Running On Empty

by Emily Camp

  “I don’t care.” Though she’d sat beside him, she’d kept a distance between them. Her puffy dress ruffled around her, her back ram-rod straight and hands folded on her lap.

  “I don’t think that’s on Netflix yet.”

  This made her giggle and realize it was exactly what she needed.

  “Okay, I know what.” He scrolled quickly, the movie icon’s blipping across the screen until he finally stopped. Her breath hitched. It was her favorite, a retelling of Cinderella. Not only did he remember, but she also remembered how many times she had to fight him to get him to watch it with her. The one time he’d given in, she was big and round and having one of those hormonal, crying days that came with being eight months pregnant.

  “You hate this movie.”

  “Honestly, I’ve never watched it, just pretended to.”

  The opening scene appeared on screen. The room glowed. Garrett stood up, his hair disheveled, the gold bow tie gone and the first three buttons undone on his shirt. He dipped down and held out a hand.

  She felt her cheeks flush and her heart patter. “What are you doing?” She glanced to the side as if they would have an audience in the privacy of his living room or something.

  “I didn’t get to dance with the only one I wanted to at homecoming.” He motioned for her to stand. “C’mon, just one.”

  With her insides fluttering, she placed her hand in his, her nails glossy orange to match her dress. His palm warm and rough, he curled his fingers around hers and pulled her up. She couldn’t hold back the smile creeping across her face as he led her around the coffee table, to a small open area in front of the television.

  Garrett turned toward her, placing his hands on her hips, she lifted hers to his shoulders. Her feet bare on the soft carpet and he in socks, she felt ridiculous, but loved it at the same time, as they began to move along with the actors on the screen, the music filling the room.

  Garrett leaned further into her, pulling his arms completely around her and resting his cheek against her head. Surprised he knew the words, he began singing along with the lyrics. Off key, and husky, his chest rumbled against hers. Even if he didn’t have the voice of a rock star, it still made her melt.

  By the time the music ended, she’d almost forgotten where she was, neither let go. If she did, like the fairytale in the movie, it would be over. It was like he felt the same, because he stayed folded around her.

  “I kissed Paige,” he whispered on her neck.

  Why did he have to speak?

  “I kissed Spencer.”

  “I saw.”

  She pried her cheek away from his shoulder, leaning back to see his face lit up only by the light of the television. “I still love you, and I care about Spencer, but I don’t think like that. It’s just easier.”

  “I know.” Garrett’s hands slid around her back now. “Do you think we’ll ever be like before?”

  His heart beat rapidly against her palm. “I hope.” Her words hung in the air. She wasn’t lying, she wanted things to work between them, but lately everything was messed up. “I don’t think we should jump back into anything right now.”

  “I’ll take that.” He grinned at her, and it was the same grin that made her heart speed up.

  ***

  Bree woke to the smell of eggs and bacon. The room brighter than she was used to as she opened her eyes. The panic of unfamiliarity started to come on her at first, then, getting a better look at the room, the French doors which opened to the back yard, the large flat screen in the corner, the large photograph on the mantle, Garrett and his brothers when they were kids. She was still at the Light’s. How did that happen? She was never allowed to stay. Granted, she was on the sofa, curled up in her gigantic dress, a soft blanket over her. The pillow smelled like Garrett’s room, a mixture of woodsy cologne and baby powder.

  “You’re awake.” Robin stood over her.

  Bree eased up, examining the coffee table for her phone. “What?”

  “Garrett plugged your cellphone in his charger.”

  “How?” As if she didn’t have the words.

  Robin sat beside her in her matching sweat suit. “You fell asleep last night and it was the first time in a long time we’ve all seen you … at peace. I couldn’t wake you and make you go home.”

  Home. Sure, she was staying with Parker, but it didn’t feel like home. Her chest felt heavy as she thought of last night, how relaxed she was, barely remembering lying her head on Garrett’s lap, her eyes heavy, her body warm, mind content.

  Content. Something she hadn’t felt in, she couldn’t remember how long.

