by Emily Camp
“Seems like Garrett’s a good dad.” Haven reached behind her, grabbing a blue and white paper cup and slurped.
“He is.” Bree wasn’t sure if that was a compliment or not. Why wouldn’t he be a good dad? Did Haven know something she didn’t?
Bree caught another look from Paige. Would she just quit looking at her?
“Ignore her,” Khloe whispered in Bree’s ear.
“Did you see the new girl with Jake Porter?” Sarah leaned forward, her elbows on the table and eyes wide.
“I didn’t know there was a new girl.” Khloe picked at a basket of French fries. “But I don’t care what Jake does anyway.”
“We know you don’t care.” Haven slurped her drink again. “Who would stay hung up on Jake Porter when you’re dating Hudson Ley?”
Khloe’s cheeks pinked.
“How is Ley doing at college?” Rowan’s voice boomed over the chatter, and the whole area turned toward Khloe for a response.
“He’s been busy.” Khloe looked back down at the fries.
Everyone turned back to their own conversations.
“He still hasn’t called?” Sarah fiddled with the silver S pendant hanging from her neck.
“Well,” Khloe fidgeted, finally popping a fry in her mouth. She chewed as the girls watched her for an answer. “It’s football season, and he’s got a lot more pressure in college.”
“And a lot more chicks, too,” one of the guys behind them hollered, then the group hooted and high-fived.
“Don’t listen to them, Khloe.” Bree brought Bailey to her chest when she began to squirm.
“Dadada,” Bailey reached up. Bree tilted her head back to see Garrett heading toward them with the ice cream.
Another round of ‘awes’ came from the table.
“Bailers,” Garrett smiled, lowering the ice cream to the table as Bree leaned back for him. Sarah scooted down, making room.
“Dadadada!” Bailey’s voice grew louder.
“Hold on. I’ll get you.”
Bailey whimpered and bounced on Bree. “Dadada.” Her tone changing as Garrett lifted her from Bree.
“Bail, Bail, Bail, Bail.” He leaned his face away from grabby hands.
She giggled and wiggled her legs.
“Want some ice cream?” Garrett climbed beside Bree.
“Gare, I don’t …”
“She’ll be okay.” Garrett slid his bowl toward him. Adjusting Bailey on his knee, holding her on with one arm as he dipped his plastic spoon in, one of the plain vanilla spots. His concoction had been sprinkled with a rainbow of flakes.
He scooped the spoon in her mouth. Little pink lips wrapping around the plastic, her eyes widened and she smacked her gums together. Everyone giggled at her reaction. Bailey looked up at Garrett, scrunching her nose, she let out a laugh.
Rowan climbed in beside Haven with a burger as big as Bailey’s head. “That ice cream’s good stuff.”
“You like that?” Garrett fed himself a spoonful before giving Bailey another as she continued to chew on nothing.
“Garrett, you shouldn’t give it to her,” Bree said.
Then Lewis sat on the other side of Sarah.
“Relax, it’s a special occasion.” Garrett spooned another bite into her mouth.
“You two are so cute. Just like a little married couple.” Haven removed the lid from her drink now and dipped her dainty hand in the cup, bringing a piece of ice to her mouth.
Married couple. Bree flinched at the thought. The last time Garrett said that, it wasn’t a good thing he was referring to and maybe he was right. They were like an old married couple.
Lewis laughed, reaching across the table and grabbing a handful of Rowan’s onion rings. “She’s getting some good grub here.”
Bailey eyed the crowded table, her blue eyes wide and head bobbing a little. Bree wasn’t sure what she was going to do. At first, her little mouth started to pucker, then Garrett bounced her. She tilted her head back. Looking up at him, and giggled.
Before long, everyone was sitting around them, entertained by Bailey’s first taste of ice cream. Even Paige was at their table. Though she barely looked Bree’s way, her smile was on Garrett. She kept making comments about how much Bailey looked like her daddy. Bree saw it, too, but that was her baby and boyfriend Paige was talking about and she didn’t like it.
