by Emily Camp
“But you have a baby together. You’re such a cute family.”
“We’re teens.” Like she needed to remind Khloe.
“True, but you guys are like the school fairytale couple.”
Bree let out a laugh at this. “Hardly.” She could only imagine what the school would be saying about her on Monday morning.
She had a notion not to even show up. Her mom wouldn’t make her go. Garrett was loved by the whole school, so of course she would be the bad guy.
The door flew open, the handle rattled when it hit the wall. A cloud of cigarette smoke floated in as Maggie hurried through the room with her nose in her phone.
Bailey belted out cries immediately.
“Maggie!” Bree shouted. “I’m sorry Khloe, I’ve got to go.” She hung up without even waiting for a response.
Maggie batted her brown eyes up at Bree, a white sucker stick poking from her mouth and her ponytail spouting out of the top of her head. “What?”
“You woke Bailey.” Bree lifted her from the crib and pulled her against her chest. “Shhh,” she said as she bounced her.
“I did not.” Maggie pulled the glossy, bright blue sucker out and fell to her bed on her stomach her hands cradling the phone and elbows sinking into the puke-green blanket that was retrieved from a neighbor’s yard sale earlier that day.
“You did, and is mom smoking in here?” Bree glared over her shoulder out the door.
“Yes.” Maggie twisted the sucker stick in between her teeth.
Bree rushed to the living room where, sure enough, Mindy lay across the couch with a cigarette between her fingers, her other hand draped lazily above her head.
“Mom,” Bree said.
Mindy either didn’t hear her, or chose not to as she stared at the hot and heavy soap opera. “MOM!” Bree shouted, feeling horrible when Bailey’s arms flinched straight out.
The only things Mindy moved were her eyes, rolling them in the back of her head. “Breanna.”
“You told me you weren’t going to smoke in here.” Bree hurried toward the kitchen. Bailey had to be hungry.
“It’s my house, I have the right to smoke inside if I want.”
Bree bit her lip as she reached into the fridge, pulling out the bottle she was thankful she made while Bailey slept.
“I don’t want smoke around Bailey.” Bree placed the bottle in the microwave.
Mindy let out an exaggerated sigh. “I swear, you girls are a pain. Maggie walks around here like she hates the world and you … I just can’t do anything as good as you. Why couldn’t I have had all boys?” She sat up, her bare, wrinkly feet flat on the dingy carpet, leaned forward, and dropped her cigarette into the Diet Coke can on the coffee table. “Happy now, drama queen?”
Bree had to remind herself who she was here for, it wasn’t Mindy. The microwave beeped and Bree retrieved the bottle, giving it a good shake. She dripped a little milk on her wrist. Perfect. Not too hot, not too cold. For Bryson, she could do this.
That’s when she realized she hadn’t seen him. “Where’s Bryson?” She placed the bottle in Bailey’s mouth. Bailey suckled like it’d been days since her last bottle.
“Oh my god, you are worse than your little brother. Can you not see I’m trying to watch this?” Mindy’s raspy voice waved toward the television.
“Where is Bryson?” Bree asked again.
“I don’t know. Outside somewhere.”
“It’s after ten.” Bree rocked back and forth with Bailey greedily suckling. Her chubby hands grasping the bottle.
“It’s not a school night.” Mindy reached for the smashed pack of cigarettes as she scratched her chest.
“I’m going outside.” She held her hand up when Bree glared.
“Find your son.” Bree removed the bottle from Bailey’s mouth and put her to her shoulder, patting her on the back.
“Who’s the parent here?” Mindy’s voice was flat as she shuffled toward the door.
Bree wanted to snap back at her that she needed to start acting like the parent, but she knew it would only cause more unneeded drama she couldn’t handle after the day she had.
“Maggie,” Bree pushed in the bedroom. Bailey let out a small burp. Bree hoped her sister would do this one thing for her.
Maggie sat up, pulling the sucker out of her mouth with a pop. “What?”
“Can you feed her while I look for Bryson?”
Typical of her, she sighed, but then, to Bree’s surprise, removed the sucker from her mouth and sat her phone and the candy on her dresser.
