Everything

by Erin Noelle

  I slept almost the entire flight, trying to pass the time as quickly as possible, and when the wheels of the plane touched down on American soil Monday morning, I nearly cheered out loud, crick in my neck and all. The hour we stood in line to clear customs was brutal, and waiting for our luggage was even worse. I was antsy, borderline irritable; I just needed to get home to my truck.

  As soon as I dropped my suitcase off on my bed to deal with later, I snatched the keys off my nightstand and headed out the front door. It was almost noon, I was starving, and I needed a shower in a bad way from the night of traveling, but I didn’t give a shit about anything until after I saw and talked to her. Since she wasn’t supposed to be coming back in town until today with me — she had previously asked for the day off — I expected to find her at her apartment. But as I hauled ass to her place from my house, a drive that happened to take me right by the school, I noticed her red bug in the parking lot in the vicinity she usually parked.

  Puzzled, I continued driving to her place, thinking maybe it wasn’t really her car, but when I discovered her driveway empty, I realized she must’ve gone in to work anyway, since she came home early. “Fuuuuuck!” I roared inside the cab of my truck, as I slammed my palms against the dashboard.

  I couldn’t very well march into the school, especially on a day I was officially absent, and beg for her forgiveness in front of everyone. Glancing at the time on my phone, I saw that I still had three hours before she would be out, so my only option was to go back home and wait for her to get off. More fucking waiting…

  Trying to keep myself preoccupied as I watched the clock creep around to 3 p.m., I ate some lunch, took a much-needed shower, changed into some clean clothes, and then sat down with my guitar and notebook and lost myself in the only other thing that could keep me from losing my mind — my music.

  Finally, it was time. Time to face her. Time to tell her how sorry I was. Time to grovel if I had to. Time to man-up.

  Back in my truck with my sweaty palms gripping the steering wheel, I followed the same route as I had a few hours before, glancing over at the school as I passed by where her car had been parked earlier. And my heart lurched in my chest.

  The car was still there. And she was standing next to it… with Mr. Carroll. Hugging him as he kissed the top of her head.

  Shaking with fury, I made a sharp right at the next street then slammed on the brake and threw the transmission into park. I couldn’t believe how wrong I was. I was a fucking idiot. My instincts had allowed me to fall in love with her, not telling me that I couldn’t trust her. My instincts were shit. Like a chump, here I was worrying myself sick about apologizing to Belle, choosing to listen to Ashlynn and my parents and their lines of bullshit, when she was here obviously having no problems moving on as she snuggled up with Mr. Carroll in the fucking school parking lot.

  Fuck her.

  And fuck him.

  As a matter of fact, everyone could just go fuck themselves.

  I was done.

  MONDAY NIGHT, I finally braved turning my phone back on, and immediately erased all of the missed text and voice messages, as well as the call history, not wanting to deal with any of it. I called my parents and gave them an abridged version of what had happened, leaving out the part about the person I was actually in Buenos Aires with was one of my students. They worried about me enough after everything that had happened with Jonah the first time; they didn’t need anything else to add to that. Plus, now that Everett and I were finished, it really didn’t matter anymore. Lindsey, however, wasn’t buying my bullshit short story about how it was all just a big misunderstanding and that I was fine.

  “I know there’s more you’re not telling me, Belle,” she huffed into the phone, “but I also know you’re only going to do it when you’re ready. So damn stubborn sometimes, I swear.”

  I rolled my eyes as if she could see me. “Linds, please just drop it. I’ve got killer jetlag, and I really just want to go to bed. I promise you I’m more than fine and we’ll get together for a glass of wine soon,” I placated her.

  “Mmhm. There’s that word again… you’re so fine,” she mocked. “Don’t forget I’m a woman too and know exactly what that means, but I’m gonna give you your time and space. You know where I am when you need me.”

  God, I really loved her. A good enough friend to call me on my shit, but even better was that she was letting me handle it my way. I just wasn’t ready to relive it again so soon. The wounds were still too fresh.

