Koibumi

by Hildred Billings

  “Aiko-san!”

  Jerking back into reality, Aiko came face-to-face with Takeshi outside one of her neighbor’s gates. He stood in his usual professing suit, sweat coursing down his forehead and smothering the handkerchief in his grasp. “Takeshi-san? What are you doing over here?”

  “I was popping in to say hello to an acquaintance of mine. Do you know Mrs. Nishiyama?” He pointed his thumb toward the house behind him.

  “I know who she is, although I admit we do not get the chance to speak much.” Mrs. Nishiyama was an older widow who had been in that neighborhood since before Aiko and Reina. At one time there was a Mr. Nishiyama, but he died a few years before. Since then the widow kept to herself, not that she was ever a grand socializer to begin with.

  “You live near here, Aiko-san?”

  He said it casually, or at least enough that it didn’t send a red flag up in Aiko’s brain. She squeaked an affirmative and pointed to her house a few doors down. “I was coming back from an appointment.”

  “I’m glad I caught you on your way home, then.” Takeshi pulled his knapsack in front of him and rummaged through one of the flaps. “I was going to call you later and ask if you wanted to borrow this.” He pulled out a hardbound book and handed it to her. “I finished reading it and thought you might like it.”

  Aiko perused her hand over the cover. Another book! She hadn’t finished the others yet! “That’s kind of you. I admit I am not familiar with…” she glanced at the byline on the cover again, “Sylvia Plath.”

  “She is amazing. Once I process this book, I’m thinking about finding a way to cram it into one of my syllabi.” Takeshi stood, hands swinging and face trying to defy his awkwardness.

  Having to admit the sentiment touched her, Aiko nodded toward the street and took a step forward. “Would you like to come have some tea, Takeshi-san?” Her heart raced at the thought of him entering her house. Why, she had no idea. Because I’ve dreamed of having sex with him there! Thankfully Aiko could pass her blushing off as a touch of the heat.

  “Well, I suppose I don’t have to be anywhere right now…”

  In polite talk, that meant “Yes, I would love to.” Aiko forced a smile and led the way to her house.

  The full panic didn’t set in until she was halfway through the genkan and trying to remember if her favorite teapot was clean. This house is a ticking time bomb! She rounded on Takeshi, who was in the midst of slipping into the guest slippers after leaving his loafers behind. “I’m so sorry this house is a mess.”

  “Huh?” Takeshi stood straight up, bemusement twinkling in his large eyes. Aiko slapped a hand over her mouth and gestured toward the living area.

  While Takeshi settled down at the table, Aiko rushed to get some iced tea and a package of cookies. Within two minutes she had her tray ready for entertaining, although her hands shook as she took out the tea and rested it on the table. “Please, help yourself,” she said, before retreating to turn on the air conditioner.

  Takeshi poured them both glasses of iced tea – Shit! I’m supposed to do that for the guest! – and maintained a pleasant smile. “You have a lovely house, Aiko-san. Very classic.”

  “I suppose that’s one word for it…” The house was “classic,” indeed. Practically a relic from the war era. The wood was probably rotten – and it was certainly a giant fire hazard – and the tatami in the Japanese-style room had mold Aiko didn’t want to know about. And the plumbing! When Aiko got on these tangents in her mind, she had to remind herself that they were blessed to have a house at all.

  “Is that your roommate?” Aiko followed his eyes to a picture sitting on the bookshelf. It was a candid photo of her and Reina at a picnic a year ago, sitting on a blanket and looking over their shoulders. Reina’s thin lips were in the process of talking to the cameraperson, but the timing of the photo made it look like she was trying to smile. “Or your sister?”

  Aiko froze at the table, her brain racking for an explanation that didn’t end with gaaay. “That is not my sister,” was all she said. The fact Takeshi pegged Reina as female to begin with was currently lost on her. Later she would realize that was the first sign he and Reina would get along if he weren’t male.

  He nodded in pleasant affirmation. “How long have you lived here?”

  “Fifteen years.”

  “Really?” Takeshi let out a high whistle. “And you’ve been a homemaker for that long?”

