My Bet Is You

by Manuela Ricci

  "No, quiet" I'm not afraid of her, or what might come out of his mouth forked, but I do not know what in truth I'm wrong.

  I'm standing in front of the four queens of bitches who deliberately ignore me while I wait snocciolino their dietary shakes.

  "You can not understand, his hands were everywhere, I could not move ..." I bite the inside of the cheek. I know exactly who is speaking.

  "Oh, excuse us ... you know, it's almost impossible not to mention Logan», he stops to throw me a look of defiance. Try to get my reaction, but do not let him get in ridiculous in front of everyone again, threatening to make me lose the job which I desperately need.

  "I guess, but since I can survive without the details of your miserable sex life, will you order, I should serve other tables."

  A smirk flows over his mouth, leans toward me with her hand to support them her chin, her eyes a green jade look at me from head to foot.

  "You think you can afford the luxury of answering this way?", With a gesture of the other hand he demolishes one of the cruets on the table, crumbles to the ground soiling the floor and my shoes.

  "Whoops, that careless" breaks out in laughter, followed by her friends.

  "Come clean, I would never want that filth grazed my Gucci shoes." I'm going to answer, but I know I have to stop myself right now, Danny, my head is facing in the hallway of his office to admire the scene.

  I head to the back followed by his shouting, we press my back against the cold wall of taking me a few minutes.

  Breathe, remember to breathe. I repeat to myself and I try to compose myself, not to give in to bad things. I have suffered worse than a bitch full of himself as Bettany.

  I grab the bucket with a cloth and when I come back in the room, I am assailed by a subdued voices.

  "They were not our agreement!" It's Logan to thunder his voice to the entire room, the rest petrified. "You leave her alone Bet, no kidding!" Threat. She does not seem at all intimidated, in fact, he stands up laying his hand on his chest and toned statue of him.

  I swallow hard, feeling his forehead with sweat bead. "Stay away, do not joke," Logan back one step, and then bend down to pick up the pieces of glass. I reached him.

  "I am," I say, clearing my voice and leaning in my turn to disaster created by Bettany. His face is lifted towards mine, I do not know when it is entered, and if you've watched the whole scene, but I see the disappointment in the sea that is swallowing me. The heart speeds up rapidly.

  "Yes, exactly, do you do to her, our money to pay for it."

  Logan's jaw snaps while more contracts outlining his sculpted profile, do not think I've ever seen him so angry, if not with me.

  "Close. That. Fuck. Of. Mouth. Bettany! "Bleaching, like the rest of those present that boggles the strangled growl coming out of his throat.

  "Go away, please go away!" That's all I can say, I do not need him to defend myself.

  When it is the same reason why I am scorned. Thins eyes, jumps up hunting hands in his pockets before turning to cleave the air with his massive shoulders that contract with each stride.

  The Danny's door slams plunging a deafening silence. I hasten to clean, Mercy, in no gentle tone he ceases to serve the queen bee and her followers.

  "Oh Carrie," recalls Bettany me. I turn in the middle of the room full of college students, some are my classmates with whom I realize I have not had time to exchange a single word.

  "You're just a toy for JJ, do not kid yourself, I know him better than anyone else." I do not have the answer ready this time, maybe because a part of me, has always thought exactly that of him.

  "When you close the sewer will always be too late, right Bet?" Blaze meets my eyes, showing me an apology that I would never have expected.

  The hours are endless, but the thing that makes me feel anxious Logan is seeing through the glass. It is placed to his car I do not know how many hours. I had not realized, until I pointed that out Mercedes.

  "What have you done?" He murmurs, and we begin to clean.

  "Nothing." But I'm just a liar. I accused him, laughed at, exactly the same way in which Bettany did with me. I try to hate him for how he manages to make me feel, for the way in which his voice pronounce my name, for as

  his warm hand touched my branding her skin on fire, awakening something I can not allow myself to live. No, the trouble with baggage that drag behind.