“Thank you.” Bree lowered Bailey to Maggie, who cradled her on her folded legs.
Bree hurried outside, where Mindy sat on the front stoop. “Did you find him?”
“Breanna, you really need to take a chill pill.” She waved her cigarette in the air. “I have a few if you want one.”
Bree closed her eyes and took in a deep breath. Why did that not surprise her? “Bryson!” Bree shouted as she began to make her way around the neighborhood. She knew it was late, and she knew that she could be waking people up, but a ten-year-old had no business running around the in the dark. “Bryson!” Her heart thundered as she continued down the street. “Bry!”
“Bree, what are you doing?” Garrett’s voice shouted over his low motor, pulling up beside her.
“I can’t find Bryson.” She managed to say through the fear gripping her throat like a vice. “Bryson!” her voice became hoarse.
Garrett pulled off the road, and he was out of the car before Bree knew what was happening. “Bree,” his arm reached around her and she hated the comfort it brought, but welcomed it at the same time. “It’s all right. We’ll find him.”
“What if I don’t? The whole reason I moved in here was to take care of him, and here I am failing.” Just as the jumbled words left her mouth, she heard a blood piercing scream. If Garrett wouldn’t have been holding her, she would have fallen. Her legs giving out under her.
She ran in the direction of the cries. Bryson lay on the sidewalk in front of rickety concrete steps leading up to a deteriorating, white two story house. Several boys obviously much older than him, scattered at Bree and Garrett’s sudden appearance.
“Bryson, you’re in big trouble.” She fell to her knees beside him, taking his small frame in her arms. He wailed like Bailey as he held his elbow.
“Bree, let me look at him.” Garrett dropped beside her.
Bree loosened her grip on Bryson just enough for Garrett to take him from her. The moon and the flickering street lamp didn’t give them much light to see, but enough to illuminate his strong jaw line and soft mouth. She watched as Garrett talked soothingly to Bryson, taking his arm in his hand. He smelled like shampoo.
“It might be broken,” Garrett said.
“What?” Bree’s heart hammered in her chest.
Garrett pushed himself off the sidewalk with Bryson in his arms. “I can take him to the hospital.”
Garrett sat Bryson, who continued to sniffle, in the passenger seat of his car, though it wasn’t a long walk Bree sprinted back.
When they pulled up, Mindy rushed to the car with the orange glow floating from her hand. “What happened?”
Now she’s worried.
Garrett looked at Bree. “You should probably stay here with Bailey.”
Bree nodded, out of breath.
“Can somebody tell me what’s going on?” Mindy held a hand on her hip.
“Garrett thinks he broke his arm.”
“Oh no.” Mindy covered her mouth, eyes wide. “Let me get shoes.” She held the cigarette in the air.
Bree’s breath finally evened out. She leaned into the car, placing her elbows on the open window. “Thank you,” she whispered.
“It’s not a big deal.” His warm hand covered hers. He leaned forward just enough Bree could feel his breath in her ear. “I love you.”
She didn’t know why she couldn’t say it back. Instead of telling him she loved him, too, she backed
away with a slight nod.
Her mom rushed out of the house, pushing her feet into her flip-flops and tossing her long sliver purse over her shoulder.
She didn’t speak to Bree as she climbed in the front seat, placing Bryson on her lap and coddling him. Bree tried not to be irritated by the fact that, not more than ten minutes ago, Mindy didn’t even care where Bryson was. Now she babied him because he was hurt.
***
When lights traveled across the dark wall, Bree hoped it was Garrett, back with her brother.
Car doors echoed through the room, faint over Bailey’s screams. She retrieved a bottle from the microwave. Bryson and her mom shuffled in. Bree’s heart sank at the sight of his little arm in the sling.
When Parker walked in behind them, brown grocery bags in each arm, her heart hurt. Did Garrett not want to see her? Why did he come over after the game?
Bailey’s bottle was warm and ready. Trying not to seem too disappointed, she place the milk in Bailey’s tiny mouth. Why didn’t Garrett let her know he was going home?
“Can I get ice cream now?” Bryson’s loud squeaky voice made Bailey startle and squall. Bree shushed her and bounced, holding the bottle back in her mouth.
