Fearless

by Marianne Curley

  I hold out my hands and he takes them, and in his eyes I see a tortured soul so remorseful he is willing to do whatever he can to make amends. ‘It’s all right, Uncle, I forgive you.’

  We embrace, and when we pull apart, the man who was once my teacher but really an angel, who betrayed me, saved me, and then warned me of Luca’s trap, turns and walks back towards the monastery with Brother Alex patting his shoulder.

  Shae and Isaac and my new security guard move closer to the portal. Nathaneal takes my hand. I wave at Jordan and Amber, but I can’t just walk out of their lives like this. I run back and hug them both at the same time, squeezing them hard, but tenderly. ‘I love you both. Take care of each other.’

  I take Nathaneal’s hand again and this time we walk into the portal, with me glancing over my shoulder and blowing kisses with trembling fingers and a racing heart. And suddenly there are no words left. Knowing this, Nathaneal releases his wings, sweeps me into his arms and lifts me into the skies of the ever-changing border realm. While he holds me, I rest my head on his shoulder and sob, for the end of my time on Earth, on the saddest day of my life.

  But today is also the beginning of my new life, an eternal life with Nathaneal, living and breathing, learning and loving and growing amongst my own kind, with parents who have waited nearly seventeen years to meet me, and family and friends I’ve yet to meet but who will become integral members of my new world, the world where I know in the deepest parts of my heart and soul that I belong.

  Avena

  Standing before the great northern gates, I stop to catch my breath and absorb the reality of the moment. Today, I’m coming home.

  While Nathaneal and Isaac have a chat with the Gatekeepers, two males of the Dominion Order, my own guard keep near and watchful with their large almond-shaped eyes.

  Nathaneal and Isaac return with two towering Archangels, one male, the other, who appears to be in charge, female. He introduces them, explaining, ‘They have orders to take your security guard to Empyrean for debriefing and training.’

  ‘Is that necessary?’ I ask. Since the High King told me the truth about the ‘dark forces’ I have felt a need to make up for the treatment Gabriel put them through. I can’t do that if they’re taken from me.

  ‘They will be safe and return with invaluable skills,’ she explains.

  I ask her, ‘How long will this process take?’

  ‘That depends on their current skill levels, and how quickly they reach the standard considered adequate to protect you, Princess Ebrielle.’

  My eyes fly to Nathaneal’s, asking him why she just addressed me as Princess.

  He laughs under his breath. Heads turn to him but he brushes away their questions, sending me the image of the High King bestowing me with the title ‘Princess of Hope’.

  Oh. That was for real?

  Using mind-link imagery to communicate with my seven security guards, I explain that they have to go with the Archangels to Empyrean. They are unwilling to leave me, but I assure them I will be safe with Nathaneal until their return, and though they remain reluctant they go quietly, zooming into the sky via the Archangels’ preferred method of transportation – straight up and very fast.

  Linking his fingers with mine, Nathaneal squeezes my hand. He can’t seem to stop grinning. He’s so excited his heart is beating like a hummingbird’s on a warm summer’s day. He keeps looking for excuses to touch me, to whisper words, to suddenly pick me up and spin me around, or lift me into the air and gaze up at me with his blue eyes glazing over, shaking his head.

  And now, as we stand before the gates, a few steps from entering Avenean territory, he leans down and whispers, ‘Are you ready to come home, Ebbie?’

  ‘As long as I’m with you, I’m ready for anything.’

  The gates swing inwards, revealing the Arc of a Thousand Stairs, the bridge known throughout the universe for uniting one world to the next in spectacular style.

  I watch with trembling knees as the stairs spiral downwards in their famous arc, appearing as if they’re floating in air.

  Shae’s palms come down on my shoulders. ‘Welcome home, sister.’

  Overwhelmed with emotion, and still a little numb from all the goodbyes, I just nod, and wish that every time I close my eyes I could stop seeing Shadow and feeling my heart overflow with sadness. Leaving him behind has left a deep chasm inside me that’s not going to be easy to fill.