  “Yes.” Aiko’s voice was starting to leave her. My life sounds so ridiculous! A single woman who was a homemaker while her butch-looking roommate had a day job to support them both? Yeah, right! A liberal-minded man like Takeshi probably saw right through Aiko’s gossamer veil of deceit.

  Before she could think up another excuse, however, the doorbell rang.

  It was Yuri, appearing with a small bag of strawberries to give Aiko as a “just because” present. Since Aiko did not entertain many guests in her home, Yuri must have thought she was alone, for she prattled off mindless chatter as if no one waited for Aiko’s attentions in the living area. Not until she leaned through the door and saw Takeshi did she gasp and excuse herself. Aiko noted she made a strange face at the fact Takeshi was a young-looking man making himself at home in Reina’s usual seat. Don’t start with me. At least I’m not married to him.

  “Is this a bad time for me to be here, Aiko-san?” Takeshi asked once Aiko returned. “I do not wish to be a bother on your household.”

  “You’re fine. Wait here a second and I’ll get you the Dickens book you loaned me.”

  Although she had never finished it, Aiko returned it on the pretense that she had. Takeshi attempted to open a dialogue about the book but found Aiko reticent to reply – gee, I wonder why. During his emphatic speech about Dickens’s writing style and the classic serialization of novels, he shook off his professor’s jacket, revealing well-toned biceps. He caught Aiko staring at them.

  “Forgive me!” She averted her eyes, although the image of him in his muscular form was already seared into her vision.

  “What? Never met an academic who looks like he also plays baseball?” Takeshi laughed. “Feel free to look. I’m not shy.”

  Aiko was. She hadn’t stared at a man with muscles since her fourth boyfriend, the juvenile body builder. Her memory went straight to making out with him in her bedroom, her hands traversing his shoulder and biceps as if they were small hills. Go away! In comparison, her spouse was the most unmuscular person in Japan, with a flat, bony torso and hips that only existed the day before her period. What would it be like to make love to someone who didn’t poke out your eye when they turned over? She also shook that thought out of her head.

  She entertained Takeshi for another ten minutes, though her heart was not in it. Perhaps that was why he excused himself suddenly, citing an appointment he had forgotten until then. Aiko saw him out into the yard, the last of the sunshine beating down on his expressive face.

  The rain came shortly thereafter. Aiko latched the house shut and made dinner while thunder boomed above her. She tried to turn on the TV to watch while she cooked, but the rain and thunder were too loud for her to hear the late afternoon dramas. Thus she was left with nothing but the images of Takeshi’s biceps in her brain. She chopped onions to make curry with renewed fervor.

  Reina came home drenched from head to toe – though she left her shoes and briefcase in the genkan, the hems of her trousers tracked water along the hardwood floor in the hallway. Aiko gasped as she went out to greet her spouse. The apologies wafting in her direction made her wonder if Takeshi did this in his own pristine home. Of course not. He’s too aware for that. Reina went upstairs to change before settling down for dinner, leaving her wet clothes behind on the hallway floor. Aiko picked them up with a huff.

  It wasn’t until bedtime that she began to loosen up again. After a relaxing dip in the tub – alone – Aiko went upstairs to find her spouse already brushing her teeth in the hallway sink. They exchanged nods as Aiko went into the bedr
oom to get ready for bed. She stood in front of her closet, putting away the last of that day’s laundry, and caught a glimpse of her spouse still brushing her teeth a few meters away.

  She stared at her, those thin arms shoving that toothbrush back and forth as they poked through the sleeveless arms of a black tank top. Reina, still in need of a haircut, continued to toss her bangs out of her eyes every time she stood back up from spitting. She looks like a man… Aiko had often thought that, but she knew better than to ever express it. But it was true: all her ex-boyfriends, save for the body builder, had the same physique as Reina. Was it one of the things that attracted Aiko to her? Back then? When Reina had long hair, heavy makeup, and clothes matching popular styles of the day? No. Aiko had never seen this much of Reina’s skin before they first made love that long ago winter. But she would be lying if she said that Reina’s androgyny had not been a part of the initial appeal.

  Recent dreams flooded Aiko’s mind.

  She closed the closet with a decisive click before spinning on her heel and approaching her spouse from behind. Aiko opened her arms and wrapped them around Reina’s abdomen.