“What are we going to do tonight?” Rowan jumped up, shouting for all the place to hear.
Bailey flinched in Garrett’s arms, but he didn’t seem to notice as he replied with the rest of the team, “Beat the Cougars!”
The noise level and the excitement was beginning to be a little much for Bree. It was sure to over-stimulate Bailey.
“Yo, anyone know where Porter is?” Lewis leaned over the table.
“Who cares?” Paige flipped her hair again, as if nobody knew she had hair or anything.
“I saw him with that new chick after school, probably went to …” Rowan looked at Bailey. He lifted an eyebrow, as is eyes lifted toward Garrett. “You know. Little ears, can’t say.”
Garrett’s laugh was loud and got on Bree’s nerves. “She’s only a baby.”
“He has respect.” Bree began.
“I’d like to know, who is this mysterious ‘new girl’?” another from the crowd said.
Rowan shrugged, “I don’t know, some freshman.”
“Jailbait,” Lewis chuckled in his cupped hands.
“For you, dork-wad.” Haven tossed a balled up napkin at his head. “Jake’s a junior, he’s only sixteen.”
Bree picked at her ice cream, pushing it around. Luckily, Garrett was too preoccupied with his friends to notice she hadn’t taken a bite. Not that she was starving herself. She still ate at least two meals a day, three if she thought about it. But she was trying to stay away from junk food.
The loud rumble made everyone stop and stare at Garrett.
It took maybe a split second before they roared with laughter. Bree cringed, knowing what that, and the stench that followed meant.
“Awe man, that’s rancid.” Rowan covered his nose with his jersey.
Lewis gagged and laughed. “Garrett, that’s whoa, I can’t.”
Bailey giggled from his lap, just as she ripped another.
“I think my leg just caught some.” Garrett squeezed his eyes shut, but the laughter grew louder.
“Oh my gawd,” Haven squinted, holding her nose.
“Dude, people are trying to eat here,” Rowan’s voice came out nasally.
“I told you not to feed that to her.” Bree turned toward Garrett, her face warm.
“It wasn’t that.”
Bree reached for the diaper bag.
“Here, I think she’s done.” Garrett held Bailey out toward Bree.
Everyone gagged again.
Bree bit her lip. Was he serious? He was the one who insisted on giving her ice cream, now she had to change her?
“Put it back,” Rowan muffled.
Garrett stood, with Bailey dangling in front of him. A wet spot splotched on his thigh.
Bree glared at him.
“What? I need to clean up, too.”
She let out a long breath and tossed the bag over her shoulder. The table laughing and coughing as Garrett and she made their way toward the bathrooms.
Bree didn’t speak to him or respond when he tried to kiss her after exchanging Bailey to her arms. She made her way into the restroom and pushed down the plastic changing table. Bailey cooed and giggled, waving her arms and legs as Bree strapped her down.
This was a bad one. All the way up her back, it was a clothing changer. Slipping Bailey’s onesie over her head, Bree was careful not to smear the mess. She held her with one hand as she rooted through the bag for another outfit. Deciding that she didn’t want to drag the soiled clothes home, she threw them in the garbage. With the fresh ones out and the new diaper, she wiped Bailey clean, handing her a toy for entertainment so she didn’t try to escape.
It
was one of those that no matter how much Bree cleaned, the stink lingered. Before clothing her baby, she dusted her with powder, hoping that would at least cover it up and planned to bathe her the minute they were home.
Just as she slipped the new pink onesie over her head, the door creaked open and shut. She’d hoped to get out of there before someone came in.
Then a gag. “Wow that smells awful.”
Bree flinched at the voice. Paige. She snapped Bailey’s onesie closed and unstrapped her from the changer. She glanced in the mirror. Paige stood, matching the stare with her reflection, a hand over her mouth and nose.
“I’m surprised to see you here.” Paige lifted an eyebrow.
Bree wasn’t going to respond. She really wasn’t planning to, but her big stupid mouth did anyway. “Why?” She pulled Bailey to her chest.
