by Amanda LeMay
I bit my lower lip and nodded.
His brows scrunched together as he ran his finger over the shiny, bumpy, scar. “Are you in any pain?”
“No. No pain.”
His fingers probed around the edges of the brand.
“I can’t feel it. I know you are touching me, I can see it with my own eyes, but there is no sensation whatsoever. At least not on the scar itself.”
“That’s common. Feeling may or may not come back. It’s hard to say. It doesn’t look infected. It’s actually a...hell, this sounds so wrong, but...it’s a good brand as far as that goes. This is professional work.”
He looked up into my eyes and opened his mouth to say something then closed it again. He glanced back at Jessy. He understood what I’d gone through. By not speaking aloud, he offered me some small measure of privacy, and maybe even saved his daughter from hearing more details than she really needed to hear.
“Do the others look like this one?”
“Yes.”
“Okay, you can pull your towel up.”
I rearranged my towel and tucked in the corner to hold it in place. Kern took my hands in his and flipped them over. Tiny cuts and scratches covered my palms, the same as the bottom of my feet, but they would all heal within the next few days.
“You don’t look bad for being on the run. You’re a little malnourished and probably dehydrated, but once we get some food in you, you’ll perk right up. I am gonna give you some vitamins I want you to take, and some herbal supplements. Running the way you did takes a lot out of you. If you want something to help you sleep, just say the word.”
“Thank you.” Everyone had bent over backward to help me and I couldn’t be more grateful.
“Jessy, would you run up to my room and grab that brown case with all the vitamins?”
“Sure.” Jessy turned for the door. Before she left, she waved a hand, motioning at the dresser. “Oh, Gunner brought you a couple of plates of food and a few sodas.” Then she was out the door.
Kern nodded over at the food. “Go ahead, chow down. I’m sure you’re starving.”
“Yes, I am.” I crossed the room as my mouth began to water in anticipation. “I wish I could think of some other way to tell everyone how much I appreciate all you’re doing for me.”
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Of course.”
He rubbed at his jaw while his brows bunched up. “This wasn’t a one-time deal, was it?”
I shook my head. “Several times a day for three days. Each brand. I can’t remember how many times, exactly. I kept fainting. I lost count after seven.”
Each scar seemed to throb suddenly as though they remembered coming into being on my skin. Kern stood silent, listening, waiting for me to finish.
“He didn’t just lay a hot branding tool on my flesh, not like you might brand cattle. He stuck it there then tapped it with a small mallet repeatedly while I screamed and begged until I passed out.” The words flowed out of my mouth as if what had happened to me was so long ago, it barely hurt to recall it. I shrugged a shoulder. “Every time I woke up, my skin had healed somewhat and he’d start all over again.”
“I hate to say this, but you’re lucky. A brand is easier to repair than a cut.” Kern growled under his breath and spoke through clenched teeth. “Sick bastard.”
With all that had happened over the course of my three-day captivity, yes, I was the lucky one.
CHAPTER FIVE
STRANGE, HOT, METALLIC fumes surround me until I choke. I know what’s coming. I try to scream, but no sound leaves my mouth.
“You are so sweet.”
My skin crawls at the sound of his dark voice. I struggle to move.
“You are mine, Simone.”
Fire touches my breast. It spreads throughout my body, throughout my soul.
I scream and scream and scream.
“Simone! Simone! It’s okay. You’re safe.”
The howling in my ears wouldn’t stop. So many scents—of the past and the present—bombarded my senses. All familiar. However, one particular scent overpowered all the others: smoky and rich, like a cozy, warm fire, and leather cloak, with an undertone of lemon oil.
A deep rumble filled the quiet room as a powerful energy touched my skin, making me shiver.
I opened my eyes and came face to face with an enormous wolf. Bright green eyes, framed by a dark brown mask above a fully silver muzzle, stared back at me. The wolf’s shoulders were immense. And there was something about this wolf—something comforting and electrifying all at once. Nothing would ever happen to me as long as this wolf watched over me. I felt it in my blood, in my body and in my soul. This wolf would fight to his last heartbeat to protect me.