  “Oi.” She bent down to spit one last time before running her toothbrush beneath the faucet. “What’s wrong? You need something?”

  Aiko rubbed her forehead along her spouse’s spine. “I love you,” she said with a whine.

  “Nani sore?” Reina put her toothbrush back in its holder. “Mou, I love you too.”

  They stood like that for a few seconds, although Aiko could tell her spouse was becoming antsy to get going with her evening. And do what? Go to bed? A yawn rippled through Reina’s body, her muscles surging into Aiko’s face. God, just what she needed. More muscles.

  “Nee, Reina.” Aiko lifted her head, and her hands, pushing against Reina’s torso and feeling for her breasts. “Kiss me.”

  “Ehh?” Reina shook her spouse’s arm off and took her hand. Soon enough they were looking into each other’s eyes, a swathe of warmth overcoming Aiko’s heart. Good to know I’m still alive in there. Oh, yes, very alive, as she soon discovered.

  Reina liked to start with gentle kisses, containing a hint of seduction and a package of potential. Then she liked to sink in further, easing their lips apart and dipping her tongue into her lover’s mouth. Her taste was as delectable as ever. Aiko wound her hands around her spouse’s neck and fell into their kiss.

  Fuck me. That rise of desire mounted Aiko’s groin, and suddenly she imagined them in bed, limbs shaking and throats crying in pleasure. Reina felt her wife’s awakening as well, as told by her melting arms and deep sigh.

  “Hot damn, Ai-chan.” Reina pulled away long enough to tease her. “You’ve got a bit of fire in you tonight.”

  “Yes. You’d better come put it out.” She lowered her hand between her spouse’s legs, pressing against her cotton shorts.

  If Reina noticed something “off” about her wife, then she did not let on. No, she was too smitten with the notion of lovemaking to realize she had a dark edge to her voice. Just as well. The last thing Aiko wanted was to disturb her spouse’s sensibilities – and they did not seem disturbed, from the way Reina pushed her hand atop Aiko’s and pressed it against her groin. Although Aiko had felt the curves of her spouse’s vulva a thousand times before, the implications of Reina’s sex was not lost on her.

  The thing about making love to another woman is that it’s always for the sake of it. There were no “accidents” with other biological women. But it didn’t stop Aiko from wondering, as Reina pulled her into another fervent, soul-crushing kiss, how virile her spouse would be if she were male. Would Aiko have ever become pregnant in all their years together? Multiple times? Reina always said that the greatest benefit to lesbianism was that no one had to worry about that. They could make love without the onus of birth control.

  “Shiyou ka?” Reina mumbled into Aiko’s ear, their hands locking together as the former led the latter into the bedroom. Aiko recognized that scintillating tone in her spouse’s voice: the one precluding the kind of sex that Aiko figured made babies.

  Reina sat on the bed first, eyes reflecting the rising desire inside her. It didn’t take much to get her going. Aiko could suggest, “Sex?” from across the hall and Reina would be there to hump her within two seconds. I love it, but it’s exhausting. A part of Aiko hoped it would exhaust her into a dreamless slumber that night.

  As Reina rolled over onto her side of the bed, Aiko sat down upon hers and began pulling back the covers. The nightstand opened and closed behind her. Good. That was what Aiko wanted anyway. Her gut infused with the fire Reina commented on only a minute ago.

  “Ai-chan…” Reina’s breath was in her ear and kisses rained upon her shoulder. “Which one do you want?” She slipped her hand between Aiko’s legs this time, pulling away her lingerie to gain access to her vulva. “I’m going to fuck you senseless.”

  Somewhere within her, Aiko managed a harried, high-pitched breath as her spouse’s finger rubbed against her clitoris. “I want yours.” She fell against Reina’s torso and opened her legs. More fingers pressed against her.

  “My what?” Reina’s other hand maneuvered up her wife’s chest and grabbed her left breast. Holy shit. Since Aiko only wore a lacy negligee, she could feel every bit of Reina’s skin pressed against her areola. Here came another squeak.

  “I want your…” Aiko fumbled on the last word. It seemed odd to grant her spouse a body part she didn’t actually have. “I want your cock.” She wondered how many lesbians around the country said that on a regular basis.