  "I've never seen reduced in that state, and work here for a year," says Mercy, with his chin toward the guy who does not deter even for a moment his eyes from me, I feel as if they managed to stroke even through clothing.

  They follow me, I feel them slipping him, lenses, lapping my body in a way that gives me goose bumps. Logan Damn you, damn you.

  Temporized with salt shakers that almost overflowing, with towels that I placed these ten times, and with the rag does not know how many times I passed on the bar that has never shone in this way.

  "Sooner or later you have to get out. Carrie Talk to him. "He's right, I can not hide in here forever. I go in the back to change me, I put my uniform in a bag to wash it, and after greeting everyone, I head for the exit.

  Mercy winks at me to encourage me when hesitated in front of goal.

  Let me give an assent and go out of the room with the breath caught in his throat.

  Logan has his arms crossed on his chest, his biceps flexing stiffly, his pectorals and abdominals, despite the white t-shirt wearing, are accented effortlessly. A khaki pants wraps his big legs like tree trunks. "What are you still doing here?", I can not look into his eyes.

  "We need to talk, get in the car." It's not a question but an order which at this moment I can not escape, with a nod of the head shows me the passenger side.

  On the tip of the tongue they are going to blow up all the excuses for which I want to avoid it, but I stand by his side, pressed against the skin smooth and soft seat of her luxury car. The gaze is fixed to the road, he does not issue a extricating breath in congested city traffic. "Where do we go?"

  Silence.

  "Did you by any chance going to talk to me sooner or later, or did you accidentally kidnapped?"

  Watch Now me, now the road. Bouffant and curse at myself for being put in this situation. I do not understand what's happening to me. Yes, it is a nice guy, okay, Logan is more than just beautiful with an ass speaking, begging to cling to him, but it's not just physical attraction.

  I recognize the excitement dictated by two bodies that invoke each other, but not only that, what I'm feeling between us.

  In his eyes I see something that makes me feel protected, safe, as I did not feel so long, too long, and from the beginning I tried to shake off this feeling only dictated by two ocean-colored eyes.

  His irises were the warm shades of the West Coast sea: crystal clear

  "We're going to my house." An incessant alarm breaks out in my head. Shit, the party. "Look I do not want to go to no ...»

  Do not let that finishes his sentence, his hand rests on my knee, I hold my breath for a moment too long and I have to remind myself to breathe.

  "We will pass from the back, I do not see anyone, but I really need to talk to, or I'll go crazy," he says, then bringing his free hand to get lost among the foliage of his hats, you just uncombed. Rest puzzled by his words, but he is right, we need to talk.

  This situation is becoming embarrassing, even if my body is getting used to the touch that still holds on my knee. I move for a moment on the seat, pretending to look for a more comfortable position, but really I'm just trying to shake him off.

  Logan acknowledges the message and we remain absolutely silent for the next ten minutes that separate us from his villa. Do not pass by the usual road that winds up the hill, we get around the neighborhood we stand squarely on the back of the house. The bass of the music blends with the sea breeze whipping my face as soon as I am about to go down.

  This place is wonderful, I think I could stand still to watch him forever: the body of water reflects the full
moon, the stars, in this part of dimly lit city light up the sky from a dark blue notes, the sound of the waves is a sweet symphony that isolates me from all

  my surroundings, everything except the smell of his cologne, a mixture of spices and cedar wood, strong and cool at the same time.

  "Let's go", his hand reaches for mine.

  I shrug and avoiding his touch I go back to the path created by pink granite slabs scattered almost at random, stuck in the turf.

  Logan opens a door, which goes directly under the stairs. I'm struck by the voices of the people, but they all look busy outside, by the pool, just as he had said Tia. Sgattaioliamo fast up the stairs, we pass in front of one of the white lacquered doors, muffled moans, I just stop in my tracks.

  Logan clears his throat. "It's the Gus room," he explains, and then tell me its the end of the corridor.