A deep, masculine voice spoke from across the room. “Simone, everything’s gonna be fine.”
The last thing I wanted was some male telling me everything would be fine.
I snarled and snapped at the stranger, who had stayed in the doorway. Though...he wasn’t a total stranger, he was...Jessy’s mate.
Dain.
Ashamed, I looked away and caught sight of a black wolf in the mirror across the room.
I had shifted.
“Simone?” I lifted my head toward the sound of Jessy’s soft voice.
In the doorway, Maygan and Kern stood behind Jessy and Dain.
Jessy stepped forward, past the huge wolf that stood between me and the rest of the room. She tossed a blanket over my body and sat down on the bed next to me as she gently stroked my fur.
“Simone, hey, I think you had a nightmare. You’re safe here with us. No one is gonna hurt you.”
I gazed into the green eyes of the wolf that stood only a foot from my bed. His anxious features smoothed out, his stiff shoulders relaxing as his big, fluffy tail began to swing back and forth in a long, swooping arc.
I sucked in a breath and let the shift back to human flow through me. Jessy readjusted the blanket, making sure to cover my suddenly naked body.
“I’m so sorry.” Shame and embarrassment heated my face as I bunched the thick blanket up beneath my chin.
The last thing I wanted was to relive those three horrific days over and over in my dreams.
“I can give you a sedative that will help, if you’d like,” Kern offered.
The big wolf in front of me nodded his agreement. A week ago, I would’ve totally taken up that offer, but now, my dreams were another reminder of why I had run, why I needed to start a new life.
“No. Thank you.” I choked back a sob. “I need to remember.”
I looked down at my blanket-covered breasts. The branding wasn’t something I would ever forget, but reliving it in my mind every night reminded me that I would never allow anyone to hurt me again.
Or stand by while others were hurt. Or killed.
“Well, you need your rest, too. If you change your mind and want one night of good sleep, say the word and I’ll make it happen.”
I nodded. “Thank you. I’ll think about it.”
Jessy stood up from the bed. I grabbed her hand.
“Could you stay? Stay with me...for just a bit, please?”
“Sure.” She sat back down as the others quietly slipped from the doorway. The massive wolf didn’t leave his spot. He sat down as if he belonged there—belonged by my side.
Now. Always. Forever.
And having thoughts like that were crazy. I had no idea where they came from, especially since I didn’t even know this male.
The wolf raised his huge paw and laid it gently on the bed next to my thigh as he cocked his head to the left in question.
“Gunner.” Jessy raised her eyebrows at him. “Girl talk.”
Gunner?
He stood and slowly inched toward me, his head low in submission as he nudged his nose under my hand.
“I’ve never touched another wolf before,” I whispered, as I stroked my fingers between his large ears and down his back. The top layer of his fur was stiff and bristly. I dug my fingers de
eper into the thick, warm underlayer of his coat. “You are so...soft.”
His luscious scent eased my anxiety and quickened my pulse at the same time. I smiled as I slid my fingers over his silky, silver muzzle. He leaned into my touch, pressed his forehead against mine, and let off a low-pitched whine: a question.
“Yes, I’m...better now.” And I was. Calmer. In control.
He pulled away a few inches. His intense green gaze held me in place as if he could see all the way down into my soul. I placed my hands on the bed, gripped the blanket in my fingers, and held his stare. I wanted him to look, wanted him to see who I was, what I’d been through and that I was no threat to him or his pack.
The next second, warm, wet wolf kisses bathed my face.
“Oh!”
His tongue laved over me, from my chin to my nose, in quick, friendly swipes. He flashed his long canines in a strange, wolfy grin, then retreated to the doorway. He glanced back over his shoulder. His brows arched as if he were asking me if I might change my mind.
“I’m okay.”
He turned away and disappeared from the room, his claws clicking on the hardwood floor.
My face tingled where he’d licked me. I swept my tongue along my lips and tasted him there.
