The Coldest Winter Ever

by Sister Souljah

  Midnight understood and accepted his agreements. He was loyal. He did not get mad that Santiaga had his own business and made more money than him. He did not compete with Santiaga as a man, or use Santiaga’s contacts and business associates against him. He did not do half the job then quit in the middle. After he learned the job, he did not cut Santiaga out and open his version of the same business. He didn’t dime Santiaga out. He did not use Santiaga’s personal weaknesses or confidances against him. He remembered the order of things. He remembered that Santiaga was the boss. He appreciated that Santiaga created, then extended the opportunity to him. Even when Midnight’s job was over and his obligations dissolved, Midnight demonstrated the depth of his understanding that appreciation means a whole lot more than simply speaking the words “thank you.” Midnight embraced the responsibility of demonstrating his appreciation by adopting and securing Santiaga’s two daughters, Mercedes and Lexy.

  Midnight is emotional, as every man should be. Emotions and the ability to really feel should never be a contradiction to masculinity. America advances the image of the unfeeling man’s man, who can act without emotion. America promotes emotion in a man as a weakness. However, this is not an African belief or trait. While young misguided black boys follow the American mis-lead, many of them are in the process of depressing their mothers, avenging their fathers, and attacking their own kind. In fact, in America, when a male youth displays emotion, the misguided majority labels him “soft.” In order for young men to prove that they are not momma’s boys, they don’t listen to or heed their mother’s good guidance and advice. In an effort to prove to their fathers, whom many never do meet, that they don’t miss, need, or love them, they grow a hatred, lack of respect for, and suspicion of all males. This hatred makes murder possible, then easy. In an effort to prove that they are America’s version of “strong,” black male youth say, “I don’t love them hoes.” Then the process of labeling and diminishing all of their women begins.

  Midnight, on the other hand, has a clear respect for and love of his mother. He admires how she chose to live her life. She mattered, her words and his memory of her. He looked for the qualities of his mother in the women he chose to spend his time with. He explains in the novel that Souljah reminded him of some of the qualities of his mother in many ways, one of his points of attraction to her. He does not regard women as whores to be taught a lesson. He was able to love and appreciate a good woman, an art that is becoming shamefully rare. Midnight’s respect for and emotion toward women is what led him to murder a youth who attempted to rape his biological sister in a dark stairwell of a building. After serving five years in prison, and in honor of his mother’s wishes, he took responsibility for his sister, who was lost in the adoption system after their mother’s death.

  Throughout the novel Midnight is protecting and saving women. His ability to listen to a woman when she speaks (not obey, but listen), is what actually allows him to hear, consider, and feel what Sister Souljah says and writes to him in their letters. Many men may have thought that it is “soft” for a man to be guided by a woman. However, in the ancient African tradition women are the sacred key to life. They carry, then push all life into existence. They are a metaphor for wisdom.

  Midnight’s ability to have emotions, yet not allow his emotions to emasculate or master him, is the kind of mental wellness all women wish for their husbands, fathers, brothers, and sons. It is this careful balance that allows Midnight to feel, then adjust and change. Many hustlers who have a positive change of mind, spirit, and heart may feel they’re turning soft or lowering themselves when they move from an illegal business like drugs, where money is fast, long, and strong, to a legal business like barbering, plumbing, or construction, where money comes at a slow and steady pace. However, a man who is in charge of his own thoughts and feelings will soon realize that if you love anyone at all, and wish to continue to do so, the change from hustling drugs is necessary. A former hustler who makes the change in business has great potential to be productive and profitable if he goes at his new business with equal emotion and passion. If he’s too damn slick for himself, and tries to deal drugs behind the scenes while fronting a legal business, he will fail miserably, mostly without the possibility of freedom and recovery for himself and those he loves.

  Questions concerning Midnight’s relationship with Winter pour in steadily. Both males and females have been perplexed as to why Midnight consistently rejected Winter’s friendship and sexual advances. Many readers argued that Midnight and Winter were a perfect match. This is a common mistake in analysis and assessment. Readers should instead label it a “perfect-looking match.” There is a tendency for males to believe they need a perfect-looking woman. Likewise, women form a picture of what their perfect prince is supposed to look like. In actuality, the only thing that Midnight and Winter have in common is the fact that both of their lives are immersed in the drug world. She is sixteen. He is twenty-one. He is quiet and reserved. She is talkative and wild. He loves books. Winter never read a whole book, or anything else for that matter, including the New York Daily News when it was right there in her face. Midnight loves intelligent conversation. Winter loves gossip. In effect they would’ve had very little to talk about. While he craved modesty in a woman, Winter wanted to be the top showpiece.

  It has been difficult for American males and females to understand how to choose a mate. Certainly it has been even more difficult for them to stay together, build something, and appreciate one another. There is no agreement on what American rules and parameters for dating are. Commonly, American women enter relationships backward, when compared to non-Western women. American girls have sex with handsome strangers, then they attempt to get to know them afterward. The shy American girl will forgo sexual intercourse in the first one or two dates. She’ll opt to give the stranger a blow job to demonstrate her interest in him as well as her modesty!

