Even though she’d just woken up, her eyes were heavy. She felt her eyelids drooping lower and lower. Finally, she allowed them to close.
When next she awoke, it was to the pounding of the front door. She didn’t recognize the sound at first, but she carefully got up once she did.
She placidly pulled a robe over her nightgown, uncaring as the pounding intermittently continued.
“Maddie!” she heard through the door as she made it down the stairs. “I know you’re home! Open up!”
Was she imagining things? She blinked owlishly at the front door. That sounded like Adam. Why would Adam be here?
She had to squint upon opening the door. It was day. She hadn’t realized that since she’d taken to keeping her curtains drawn.
“Why didn’t you just use your key?” she inquired as she blinked up at her former husband.
He was quiet. When Maddie’s eyes finally adjusted enough that she could make out his features, she was surprised.
Adam was gaping at her, his mouth open and his eyes wide. She could swear he’d sounded angry before. Maybe she’d imagined that.
“Maddie?”
His large hands settled on her shoulders, and for a moment the touch was almost comforting.
“Yes?” She was confused. Had something happened? “What’s wrong? Is Brittney okay?” Panic edged her voice, her heart thumping erratically in her breast.
His face shifted from confusion back to concern. “Brittney’s fine,” he said gently, “but, Maddie, I don’t think you are.”
“I’m fine,” she said reflexively.
Adam’s face was grim, and she could see a flicker of something in his eyes.
“No, you’re not. Come on, let’s go inside and talk for a while.”
Maddie attempted a smile. It felt a little funny. Maybe it wasn’t quite right. It would do. “What’s to talk about? Our marriage is over. You hate me. Brittney hates me. Natalie’s gone.”
She bit her lip. She hadn’t meant to say the last part. She didn’t want to hurt Adam, and any mention of Natalie was sure to do that.
His expression remained unchanged. “Come on, Maddie, let’s talk,” he softly insisted.
Maddie wasn’t sure why, but she stepped back to let him in.
“Okay.”
The relieved look on his face made something shift in Maddie’s chest. It was small—so small, she wasn’t sure that it had happened.
Adam took her hand, the grip of his own large callused fingers almost enough to make her smile.
Almost.
The familiarity ached. For once, Maddie was just glad to feel something.
“So let’s talk,” she said with a sigh.
“I came here to pick a fight,” Adam admitted as they sat on the couch, “and I’m not sure why other than I wanted an excuse to talk.”
“Hm.” Maddie leaned back and crossed her arms.
“Don’t do that. Your mom used to do that. I hate that.” He narrowed his eyes.
Maddie’s lips twitched. “I know.”
Adam stared and then shook his head. “I’m sorry, you know.”
She raised her eyebrows. “You? For what?”
He heaved a sigh and slumped back on the couch to look up at the ceiling. “Unilaterally making the decision to end our marriage. Telling you I’d changed my mind at Brittney’s birthday party.”
Maddie clicked her tongue, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in her chest. “I’m sorry, too. For—”
“Don’t say it,” he interrupted softly. “I mean, I know I told you to find your passion, but.” His voice cut out and he shook his head. “I guess I should have known. I like her, you know. Hated her too, for a while. I thought about it a lot.”
“You’re not the only one.” Maddie tried to run a hand through her hair but was met with a few tangles. Oh, right. She hadn’t brushed it in a few days. “Although I don’t hate her. She was smart to leave.”
Adam abruptly sat up. She could feel the weight of his gaze.
“She was a damn idiot to leave.”
Maddie shook her head. “No, no. You don’t understand.” She licked her lips and began to talk about the internship, Natalie’s once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
“I don’t get it,” he mumbled. “If she’s coming back in a few weeks, why are you,” he slowly waved a hand her way, “like this.”
“I was sucking the life out of her, Adam. She told me not to wait for her. Maybe she’s even found some pretty thing closer to her age out there.”
“Madeline Garret, there’s no way she’s moved on that quickly. You leave your mark, you know.”