  Halfway down the glittering stairs, as my lungs gradually adjust to the subtle atmospheric changes, I get my first glimpse of the capital, Aarabyth. Its gleaming glass towers reflect the sunlight in a rainbow of colours that makes me sigh in wonder. ‘It’s beautiful.’

  Nathaneal nods. ‘Wait till you see the gardens in the Centre Square, the purple magnolia trees that surround it, and the Temple with all its pillars, and the towering cathedral where royalty is crowned, and –’

  Isaac comes up behind us. Throwing an arm around each of us he looks at Nathaneal first. ‘If your grin gets any wider I’m afraid your face will split into two, and Michael will have me hung and quartered.’ He turns to me. ‘There’s plenty of time to see the city. It’s hardly changed in three thousand years.’

  I laugh. ‘Wise words, Isaac. Let’s go home.’

  We reach the last stair and step on to the viewing platform. Apparently I’m going to be living on a property next door to my sister’s in the Lavender Ranges, where she and Isaac live with their young daughter – my niece, whom I can’t wait to meet.

  A bubble of excitement tries to mushroom inside me, but just as quickly it deflates again. I stand still for a moment and just breathe. Underlying the flawless beauty of this land, there’s also a sense of freedom. Of peace. It stirs inside my veins. And there’s a scent in the breeze that’s fresh and full of promise. I know I’m going to be happy here. It’s just that now my heart is heavy with the friendships I’ve had to leave behind, my human parents, my best friends, and Shadow.

  Nathaneal pulls up our linked hands and kisses my knuckles, one feather-light kiss after another. ‘It will take time.’

  I nod and manage a smile. He deserves to be happy.

  Shae moves to the left of the platform, facing north. She glances at us over her shoulder. ‘Ready, everyone?’

  The four of us leap into the air, wings unfurling, beating, lifting us higher and moving us faster towards the Lavender Ranges, apparently named for their mass displays of lavender blossoms all year round.

  ‘You will smile freely again, Ebbie,’ Nathaneal says as he flies beside me. ‘It won’t be long.’

  ‘I know. But, oh, Nathe, Shadow won’t understand why I left him, why I’m not walking into his stable every morning and taking him out for our usual ride. I can’t shake the image of him watching the door, and waiting. I know him. He will wait and watch every day. He will grow old watching that door. For the rest of his life he’s going to think I abandoned him. And he will be right.’

  He pulls me against him, wings and all. ‘Let me hold you, Ebbie.’

  I retract my wings and we fly facing each other, chest to chest, Nathe’s strong arms folded around me, his hands on my hips keeping me secure.

  I close my eyes, listen to his heart beating and let him take me home.

  It’s not long before we’re landing on park-like grounds dotted with thatches of tall lavender trees, shady green willows, acacias with their carpet of gold foliage and exotic flowering gardens. We appear to be on a ridge overlooking a river hundreds of metres down a sloping embankment covered in colourful wild flowers. Shae smiles as she watches me take it all in, then turns me around and walks me up a gentle hill. Both of my hands fly up to cover my mouth as I gasp at the sight of my new home, a multi-level house of sand-coloured stone bricks with wide, clear glass windows, cute jutting balconies and a roof split into various levels, giving it the appearance that’s it’s about to fly away.

  ‘Does this mean you like it?’ Shae asks, her eyes flickering to Nathaneal and Isaac.


  ‘Like it? Are you kidding?’ I spread my arms out and twirl around. ‘Look at this place.’ My eyes find Nathaneal’s. ‘You did this?’ His nod is slight, nervous, worried. ‘It’s downright stunning.’

  Isaac whacks Nathaneal on the back. ‘And you were afraid she wouldn’t like it,’ he teases, winking at me. ‘Wait until you see what your fiancé has done with the inside.’

  Nathaneal shrugs, and he’s so adorable in his sudden vulnerability that I can’t help but stretch up on my toes and kiss his mouth, thoroughly. He moans and wraps his arms around me and, lifting my feet off the ground, he kisses me back just as thoroughly. Immersed in each other, we forget where we are, who we’re with, what we’re supposed to be doing.