  “Thanks, babe. I’ll call you soon, okay?” I said, as I finished picking at the turkey sandwich I’d made for dinner. My stomach still wasn’t too accepting of food, so I thought it’d be best to play it safe with something bland.

  That night was yet another sleepless night as I stressed about seeing Everett the next day. I threw up twice Tuesday morning as I got ready, and I seriously contemplated calling in sick. At least it wouldn’t be a lie.

  Realizing I was going to have to deal with it at some point anyway, I put on my big girl panties and went to work, but I was careful to stay out of the hallways in between classes and during lunchtime. I felt confident he wouldn’t say anything or make a scene in class, but I definitely didn’t want to run in to him outside of that.

  The worst part of the entire thing was how much I wanted to see him. How much I missed him. From our silly text messages, to his cute nicknames for me, to how he set my body on fire with the simplest touch, to the way he made me feel so adored and cherished when he looked at me. I wanted that back, to rewind a week, when everything was perfect. When I was his Tinker Bell in our own Neverland.

  Which unfortunately ended up being as fictitious as Disney’s.

  Sixth period came and went and Everett never showed, even though I saw his truck in its usual spot when I’d left for lunch. The entire hour of class, I waited with bated breath for him to walk through the door, but he never did. Wednesday, another no-show, and then again on Thursday. By the end of school Friday, I was irate. He’d dropped my class. Or did what the high school, teenage version of it was… just stopped coming. Fucking brat. If I had to be there, pretending like nothing was wrong, he should’ve been suffering through fifty-four minutes of awkwardness too.

  I hated that I’d been so wrong about him, that my instincts had been so far off base. I’d honestly thought he was more mature than that, but apparently I was an idiot, blinded by love. It wasn’t the first time it had happened to me, but I damn sure hoped it was the last.

  Stalking out of the building after the final bell rang and the students all left, I was on a mission to get drunk. Screw happy-hour margaritas with all the nosy teachers who couldn’t wait to ask me more questions about Jonah. I needed my own damn bottle of tequila and Lindsey.

  But as luck would have it, when I shoved the door open and stepped outside, Everett did the exact same from the other set of doors about twenty yards away. Our gazes met for a split second and I sucked in a sharp breath, my entire body instantly on high alert. Then, cool as can be, he gave me a chin nod then kept walking toward his truck.

  A fucking chin nod.

  Make that two bottles of tequila.

  “SO, ARE YOU all packed up and ready for the move?” Lindsey asked, as she sat down across the table from me with her basket of food at The Hubcap Grille, a small ma-and-pa-type burger shop down the street from her house. “Have you already gotten the keys to your new place?”

  I nodded as I dipped a French fry in ketchup then shoved it in my mouth. The first French fry was always the best for some reason. “Yep, everything but my clothes for work this week and my toiletries, all of which I’ll just toss in a garbage bag Saturday morning before the movers get there and throw in my car. And I picked up the keys yesterday.”

  It was the Sunday afternoon before the last week of school, and somehow I’d made it through the last two months of living in a place that was littered with memories of Everett, but I couldn’t do it anymore. Even though time had dulled the pai
n and I’d moved on with my normal daily life after everything happened, I couldn’t pretend it still didn’t hurt. That I still didn’t think about him.

  It was time for my fresh start, take two. I’d accepted a teaching position at a local junior college that Liam’s new girlfriend, Alice — who I’d met at a faculty function and hit it off with right away — had helped me land and found a new apartment on the other side of town, close to where I’d be working. The new place meant I’d be a little farther away from Lindsey, but with our standing Sunday afternoon lunch date, I didn’t worry about us falling out of touch.

  “So have you decided what you’re gonna do about the grade?” she asked, glancing up at me as she picked the tomatoes off her burger and put them on my tray.

  I groaned and threw a fry at her face. “Can’t we get through lunch before we talk about this shit? It ruins my appetite.”