Tired of the subject, Maddie made a dismissive motion with her hand. “I’m thinking about going back to Davison, actually.” She waved again when he made a face at her maiden name. “What about you? How are you doing, really?”
“I’m doing pretty alright, actually. It hit me hard after the divorce was finalized. I panicked when I thought about us drifting apart like we never meant anything to one another. I love you, Maddie, but the divorce was the right decision.”
She took in a breath. Held it. “Maybe,” she finally admitted as she let it go. “We’ll always mean something to each other, Adam. Twenty years and a daughter bind us, no matter what.”
“Yeah,” he whispered. “I figured that out, too.”
That sat in silence for some time. She folded her hands together and stared at the coffee table. “It’s funny, isn’t it, how we’re finally able to talk again.”
Adam grunted and then chuckled under his breath. He shifted so he could look at her from the side. “About that. You know, I’ve been mulling something over for a while now.”
Maddie pursed her lips. “Oh, really?”
“Maddie,” he began gently, “have you ever wondered if you were actually gay?”
Her spine stiffened. “Adam—”
He raised a placating hand. “Now, hold on, Maddie. I don’t doubt that you loved me. Hear me out. That doesn’t mean you were ever really attracted to me, not in the way I was to you. Your mother, rest her soul, was a hard woman.” He looked her in the eye. “How long after things happened with Kaili did you start dating me?”
Maddie had to mentally count to ten. “What does that have to do with anything?”
“Maddie, what if you were scared to be gay? Please, think about it. Throughout our marriage, name one man you were ever attracted to. The handful of times I can think of were women, Maddie.”
“I dated Grady in high school,” Maddie pointed out with a frown.
Adam scoffed. “Maddie, please. I’ve seen your high school pictures. Grady was damn near pretty as a teenager. Don’t tell him I said that.”
Maddie’s lips twitched as she narrowed her eyes. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you. If you were the only man I’d ever really loved.”
“Now, Maddie, I’m just pointing out facts.”
With a laugh, she grabbed a pillow and threw it at his face. He caught it mid-air and smiled. “There she is.”
Maddie could only shake her head and continue laughing. Tears pooled and spilled but she didn’t mind, even when she began thinking of Natalie again.
*****
Natalie looked around one last time before slipping outside. Seattle was beautiful, if cooler than she was used to during summer. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing.
She nodded but didn’t stop as she passed some of her co-workers. Her favorite spot outside was still unoccupied, she noted with relief. The wooden bench was at a perfect angle to admire the city skyline. It was a relatively quiet and peaceful place.
The sun was out, its warmth refreshing as she lifted her face and closed her eyes. City noises continued around her, distant in her little bubble.
Silently, she dipped her hand into her pocket and retrieved her phone.
After the first week, Maddie had stopped leaving voicemails. After two-and-a-half weeks, she’d stopped calling. It had been for the best.
With only a week official
ly left of Natalie’s internship, there’d been one last call.
Natalie licked her lips as she dialed her voicemail again and held the phone up to her ear.
“Natalie, hey.” Maddie’s voice was soft and steady.
She sounded better than she had in a long time.
“It’s Maddie.”
Natalie closed her eyes. As if she could ever forget what Maddie sounded like.
“I just wanted to let you know that I understand why you did this. I don’t agree with it or your methods, but there’s nothing I can really do about either. Perhaps we should have never even begun. Maybe that’s what you’re thinking, I don’t know. I’ve come to realize that I didn’t really know much of what was going on in your head.”
Maddie sighed, just loud enough to be heard over the line. “Despite everything, I don’t regret what we had. The timing could have been better, for sure.” Maddie chuckled. “A lot better. I suppose I’m doing this for me more than you, saying some things that I’m not sure you’ll ever hear. I love you, Natalie, and I heard what you said. I won’t wait. I won’t be that burden for you and I’m sorry for how things were just before you left.”
There was a long pause, just barely-discernible static. “I wish you all the happiness in the world, Natalie.”