  Isaac clears his throat several times before the sound penetrates our blissful fog. ‘Plenty of time for that later,’ he says, jerking his head towards the house with a cheeky grin and a wink.

  In the end though, it’s the sound of beating wings that eases us apart and has us staring up at a wondrous sight in the sky.

  ‘Oh wow.’

  I recall Nathaneal telling me once how the horses on Avena have wings, but to see one actually flying, a beautiful white stallion so similar to Shadow that tears gather behind my eyes … Except for the big brown wings he’s flapping, I could swear it was Shadow.

  The angel riding him is Michael, accompanied by Jezelle, flying solo beside the pair. She lands in her usual elegant fashion on high-heeled boots, immediately retracting her striking turquoise wings as soon as her feet hit the ground. Meanwhile, Michael rides the horse all the way down, jumping off when the horse stumbles its landing and almost throws the prince clear across the field.

  I stare in awe as the horse flicks his wings to their magnificent full width, then folds them down against his sides.

  Isaac gives Michael a hand up while Jezelle comes over and kisses my cheek. ‘How was your journey?’

  ‘G-good,’ I answer, stuttering a little, unable to stop myself from walking as if in a daze towards the horse. His wings look familiar. And even while they appear somewhat odd against the horse’s snowy coat, I get the sense that I should know them.

  Michael kisses my cheek. ‘Welcome to Avena, little one.’

  ‘Thank you, Michael. You have a beautiful horse,’ I remark, still unable to take my eyes off it.

  He flicks a glance at it over his shoulder. ‘Yes, he is a beauty.’ He hands me a gold card. ‘But he doesn’t belong to me.’

  ‘Huh?’

  He indicates the card by nodding his head at it. ‘Could you read that for everyone to hear, Ebrielle?’

  ‘Uh, sure.’ I open the flaps at both ends and the first thing I notice is the calligraphy. Not only are the words written in flawless articulate strokes, it’s as if the ink, if that’s what I can call this gold lettering, is floating above the card, in its own dimension. ‘Who wrote this?’

  ‘The High King,’ Michael says.

  Closing my hanging jaw, I take a deep breath and start to read.

  Dear Ebrielle,

  The bond between a horse and owner can prove too deep to sever without consequence. It is the way with you, and it saddens me. I have therefore intervened with the laws of nature to set things right. The wings, donated by someone who no longer has use of them, come with glad tidings. Princess of Hope, please accept my personal gift to welcome you to Avena.

  His Highness.

  I glance up, searching for Nathaneal, but he’s already beside me, reading over my shoulder. ‘Did you know?’ I ask.

  He shakes his head, speechless, his eyes glistening and brimming over with joy for me.

  Shae asks for the card. I hand it to her and run the last few paces, melting into Shadow’s warm, silky Arabian coat. ‘Oh, baby, you’re here. You’re really here with me.’ Tears flow down my face but I don’t care who sees me crying this time. This isn’t about being strong or weak; these tears are because I’m grateful and humbled and clearly overwhelmed.

  With my arms around Shadow’s neck, my face flush against his beating heart, I peer sideways at Nathaneal as he examines one of Shadow’s new wings with awe, and suddenly my thoughts turn to Amber. How did she take the news of Shadow leaving? He was her link to me and now she’s lost that. But knowing Amber as I do, she would want this for me.

  I run my hand over Shadow’s chest and across to his new wings, the rich dark colour so beautiful against his snowy coat. I touch his feathers with my fingertips. They’re warm, silky and seem to welcome me with a sense of familiarity. I lift one wing and gently tug it part way out. Wow. It extends from his body as if he were born with it.

  Catching Nathaneal’s eye over Shadow’s back, I ask, ‘What will happen to Shadow, living here?’

  Nathaneal says, ‘I’m really not sure.’

  But Michael is grinning. ‘The king has bestowed Shadow with immortality.’

  ‘Really?’ My fingers start to tremble. ‘Did you hear that, baby? You’re going to live a long life here with me.’

  Shae comes and checks out Shadow’s wing which I’m still holding partly extended. ‘This frame is more complex than is usual for a horse’s wing.’

