The Blurring

by Angela Peach

  I told her where I lived and she said San was going to drive her straight over, then I sat and waited.

  An agonising thirty five minutes later, during which I didn’t dare move in case something else changed, and there was a knock on the door. I flew across the room to let her in and was so relieved, I fell into her arms sobbing! I felt strangely safe and comforted in her embrace, and held on to her as if my life depended on it.

  “What happened?” she asked into my hair.

  “My car…tell me what car I drive?”

  “I don’t know the make of it.”

  “What colour is it?”

  “Red, why?” she pulled away far enough to look at me. “Has it changed? Like with the name thing?”

  I nodded stiffly, amazed at how quickly she’d guessed.

  “Yes. Yesterday I was driving a blue Vauxhall Astra, and today it’s a red MX6. I think the type of car I drive would be something I’d remember and not get confused about, right?”

  “And this happened overnight?”

  I nodded, and she gave me a hug.

  “Are you ok? You must be so freaked out?”

  I pulled back and narrowed my eyes at her, suddenly curious.

  “Spencer, why do you believe me? I mean, why aren’t you even questioning my sanity?”

  “I don’t know. I just know that I trust you. In the same way, I guess, that you trusted me when I told you I swallowed your soul and stuff” she shrugged, an amused glint in her eyes. “Maybe we’re both crazy, huh?”

  “Maybe.”

  “Um, Tristen? Did you say you called the police?” she said, trying to hide a wicked smile. I smacked my forehead.

  “Oh no! And Nick! Shit! How do I explain this? ‘Sorry, I didn’t see that my car actually was parked outside cos it had changed colour overnight?’ ”

  “At least you didn’t call the insurance company!” Spencer was laughing freely now, and it was so infectious that soon, we were both in hysterics with tears running from our eyes. When we managed to get ourselves under control, she rubbed my arm sympathetically. It felt nice.

  “Aw, look, why don’t you tell the police your boyfriend took it to work without telling you? If you phone them now, it won’t be too bad.”

  I slouched my way over to the sofa and picked up the piece of paper with the crime reference number on. Taking a deep breath, I made the call (and tried to ignore Spencer laughing at me from across the room!) The police weren’t too impressed, and I could tell they thought I was just some dizzy woman! By the time I hung up, my face was on fire and my pride in tatters.

  “Hey, come on, at least they didn’t send someone round to take your details!” Spencer said, leaning over the back of the sofa to hug me compassionately.

  “But I still have a different car, and we still don’t know why! And I was supposed to be at work hours ago! This is one of the worst days of my life!”

  “Can’t you ask for some time off? Just until we know what’s going on?” Her breath was warm on my ear and I almost forgot to answer, distracted as I was.

  “Uh, well I’ve got a two week holiday for my birthday, but it doesn’t start for another six days. I suppose I could ask for it to start earlier?”

  “Your birthday’s in July? So’s mine! I’m on the fourth.”

  I turned my head to look at her-we were close enough to touch noses.

  Or lips.

  “Mine’s the fourth too!” I gasped.

  “Seriously? What are the odds of that?” she asked, shocked.

  “I don’t know! But it might be an important part of the puzzle.”

  “This is so Twin Peaks, isn’t it?” she said, sounding nervously excited. But I was now too preoccupied with dread at the thought of talking to Marie to get too deeply into our shared birthdays. Unable to postpone it any longer, I dialled her number, this time sending Spencer outside to retrieve my keys from the car door before it really did get stolen! Then I timidly asked Marie if she’d mind if I started my holiday from today.

  To my complete and utter surprise, she agreed!

  We spent the day in the garden sunning ourselves in the baking June heat, and throwing ideas around about what could possibly be happening, but we came up with nothing.

  “What are you going to tell Nick? Won’t he wonder why your holiday is starting early?”

  “I’ll just say Marie insisted I take it early-he knows what she’s like when she wants something.”

  “What about your blurs?”

  “My what?”

  She pushed herself up on her elbows to look at me.