She ended the call before the automated voice could disrupt the lingering memory of Maddie’s voice. Natalie wasn’t sure how many times she’d listened to it. An embarrassing number, to be sure, if someone somewhere was keeping track of such things.
A few white clouds were moving lazily in the sky. She watched them, wondering at the timing of everything.
The day before she’d received the voicemail, her supervisor had made her an offer. Natalie had been excelling in her internship, even just doing a lot of grunt work. It helped that she was rooming with a bunch of strangers in a city she didn’t know with a heartache she didn’t want to dwell on. She’d thrown herself into her work.
That had paid off, if the offer to stay on had meant anything. KTU had an affiliate in Washington, she’d been told, that would easily let her finish out her degree. The company would even help her with tuition and books.
The clouds she’d been following drifted too close to the sun, making her eyes sting. Maddie’s call made her decision that much easier.
*****
Maddie tugged her robe tighter as she descended the steps. The knocking continued.
Phone in her pocket, she considered calling Grady. It was nearly ten. She hadn’t been in bed yet, having just finished applying her lotion. Who would be showing up so late on a weekday?
“Just a moment,” she called out as she gripped her phone and debated. Holding her breath, she peeked out the window. Her hands shook as she pulled them from her pockets, reaching for the locks on the front door. It took a few tries but she managed to get them unlocked.
Her eyes hadn’t been deceiving her.
“Maddie, hey,” Natalie said with a crooked smile. She was in dark slacks and a blue button-up, both of which were wrinkled. Her hair was frizzy and unkempt, but her smile remained.
“Natalie.” Maddie had often considered what she might do if she saw Natalie again. Scream? Cry? She crossed her arms and lifted her chin, trying to ignore the rapid pounding of her heart. “What brings you here?”
Natalie’s smile cracked. She ran a hand over her hair and looked down. “I guess I deserve that.”
Maddie hummed. It was unfair, how attractive Natalie still looked in disheveled clothes and her hair all out of place.
“Maddie, you have to understand,” Natalie cut herself off with a vigorous head shake. “No, wait, you don’t. I,” she frowned, “I lied.”
“What? What do you mean?”
When Natalie looked back up, her eyes were shimmering with tears. “I’m not a good person. I’m selfish. I wanted you to wait.” The first of her tears spilled over. “I could just see before I left that I wasn’t enough. I couldn’t make you happy. I didn’t want to leave knowing you’d probably break things off first.”
It felt like something in Maddie’s chest fractured. She inhaled carefully. “You were scared. So was I, Natalie. The difference is you left.” She looked away. “But I told you, I did understand that part. You were running yourself ragged and I was… depressed. I tried to pretend like I wasn’t. I put too much on you. I understood why you ended things.”
“No, Maddie I was wrong. There was—I should have just talked to you about it. Helped you find someone that could help. Breaking things off was stupid and cowardly. You deserved better.”
Maddie pursed her lips, her throat feeling thick and her tongue sluggish. “I did.” She rolled her lips together. “But I did depend on you an unhealthy amount, and mentally beat myself up an unhealthy amount.”
Natalie roughly wiped her face and then slid her hands into her pockets. “They want me to stay in Washington.”
“Oh.” Maddie could feel a last something inside her wither. She’d thought that maybe… well. “And KTU?”
“They’ve got an affiliate out there. The company offered to help pay for it.”
Maddie clutched the door hard, the edge of the wood cutting into her hand. “Congratulations.”
Natalie moved a step closer, her hands free and flexing at her sides. “I turned them down, Maddie. My family is here. You’re here. I was stupid before. I’ll spend however long it takes making it up to you. If you’ll let me.”
“You cannot possibly turn down an opportunity like that, Natalie Navarro.” Maddie shook her head. “That’s too big, too much.”
“I tried picking it over you, Maddie,” Natalie said as she took the final step forward and hesitantly cupped Maddie’s face. “I did well. And I was miserable. Please, Maddie.”