  “No, ‘cause you’ll make sure we never get around to it.” She laughed and shook her head. “But it really doesn’t matter. I already know you’re gonna pass him.”

  Scowling, I took a big bite of my bacon cheeseburger, buying me some time for my response.

  Truth was, she was right; I probably was going to pass Everett, even though he’d never come back to class. I mulled over the decision for the last few days, going back and forth over what to do. If I failed him, he wouldn’t graduate, but I doubted he cared much, seeing that he was going on tour with or without a high school diploma. His grades from when he had attended class were high enough to bring his average to just above passing, so without reporting his eight weeks of absences to Principal Gentile after the fact, which would only raise all kinds of questions to why I never said anything beforehand, I couldn’t really do anything except pass him.

  “If I tell them he hasn’t been to class in the last two months now, they’ll ask me why I never said anything before,” I explained, after I washed my food down with a drink of soda. “And his grades are good enough. I told you that he even turned in the research paper that was due a few weeks ago.”

  “Yes.” She nodded then chuckled. “How can I forget the phone call that started with ‘That motherfucker wrote a paper about my favorite artist’?”

  Shrugging, I looked out the window. “Yeah, well, the perks of being my best friend, I guess.”

  “I wouldn’t trade it for anything, Belle,” she said, her tone suddenly subdued.

  My eyes snapped to hers, searching for the reason for the change. “What do you mean?”

  “I mean exactly what I said. I wouldn’t want another best friend in the entire world. You’re fun to hang out with, you have the kindest, most genuine heart of anyone I know, and you put up with me regularly. According to Michael, that’s not the easiest of tasks.” She smiled and winked, then added, “Oh, and I told Adrian you’d go out on a double date with us this weekend.”

  “Lindsey!” I yelled, this time throwing my wadded up napkin at her. “I told you no dates! Especially not him, I don’t care if he’s still STD-free or whatever the hell you’re gonna report to me about his last physical. The answer is no!”

  She scrunched up her nose and stuck out her tongue at me, the seriousness gone as quickly as it had appeared. “Yeah, well, one of the perks of being my best friend is me helping you get over Everett Templeton, so you’re going whether you like it or not.”

  I didn’t respond to her comment; there was no point in it. I knew when she was going to be headstrong about something, and I didn’t feel like bickering with her. We finished up eating a few minutes later, and as we stood up to throw our trash away, I noticed Ashlynn and Scarlett were sitting at a table behind me, clearly in earshot of our conversation.

  My pulse skyrocketed and my chest tightened uncomfortably, wondering how much they’d heard. Without making eye contact with either, I rushed toward the restaurant’s exit. Bursting out the door, I inhaled a lungful of fresh air, and reminded myself, “Just one more week.” And then maybe, just maybe, I’d be able to forget him.

  But even as the thought crossed my mind, I knew that would never happen.

  “EVERETT TEMPLETON.”

  The packed auditorium applauded and cheered as I walked across the stage, shook Principal Gentile’s hand, and accepted the rolled up piece of paper made to look like a diploma. Smiling big, I peered out into the crowd where my parents stood and shouted my name along with Uncle Marcus, my grandparents, and several friends of the family, including all of Jobu’s Rum. I couldn’t believe I was finally graduating, putting the last thirteen years of my life behind me and focusing on what was to come.

  And man, was I ever ready. I needed to get out of that school, out of Houston, so that I could stop being reminded of Belle day-in and day-out. I knew it was a punk-ass thing to do to stop going to her class, but I just couldn’t deal. I loved her too much. The hurt she caused by just walking away and not looking back was unbearable, and forcing myself to sit in a classroom with her for an hour every Monday through Friday would’ve been pure torture. A masochist, I was not.

  Even though I’d managed to get the writing assignment instructions from Scott and had completed the research paper, I was still scared that she’d fail me and keep me from graduating, but that was a chance I was willing to take. If I had to get my GED later, then so be it. I’d rather face my parents during that discussion than being forced to be in her company five hours a week. Chances were I’d do something stupid, like beg her to come back to me.