  On the other hand, a non-American, non-European, non-Western girl or woman must go through a process to even meet a man. Her family guides her encounter. They get to know one another amongst their families and relatives. The couple gets to converse with and consider one another. Both sides assess their intentions, compatibility, and combined possibilities. It would be difficult for Winter Santiaga and even most readers to understand that more than sexual attraction matters between a man and a woman. It will be difficult for them to understand that many men from other cultures actually like and wish to honor their own culture. They enjoy the process it involves to find and then win the hand of a good woman.

  Moreover, when a girl is easy, sometimes she’s undesirable. Real men enjoy working to earn a woman’s attention and admiration. Some men enjoy unraveling the mystery of a particular woman and journeying to see and feel the various prizes and delicacies that are in store. Midnight was born in the Sudan, a country located on the continent named Africa. His view of women was shaped in that land. He carried those views from Africa to America.

  Also involved in Midnight’s relationship with Winter was his self-discipline. Unlike many men who take all that they can get, Midnight chose to evaluate, then step away from women who he thought subtracted something from his essence and success. In a moment of frustration within the story, he said these words to Winter:

  Can’t you read? … That’s what I’m talking about—dumb women! You don’t even know what’s going on around you. If it ain’t on the front page, you don’t know it.

  Midnight’s anger toward Winter may have been his view that she was both arousing and pretty, while being completely useless. His attempt to discipline himself in regard to Winter became that much easier.

  Loyalty factored in as well. Midnight knew that to have sex with Santiaga’s daughter was foul, a breech of confidance. When a man allows you into the inner circle of his life, the unspoken agreement is that you don’t abuse the proximity. It would have been wrong for Midnight to simply satisfy his sexual desires with Winter, then dump her as he knew he would have to, si
nce she was not relationship material, nor was she worthy of ever becoming his wife. Instead he chose to discipline himself. He kept a purposeful distance from her to make sure it all worked out at as it should. In her moment of loss of her mother and father to incarceration, he knew not to take her to Maryland with him. Yet he still showed his humanity and compassion by giving her $3,500 dollars of his own money, despite feeling skeptical about how she would use it. Midnight, in the African tradition, gave Winter Sister Souljah’s business card. He felt an older woman was better suited to help Winter Santiaga improve herself and that a man placing himself in a position to teach a young girl was more likely to mess it up.

  Midnight’s encounter with Sister Souljah sparked the opposite emotions within him. When Souljah first saw him he was reading in the Columbia University library. When he first saw Souljah, she was teaching a class at Columbia University. It was a powerful first impression. It was completely different than a dude saying “Hey, I saw you bending over in the park the day you was rocking a miniskirt.”

  As Midnight and Souljah began to explore one another, they both entered through the mind first. For people who are thinkers, this is very important. Even the pimps admit that “the mind is the most powerful sexual organ.” Souljah and Midnight’s conversation were mutually enticing and intriguing. This does not mean that there was no basic raw sexual pull shared between them. After all, they are both human. They both have deep feelings. However, they did not let the sexual energy lead them. They were led by their thoughts and considerations.

  At a certain point Sister Souljah decided that Midnight was not good enough for her because of his involvement with drugs. By challenging Midnight, Sister Souljah revealed characteristics and qualities that many women, rich or poor, simply do not have: self-reliance, self-assurance, and contentment.

  Many single women are desperate. When they give into their desperation and loneliness their standards collapse. On the other hand, Sister Souljah’s action of separating herself from Midnight said and proved; “Yes, I admire you. Yes, I see you. You’re beautiful and I desire you. However, because you can’t meet my spiritual, cultural, and moral standards, then I cut you off. Because I am certain of and satisfied with myself. I’m sure I will be rewarded in the long run. And no! I am not your ride-or-die bitch who’s willing to trade my life and freedom for yours!”

  Because Souljah happened to be a historian and teacher, she stepped away from Midnight even as she offered up the sentiment, words, and truths that would stick in his mind forever, and raise his standard of manhood. Now Midnight had the choice, to do what a real man loves to do. He had to work to get to where Souljah was at. He had to meet the challenge to make himself a better man.

  Had Sister Souljah been like most women, she would have broken down, bended her rules. She would have allowed him to have sex with her a couple of times in the heat of the moment, in the dark of night. He would have then bought her a nice gift and eventually she would’ve given in and accepted him, broken, in a dead-end occupation and lifestyle. However, Souljah’s clean break from Midnight forced him to have to choose. She realized she was not the only woman in the world and that she might by having the standard set so high, lose him. However, she figured that winning a broken man, one set up for a possible second then third incarceration, slavery, or an early death, was an option she was completely unwilling to accept. To accept this would’ve been to contaminate herself spiritually and to dramatically alter the outcome of her life as well.

  Midnight did the manly thing. He changed. Ultimately he did not change because of Sister Souljah. He changed because he already knew that what he was involved in was wrong. He changed because he had a conscience. He changed because he always had a religion. He changed because he had a culture to which to return. Sister Souljah, therefore, was simply the character who brought about Midnight’s epiphany. She did what no one else in his world would do. She leaned on him to recognize and acknowledge his true self, his purpose. She was the inspiration, that revealed to him that nothing else was more important than his purpose, not his business, money, pretty women, or his justifiable anger.