Parker sat the bags on the mustard colored counter. Bailey’s cries dissipated as she began to eat again.
“I don’t think you need ice cream,” Mindy’s raspy voice replied.
“But Parker said I could,” Bryson whined.
Bree caught Mindy just as she lifted the lighter to the cigarette between her lips. “Mom, the cigarette.”
Mindy rolled her eyes and dipped back outside. Bree lowered herself onto the sofa, nearly sinking to the floor.
“Where’s the bowls?” Parker asked. Just as Bree turned around to tell him, one of the old wooden chairs scrapped across the linoleum floor. She watched as Bryson scaled the kitchen counter.
Parker’s eyes met Bree’s, his mouth twitching into a smile, probably thinking the same thing she was. Bryson pulled a plastic cereal bowl from the cupboard, handing it to Parker with his good arm.
“Wow, you’re tough.” Parker shuffled Bryson’s dark, shaggy hair.
Bryson’s smile beamed as he slid off the counter, back onto the chair, and finally the floor. Parker chuckled, pulling the ice cream, Harris Dairy, of course, his adopted dad’s company, from the bag. He reached in again, this time pulling out sprinkles, fudge, and whipped cream.
Bryson pushed the chair back to the mis-matched dark table, climbed on, and patiently watched Parker as he scooped the ice cream in the bowl.
Bree removed the bottle from Bailey’s mouth before draping her over her shoulder and patting her back.
“Bree, you want some?” Bryson shouted, like she was several rooms away and not right next to the kitchen.
“Indoor voice, dude.” Parker nudged Bryson’s good arm.
“No thanks.” Bree cradled her phone in one hand, Bailey still cradled in the other. Why didn’t you tell me you went home? She typed. Her thumb hovered over the send button for a second before deleting it. She’d broken up with him. He didn’t owe her an explanation.
By the time she finished her bottle, Bailey was back to sleep after crying almost the entire time her mom and brother were gone. Bree eased up, careful not to stir Bailey.
Maggie sat in the middle of her bed, still on her phone, now plugged into the wall. She eased onto her bed, not even bothering with trying to put Bailey back in the crib.
She didn’t know why she tortured herself and scrolled through the pictures on her phone. One of Garrett holding Bailey above his head, Bailey’s gummy smile wide. The next one an attempted self portrait of all three of them. He was wearing his Raiders hat, holding Bailey in between them. Bailey’s chin was cut off, so were half of Bree’s face and the top of Garrett’s hat so only the bottom of the R was visible.
Tears slid down her cheeks as she finally had the chance to process everything. Though she didn’t think she made the wrong decision, it still hurt. The next picture was the three of them again, taken the same time as the previous, only in this one, Garrett was kissing her cheek and Bailey’s lips were puckered and eyes scrunched like she was getting ready to wail.
Bailey stirred, Bree held her breath. If she stayed still enough, Bailey wouldn’t wake, as long as she was on Bree’s chest. Though this allowed Bree to get some sleep, it wasn’t quality.
She glared over at Maggie, who didn’t have to be up, yet was. “Maggie,” she whispered as she sat her phone screen down on the mattress beside her, so she wouldn’t be tempted to look at Garrett’s picture.
“Hmmm?” Maggie thumbed away on the cell.
“Who you texting this late?” Bree whispered.
The phone screen cast a blue light on Maggie’s face. “Do you know Jake Porter? He’s in your class.”
“Yeah, I know Jake.” Then it all came back to her. The ice cream place earlier. Everyone talking about the new girl Jake liked.
“Ava said he was asking about me at the after game party.”
“Ava’s a freshman, what’s she doing at a party? She goes to Garrett’s church.” When did it become Garrett’s church and no longer hers?
“You went to parties when you were a freshman.” Maggie stared back down at her phone.
“And look where I am.” Bree patted Bailey on the diaper when she squirmed.
“Most people use birth control.” Maggie’s whole body bounced as she typed. Bree hated that she wasn’t a better example for Maggie. Maggie then squealed. “It’s him. Ohmigosh!”
Bree closed her eyes leaning her head back to rest on the headboard. It wasn’t all that long ago Bree felt that way about Garrett’s texts. It could have been a million years ago, though, the way things were now.