  “Listen, I want to talk to you.”

  A sick feeling of dread hit her stomach. She hated when people needed to talk to her.

  “Okay.” She managed through the lump in her throat

  Robin glanced down at Bree’s dress, which now, in the light of day, made her feel ridiculous. Robin wiped her hands over her thighs before speaking. She’d never seen Robin this uncomfortable and it worried her something was wrong.

  “Randy and I have been talking.”

  “Okay.” What about? Bree didn’t like the sound of it. Did they want to take Bailey away from her? Was that it? It wasn’t like she technically had a place to keep her.

  “Since we’ve known you, you’ve lived in four different places and that’s barely been a year.”

  Bree’s bottom lip began to tremble. She did want to take Bailey.

  “I just want to let you know, right now, Bailey is who we’re concerned about. I mean you and Garrett, too, but Bailey comes first.”

  Bree’s heart thundered in her throat, and she held her lips between her teeth. The one person she thought believed in her was now saying she thought she was a bad parent. Unfit, just like her mother, who also couldn’t find a permanent home.

  Robin rubbed her hands together, staring at coffee table. “We know we’re going to catch a lot of slack for this, but we’ve prayed, and we believe it to be for the best for everyone.”

  “I don’t know.” Maybe it would be for the best. If Bree couldn’t stay in one place for long, how was that any better for Bailey?

  Robin let out a small laugh, “I haven’t even told you yet.”

  “That you want to take Bailey from me?” Bree’s voice shook as she spoke.

  “Oh, no, sweetie, that wasn’t what I was saying at all,” Robin gasped, leaning forward and placing a hand on Bree’s knee. “Declan’s at school and when he and Miley get married in a few months, he’ll be getting an apartment with her. Bree, we want you and Bailey to live with us.”

  The tears that were on the edge of her eyes dripped down her cheek. The air came back to her lungs. “I … I don’t know … I mean ...”

  “You don’t have to tell me today, but please consider it. Parker’s place is only so big with you and Bryson and Maggie. It’d be so much easier with your schooling, too. I’d be there to help when you’re in classes if you decide to do online school or doing homework if you stay where you are.” She nodded. “People are going to talk. I do realize this. Randy and I been speaking to Pastor about this ever since you moved out of Nate and Lexi’s. I knew it was a bad idea, but that doesn’t change what happened. The truth is, our family comes first. You and Garrett won’t be sharing a room and we’ll know that. Who cares what everyone else thinks.”

  “I …”

  “Just do one thing for me, don’t mention it to Garrett. He has no idea, and I don’t want him to sway you either way until you decide. He has a heart of gold, but he can be rash and pushy. Sometimes he pushes you away. But I know he does love you and Bailey. I want this to be your decision, not his.”

  Bree nodded, sniffing and wiping away the tears as they fell.

  “You don’t have to cry.”

  “I’ve never had anyone believe in me like you guys.”

  “You’re like a daughter to us.” She patted Bree again. “Just let us know what you decide. We’d love to have you. In the meantime,
would you like breakfast?”

  Chapter Twenty-five

  The door swooshed open with a thud. Startling Bree, she almost fell off the sofa. Turning toward the commotion, she opened her mouth to gripe at Maggie. Bree had just put Bailey down, it was the first she’d been able to rest all day. But when she caught sight of the pink, tear streaked face, the big sister rose in her.

  “Hey,” Bree stood. With her heart in her stomach, she started toward Maggie.

  “Don’t say it,” Maggie voice cracked, as she made a beeline for the bedroom.

  On her heels, Bree didn’t let her get away that easily. Maggie threw herself face down on the bed, her shoulders shaking with sobs.

  Bree sat on the edge of the mattress. Her hand hovered over Maggie’s back, hesitant to comfort her. “What’s up?”

  This only made Maggie hug the pillow tighter to her face and the cries louder.

  “Maggie,” Bree finally let her hand go to Maggie’s back. “Is it mom?”

