by Kaci Rose
She lets me hold her hand on the way there. I do it as much for me as I do for her safety. It's dark out, and we’re in a town we don't know. She's quiet, and I think she’s dreading going in to face her brother, as much as I am. I send up a silent prayer that he is already in bed, but I know Landon, he will wait up, until Austin is back to make sure she’s okay.
We turn the corner, and the bus is in front of us, as I sigh.
"Thank you for coming after me tonight. I had a really good time." I tell her.
"I did too, and I meant what I said. You’re good enough. Don't let him tell you otherwise. He's just being an asshole, when he says that."
I squeeze her hand. "Well, your opinion is the one that’s important anyway, so it doesn't matter."
I open the bus door and step aside to let her in before me. We get inside, and Austin stops dead in her tracks in the living room. I step around her to find her brother standing up.
He looks at her, and back to me, but doesn't say anything.
"Dallas, why don't you go to bed? I think Landon and I need to talk." She says without taking her eyes off her brother. Her tone is one we have both heard before, when she’s really, really, really mad at us, and she has only used it a few times before.
I nod, but whisper in her ear, "It's nothing worth fighting with him about."
She doesn't say anything, but she looks at me like I'm crazy. I know there’s no changing her mind, so I head back to my bunk, grab some clothes to change into, and go into the bathroom.
"You can't just go off and not answer my texts. I have to know you’re okay." Landon says.
"I was fine. I was with Dallas."
"But I didn't know that. Do you have any idea what was going through my head?"
"I have an idea Dad, and I really don't care. How dare you stick your nose in my love life? You have no right."
Love life? Does that mean she wants a relationship with me? Do I stand a chance? I'd give anything for a chance with her. I know I'd do anything to prove I'm the guy for her and make her mine.
But her brother is right to an extent, she deserves someone better and who doesn't have my past. If I'm going to have even a slight chance, I need to get the rest of my life in order and stay the course.
I can be that guy. I will be that guy.
Chapter 9
Austin
It's been a week, since I was dancing with Dallas in the bar. A week, since I've been in his arms. A week, since our almost kiss. I miss him something fierce. He's up and gone, before I get up in the morning, and he spends most of his time at the venues with Landon or with their team. No more movie nights and no more going out. At least, he and Landon seem to be okay and talking, even if it feels like he chose my brother over me. Though, what did I expect? Landon is his best friend, and Landon is the band.
It's hard to be ignored. I didn't even want to come on this tour, it wasn't in my plans, but they talked me into it. I've been trying to figure out my next steps, because if they think I'm going to be staying at the house after this, they are dead wrong. I've thought about a cabin in The Rocky Mountains. That’s far enough away, and the possibility of no cell phone service sounds good to me right now.
Every show, it hurts singing with him and putting on an act like nothing is wrong, when everything is wrong. He’s very good at making it seem like he’s singing to me. The look in his eyes was too much tonight, and I couldn't look at him. For the first time on the tour, I sang to the crowd. I prefer the thousands of nameless people, instead of looking into Dallas's eyes for another night.
Being on stage with them, takes everything out of me. I normally bolt, before they finish the show. But tonight, Ivy caught me and wanted some girl time, and I couldn't tell her no. That is why I’m currently sitting backstage with drink number, well, I lost count. But it feels good to laugh about them getting lost yesterday and having to call Tony to come get them. Tony gave them a lecture the whole way back to the bus. It feels great to talk to someone, since Landon and Dallas have been ignoring me. Assholes.
"Can you believe there are only two more weeks of this tour left? I’m so glad the last week of shows fell through. I'm ready to be home and have some downtime." Ivy says.
"Yeah, I'm over it, too. It's like the guys don't even want me here anymore. I could probably blow off the last few stops, and they wouldn't even care."
"Oh, sweetheart, you know they would. Especially Dallas, I see how he looks at you."
"Better get your eyes checked. He goes out of his way to avoid me lately." I shake my head and take another sip.
"When you aren't looking, his eyes are always on you. He's watching you and knows your every move almost before you do. He's always sending people over with water or food. You didn't think those people did that just to be nice, did you?"
Damn, I did think that. I thought it's what they did for all the performers at each venue. I had no idea Dallas was behind it.
"Why would he care? He's been ignoring me for over a week now. I thought there was something there, but I guess I was wrong. My asshole brother stuck his nose in where it doesn't belong, and ever since, Dallas has been going out of his way to avoid me."