Maddie tried to speak but the words wouldn’t come. With a soft cry, she wrapped her arms around Natalie’s neck.
“I love you,” Natalie whispered softly against her lips. “And I won’t leave you again.”
The kiss that followed felt like a promise.
Maddie closed her eyes and chose to believe it.
Epilogue
Natalie adjusted the champagne glass in her hand, wishing it was something stronger. The reception was beautiful, she had to admit. The garden was elaborate but tasteful, and the white lights that traced the lattices draped overhead were beginning to flicker on. With a wistful smile, she amended her earlier thought. The reception was nearly as beautiful as the wedding had been.
A bare shoulder bumped into hers roughly, and she was unsurprised to find Tiva suddenly at her side.
“They look happy, don’t they?” Tiva tilted her head toward the newlyweds out on the dance floor.
Natalie followed her gaze without thought, smiling at the still-dancing Brittney and Hailee.
“I’m going to go steal a dance from my cousin.” Tiva didn’t wait for a response as she slipped away, her pink dress swaying as she weaved her way through the round tables positioned around the dance floor. A few moments later she was tapping on Hailee’s shoulder and offering Brittney a smile.
“Life is funny sometimes, huh?” Reeve drawled from behind her.
She turned with a grin, her eyes lighting up when she realized he’d taken the time to don a real suit. “Look at you being all grown up,” she teased as she stepped forward for a hug. She remembered to be careful with champagne glass just in time not to spill on his suit jacket.
Reeve smirked and adjusted his tie. “Yeah, that’s kind of been going around.” He paused, his face becoming serious. “I’m sorry I haven’t been by to visit in a while. Even though my probationary year is up, I’m still the new guy. Night shift is brutal.”
“Don’t worry about it, man. I’m just glad you’re finally doing what you’ve always wanted to do. I know you weren’t happy doing campus security.” They shared a smile, and Natalie could just picture him in his uniform. “How’s Deacon’s aunt treating you?”
“Oh, she’s a total hardass. Bes
t boss I’ve ever had, even if sometimes she really makes me hate her.” Reeve’s smile was back. “I think she only takes it easy on me sometimes because she’s got a huge soft spot for Tori.”
Natalie laughed, able to recall the serious woman’s face even now after so long. Her mirth dimmed as other memories came to mind. “I’m glad Victoria was able to forgive me.”
Reeve’s arm rose to settle around her shoulders, gently turning her so they were facing the dance floor. “I think that helped.”
“Brittney looks happy,” Natalie said with relief.
“She is, and she probably wouldn’t have met Hailee if you hadn’t, uh—you know, if she hadn’t met Tiva through you.” There was pink in Reeve’s cheeks as he stumbled around the subject.
She slowly shook her head from side to side. “Nah, I can’t take credit for that. Brittney would probably be pissed to hear you say that, too.”
Even after nearly four years, some things were still too sensitive.
“Maybe,” Reeve conceded with a nod. A comfortable silence settled between them before he spoke again. “Well, I better get back to my date.”
He turned to face her, and they shared another quick hug. “Have you found a place yet?” he asked as the hug ended.
“Not yet. When we do, I promise you’re at the top of my list to invite over.” Reeve’s answering grin was bright, and Natalie mirrored it for a few moments after he walked away.
A large man sidled up on her right but she ignored him, her eyes searching through the crowd for Maddie.
“Well, that’s just rude,” the man complained lowly.
Her heart sped up when she realized she knew that voice. “Adam.”
“Natalie,” he returned with a nod and a raise of his glass. He was holding whiskey rather than champagne.
“So you did make it after all.” She nodded toward Brittney.
Adam scoffed. “Like Brittney would ever let me forget missing her wedding.”
“Or Maddie.” Natalie paused. It felt odd bringing up Maddie at a wedding to him. She pushed past the feeling; they'd made their peace years ago.
“Damn right, she wouldn't.” He cleared his throat. “Kind of thought you and her would have had one of these by now.”
Meeting Mrs Garret Page 33