  “I was trying to think of a term to describe what happens when things change for you, and it’s almost like your reality is blurring. So I’m going to call them blurs.”

  The term seemed apt enough so I nodded.

  “I can’t tell Nick. He doesn’t believe in anything paranormal. All of my friends thought I was just being ditzy when I tried to tell them about the name changing, so they’re out of the question too.” I snorted. “But, I’m pretty sure my psychiatrist would have plenty to say about it!”

  “You have a psychiatrist?”

  “I had one to try and help with the nightmares. Three months of therapy for nothing!”

  “Ooh, did you have it again last night?” she asked, her eyes twinkling.

  “The nightmare? No” I blushed, hoping she wouldn’t push for details again. Two nights dreaming of having mind blowing weird sex with her might freak her out. “What about you?”

  “Nope! Nightmare free two days in a row! It’s so nice waking up smiling for a change!”

  I was about to ask what her dreams were about when I heard Nick call out from in the house. I hadn’t realised how late it had got.

  “Do you want me to go?” she asked sitting up.

  “No, not at all. Do you want to stay for dinner?”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Absolutely!”

  “Hey, I can help in case you blur out over dinner and forget your boyfriend’s name!” she teased and I playfully slapped her arm, then we went inside laughing.

  Nick didn’t blink twice at my starting my holiday early, but did say he’d booked a few days off around my birthday, so to keep them free. We then opened the first of several bottles of wine to celebrate and ordered a Chinese takeaway. When I suggested Spencer stay over in our spare room, he looked a little surprised at how quickly our friendship had blossomed, but said he didn’t mind.

  We sat out in the garden drinking until long after the sun had gone down, and I was pleased to see them both getting along so well. When we were all ready to retire for the night, she gave me a hug and cheekily whispered in my ear, “Sweet dreams!”

  Almost as if she’d prophesized it, when I drifted off to sleep it was straight into a dream which involved Spencer, myself, and lots and lots of sex.

  When I awoke the next morning, I was completely disorientated. I wasn’t used to sleeping in, and my dreams had been more than vivid. Bit by bit, things came back to me and I jumped out of bed, wondering if my car really had changed.

  More importantly, had Marie really given me two weeks off at such short notice?

  After a quick shower, I threw on some shorts and a skimpy vest, fully intending to take advantage of the weather during my time off, and then made my way cautiously out to the lounge.

  Everything looked the same, but then it had yesterday morning too.

  “Morning. Sleep well?”

  I spun round. I’d almost forgotten about Spencer staying over. She was holding two mugs.

  “I did, thanks. You?”

  “No nightmares! I really think they’ve finished for good now! I made you a coffee-I was just about to bring it in to you” she said, handing one of the mugs to me. I took it gratefully.

  “So, what car do I have today?” I asked, half joking.

  “A purple fiesta?” She laughed, seeing my face drop. “Oh, I’m sorry, I couldn’t resist! It’s a red M6 or something.”


  “You’re not funny! I think my heart almost stopped then!” I said, smiling at her in relief.

  “Sorry! Listen, I was thinking. After breakfast, do you think it would be a good idea to write out some sort of checklist? We can both carry a copy to refer to, and if you need to you can call me and check things you aren’t sure about.”

  “But wouldn’t the things on the list change too?”

  “Yes, that’s the idea!” she said, smiling.

  “Oh, I get it! Ok, we can do that now.”

  I took two miniature notepads that I normally used for taking notes for Marie, and we sat in the garden with fresh coffees to brainstorm. It took a couple of hours to be as thorough as possible, and by the end of it we’d both gone through nearly half a notebook each. Spencer now knew almost everything there was to know about me.

  Afterwards, we took my ‘new’ car for a drive and I was really impressed with how it drove! When we returned home, Spencer suggested doing something spontaneous, so we got a taxi to town and found a seedy pub to sit outside and have lunch (and lots of cheap beer!) in. Then, very drunk, we went to the cinema and watched what turned out to be a truly awful film. It was such a fun day, it made me wonder why I’d never thought to pull a sicky on the spur of the moment before. And as we topped ourselves back up on beer (in the park, making us feel like naughty teenagers again) I got a call from Alice saying she was in town with Jen and Della, so they came and joined us, laden with more wine and eager to meet the mysterious Spencer.