Paige looked Bree up and down, removing her hand from her mouth, she gave her a smirk. “I figured you’d want to get that baby weight off. Eating ice cream doesn’t help.”
This time Bree didn’t respond, she tossed her bag over one shoulder, Bailey against the other and stalked out of the restroom.
Garrett stood outside the door. The entire right leg on his jeans soaked.
“I’m ready to go.” Bree brushed past him, ignoring Bailey’s ‘dadadada’. Bree was the one that had to do the work, the one that cleaned her after her ‘dada’ fed her something she knew was a bad idea.
“Bree,” Garrett said.
Paying no attention to the table, she went outside, holding Bailey’s head against her to block the wind. It wasn’t a cold wind, though it was October, the heat still hovered over the day. She waited by his car. A rough sports car, he was proud of the rust bucket.
Finally, after what felt like forever, he walked out of the restaurant, with quick long strides. He didn’t look at her. The car unlocked with a beep when he pointed his keys toward it.
Bree pushed her seat all the way forward, and practically had to climb in to get Bailey buckled. If he was so determined for them to be a family why did he get a car that barely held a carseat?
Bailey fussed, twisting and making it harder to strap her in. Her little lip puckered out and her cheeks turned pink. She hated car rides, most of all the ride in this particular car.
“Shhh.” She held her breath until she had Bailey restrained. She felt like the world’s most horrible mom. If she let air hit her throat she knew she’d lose the fight with her tears.
Garrett was in the driver’s side before Bree was able to dip back out and climb in beside him. Bailey’s cries were loud, heart-wrenching. He cranked the engine three times before it started. Bailey wailed the entire time.
It was when they were already on the road that Garrett finally spoke, his knuckles white, gripping the steering wheel and his jaw tense. “What was that about?”
Bree crossed her arms and looked forward. “I don’t fit,” she shouted over the loud engine and baby cries.
“Don’t fit?” He shook his head, not taking his eyes off the steering wheel.
“With your friends, that just isn’t … I don’t fit in.”
“You did last year.”
Bree tilted her head back, letting it fall on the head rest. Bailey’s cries began to slow down, getting quieter and further apart. “Last year, Carly would have been here.” She opened her mouth to say something about Colten, but since Colten was Garrett’s best friend, she didn’t want to bring that up. “Last year was another lifetime.” She glanced over her shoulder.
“We’re all the same people.”
“But I’m not.” She blinked back the tears. “Okay? Nobody else there knows what it’s like to be up all night with a screaming child, to have to go to the bathroom and clean poo up when everyone else can just sit there and hang out.” She shook her head. “That was so embarrassing.”
“She’s a baby. They poop in public.” Garrett lifted his shoulders. “They all understand.”
“It doesn’t matter, because I’m the only one who had to go change the diaper.”
Bailey finally quieted.
“I would have, but it was all over me, too!” Garrett turned toward his house.
“Where are you going?”
“My mom’s watching Bailey for the game tonight,” he said, as if it were a command.
“I’m not going.”
“But it’s at home.”
“I’m sorry, I’m too exhausted from taking care of your child to be your groupie this year.”
Garrett groaned, running a hand over his hair. When he approached another intersection, he whipped the car around so fast she nearly knocked her head on the window.
She didn’t speak again. She waited on him to talk next, but didn’t want him to either. If the conversation kept going, she knew where it would end up. But maybe that’s where it needed to be.
His grimace when he pulled up beside her house was nothing new, but she pretended not to notice.
The door was rotting at the bottom and a shutter hung sideways from a window. But right now, it was home. Though she hadn’t expected him to, he climbed from the car and bent in the back, retrieving Bailey, who stayed sleeping as he propped her against his shoulder.
Bree followed him to the door, where he stepped aside, letting her be the first to enter. No one was home yet. She fished her key out her pocket and unlocked the knob. Pushing the door in, she cringed when the smell of stale smoke hit her. The room was dark, with the curtains drawn, and Bree reached over to flip on the light. She stood with her back against the door as Garrett walked in.