Stunned, I looked at Jessy. “Gunner?” His name came out as a sigh. His flavor was still in my mouth and I wanted more.
“Yep.” She crossed the room and closed the door. “He stuck around to make sure you were recovering. He rarely throws his Alpha status up, but when he does, we don’t argue.”
“Alpha status? He’s your pack leader?”
“Couldn’t you tell?” She waved her arms around as she spoke. “He’s got that whole Alpha-power thing going on. He can’t help it, not that he would. It just kind of broadcasts his aura all over the place.”
Gunner. He was their Alpha male. He’d stayed. No wonder I was drawn to him. When I’d run into him, earlier in the hall, his scent seemed to engulf me. I had wanted to sink into his arms. But now, his scent seemed different—changed from before—deeper, more complex and...complete.
One thing I did understand: I didn’t fear Gunner as I feared Rule.
Jessy took a seat in the comfy chair near the end of the bed, tucking her legs beneath her. She wore a short, red silk robe that barely came down to her mid-thighs. Now that everyone else had left the room and taken their scents with them, the prominent fragrance of sex floated on the air. Jessy smelled of her mate, her new husband, as if she had bathed in his scent and wore it like perfume.
And, in my childish, selfish, need, I’d kept her from her wedding night.
“Jessy, I’m so sorry. I’m fine, really. Go. Be with your new husband.”
“I’m staying. Dain’s good.” She smiled. “I’m giving him a break. Not that he needs a break. We’re pretty much all over each other, no matter what day or night it is. But, yeah, when I get back to him, what we do will be that much sweeter. Or rougher, because rough is good, too.”
Heat flushed my cheeks and I smiled. “Okay...”
We sat silent for some time, Jessy, not pushing, and me, not opening up.
Finally, I swallowed hard and took a deep breath. “Jessy...”
“Simone, you don’t have to tell me anything.”
“I want to. I need to.” I sucked in a heavy breath. “I need to get used to explaining what happened.”
“Good.” Jessy leaned back against the chair. “But, listen, if at any time you need to stop, you just stop. Okay? And you know, it’s all right to be really angry.”
I nodded. Yes, I was angry. And disappointed. And ashamed.
“Did you ever meet my mother?”
“Nope.”
“My mother is very controlling. She arranged every little thing in my life. I did nothing on my own. I was her little princess prisoner. I woke up when she said, I ate when and what she said, I associated only with the females she approved of, I watched only the shows and movies she thought were appropriate, and I was home-schooled until I graduated. The first time I tried to assert my independence was when I wanted to attend college. I wanted an education and she wanted me to go straight into Rule’s company. I didn’t have a problem working for Rule, but I wanted to have some sort of advantage so I could earn better positions and not get passed over, like other females I knew. You were there. I’m sure you saw how few females were employed in higher positions.”
“Oh, yeah.”
“After months of begging, my mother finally gave in, but I could only take the courses she felt were necessary.”
I sighed and fiddled with the blanket.
“Jessy...when I stepped foot on that campus, I had my first little taste of freedom. It was amazing. And overwhelming. And all the men.”
I closed my eyes, thinking back on those first days and how my wolf senses had been inundated with scents, sights, and sounds. Meeting Gunner had been just as overwhelming, if not more so. The taste of his smoky-leather-and-lemon-oil scent still sat on the back of my tongue and caused my mouth to water every time I thought of him.
Jessy shifted in her chair and brought me from my memories. I opened my eyes to see her sitting patiently, waiting for me to go on.
“I’d never been alone with a male. My mother made it clear that I was to remain a virgin until it was my time to breed, but oh—all those men and the scents they gave off made me crazy. It was like...my body suddenly came alive for the first time and I wanted to experience everything. I had more men vying for my attention than I knew what to do with. Of course, I couldn’t date them. That was totally out of the question, but I let my wolf libido get away from me and by the end of the first week, instead of going to my next class, I went with a human to his dorm room.”
Jessy’s eyes lit up. “No way!”
I shrugged my shoulders. “A human, a football player—defensive something-or-other. Cute and shy and...nice.”
