Honour Thy Father

by Honour Thy Father (retail) (epub)

  When a shift in the crowd swept her and Mary into a secluded corner, she could not resist telling Mary that she was finishing with Nick. ‘Don’t tell anybody because I haven’t told him yet,’ she warned. ‘I’ll tell him on Monday.’

  Mary was delighted. ‘Great stuff,’ she said joyfully. ‘While you were paired off with him it was spoiling it for other fellows. I’m made up.’

  The next moment they were swept back into the throng and although Mary had mentioned no names Laura knew who she was thinking of.

  Christmas morning was dry but bitterly cold and Laura appreciated the midi coat and midi skirt which her grandparents had bought her for Christmas. Peter Cunliffe accompanied the family to Mass then to the grandparents’ house to show them Julie’s engagement ring. Sarah and Joe came with Rosa and David and there was great rejoicing but Laura’s thoughts kept wandering to the party on Boxing Day when she would see Phil.

  The Boxing Day party was a great success and no one mentioned Nick to Laura’s relief. She thought they were being tactful until she realised that it was because there were so many other topics to discuss.

  Only Phil, when he arrived with the Taylors, said quietly to her, ‘I don’t see Nick Clegg. Is he here?’

  ‘No, walking in the Lake District,’ Laura said briefly. Mick and Gerda arrived with her grandparents and she had to hurry away to greet them.

  Mick and Gerda had given Laura the usual large bottle of Chanel No. 5 and Laura had applied it liberally as well as some of Phil’s gift of hand cream.

  Mick pretended to breathe deeply near Laura. ‘Who is this who smells so sweetly?’ he declaimed, striking a pose.

  ‘The amateur dramatics have gone to his head,’ Gerda said. ‘I hope you still like Chanel, Laura. I thought we should ask you in case your tastes had changed.’

  ‘Laura’s tastes never change,’ Rosa said. ‘She’ll stick with something even if she hates it because she won’t admit she was wrong in the first place.’

  They all laughed and Laura said in mock indignation, ‘Do you mind? I’m always ready to admit it if I’ve made a mistake.’

  Phil had drifted near them and her eyes met his before Rosa said gaily, ‘Only joking,’ and drew her away to talk to Moira.

  Everyone mingled happily and the groups constantly changed but Laura was conscious all the time of Phil. She was anxious to avoid being alone with him while she was still trying to keep her decision to break with Nick secret but no matter where she was, greeting relations, being introduced to the Cunliffes by Julie or talking to Rosa or David, Phil was never far away.

  She felt self-conscious about talking to the Taylors after her conversation with her mother but her father gave her drinks to carry to them and she felt that she had to sit down and talk to them. Phil had been talking to David but he left him and came to the Taylors.

  ‘I’m just telling Laura how much we’re enjoying ourselves, Phil,’ Mrs Taylor said. ‘Your mother has a gift for hospitality, Laura.’

  ‘She’s had plenty of practice with a family like ours,’ Laura smiled.

  ‘Mrs Redmond can do it at the drop of a hat too,’ Phil said. ‘I was very impressed that night I went to your house with Gerry after we’d changed the wheel. Your mother dried us off and provided supper of pea soup and ham sandwiches as though it was the most natural thing in the world at eleven o’clock at night.’ They all laughed but Mrs Taylor looked thoughtfully at Phil.

  ‘They were like drowned rats,’ Laura told the Taylors, ‘and I wasn’t much better. I’d just had a very hot bath and I was in a tatty old dressing gown with my hair like rat’s tails but nothing fazes Mum. She had them into the bathroom, Phil’s coat drying and Julie and me making sandwiches and heating soup in no time.’ She looked at Phil and felt satisfied that she had explained her brusque remark on that evening to him.

  Margaret appeared beside them with Amy. ‘Do you mind if I borrow Laura?’ she asked. ‘I don’t often have my bridesmaids together to sort out details.’

  Mrs Taylor agreed and Laura wondered whether she imagined an extra warmth in her manner as she said, ‘I hope we can talk again later.’