  Bree waited for what seemed like forever for the cries to dissipate, and she hated feeling helpless. Almost like when Bailey cried and there was nothing Bree could do to help her.

  Finally, Maggie tapered off with a sniff and rolled over with the pillow still clutched in her hands, she pressed it to her stomach. Maggie opened her mouth, but when nothing came out she shook her head and tears poured again.

  “Mags,” Bree held out her arms, to her surprise, Maggie fell into them, her body racking with the sobs against her. “What happened? Please tell me mom didn’t get to you. She …”

  “It’s not …” Maggie paused as she took in a shaky breath and pulled out of the hug. “Jake.”

  That was all Bree needed to hear. “He broke up with you, didn’t he?”

  More tears poured from Maggie’s eyes. She covered her face with the pillow.

  “I don’t want to say …”

  “Then don’t, okay. You don’t have to say I told you so.” Maggie slammed back down on the mattress.

  “I’m not trying to be mean, but I did try to tell you he cheated on Khloe with Carly.”

  Maggie’s messy hair fell in her face as she shook her head. “Don’t …” And she was in tears again.

  “I’m sorry. He really is a jerk and not worth your tears,” Bree said, trying to make her feel better, but she knew what a broken heart felt like, and it was easy for her to say when she wasn’t on that side of it.

  Maggie’s arm flew across her eyes.

  “We can have Parker beat him up again.”

  Maggie lowered her arm, “Again?”

  Bree shrugged, happy to get her mind off crying. “Actually, I think Jake won that fight. I only saw the aftermath on Parker’s face.”

  Maggie let out a small giggle and sat up, lounging her back against the headboard, eyes still wet, cheeks still pink, makeup smeared. “I kind of knew he was a player.” She bit her bottom lip and looked up at the ceiling. “But I thought I was different.”

  “It’s happened to the best of us.” Bree patted Maggie’s jeans, her knees sticking out of the torn fabric.

  “But it didn’t with you and Garrett. He really does care about you. And Bailey.”

  Bree nodded, closing her eyes and thinking about how horrible she’d been to him lately, and he was still trying to get her to go back with him. She should be the one apologizing to him.

  “All my life … I watched mom be pushed around by men and … and I was determined it wasn’t going to happen to me. That I … that I was better than her. They’d be better to me.” She sobbed again.

  “Maggie, you’re young. You don’t need a guy right now. You can’t control what he did to you. If you don’t want to be like her, if you want to be better than mom, wait a little while before getting into another relationship.”

  Maggie looked down at her hands folded over the pillow that was now cradled in her lap and nodded.

  “Hey, I am sorry about it. The only reason I was so hard on you is because I didn’t want to see you hurt.”

  Maggie tilted her head, her eyes still fixed on her lap. “I’m sorry I went off on you.”

  “We’re past that, right?” Bree nudged Maggie’s shoulder.

  “Yeah.”

  “I know we butt heads way too much, but that’s what all sisters do, right? We still love each other at the end of the day.”

  “Yeah.”

  Bailey’s cries came from her crib, gaining Maggie and Bree’s attention.

  “That lasted longer than I thought.” Bree rose to her feet.

  Maggie’s laugh made her feel better. “We can always count on Bailey to interrupt.”

  Bree bent over the crib and Bailey flung her arms out for her. “Mama”

  Bree gasped. “It’s about time.” She pulled Bailey close to her chest and kissed the top of her fuzzy little head. She smelled like baby powder. After being with Robin all day, she always smelled good.

  ***

  “I’m going to go checkout Indian Acres with my parents next week.” Garrett held out his hands, as Bailey held out her arms and leaned for him.

  Bree actually didn’t mind that news. That school was close. She gathered up Bailey’s bag. “They have a decent football team?”

  “Dada.” Bailey patted him in the center of his chest, right between the two o’s on his Cambrooke football shirt.

  He nodded, tilting his face toward Bailey. “Decent. I don’t really care as long as I get to play football and stay near you two.”

  “Listen …” she started to say at the same time he spoke again. They both stopped.