  It gives way and go into what is his world, perhaps his hut. A King Size bed towers in the center of the room Total black style. Only the walls a bright white, almost pearly, create a stark contrast to the modern furnishings, giving also a special brightness to the environment. of famous football players shirts stand on the wall to my left, followed by a huge shelf compartments with every possible trophy, the quick darting eyes on every point, angle and object that I can talk the guy behind me.

  I take a couple of minutes before heading back on planet earth and give voice to the only reason why I am here.

  "So, what do you want me to speak?"

  Logan sits down on the bed without stopping to keep your eyes on me, his eyes embarrass me and make me angry at the same time.

  I can not stand the way it tries to look inside, to see what I can not show anyone, because there is no plausible explanation for everything I've done in my life ... and beyond.

  "I'll be honest with you, Carrie, I like you ... so much." Okay, this is more to say something, it is more than talk.

  "I can not explain it, I can not understand, but ... but I feel bound to you, as if I've known you forever. I never, and I mean never thought a girl like I think of you ... "jumps up, ruffling the golden hair, which falls with a few tufts on his forehead," ... and fuck's sake, I do not even know who you are, you do not I know, and they are reduced to a suck. Yes, Carrie. "He points out, almost in panic, walking up and down the room in which the air has been sucked out so quickly that starts to gasp. Every word that came out of his mouth, he jerked me, engulfed and destroyed at the same time.

  "I've been reduced to one sucks because I can not understand what should I do with you, what have I done? Tell me what have I done? You seem to hate me for no reason. "

  He's right, but I do not hate him, I hate just the person I became. Of course, his life will always lies my utter contempt, but the problem is not Logan, it's me.

  "You have not done anything, I'm not made for Logan bonds, so it's just why I behave like this." I spend

  hand on his trophies, I watch the cups, medals overflowing from them, and I sit on a photo, take it in your hands.

  Is Logan, will have maybe ten, eleven, wearing a football uniform of course, your hair is long just below the ears. It's really funny: at his side a woman with a radiant smile lights up the whole shot, the familiar features, eyes, hair color, make me think right away who it is.

  "It's your mother?" I turn to him, with the frame still in his hands, his gaze goes out to my words.

  "It was my mother," she says barely a whisper.

  His eyes widened, not knowing what to say, I read only the pain that turns his face.

  "Do not say, do not say you're sorry. I heard that phrase so many times that I can not accept it. "He sits on a padded bench at the foot of the bed.

  "What happened?" The hands come together in two fists supporting his chin, fixed the wall in front of him.

  "I was sick, I saw her go out under my eyes, day after day, week after week, until one evening, while I held her hand in mine trying to give my comfort, for he felt too much pain, if n ' she's gone."

  I sit beside him, instinctively grabbed his hand, dissolving it from that close. I do not know this kind of loss, but I know what it's like not being able to embrace the person you love. Maybe that's trying to make us fit. We're both broken in one way or another. Although he does not know what broke me, I think it perceives something, because his Stratta increases in mine.

  "I have to ... I'm sorry, I must go," shot in the foot, wiping sweaty hands on the fabric of his jeans.

  "From what are you running away, Carrie?" His hands encircle my shoulders.

  "From you!" Rocking back a step, with the confused look that tapers, and without hesitation, I run away, I run down the stairs, until you come out the back door and I get lost in the dark of night.

  What did I say? What I told him!

  10

  RUN IN PAIN

  Logan

  Rest for a moment stunned by his words, so much so that her hair fluttering over the door of my room, accompanied by the sound of his footsteps down the hall bring me back to reality. Shit, I have to stop her. His eyes were glued to my as he said: Since you ... you ... but it was as if he was looking at me, as if for a moment he was lost in another world.

  I run down the stairs, Lex tries to stop me to tell me I do not know what, but I pay attention, I raise my hand in the air.

  "Not now," I say in return, entrance to the hall to the back. It does not walk little 'have gone far. The ocean breeze invests me as soon as I set foot in the garden.