“You want her in the crib?” He whispered, but still didn’t look at her.
“Yeah.” She followed him through the dingy room. Diet Coke cans and wine bottles overflowing with cigarette butts decorated the coffee table. Magazines were strewn across the sagging sofa. Bryson’s Legos and video game controllers left, forgotten in front of the television. She hated that Garrett had to see this, that she hadn’t had time to do a quick sweep through of the place before he came in.
At least the bedroom was a little better. Maggie’s bed was left unmade, and her pajamas were in a pile in the corner of her side of the room, but nothing was out of place on Bree’s side.
She stood by the bed, watching with her arms across her chest as Garrett eased Bailey down. She let out a small squeak, and he patted her back with a ‘shhh’. Once he was satisfied she was going to stay that way, he turned toward Bree. He shoved his hands in his pockets, his shoulders lifting. When he glanced up at the ceiling, a lump swelled in her throat. It was like time stopped. This was it. She had to do it.
“I …” she said at the same time he opened his mouth to speak.
They both stopped.
“Go ahead.” He nodded toward her.
“No, you,” Bree said, though she really didn’t want him to go ahead. She didn’t want him to say anything that would change her mind.
He scratched the back of his neck. “Never mind.” He tilted his head. “What were you going to say?”
She started to open her mouth when the thought of his game tonight came to mind. “I … nothing.”
He looked down and scuffed his tennis shoe across the hardwood floor. Bringing his face back up to her he said, “I hate that you and Bailey live here.”
“That’s not your choice,” Bree took a step back, like they hadn’t been over this enough.
“But it should be. This place isn’t fit for a sixteen-year-old.” He nodded toward Bree then turned to Bailey’s crib. “Let alone a five-month-old.”
“Six months, Gare, she just turned six months,” Bree whispered.
“That’s not any better and you know it.”
“You’re her dad. You should know how old she is.”
Garrett growled and placed both hands on the top of his head. “Would you stop?”
“Would you?”
He let out a sigh, the little light piercing through the window cast a yellow strip across his jaw.
; “I’ve told you before, I’m the one taking care of her, not my mom. I’m also able to take care of Bryson while I’m here, too.”
“But Bailey needs to come first.” He held his hands out in front of him as if he wanted to shake her.
“She does.” Her voice cracked as it left.
Bailey squeaked again, making them both pause and look at her. They waited for her to stir more … nothing.
“I was going to wait until after the game, but I think we need to take a break,” she whispered, looking at Bailey asleep in the crib.
“Are you saying you want to break up?”
Bree turned her eyes toward him. “I don’t know.”
“Whatever.” Then he was gone, stalking out of the house.
Bree thought he’d put a little more fight up for her, but she shouldn’t have been surprised. No one had ever fought for her, not her mom when she was little and taken away, not her dad when he kicked her out of the house. So why would she expect Garrett to?
When she heard his car rev up, she fell back on her bed. Holding a hand to her face, she couldn’t remember a time when her parents didn’t fight and hate one another. She didn’t want the same for Bailey.
Chapter Thirteen
“Raiders lost tonight. Garrett played horrible,” Khloe’s voice chimed through the phone.
“So?” Bree pulled clothes out of the white laundry basket and shoved them in the drawers, because when you’re a teen mom, what else do you have to do on a Friday night?
“So, rumor has it you dumped him right before the game. You made him choose football or you.”
Bree switched the phone from one ear to the other, clamping it between her shoulder and head as she folded Bailey’s purple and pink striped sleeper. “That’s not true.”
“You didn’t dump him?” Khloe gasped. “Did he dump you?”
“I think I broke up with him, but not because of football.” Bree paused when Bailey wiggled in her crib. Bree might regret letting her sleep so long.
“Why?” Khloe squealed like a chipmunk.
“We need a break.” Bree’s heart ached when she looked at the photograph sitting by her bed. She didn’t know why she tortured herself. She should have put it away.