Jessy laughed. “He treated you good, right?”
Heat bloomed in my cheeks again as I nodded.
“Good. Some of these wolf boys can be aggressive and bossy as hell, and that’s just the males I grew up around. Those males in San Francisco were freaking dominating assholes. I’m so glad your first experience wasn’t with one of them.”
“Well, I did hook up with one wolf. He wasn’t from our...my...that pack.” I fidgeted with my blanket again. “I thought I was so very careful when I picked him.” I shook my head at how stupid I had been. “He showed me how truly different wolves are from humans. What I had thought would fill my lunch hour ended up filling the rest of my day. I missed my next two classes. Every muscle in my body hurt when I’d finally crawled away, and...I didn’t want to crawl away from him. He had wanted me to stay as well, but I couldn’t. I was already an hour late meeting our driver. I’d dressed and promised to meet him the next day, then I left. Our driver had already called my phone five times, wondering what had happened to me and why I was so late.” I sighed. “He smelled that male on me. He knew what I’d done and where I’d been and told my mother. She stormed into the bathroom while I showered and put her fists through the glass doors.”
Jessy gasped. “Are you freaking kidding me?”
“She pulled me out by my hair, screaming at me the entire time, ‘What have you done?’”
“Sweet heavens,” Jessy whispered from behind her fingers.
“I’d never seen her that way...so angry...so crazed. She dragged me down to my safe room and locked me in for the night. No food. No water. No clothing. A servant released me the next morning and told me my mother wanted to see me. I stood in front of her, completely naked, while she walked around inspecting my body looking for—I don’t know what. It was...humiliating.”
“Your mother...your pack...had never seen you naked before?”
“No. Why would they?”
Jessy waved her hand and shook her head. “It’s just that—it’s a wolf pack thing—there’s no...no shame in being naked.”
I
looked down at my fidgeting fingers. “That’s not how I was raised.” And after I show my brands to the pack Alpha, to Gunner, and justice is served, no one will ever see my naked body again.
Jessy moved to the bed and wrapped her fingers around mine. “You don’t have to tell me any more if it’s too hard.”
“I need to.” I sucked in a breath and started again. “My mother informed me that I was no longer attending college. I would begin my new job. Work for Rule. Work for the pack. I went to my room, threw myself on my bed, and sobbed. A little while later she came in and said, ‘I need to protect you.’ Then she pointed a gun at me.”
Jessy’s fingers tightened on mine. Her eyes locked on the side of my face.
“I was so shocked, I couldn’t even scream. I remember thinking, she’s going to kill me, she’s going to kill me. Obviously, she didn’t. But, she did shoot a hole in the wall an inch above my head and said if she ever caught me with any other male, she would hunt him down and kill him. Then she shot another hole into the wall in exactly the same spot and said, ‘So you understand that the first shot was not an accident.’”
“Ah, damn, Simone. That’s insane.”
“She never had the wall repaired, which, if you knew her, the way she is, you’d know that everything in her home has to be perfect. She left that hole to remind us both. Every time she’d walk into my room after that, she would zero in on that hole and no matter how she tried to hide it, I saw the hatred on her face.”
I waited for the sadness to sweep over me like it had when I first realized my mother had no love for me, but it didn’t come.
“From that point on, I tried to be the perfect daughter. I didn’t dare look at a male with anything other than total professionalism. I was so afraid someone would think I was flirting and it would get back to my mother. Well, you saw me then, and yes, I agree, I was indifferent.”
Indifference was an attitude I could no longer practice.
“Twelve days ago, my mother set up a meeting with Rule. I came home and there he was, in my house.”
Rule Arawn.
I closed my eyes and could see him as clearly as if he were standing right in front of me. Black hair with a touch of silver at his temples, combed back from his perfectly chiseled, almost Greek-god face. A straight, masculine nose sitting between two dark blue eyes rimmed in short, thick black lashes. The dark blue silk suit he wore made him look as though he’d just stepped off the cover of GQ.