  Phil was often part of the same group as Laura but she managed to avoid talking privately to him for the rest of the evening. Even when the party broke up and people were leaving she frustrated Phil’s efforts to talk to her alone.

  I wish it was Monday, she thought. She longed to be free of Nick now that the decision was made yet she dreaded the encounter with him, partly because she was reluctant to hurt him. We’ve had good times together and often I thought that I loved him but I know I’m doing the right thing, she thought. Always some part of her had instinctively held back from total commitment to Nick and she felt that her instinct had been right.

  The meeting with Nick was even worse than she feared. He came to the house by train on Monday and she suggested that they drove to Formby pinewoods in her car. Nick readily agreed, evidently thinking she wanted to be alone with him.

  I do but not for the reason he thinks, thought Laura. All the way to Formby he talked about his weekend and how well he had kept up with the other men in spite of their longer training and experience. Laura scarcely spoke as she drove to the pinewoods but as soon as she stopped the car she turned to face him.

  ‘I’m sorry, Nick,’ she said without preamble. ‘I’ve been thinking things over and I think we should finish. It’s no use going on when we’re not right for each other.’

  He was at first incredulous then furiously angry and accused her of being childish and spiteful because he had been away for Christmas. Laura tried to deny this but he gave her no opportunity, going on to accuse her of finding someone who was a better prospect and of being sly and devious.

  Laura was not the type to sit meekly while he accused her and she said things she had never intended to say. They were out of the car by now, shouting at each other across it, because Laura felt that he was so furious that he might attack her.

  Finally the insults he was hurling at her family were too much for Laura and she shouted, ‘Right. I’m going. I hope I never see you again,’ and jumped back into the car.

  He opened the passenger door and thrust his head in his face congested with anger. ‘Don’t worry, you won’t, you slag. I’ll make your name mud. You’re the loser. I’m going to succeed and I’d have taken you with me away from all this. Remember that when I’m at the top and you’re still in the gutter.’

  He was almost gibbering with rage and Laura cringed away from him, then she turned the key in the car and the engine roared. He slammed the door and strode away and Laura managed to drive a short way before stopping the car and trying to compose herself. She was trembling with shock and it was some time before she felt able to drive home, but she scanned the road nervously in her driving mirror in case Nick appeared.

  I can’t tell them at home about this, she thought as she eventually drove home, but when she went in to the kitchen through the back door, her mother looked at her anxiously. ‘Are you all right, love?’ she asked. Laura burst into tears and dropped into a chair by the table.

  Her mother drew a chair close to her and put her arm round her shoulder. ‘What is it, love? What’s happened?’

  ‘He was horrible, Mum, horrible,’ Laura sobbed. ‘The things he said.’

  Anne said soothingly, ‘There, there, love, never mind. It’s over now.’ There was a bottle of brandy on the table and she poured some into a glass. ‘Drink this,’ she ordered.

  The brandy helped Laura and she stopped shaking and sobbing.

  ‘Where is he?’ Anne asked.

  ‘In the pinewoods. I left him there,’ Laura said grimly.

  ‘He’ll be able to get a train.’

  ‘I hope he turns the other way and walks into the sea,’ Laura declared but the mood of defiance soon passed and she was weeping again. ‘Oh Mum, I wouldn’t have believed it,’ she wept. ‘He was absolutely wild. I was afraid of him. I thought he was going to attack me.’


  ‘Never!’ Anne exclaimed aghast. ‘Oh Laura, thank God you’re out of that.’ She poured more brandy into the glass with a shaking hand and urged Laura to drink it.

  Eventually Laura grew calmer. ‘I was going to be so civilised about it,’ she said. ‘Stay friends with him. I was thinking this morning about the good times we’ve had together and that I’d be sorry in some ways to finish with him. I wanted to explain that we just weren’t right for each other, to be reasonable.’

  ‘But he didn’t?’

  ‘He flew off the handle right away. The things he said! I said nasty things too but it got really weird. He said horrible things about the family and just worked himself up into more and more of a rage.’ Her lip trembled and she gulped at the brandy. ‘I’d never have believed it, Mum. He called me a slag and said he’d make my name mud and that I’d be sorry when he was a big success and I was still in the gutter.’