  We all lounged in the park drinking straight from the bottle and I couldn’t remember when I’d last enjoyed myself so much. When I told them we shared the same birthday, there were whoops of delight.

  “Oh my god! You know what that means?” Alice said, passing me the wine. I took a swig.

  “Joint birthday party!” Della screamed, causing several passers-by to turn and look at us. “Have you got anything planned already, honey?” she asked Spencer, who shook her head smiling.

  “Then leave it with us! Do you know, Tris has been banging on about you for so long, it’s really nice to finally meet you!” Alice said throwing her arms around her in a floppy hug that sent both herself and Spencer flying on their backs in the grass.

  “Yeah, for a while we all thought she’d made you up! It’s nice to know she isn’t crazy after all” Jen said as I passed the bottle to her.

  “Thanks! I had no idea any of you thought I was crazy!” I laughed, but a little uneasily as the memory of my car blur was still very fresh. Spencer caught my eye and winked at me.

  “No, she’s not crazy. Strange, but not crazy!”

  I threw a bottle top at her half-heartedly.

  “Don’t you gang up on me as well!”

  “Sorry babe, but she’s right. You are a bit strange at times.”

  “Ali, you’re supposed to be my best friend! Is no one on my side?”

  “Aw, we’re all on your side chick! Now chug down the rest of this bottle, call your gorgeous boyfriend and ask him very sweetly to please come and take us all home!”

  Nick, being totally amazing as ever, came straight out and subjected himself to five very drunk women squeezing into his car without complaint. Della, being the tallest, rode shotgun, while I volunteered to lie across everyone’s laps in the back seat. The banter as we drove was loud and raucous, but I was aware of Spencer’s hand resting gently on my hip. As we went round a tight corner, it slipped down until it was on the top of my thigh and I found myself holding my breath. Being fairly drunk, I casually adjusted my position so I was lying more on my back, meaning her hand was on the inside of my thigh, and fairly high up-she didn’t move it away, so I stole a quick glance at her. She was laughing at something Alice had just said, but her eyes flickered down at me for just the briefest second.

  Oh my god.

  In that quick look, you could have powered the national grid with the electricity that sparked between us. The laughter in the car faded out, replaced by my ears ringing crazily as my mouth went dry. I wanted to raise my hips up to meet her hand. No, I wanted her hand between my legs, stroking me, touching me while she kissed me with those full red lips, pushing her tongue inside my mouth…

  “TRISTEN!”

  I was shaken from my daydream by Alice and Della shouting my name in unison.

  “What?” I said, embarrassed and irrationally certain everyone knew what I’d just been thinking.

  “Nick was just saying how you thought your car had been stolen when it was right outside, and I said it was a prime example of your strangeness!” Della said, leaning around the seat to look at me. Her expression was one that said ‘See? This proves my point!’

  “Oh, er yeah. I was still half asleep. Thanks Nick!”

  “No problemo! Ok Jen, here’s your stop” he said pulling up at the kerb next to Jen’s house. She fell out of the car unceremoniously, then waved to us all as we drove off. I found myself sitting Bette Middler, and couldn’t bring myself to look at Spencer in case we sparked again, but it didn’t stop our legs rubbing against each other’s. God, I wanted her to touch me again so badly, but her hand remained between us. Breathing heavily but keeping my gaze and attention on what Della was saying, I put my hand near hers so our fingers were touching. When she loosely entwined hers with mine, a small disco erupted in my stomach, and fire flooded between my thighs. I knew if I looked at her now, I wouldn’t be able to hide the hunger in my eyes. She softly moved her thumb and palm against mine in soft circular motions, and it felt so intensely good, I could barely breathe!

  “It’s this one just here on the left” I heard her say next to me and I realised, with a strange mixture of sadness and relief, we were outside her house. When the car had stopped, she removed her hand from mine and gave me a hug.