  “Go ahead.” Garrett looked up at her, a small smile on his face.

  “No, you first.”

  Bailey continued to jabber from his hip.

  “Deciding on where I’m going is a huge deal. I was wondering if you’d come with us.”

  “I don’t know, I’ve missed a lot of school.” Though, with the recent temporary custody thing going on with her mom, Parker may be able to give her permission for that online academy.

  He looked down at Bailey again, who giggled when he made eye contact with her, scrunching her little nose and grabbing at his bottom lip. He leaned his head back, peeling her chubby fingers away from him. “I want you there.”

  Seeing him today, knowing he’d been decent this entire time, she deserved worse. “I’m sorry. About everything.” She’d spent all this time pushing him away, just waiting for him to be like her dad and every man her mom brought home. “I did some things that weren’t fair to you.”

  “I thought I already forgave you?” He gave her a grin and it warmed her insides.

  “You need to know. I’ve been ugly to you, and it … it wasn’t needed. You were a good boyfriend, and you’re great dad.” She stopped to swallow the lump rising in her throat.

  “Thanks,” his grin grew and he leaned forward just far enough to kiss her forehead. Then he glanced back down at Bailey, who seemed to just realize her mommy was still in the room, twisted in his arms reached for Bree.

  “Mama.”

  “Yes, I’m mama,” Bree giggled. Taking her back after handing the diaper bag to Garrett. He slipped it over his shoulder.

  Bailey clapped her little hands together. “Mamamama.”

  ***

  Unlike herself, Miss Monroe’s desk was surprisingly organized today. Miss Monroe sat on the other side, the bun on the top of her head sagging and her shirt rumpled.

  Bree eased into the chair across from her. “I’d like the papers for the online academy.”

  Miss Monroe smiled at her, “I’m so happy to hear that,” she reached down into her desk sliding a drawer open. “Do you have a legal guardian now?”

  Bree shrugged. “I’m gonna.”

  Miss Monroe slid the papers to her. “Care to share?”

  Bree held her books on her lap with one hand while reaching for the application. “Garrett’s mom asked me to move in with them.”

  “Are you back together?”

  “
No,” Bree glanced down at the papers. “But that doesn’t mean we can’t work together, right?”

  “That’s a very mature attitude to have.” Miss Monroe’s desk whined as she shut the drawer, then she folded her hands under her chin.

  “I know what it’s like to have parents that are constantly fighting.”

  Miss Monroe’s smile widened and she lifted an eyebrow. “That’s great. You don’t want to repeat history. A lot of people end up in the same cycle as their parents.”

  “I’m determined not to,” Bree said.

  “Great, there’s just one thing I ask of you.”

  Bree held her breath, she should have known there was a catch. “Yeah?”

  “I want you to come back and visit me. Let me know how you’re doing.”

  Bree allowed herself to grin. “I can do that.”

  Miss Monroe nodded. “I know.”

  When Bree rose to her feet, the weight that’d been on her chest all school year finally lifted and she felt like for the first time in forever that she could get through this.

  Chapter Twenty-six

  “Hi Mr. and Mrs. Light,” the suited up admissions man said as he shook Garrett’s parent’s hands. Then he turned to Garrett, “I’m Alan Hickman, we spoke on the phone.”

  Bree felt her nerves rising from her stomach. Why did she come today? She didn’t even know if she’d be able to make it through community college yet. This might be something that would only make her want what she couldn’t have.

  So far, the campus had been impressive. Clean, quiet, and secluded.

  “This is my girlfriend, Bree, and our baby,” Garrett said.

  His girlfriend? She never agreed to that again. But she didn’t want to correct him in front of everyone.

  Bree nodded and removed her hand from the stroller to shake Alan’s.

  Randy began to ask some questions about the football team as Bree watched the students stroll down the halls that weren’t rushed and crammed like it was in high school. Everyone seemed to know where they were going and not in a huge hurry to get there, with earbuds hanging from their ears, in sweat pants and even pajama bottoms. Every so often, one would stop to greet Bailey.