  ‘The gutter?’ Anne exclaimed. ‘The bloody cheek! And making your name mud. We’ll see about that. He’ll find he’s gone too far. The family’ll sort him out.’

  ‘Don’t tell Dad,’ Laura begged. ‘You know what he’s like. He might get himself into trouble.’

  ‘He probably would if he knew that fellow had upset you like this. God knows what he’d do to him but I’ll be careful what I say to him. Never mind, love. It’s over now.’

  ‘I hope I never see him again. I’ll never forgive him or forget the things he said.’

  ‘Put it right out of your head,’ Anne advised. ‘Just be thankful you found out what he was really like in time. We had a friend when we were young who married a fellow like that. He seemed a decent man from a good family but he turned out a fiend, knocked her about, then he’d be all repentance and she’d give him another chance and it would happen again. She tried to get away from him but wherever she went he found her. That could have been you, love.’

  ‘From what I saw today, it could,’ Laura agreed.

  ‘I suppose his pride was hurt,’ Anne said. ‘He was too big-headed to take rejection.’

  ‘It certainly wasn’t because he was upset about losing me,’ Laura said grimly. ‘All that guff about caring for me was just lies.’

  ‘I don’t think so,’ said Anne. ‘He probably loved you as much as he could love anyone, but people like him, they never really love anyone but themselves. Have some more brandy.’

  Laura managed to smile. ‘No thanks. I’ll be tipsy and you’ll have none left for your cooking. I’m all right now.’

  ‘That’s good. We’ll have a cup of tea instead.’

  ‘The cure for all evils,’ Laura said wryly.

  She left it to her mother to tell the family that she would not see Nick again, without too many details, and Julie responded by showing her even more affection.

  ‘You’ve done the right thing,’ she told Laura. ‘He wasn’t good enough for you.’

  Gerry said the same to her and added, ‘He’s not liked, you know. Always throwing his weight about but creeping to people who might be useful to him. Even his mate Dave is cheesed off with him and there’s no one more easygoing than Dave.’

  Rosa and the rest of the family were informed and when Laura returned to work she told people at the office and within a few days it was general knowledge.

  ‘People are hypocrites,’ Laura said indignantly to her mother. ‘Everyone seemed to like Nick when we were going out together and now they can’t say a good word about him. They think I’ve had a lucky escape.’

  ‘They were just being polite before,’ said Anne. ‘If he was your choice and you seemed happy, they couldn’t very well say they disliked him.’

  ‘I still think it was two-faced,’ said Laura. ‘I’d have told the truth.’

  Anne had been to tea with Mrs Taylor in the week between Christmas and New Year so Laura was fairly certain that Phil would know about her break with Nick. She wondered whether it would matter to him and what he would say if she met him again.

  Her father’s reaction surprised her. She had not seen him until they met in the hall the following day and he said gruffly, ‘Glad you got rid of that fellow. Lifetime of misery ahead with him.’ He thrust a paper bag into her hands. ‘Russets,’ he said. ‘Saw them. Know you like them.’

  ‘Er, thanks, Dad,’ Laura stuttered, then as she looked into the bag she murmured, ‘“Comfort me with apples for I am sick of love.”’

  Her father was staring at her in amazement and she said, ‘It just popped into my head. “The Song of Solomon.”’

  ‘That wasn’t love,’ her father said, still gruff. ‘You’ll find someone who will. You’re a loveable girl.’

  He bolted into the living room obviously embarrassed and Laura went up to her bedroom feeling warm and comforted. For the first time since the scene in the pinewoods she felt confident and happy.

  A few days later she was clearing up loose ends before starting her new job when a call was put through from the switchboard. ‘A Mr Philip Casey to speak to you Miss Redmond,’ the girl announced. Laura said as formally, ‘Put him through, please.’

  ‘Laura?’ said Phil. ‘I’m in town. Any chance of meeting for a meal before you go home? Or is your mum expecting you home?’

  ‘I’ll ring her,’ Laura said. ‘I’ll finish at five thirty. Can you come to the office?’