  “We did it, bub!” Ashlynn exclaimed with a smile that lit up her entire face, hugging me as I slid onto the chair next to her. Since we were announced in alphabetical order, she’d gone just before me. “Now it’s time for the real fun to begin! Do you think LA is ready for us?”

  I squeezed her tightly up against me and kissed her forehead. “I’m not sure anywhere is ready for you, sis, but that’s why I’ll be there.”

  She threw her head back and belted out her always-carefree laugh. “Yeah, between you, Mom, and Dad, I’m sure I won’t be able to wreak too much havoc on the world, but I fully plan on getting you out of this funk you’ve been in.”

  Pressing my lips into a straight line, I turned my attention back to the stage to watch the remainder of our senior class be announced as they crossed the threshold into the next phase of their life, whatever that may be. For me, it would be focusing on what I loved most, the one thing that never let me down, that would never leave me feeling like this again — my music.

  After the last name was called, Principal Gentile asked for all the seniors to stand, gave us her final congratulations and well wishes, and then as some two-hundred and something graduation caps went flying in the air, the ceremony concluded. The scene afterward became a big hugfest between all the students, something I wanted no part of, so I slipped away to the perimeter of the group, searching for my parents.

  Only I ran into Mr. Carroll first, who surprisingly had a cute, blonde twenty-something latched onto his arm. I noticed earlier that Belle wasn’t there — not that I was looking for her or anything — but I found it odd that she didn’t show, and even odder that he was there with someone else. After the day I saw them together in the parking lot, I never saw them together again, but I figured they were just keeping their relationship hidden from people at school.

  She had practice doing that.

  “Everett!” he greeted me cheerfully, with a friendly pat on the back. “I can’t believe it’s been four years. Congrats, lad.”

  I offered a polite smile and nodded. Though I wanted to hate him after I came back from Argentina, I couldn’t. Whatever went down between me and Belle had nothing to do with him, though I still felt funny when I was around him.

  “Thanks, Mr. Carroll, I appreciate it. Can’t believe it’s actually here,” I replied.

  Chuckling, he twisted to the woman next to him and grinned. “Everett here is about to take the world by storm, just you watch. He and his twin sister are getting ready to go on tour with their dad’s band this sum
mer, so the next time I see him, he’ll probably be some famous big-shot rockstar who’s forgotten all about his homeroom and poetry teacher.”

  “Nah, I’m going to be using all those mad poetry skills you taught me for the rest of my life,” I joked lightheartedly, then turned my attention to her as well and offered out my hand. “Everett Templeton, nice to meet you…”

  “Alice,” she completed the sentence, shaking my hand and smiling brightly. “I’m Liam’s, err… I mean Mr. Carroll’s fiancée. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

  My inquisitive gaze cut over to Mr. Carroll, back to Alice, then finally landed on my teacher. “Fiancée?” I asked. “Why didn’t you tell any of us you were engaged, Mr. C? When did you pop the question?” And what the hell happened to you and Belle?

  “Just last Sunday,” he answered, his entire face radiating with happiness as he peered down at her. “It’s all been a bit of a whirlwind. We actually met back in January, when I was out on a first date with someone else, but she ended up getting sick at this place we were at, and as I hung out at the bar waiting for her, Alice and I ended up talking and really hitting it off.” He shook his head, almost as if he couldn’t believe it himself. “I know that sounds terrible, but I knew much earlier in the night that the date wasn’t going to work out, and I’ve since told the woman I was out with, who is now a great friend, what happened. She thought it was hilarious and has been one of our biggest cheerleaders. Actually helped me pick out Alice’s ring.”

  The blonde woman beamed as she held her hand up to show me the sparkling rock. But I was still having trouble processing Mr. Carroll’s words. “So you and Belle aren’t together?” I blurted out, not even thinking about the ramifications of me calling her “Belle” or knowing about their date.