  Not every man could have latched on to these simple truths, even after meeting a positive and powerful woman who has the patience to break it down for him. Some would simply fall short. A man has to have what is called the “will” to rescue his own soul. Perhaps the most meaningful example of a man rescuing his own soul occurred when Midnight was incarcerated. In his letters to Souljah he admitted that he was raped by some men who physically overpowered him in prison. He admitted that he suffered as doctors placed twenty-two stitches in his behind to initiate the process of the physical healing. He admitted that after the trauma he questioned his own sexuality and how the rape detracted from his sexual identity.

  This is a huge dilemma not only for Midnight, the character, but for black men worldwide. Living in a perpetual state of war, poverty, powerlessness, confusion, and crime creates an immense pressure on the psychology, personality, spirit, and soul of a man. So many men, in a subconscious response to the various and continual pressures of American rule, capitalism, and racism, have lost control over their sexual and gender identity. Some men, in an attempt to adapt and avoid the pressures, become other than their natural selves.

  Midnight, like many boys and men who are victims of either father-lessness, foster care, adoption, incarceration, molestation, rape, abuse, poverty, powerlessness, indoctrination, and misdirection, could’ve surrendered. He would not have had to wave a white flag. He simply would have to lose his internal will to fight back. To give into the pressure that threatens to redefine who each and every one of us are and were born to be as were our mothers and fathers before us.

  Midnight, however, reaches in and reaches back to his understanding of himself, his father, his culture, his God. He uses this ancient foundation to sort through the confusion, to resist the pressure, to rescue his soul. Ultimately he did not allow anyone to cloud what his parents and those before him made clear, that he is a man, the original black man made to love, protect, and provide for women and children. He did not allow any human to soar higher than God and alter his original purpose.

  Midnight therefore represents for all black men, a return to your original purpose. A return to your original culture. A return to your original conscience. A return to being builders instead of destroyers, protectors instead of predators, leaders instead of sheep. He was by no means a perfect man. The fact that he was ever involved in drugs was a critical and undeniable flaw.

  The message of his character is multi-dimensional. In his change for the better, he did not double-cross the individuals from his former life. He fulfilled and completed his obligations. He then isolated, worked, and rebuilt himself. He healed and went back to get everybody else.

  In the end, what Midnight did made him majestic. He demonstrated the ability to make a complete and comprehensive positive change. His ability to learn, understand, grow, and adjust left him wearing the crown that many thought had been reserved for Santiaga.

  CHARACTER ANALYSIS:

  MRS. SANTIAGA

  Mrs. Santiaga is the only character in The Coldest Winter Ever who does not have a name. She is a symbol of incompletion. She represents all of the women who stop learning and growing in this life, the ones who turn into beautiful Barbie dolls.

  You shower most dolls, especially your favorite one, with lots of attention in the beginning. You dress them up in the finest matching doll outfits and accessories. One afternoon you happen to lay her down. Then somehow, she becomes uninteresting, unimportant, and dispensable.

  Years later you notice her, dirty, tattered, and broken, underneath your bed. At that point you may have a quick flash of memory. You smile at having loved her once. But mostly, you just pity her now.

  When a woman has not established her own personal identity, she does not deserve to have a name. A personal identity tells and shows family and friends who you really are on the inside. It comprise
s what you feel, what you think, what you believe, what you are interested in, what gifts you have, what you dislike, what you spend the majority of your time doing, and what you’re working toward.

  Every woman’s personal identity is influenced by others, such as her mother and father, her grandparents, sisters and brothers, and closest friends. However, she must shape finally who she actually is, which will end up being slightly different than who they are.

  When a woman meets a man of interest, she should already be somebody. She should not just be a sitting duck or dandelion waiting to be plucked. She should not be waiting for his ring to turn her into a woman. She should not be waiting for his money, promises, adornments, or lifestyle to turn her into a woman. In fact, if she is clear and whole, her agreement to join her world to his should add something to the equation, instead of her just being absorbed, then blending in.

  Not naming female characters who have not evolved or blossomed into whole women is a literary technique I developed when I wrote my first book, No Disrespect. In that book, which is about the young relationships of Sister Souljah, I never once named myself. Nor did I ever use the Sister Souljah title. I knew that as a young woman, from a teen through twenty-two years old, I did not deserve it. I hadn’t finished the work I needed to do on me. I was not yet a woman.

  What happens when a woman is old enough in age, let’s say twenty-five, twenty-eight, or thirty-three and she still has not blossomed into a whole woman? She has the hips and tits. She has the flirtatious eyes and immaculate hairstyles. She has the manicure and pedicure. She has the Louis Vuitton handbag and the diamond bracelet. She has the husband and the children. But she has the mind of a twelve year old.

  Her limitations, her lack of growth will transfer to her daughters. It will cast her sons out in the world to seek new but maybe less concerned teachers. It will either bore, limit, or run her husband away.