.”

  With that information, my heart rate sped up. He was making me his in every sense of the word. It was everything I wanted.

  “I…”

  At a loss for words, I struggled to pull off my shirt, and Ian helped me as much as he could with one hand. Once the shirt was on the floor, his eyes drank in my bare skin with a hungry look.

  “Kenzie,” he growled, his gaze falling to my white lace bra. His eyes collided with mine, and seeing that I had no further protests, his fingers found the clasp and he unhooked it. He leaned back to look at me. “So fucking beautiful.”

  “Touch me,” I whispered, and he palmed my breasts gently with both hands.

  “Fuck,” he said and jerked his right hand away.

  I took his right hand gently in my own. “We need to get you to the doctor.”

  He wrapped his left hand around my waist and lifted me off his lap, placing me on my back on the bed. Then he planted himself between my legs and brushed his lips against one nipple, sucking on it. I arched my back, needing him to suck harder. He pulled away, teasing, his teeth gently grazing the peak.

  “Please,” I begged.

  “You want to go to the doctor?” he asked.

  “If you need to.” I panted and pressed myself against him.

  “Help me get my shirt off.”

  I did. His body was so amazing. I ran my hands over his chest, his abs, his back. God, he was so damn perfect. Every muscle in him was flexed, and his skin was so smooth. And his scent. I already knew I loved his scent, but after a fight, the flesh and sweat smell was all man. I wanted, no, needed him to take me right there.

  Next I helped him out of his shorts. I thought I was prepared for the size of his cock, but as it sprang free of his boxers, I let out a little gasp and looked at him, my mouth hanging open. He was perfect. Huge and straight, and the tip glistening with moisture.

  “Babe,” he said in a low voice. “Don’t look at me like that unless you want me to come right the fuck now.”

  His words were a command. I felt myself get wet, and my nipples, exposed to the air, hardened.

  “What do you want?” I asked.

  “Kenzie, I think you know what I want. I want you.” He took his hard cock in one hand and started stroking it. “Are you ready?”

  I was so wet, I needed him inside me. I nodded.

  “Show me.” He pulled me up on top of him and I straddled him. Grabbing his cock, he rubbed the tip over my wet opening and groaned. “Goddamn, you are perfect.”

  He held me by the waist and pulled me down on top of him as he pushed himself inside me, one slow inch at a time. “Tell me if this is too much. I can go slow, I can be whatever you need,” he whispered, his eyes on mine and his cock pushing inside me.

  My heart jumped into my throat and I felt filled with so much emotion, I almost couldn’t hold it all in.

  “More, Ian. I want everything.”

  My heart was wide open, and I was choosing to be in the moment and accept all the love I could feel radiating from his every touch. It was terrifying, yet amazing at the same time.

  He pressed forward, his eyes never straying from mine as he filled me. I felt him deep inside me, filling every empty place so completely.

  I gasped at the sensations and pushed my hands against his hard abs, lifting and lowering myself over him.

  “Fuck, you feel incredible,” he said on a groan.

  I sank all the way down until I felt him in a place I’d never felt anyone, and then clenched around him.

  “Easy, baby. You’ll finish me.” He held us there unmoving for a moment, giving me time to acclimate to his size as he got himself under control. “Now, go slow.”

  I eased up and back down, slowly at first, but the urgency quickly built. I needed it harder and faster, and it was all so good. I cried out as I let go. Ian gripped my thighs and pumped harder, and I felt him swell inside me.

  “Ian…” I moaned, my inner walls trembling. I was getting close and wouldn’t be able to hold out much longer, even though I never wanted this to end. Leaning down over him, I lowered my mouth to his. Ian claimed my mouth in a hungry kiss, his tongue dancing with mine in a deep, intimate way.

  “Come for me, angel. I want to feel you let go.” Ian’s left hand moved to my hip and he pushed his hips up, meeting my pace thrust for thrust until we were moving in tandem as if we’d spent a lifetime doing this together.