  “Do you?” Reina pushed upon her, smothering her with hot breaths and stronger kisses. Her body may be light and lean, but her strength was unmatched when she was sexually excited. “Do you want me to fuck you with it?”

  Aiko imagined herself lying down, head shoved into her pillow as Reina thrust inside her like in her dreams. “Yes.” The thought brought her arousal all the way down to her loins. She felt the first surge of aieki come to lubricate her hole. “And I want…”

  “Hm?” Reina continued to peck her wife’s throat and shoulder with kisses.

  Eyes closed, Aiko draped her hair over her spouse’s shoulder and opened her mouth toward the ceiling. “Do me like a man.”

  The kisses and the groping stopped. Reina backed away from her wife and returned to the nightstand. “If that’s what you really want.” She stared into the dark abyss of the top drawer, where she kept their sex toys.

  Aiko snapped herself alert again and finished undoing the bedding. While she waited for her spouse to get ready – psychologically, more than anything – she took off her lingerie and let her silk underwear rest on the floor. By the time she crawled beneath the covers, Reina was naked and pulling on her straps.

  “Ii ko,” she said with a low grunt, her hand snatching out to take Aiko’s above her head. “Spread those legs wide open for me so I can fuck your little omanko.”

  Aiko hadn’t heard that term for her – “good girl” – in a long time. Does she think I’m still a good girl? For fuck’s sake, she had been thinking about men lately! And never mind what she usually thought when Reina’s phallus was coming at her like a bullet! But she knew this game. She had played it since the first days of their relationship. Reina was establishing their roles in bed. When Aiko thought of those implications, her entire body shuddered in anticipation.

  Eventually she did as told, letting her legs curl around Reina’s hips as they came down for hers. Those kisses returned, although now they chomped at her throat and lips with renewed purpose. Her hand went to where her phallus would be in only a few more seconds.

  “Are you wet yet?” Reina’s index finger probed her wife’s omanko to assess its readiness. “Mou, not wet enough. I’ll take care of that.” She disappeared beneath the covers before Aiko could say anything.

  Her tongue was like a bolt of lightning striking Aiko where she needed it most. After falling into her pillow, she found her legs dashing to eit
her side of the bed as Reina licked her way to the center of her wife’s omanko. “Yokatta…” Aiko said, her eyes squeezing shut and her mouth hanging open. “Kimochi…” Her spouse knew how to use her tongue to make clitorises swell and omanko wet enough for more lewd sex acts.

  Aiko snuggled into the bed and allowed her mind to wander away, where she could focus on nothing else besides the tongue flowing between her folds and immersing itself as deep as it could inside her hole. One hand pulled her negligee down so her areolas could brush against the bedding. Soon her breath quickened and she faced either a point of no return or the ability to shout for something other than cunnilingus.

  Reina briefly replaced her tongue with two of her fingers.

  “Fuck!” Aiko went with her latter option.

  It was not what she originally asked for, but it sufficed. Her body burned in the craving for what her spouse gave her, turning her omanko into an oasis that made it easier for Reina to fuck her, two fingers inside and her tongue attached to her wife’s clitoris. Aiko’s back arched off the bed as her forehead dug into the pillow. An orgasm already gathered inside her groin.

  Before she could pop, however, Reina sucked her swollen clitoris and pulled away.

  “Come here.” Her voice was deep, rough and guttural, telling Aiko that her spouse had found the part of her that was at the whims of the darkest part of her gender dysphoria. But by now Aiko was so wound up that it didn’t bother her – as long as Reina delivered the goods between her legs.

  She did.

  “Iya!” After so many years together, Reina had grown used to her wife shouting a negative word at the moment of sudden penetration. For Aiko it was a reflex, and she did not intend for her spouse to stop at all – they had another word for that. A word Aiko did not intend to utter.

  Reina grunted into her ear the entire time she fucked her. The seasoned woman had taken her wife at the right angle on the first try, and now Aiko gasped into the air as her limbs climbed around Reina’s thin frame. Their hips danced together in conjugal thrusts; the phallus protruding from Reina was full and familiar inside her wife.