There was a light knock on the door and Bree let out a quiet, “Yeah?”
The door eased open and Parker peeked in. “I’m gonna take off. You two need anything?”
“Sleep.” Bree laughed, patting Bailey again.
Parker smiled. “Can’t help you there.” He turned toward Maggie, who was bouncing with her nose pointed to her phone. “Who’s she talking to?”
“You don’t want to know.” Bree was too tired. She’d deal with everything in the morning.
Chapter Fourteen
A knot formed in Bree’s throat when she answered the door. When Garrett showed to pick up Bailey yesterday, after Bree was done babysitting for friends of his parent’s, their daughter who was a few months older than Bailey, he barely looked at her, let alone said anything.
Now, he stood on the cracked concrete stoop, Bailey on his hip and pink diaper bag over his shoulder. Bryson’s video game blared behind her. How he could play with one hand was beyond Bree, but he’d found a way.
“Dadada,” Bailey jabbered and reached for Bree.
“No, I’m mama. Say mama.” Bree adjusted Bailey on her hip.
Bailey held her hands together. “Dada.” She scrunched her nose and smiled.
“That’s right. Daddy’s your favorite.”
Bailey turned and reached her little arms out for him.
He took her back, leaving Bree feeling insufficient, even though she knew she wasn’t. Bailey needed her daddy as much as she needed her mommy.
Garrett held the pink bag out for her. When Bree and Bailey were first brought home from the hospital, he groaned and complained about having to carry it. Whenever he dropped her off it was the first thing he shed.
A lump formed in her chest when his hand brushed against hers. It wasn’t like it’d been long, but it felt like it’d been forever.
“Bryson, can you turn that down?” She shouted over her shoulder and stepped aside, letting Garrett in. Thankfully, her mom wasn’t home. Knowing Garrett was bringing Bailey over in advance, she’d had the time to clean, tossing out the magazines, cigarette butts, wine bottles, and soda cans. She was lucky the vacuum ran for as long as it did, completely stopping before she reached the far corner. She made a note f
or herself to have Parker look at it the next time he was over. There was still a faint hint of stale cigarette lingering in the air. The Febreeze she sprayed masked most of it. Maggie and Bryson gagged on the flowery fog, but Bree wanted to make sure it smelled fresh before Garrett brought Bailey home.
“She had some mashed potatoes and my mom gave her a bottle before we left. Shouldn’t be hungry for a while.” Garrett didn’t look at her as he spoke. His eyes roved around the room. When he finally landed on Bryson he said, “Hey, how’s the arm?”
As if Bryson had no clue Garrett would be over, he turned with a hop his eyes wide. “Garrett!” Then barreled toward him, arm hanging in the sling. “Can we play football?”
“How you gonna throw?” Garrett ruffled Bryson’s hair.
Bree was thankful that was another thing that got done without Mindy or Bailey there to disrupt. She was able to get Bryson to take a shower, though it was a challenge with the arm. She’d covered it with a plastic bag before he got in.
Bryson hopped, swinging his good arm through the air. “I can use this one.”
Bailey giggled from Garrett’s hip, that cute belly laugh that made everyone smile.
Bryson stopped and tilted his face up. “She always laughs at me.”
“Dadada.” She reached a hand out for Bryson.
He wrinkled his nose. “I’m not dada.”
“She calls everybody dada. That’s all she can say.” Garrett knelt down beside Bryson.
“Bry, I’m sure Garrett needs to get home.” Bree stepped in. She couldn’t watch this any longer.
Garrett’s eyes met Bree’s for a split second before standing back up. His phone slipped out of his pocket, landing by Bree’s foot. Bree knelt down to retrieve it for him. With Bailey still on his hip she knew what a challenge that was.
Just as she reached it, grasping it in her hand, the screen lit up followed by a smiling picture of none other than Paige. Her perfect white teeth and her blond hair up in a silver bow. Rows of green bus seats behind her. Bree felt her heart stop. She didn’t know how her hand kept from shaking as she held the phone to him.
“Thanks.” His fingers brushed hers as he took it from her. Not realizing what she just saw until he looked down. His phone was on silent, probably from church.