  That’s when it occurs to me. ‘I know who these wings used to belong to. I know who gave them up for Shadow.’

  Nathaneal raises his eyebrows while the others exchange questioning glances. ‘My uncle,’ I explain. ‘Zavier.’

  Shadow lifts his head up and down, flattens his ears and flaps his tail high in the air. Nathaneal shakes his head and smiles at me. ‘I think the High King might have a soft spot for you. I hope this doesn’t mean I have competition, because that could really get awkward.’

  His remark has everyone laughing. But I roll my eyes and forge a private link. There will only ever be you, my love.

  As Nathaneal continues to hold my gaze, Isaac coughs softly and suggests they should head inside. They all readily agree to wait for the others in the house.

  And suddenly we’re alone – not counting Shadow. And while I stroke Shadow’s long neck, still in awe that he’s here with me, I raise my eyebrows pointedly. ‘Others?’

  ‘A small gathering to welcome you home.’ He shrugs with an adorable smile. ‘I couldn’t stop them.’

  A noise from the house gets our attention. It’s Tash tapping at a rear window. Considering that’s Uriel I can see beside her, I’m guessing they’re in the kitchen cooking up a feast. They see us looking and wave.

  So while we’ve been out here with Shadow the house has filled up with guests. Solomon runs out and welcomes me to Avena with a kiss on my cheek before returning inside.

  Meanwhile, a group of angels arrives that I don’t recognise. Nathaneal watches them with interest and once they appear settled inside he slides his hand down my arm and links fingers with me. ‘I have so much to show you, but the sun is setting soon and I believe it’s time for …’ He pauses to tuck a lock of my hair behind my ear. The strands wrap around his fingers. He gives a little shake and we both smile as they untangle instantly.

  ‘You were saying? Time for what exactly?’

  ‘It’s time for you to meet Elesha and Rhamiel, your mother and father.’

  ‘They’re here? Now?’

  ‘They’re waiting inside, along with my parents and three of my brothers you haven’t met yet.’

  ‘Nathe, I’m not sure I’m ready for mothers and fathers and brothers yet. I’ve only just got Shadow back.’

  He points to a barn and a series of stables connected to the house’s southern end by a covered walkway. ‘Shadow will be fine. We’ll take him to the stables first, introduce him to his new friends.’

  ‘Friends?’

  He just flashes his stunning smile at me.

  ‘I thought I was going to get a few days to unwind.’

  He holds my face between his two hands and soothes me with a kiss that stops my pulse from skittering, a kiss so full of love it leaves no room for doubt. He draws back and looks into my eyes with his own a blaze of brilli
ant blue fire. ‘Ebrielle, you have nothing to worry about. You’re home now.’

  He’s right. I’m finally home. And I can’t think of a more beautiful place to live.

  The End

  Acknowledgements

  What a journey I’ve had with this series. It began as a thought in my hospital bed ten years ago that I shelved until I could write again. Chemotherapy for bone marrow cancer, and painkillers for a broken back, had the nasty side effects of damping down my concentration levels. Once I was home, my medications had me falling asleep on the computer, literally, every day for a few years after my transplant in 2004 until my health improved and my medication decreased. It was 2007 when I began to write the first draft of Hidden. By December the following year the first draft was completed and came in at a massive 140,000 words. After many revisions and trimmings the manuscript landed on my publisher’s desk in 2010.

  Ele Fountain, Bloomsbury Publishing’s Senior Commissioning Editor, read it, saw how good this series could be and made me an offer for three books. It was like starting over again with my first publication. The joy was immeasurable.

  My heartfelt thanks go to Ele, who pushed me to lift and lift until Hidden was right for the market that had changed so much in the eight years since my last book, The Key, had been published. Thank you, Ele. It was a pleasure working with you. I wish you all the best in your new adventures. After fifteen years and five books together I will certainly miss you.

  Zöe Griffiths, a lovely person and a brilliant editor, stepped in for Ele in editing Fearless. Zöe, I could not have been happier to land in your more-than-capable hands. Thank you for reading Hidden and Broken on your honeymoon and then pushing me into making Fearless the best of the series.