  I look around with the breath becomes heavier with every step, her eyes seek in the dark of night. There's something

  in her, in her eyes, the sound of his voice, something

  that inevitably attracts me without having the necessary strength to be able to subtract. Scocco look towards the beach and I see it, I knew it could not have gone far. Poggio hand on the wall of fence, I flex the arm, giving me an impetus to override it.

  I do not run to her, is sitting near the shore, plunge your feet in the sand and approach when they are behind him, his face turns over his shoulder to look for mine. Point your eyes at night lapping against a horizon that has disappeared from our eyes, but it's always there.

  Some things we can not see them, but no we are not, or may not be true. Caccio hands in his pockets and look for her to speak, everything around me seems to have taken a different form when I met her. It's hard to explain, when you yourself can not understand it. I want her? Shit, desperately, I wish I could feel his body pressing against mine, his mozzarsi breath in my throat as I lose myself in the sound of his voice torn from my touch. It's my game of the playoffs, I can not fail, I must do my snap, grab the ball and throw to my widereceivers, run, run against the wind that overwhelms me.

  Every yards where I push myself more than I do not reach the goal, I reach her, is Carrie I'm thinking, only the sound of waves breaking occupies the surrounding silence.

  "I did not mean what I said."

  His voice cut through the air, always so strong and sure that does not waver even in this time when its curved shoulders would think of something else.

  "What did you mean then?" I keep a calm tone, but inside I'm bursting in an attempt to understand what torments. He raises up, hats windblown intoxicate my breath that requires me to squint his eyes momentarily. When you turn divides us just a step, his look comes into my easily, as if it were the most natural thing in the world to look inside, lost in those parts of us that we keep hidden, but for some strange reason you and I see them all the spots that have smeared our souls.

  "I can not tell Logan, now I want to go home."

  The eyelids are lowered, accompanied by thick lashes, under which his gaze fixed my mouth. The breathing stops, and without thinking about the shot against me, I hold her in my arms. Her body is rigid against mine, but I let it go, do not let it fall into something that's pulling at the bottom.

  "I'm here Carrie." I feel just chill, his hands falter before settling on my back, an electric shock invades every cell of my body, the
warmth of his breath against my neck is a light and violent caress at the same time that makes me miss a beat. We remain embraced for a time that I can not quantify, I just know that I would never want this moment to end, it's like I found my place in the world, if you knew

  exactly what I wanted, and I want her, this girl who escapes me away every time I'm so close to being able to grasp it.

  "You have to run." His face is lifted towards my, does not seem confused by my words, is waiting to keep talking, nailing her burning eyes on me.

  "You have to race against the pain, whatever it is." I know what it's like when the rest of the universe revolves, the lives of others moves and you're still, paralyzed to observe events that flow undisturbed leaving you behind. I saw my mother go out under my eyes, his loss is a constant presence with which I continue to live with.

  But one day, I got up determined to face the hole at center chest. I started walking in small steps toward that pain until you start running towards him, and since then I have not stopped since, because I know that if I did overwhelm me.

  It's like when you make the leap, though now in the matches we avoid the danger to carry out an action in the NFL run to meet the fucking danger, the points, you look at him straight in the face, and with a shoulder throw him to the ground no more stop you, you shoot down other fixed points and your goal, your goal. Football is not just a sport, it is life, only those who are in the middle can see how we can come closer to reality.

  "And if I can not run?" He caresses the curve of her jaw to keep his chin between finger and thumb. "Let me teach you."

  I do not want to know now what he's trying to swallow it, I just want to help her, and I'm sure when it's ready, I'll tell you. He just needs to trust me.

  "Come," I say, we walk along the beach, in the distance we can hear the bass of my house music mix with the sound of the ocean. Our hands touch at every step, it is a pleasant and heartbreaking feeling, because I'd like to hear it in mine, but I know that spaventerei, she is not like the others and that's what makes me come back down to earth.