Renee 3
Page 20
Repositioning her body as much as she could, Carmen aligned her leg with Renee and kicked, the strength exploding from deep within. The force in Renee’s stomach pushed her away. Her hands unlocked from around Carmen’s neck in an effort to break her fall. Watching Renee dive backward, Carmen pushed herself up with her one good arm and stood to her feet. Standing over Renee, she gave the last laugh and shoved her foot into her neck, pinning Renee’s head against the floor. Carmen smiled.
“You’re not so strong, not so scary.”
Renee’s hands grabbed the sides of Carmen’s ankle and tried to lift her foot from her neck. The more she pushed, the more weight Carmen placed on her neck.
“Go to sleep, go to sleep. Oh, I’m sorry, you probably don’t know that song. It was designated only for me whenever our father came around.”
Carmen pushed her foot deeper into Renee’s neck, the blockage of air forcing her eyes to close and her hands to unwrap from around Carmen’s ankle.
“Go the fuck to sleep!” Carmen snarled.
She put her entire weight onto that one leg, her free leg now dangling in the air. Renee couldn’t breathe, and she couldn’t fight. All she could do was allow her hands to hit the floorboard. Seconds before the end, Carmen was pulled from her feet, the room spinning as her body was swung in the air and her face smashed into the wall like a human ragdoll. Her body slithered down to the floor, the lullaby she sang turning against her and now putting her to sleep.
Julian stood over Carmen, his breathing off beat and his eyes twitching. The ropes that once confined him were no more than a puddle beneath the chair he was once tied to.
* * *
The smell of the Jeep never changed. The stale scent of death infested the seat cushions, and the scratches plunged inside of the car doors tattooed the interior. The Jeep was always quiet, and when you sat in its seats, you agreed to its code of silence. You’d drive through the streets and look out of its windows at people who couldn’t make out your face from behind the tint. It was a moment stuck in time you’d never get back. A moment you’d hold on to but lock away in your subconscious.
Renee looked out the window, rocks from beneath the tires exploding in every direction. She saw nothing. It was the darkest hour of the night, and they drove through dirt as smoothly as the dirt path allowed. Renee looked to her left and temporarily watched Dane, who was in her own little world while playing chauffeur. Julian sat behind Dane’s seat, his posture never changing during the thirty-minute drive. Renee laid her head back, her discolored skin a goodbye gift from Carmen. She closed her eyes. This was peace. This was the end of a life she had chosen but didn’t truly want. Happiness did not come from misery. It came from deep within, and if Renee were ever to achieve it, she had to allow the positivity in. She had to live life on God’s terms.
And then the banging started. Carmen would not let go of the rhythm she had adopted since being thrown into the trunk. Renee’s eyes opened, and annoyance filled her irises. Dane sped up. Her increase in speed warned Renee and Julian to hang on. Abruptly, the car stopped short, and a large bang surged from the trunk of the car.
Carmen’s impaired shoulder took another hit against the car’s interior for a third time. Her eyes shut, and her lips trembled. The tears against her cheeks were dry and white. Carmen’s body felt like a piñata. She was beaten, bruised, and worn on the outside. Every time she was hit, her banging for help seemed equivalent to moving a mountain.
Once silence was yet again obtained, Renee closed her eyes and enjoyed the ride. This was why Carmen was in the position she was in. She didn’t know the rules, didn’t care to learn them, and damn sure didn’t respect whatever knowledge she gained. It was an unwritten rule for silence to occur whenever Dane was behind the wheel of the big black Jeep. This was a job that was long overdue. So while driving to their destination, the three wanted nothing more than to savor the moment and look forward to what was about to occur.
When the car came to a halt, the cold night’s air knocked softly on the windows. Each door opened, and without looking behind them, Renee and Julian walked forward with a total of three shovels. The crackling sounds of twigs and hard stones created music sinking underneath their feet. Standing beside the burial plot, the two waited for a kicking and uncontrollable Carmen to appear. Carmen’s eyes enlarged when Dane forced her tied upper body to walk up to the six-foot hole.
“Let me go. Let me the fuck go!” she wailed. Carmen’s body twisted and turned. She fought against the discomfort splashing through her body and the cold weather nipping at her open wounds. “I’ll leave. I’ll go somewhere far away so you’ll never see me again. I promise!” she pleaded. Tears raced down her cheeks. Salt burned where her skin once covered. “Please! Please! Renee, I’m your sister!”
There was no casket in the ditch, only dirt. Carmen knew what was to come, and her heart couldn’t slow its pace. Looking around, her eyes adjusted to the dark and allowed her to see countless headstones throughout the cemetery. She shook, and her legs weakened beneath her.
“Sisters don’t do what you do,” Renee expressed. The frosty tone of her voice withered away, and for once, she gave her heart permission to speak. She looked Carmen in the eye. When Carmen met her stare, the corners of their mouths dropped, and their eyes twinkled with tears ready to escape. However, each was held hostage by the woman whose body they belonged to.
“I wanted a sister, and I’m sorry she couldn’t have been you,” Renee honestly admitted.
Although Renee wasn’t excited when she first met Carmen, it was a soothing feeling to have a relative around. Renee always wanted family, so when she looked at Carmen, there were times she saw Page and hoped to form a sisterhood, something she didn’t have with Page. It would have taken a lot to have gotten to that point, but secretly Renee was ready to put in the effort. However, none of that happened. Carmen didn’t want to live in harmony. She wanted to live in selfishness, and that one quality was what destroyed a beautiful sibling bond that could have been.