  I closed my eyes and blocked out all the years of little voices in my head telling me that I was unlovable and not worthy of someone sticking around. I rode him hard and wild, finally feeling free, until I came with a shout, repeating his name over and over again.

  When I finally came down from my lust-filled haze, Ian was watching me with a small smile on his face. “Damn, that was sexy.”

  I picked up my rhythm again, wanting to make him lose all control like I had just done. It didn’t take long. Using my inner muscles, I squeezed him again, and he sucked in a breath and held it.

  “Fuck,” he roared.

  Seconds later, his cock jerked inside me and he grunted my name. His release was long and hard, and he held on to me the entire time.

  As our breathing calmed down, he pulled me down to lie next to him, and he looked longingly into my eyes, not saying a word.

  I met his loving gaze, and knew this was where I belonged. Why had I spent so long trying to stay away from something so right?

  The answer hit me suddenly and made me sad. I wasn’t used to people wanting me, and wanting to do things for me.

  My vision blurred. I was tearing up, and for the first time in a long time, I didn’t ball up my fists. I let the tears spill.

  Ian pulled me to his chest and held me. “What’s wrong?” he asked, fear and concern clouding his features.

  I shook my head. “I just don’t think I’ve ever been wanted like this before.”

  “I don’t just want you, Kenzie. I love you.”

  Nodding, I wiped the tears from my face. “I love you,” I whispered back, the words tasting foreign on my tongue, and yet so incredibly perfect.

  Epilogue

  Ian

  Hearing those three words from Kenzie was like winning the championship in multiple weight classes. It felt fucking incredible, and even more so because I had to work for her love. Despite her tough exterior, Kenzie was still just a scared little girl, afraid to get too attached to anyone who might up and leave her. I hated that part of her past, but I vowed that I would make her feel loved every single day going forward.

  I couldn’t wait to get her home because that was where she belonged. With me.

  “Ian, I told you, I don’t need to live here,” she sang as she followed me into my condo.

&nbs
p; “It’s either here with me.” I grabbed her around the waist and pulled her close, kissing her soft lips. “Or you can move into my sister’s.” I kissed her again. Sophia was home from treatment and back on track. Thank God.

  Kenzie pulled away and looked at me sideways. “You don’t get to decide everything for me. I’m still in charge of me.”

  There was defiance in her eyes. I loved this sassy side of her, always rising to challenge me. It made me want to take her over my knee and spank her bare ass, not that I ever would. She would always secretly be the one in charge. Always had been.

  “Fine, I’ll get you your own place,” I grumbled. I wouldn’t have her living in that rundown apartment she had now. It wasn’t safe.

  She shook her head. “Ian, I can’t just let you put me up somewhere. I have to be self-sufficient. I need to find another job. I can take care of myself.”

  After Vegas, Kenzie and I severed ties with Chris, that douche-rocket. It was easy enough for me to move to another MMA gym a few miles away. I already knew a bunch of the guys who trained there. Jonah even followed. But Kenzie was out of a job and refused to let me help her.

  “But you don’t have to.” I felt my jaw clench and lowered my voice. “We’ve been over this. If you want me to sleep at night, I need to know you’re safe.”

  “Fine, I’ll stay here with you at night, but I keep my place.” She looked up at me with pouty eyes.

  I chuckled. “Fine. Keep your apartment. But I’ve got half a dresser that’s empty and waiting for your panties. And over half an empty closet screaming for your sexy dresses.” I drew a line with my finger up her side, tracing the outer edge of her breast. It made her nipples perk up.

  Her eyes locked on mine, her mouth in a playful smirk, and my dick instantly hardened.

  “Ian. I—” She gasped as I pressed into her. Her eyes drifted closed and she curled into me. “I know this is important to you,” she continued. “I want to be with you, but I need to take it slow. I need you to be patient. This is all very new to me. Feeling loved. Giving love so freely.”