  “Anything blurred today?” she whispered in my ear, sending a shiver down the back of my neck.

  “Nope! Maybe it was just a one off?” I whispered back, drinking in her perfume. She pulled away and we chastely kissed each other’s cheeks.

  “It was nice meeting you all” she said as she got out of the car. They all shouted their goodbyes, then Nick was pulling away and I was left feeling very confused (and, yes, aroused) in the back seat with Alice.

  “I can see why you both get along so well” she said, leaning drunkenly across.

  “What? Why?”

  “Because she’s as strange as you are!”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Well, aside from the obvious, I think she fancies you!” Alice sang, poking my arm. Annoyed, I slapped her hand away.

  “No she doesn’t, and what was the ‘obvious’?”

  “You know, how she left you at the side of the road and disappeared for two years despite living practically on your doorstep! She must have seen the appeals for her to come forward. But now, now she’s all over you like a rash!” Alice licked her finger and put it in my ear, something she knew I hated.

  “Will you stop that? Look, she’s not gay, and she wasn’t over me like anything. And I explained why she didn’t come forward any earlier. I wouldn’t be here now if she hadn’t pulled me free.”

  “Doesn’t stop her being strange Tris!” Della added from the front.

  “She’s not strange!” I snapped, and Alice raised her eyebrows at me, surprised.

  “Ok, she’s not strange. I was only messing about babe.”

  “I know. Sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped” I said, putting my hand on her arm.

  “No, I’m sorry. She’s really nice. I guess I’m just a little bit jealous, that’s all.”

  “Hey, you’re still my best friend Al. I promise.”

  “Good, because the amount of money I’ve spent on your birthday present is just obscene, and I’m not even sure you deserve it, but as your best friend, I know I’ll get to borrow them whenever I want!” she said, and I smiled. I was pretty sure she’d got me the pair of Jimmy Choo shoes we’d both been cooing over a few weeks ago, and the price tag had been obscene, but
the way Alice’s mind worked was that if she bought them for me as a gift, we’d be able to share them equally. Thus, she was also buying them for herself but fully justifying the hideous spend!

  For some reason, I felt incredibly guilty as I thought about this. Less than a week ago, Alice and I were practically inseparable and I’d trusted her with every ounce of my being. But now? Now I doubted that trust as I was almost certain she’d try to rationalise my blurring into me being forgetful or strange. It made me feel a bit sad, so to compensate for it, I chatted to her at an almost high octane level until Nick pulled up outside her flat, then I gave her a massive hug to say goodbye.

  “Don’t forget tomorrow night!” she shouted as she tottered away.

  “Tomorrow night?” I echoed, searching my memory.

  “We’re going clubbing? God Tristen, what is wrong with you tonight honey?” Della said from the front seat.

  “Oh yeah, I forgot. Been a weird week” I remembered arranging it with them all last week, before I’d met Spencer. It seemed so long ago now with everything that had happened since.

  Nick dropped Della at her place and I took her seat in the front. As he drove towards our home, I placed his hand between my legs suggestively. He grinned at the road while I tried to ignore the fact his hand wasn’t having nearly the same effect that Spencer’s mere touch had.

  As he locked the car, I went up to the front door and put the key in the lock.

  Oh no.

  Sobering up quickly I took it out and checked it. It was definitely the right one, all new and shiny and fresh.

  Am I at the right house?

  Nick came up behind me.

  “What are you doing?” he asked, sounding puzzled. I jumped guiltily. “Give it here.”

  I put my keys into his open palm while he rolled his eyes at me, then watched as he inserted the key and turned it. The door opened! I breathed a huge sigh of relief. I was just pissed!

  I’d almost forgotten I’d hinted for sex when he picked me up and carried me to the bedroom. There wasn’t a single part of me that was aroused anymore, but I lay back and tried to enjoy it anyway, dosing myself with another strong helping of guilt at the same time. Nick was the best lover I’d ever had, and certainly the most attentive to my needs, so why was I having to try?