Carmen broke down, and her heart shattered. Could things have been different if her intentions had been pure? Could she have had it all and then some? Did she kick herself out of having a happy, family-united life? Could there have actually been hope for her? And if so, had she turned it away during her race to achieve the material things in life? For as long as Carmen could remember, she always wanted her father. She always wanted her family to be complete and for her father and Madison to live with her. Now looking at Renee, her older sister, who was fighting back her emotions, she realized she had chosen anger over love. Looking into her eyes, Carmen asked lastly, “Can you give me another chance?”
It was an honest question, a hard question, but nonetheless, a question that needed to be asked because it was asked from the heart.
“No,” Renee whispered.
Her answer was low and barely audible, yet everyone heard. Carmen nodded her head, not because she agreed with Renee’s decision, but because she knew, had the shoe been on the other foot, she too would have answered no. Standing tall, Carmen flushed out all her emotions and repented her sins out loud. She now understood the definition of true happiness, and although these were her last seconds on this earth, she’d live them right. After asking God for forgiveness, she looked back at Renee, then at Julian and Dane.
“I’m sorry,” she told them.
By the heavy rope holding Carmen’s wrists behind her back, Dane shoved her into the hole. Crashing into the dirt, Carmen felt her arm snap. She opened her mouth and howled, dirt racing into her mouth from the wall of dirt her face was pressed up against.
In the fetal position, Carmen alternated between crying and screaming in agony. With the same shovel Carmen killed with, Dane used to cover her in dirt. It took a long time for the hole to be filled, but eventually, it was. Sweating and covered in dirt, Julian and Dane dragged their shovels back with them to the car. Walking slowly behind them, Renee stopped and listened closely. It was low, very low,
but Renee could still hear her sister yelling for help.
Chapter 34
Two Years Later
Calm. That was a word Renee hadn’t used or experienced in a long time. The clear Tahiti water rocked back and forth. From behind her sunglasses, she finally saw the view of the ocean that was normally achieved only when receiving a postcard that read, “Wish you were here.” Renee dug her feet into the hot sand and welcomed the therapeutic feeling it gave her toes. Julian’s thick hand held hers, his thumb rubbing her hand. Renee took in the love, releasing what had been and appreciating what was.
“What are you thinking about?” Julian asked tenderly.
“Nothing. For once, nothing.” She closed her eyes, reopened them, and felt a wave of positivity. She thanked God for this moment, for her strength, and more importantly, achieving happiness. “Once upon a time, it would have been something related to business, but now it’s nothing, absolutely nothing.” Peace of mind was a rare ingredient of life. It was delicate, desired, and often mistreated, but when handled with care, it was a blessing.
“Are you nervous about returning to the States?” Julian asked, her reflection filling his sunglasses.
“A little, but I think Nancy has everything under control.” Renee smiled. “She filled my shoes quite nicely.” The thought of a white girl being her protégé stretched her smile out farther. The vision Renee had pertaining to who would fill her shoes had become fully reconstructed after time spent with Nancy. Nancy’s personality traits revealed to Renee that she needed someone out of the box, a fresh, unpredictable dictator for the drug world.
Nancy was a rare breed, capable of changing a game that hadn’t been shaken in quite some time. She was hungry, held a colorful personality that kept her off the radar, and was heavily underestimated, let alone never perceived as a contestant in the drug business because of her gender and race. Everything about Nancy that made the underworld turn up their noises was what made Renee select her. That and she was business savvy. Renee preferred to walk away with nothing except the shirt on her back, leaving the past in the past. However, as a show of appreciation and ongoing loyalty, Nancy demanded that Renee receive a percentage of her earnings paired with monthly updates. She had taken the word “protégé” to new heights.
“I agree. For once, I’m happy with your decision on who will take over.” Julian smiled, comfortable in the fact that this time he had a say in what transpired due to Renee’s exit. A brief flashback on his reaction to Renee crowning Carmen her protégé came to mind.
Renee laughed. “Don’t remind me. I was hesitant at first. Nancy was a stranger, but then again, so was Carmen, so I saw no reason not to give someone I wasn’t related to a shot. Nancy’s proven to be a good addition to the team in ways we hadn’t even expected.”
Julian nodded his head, his finger gliding over the two-carat diamond square ring on Renee’s ring finger.
“Na, this ring is a good addition to the team, and this honeymoon is the icing on the cake.”
Renee took her sunglasses off and smiled at him. Finally, she was happy.
Discussion Questions
1. Did you agree with Dane and Metro’s reasoning for dethroning Renee?
2. If only one of the twins could have survived, who would you have liked to see live and why?
3. When meeting Madison, did you believe she was sincere or another snake in the grass?
4. If you could have kept one character in this novel from dying, who would it have been and why?
5. Do you believe Raquel was justified in telling Dane where Carmen lived?
6. Did Jared’s death surprise you? Why or why not?
7. What ran through your mind while reading the HIV club scene?
8. Would Renee have been better off had she left the game alone when Dane and Metro dethroned her?
9. Do you think Madison was too hard on Carmen?
10. How did you predict this book ending?
About the Author
Born and raised in New York City, where she lives with her husband, Brandie Davis-White graduated with a bachelor’s degree in English from York College and is the founder of My Urban Books blog and Facebook book club. From home, she continues to pen drama-filled novels.
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