  He was waiting in the foyer of the office block as she ran lightly downstairs and he took her hand and smiled down at her. Suddenly, without a word said, Laura felt a sensation of security and deep happiness which would never leave her.

  The evening was bitterly cold and Phil took off his scarf and put it over Laura’s head and round her neck. ‘You lose most of your body heat through your head, you know,’ he said and Laura stood meekly, thinking of another occasion when her Uncle Joe had done the same for his wife. The word cherish floated into her mind.

  In the restaurant Laura asked Phil immediately if he knew that she had broken with Nick. ‘Yes, Gerry told me and the other day I was at the Taylors and Mrs Taylor told me.’ He hesitated then took Laura’s hand. ‘She said she knew I was carrying a torch for someone and she thought it might be a married woman because I said nothing but she realised on Boxing Day it was you.’

  Laura looked down at their clasped hands. ‘I knew then that I wanted to end it with Nick but I couldn’t say anything until I’d been able to tell him.’ She shivered. ‘It was awful. He made a terrible scene. Like a different person altogether. I’ve been a fool, Phil.’

  ‘No, you haven’t,’ he comforted her. ‘Clegg could be very charming when it suited him and he really fell for you. I was the fool to let him cut me out at the Cabaret Club because I knew then how I felt about you, that I love you, Laura.’

  ‘I didn’t know,’ she said in a low voice. ‘I always liked you, Phil, from when I first met you. I could always talk to you so easily.’

  Their food arrived and they ate mechanically, smiling at each other, unaware of what they were eating.

  ‘Coffee is served in the lounge, sir,’ the waiter said when they had finished and they drifted to a secluded corner, still in a dream.

  ‘I felt I couldn’t butt in once you seemed fixed up with Nick,’ Phil said as though their conversation had never been interrupted. ‘I think now I was a fool. Do you think I’m a weed, Lol?’

  ‘No, I think you’re honourable,’ she told him stoutly. ‘You tried to play fair. Nick must have sensed something. He was mad jealous of you but then he was jealous of everybody.’ She looked at Phil’s expression and exclaimed, ‘I’m sorry going on about him. I won’t mention him again.’

  Phil smiled at her. ‘Then I certainly won’t,’ he said gravely and they laughed together.

  ‘You’ve got dimples when you laugh,’ he exclaimed. ‘I’ve never noticed them before.’ He leaned forward and kissed her. ‘There’s so much I want to know about you yet in a strange way I feel I know everything about you already.’

  Laura smiled. ‘That’s exactly how I feel.’r />
  The hours flew by as they talked over every detail of their meetings and it was only when the waiter had brought coffee twice and taken it away untasted that they returned to earth enough to set out for the station.

  ‘Phil, it’s late. What time will you get home to Woolton?’ Laura asked when he went to the ticket office.

  ‘That’s all right. There’s no one waiting up for me,’ he said with a grin and in the train they sat close together, oblivious of other people.

  Phil left her at the gate but arranged to meet her again at the office the following day. ‘I’ll be able to wait inside,’ he said with a smile. ‘I feel as though I know every brick of it. I’ve spent so many hours hanging about outside it, hoping to see you.’

  ‘Why didn’t you come in?’

  ‘Because I had to pretend it was an accidental meeting.’ Phil took her in his arms and kissed her tenderly. ‘It’s different now, isn’t it?’ he said softly. ‘Do you feel it too, Lol, that this is the real thing? It is for me.’

  ‘And for me,’ Laura whispered.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  The weather after Christmas was atrocious. Snow, sleet rain and freezing fog followed in quick succession but Laura was too happy to care. She and Phil spent every available moment together but there never seemed enough time for all that they wanted to say to each other.

  To add to her happiness, everyone liked and approved of Phil and he fitted in to the family as though he had always been part of it.

  Phil had not spoken about his own family until a day early in January while they were still off work. They were in the kitchen with her mother when the window cleaner knocked for his pay and the cup of coffee Anne always provided for him.

  He was a garrulous old man, proud of his knowledge of the family, and he said immediately, ‘I suppose it was a sad Christmas for you, Mrs Redmond, missing your sister and that.’