Ivy watches me but doesn't say anything.
"What?" I ask her.
"Your brother has been going out of his way to avoid you, yes, but not Dallas. You know he asked me the other day to stay with you backstage, while they were performing, so you weren't alone?"
"What when?" I'm confused, why would he do that?
"A week or so ago."
That was after our night at the bar, and when he started ignoring me.
"It doesn't make sense," I say more to myself.
"Oh, honey, guys don't make sense. My guess is if your brother was all up in arms, Dallas is trying to prove to him he's worthy of you, before he makes a move. He’s going to want your brother on his side for your sake, for his sake, and the sake of the band. He and Landon go their separate ways, and then everyone here is out of a job."
I sigh. I know she’s right to an extent.
"Then, why ignore me altogether and push me away? Why not talk to me instead? I'd have understood that."
"I don't know. You need to talk to him about that."
I nod and finish my drink and signal for another one.
"Maybe, you should slow down on the drinks. I've never seen you drink so much."
"We have an off day tomorrow, and I plan to spend it in bed. Watch some Hallmark movies, or read some kinky romance books, and ignore everything for a day."
"Dom and I plan to head out and explore a bit, and you’re welcome to join us." Ivy offers.
"Nah, I don't want to be your third wheel. It’ll just remind me of everything I can't have, because my brother prefers I be alone and miserable."
Ivy's face goes soft, and I look down into my drink, because I don't want to see pity or God knows what else there. It is what it is. I will move on after the tour and find another causal relationship. Preferably one that doesn't propose after three months.
The concert wraps up, and I roll my eyes. Ivy knows the basics of what’s going on with Dallas, Landon, and me, but she doesn't push, and that's why I like her. I don't want to talk about this anymore, and she doesn't force me, too.
I brace myself, because I know the guys will be here soon. Then, Ivy will be with her sexy husband, and I will need to decide my best course of action. I should get up and let Dom and Ivy walk me to the bus, but I'm frozen in place, when Dallas walks into the room. Why does he have to be devastatingly handsome?
When they enter the room, Ivy leaps into Dom's arms, and they head off to the bus just like every night. I'm so happy for them, but I want that, and it seems like Landon is making damn sure I'm not going to get it. Fuck him.
When I look over at them, that same girl is flirting with Landon again, and he's soaking it up. I can't stand her, and even more so after talking to some people on the tour with us the last few days. When my brother busts out laughing, good ole liquid c
ourage mixed with some truth serum hits me and mixes with my anger that I've been stewing on for a week now. I'm up and across the room pushing people out of the way, until I'm standing right in front of the girl, whose name is some flower I can't remember right now.
"Hello, Landon," I say, as sweetly as I can.
He cocks his head to the side and studies me. "Austin."
"Oh, you do remember me. Huh, never would have known."
"What are you talking about?" He asks.
"You asked me to do this tour remember?"
"Of course, I remember." He shifts on his feet, looking a bit annoyed.
I'm proud of myself for resisting the urge to punch him in the face just like Dallas taught me. Let him explain a black eye to the press.
"Then why have you been ignoring me for the last week?"
His eyes go wide for a fraction of a second. "I haven't been ignoring you."
"Come on, Landon, when was the last time we lied to each other? Other people have even noticed you’ve been going out of your way to avoid me."
"Well, if you treat him like this, I can understand why." Flower girl says, and I turn to her.
"Oh, and you need to stay away from my brother. You aren't good enough for him. He doesn't need some whore like you. I'm not allowed to date anyone, then neither can he. He wants to stick his nose in where it doesn't belong, then I will, too." I look back at Landon. "What happened to that sweet girl at the charity you wanted to ask out? Oh, now I get why she said no, because you wanted to whore it up on tour. Good job. I'll make sure she knows that, too. I hope she’s dating someone else by the time the tour is over for her sake." When I finish my rant, the entire room is silent, and Landon's eyes are wide.
The next thing I know, Dallas is in front of me.
"Come on, let's head back to the bus." Dallas tries to take my hand, but I yank it away.
"Oh, now you want to talk to me. Fuck off. Both of you." I turn to leave, but in one quick motion, Dallas grabs my arm, flips me over his shoulder, and starts walking.
"What the hell are you doing? Put me down, asshole!" I start beating as hard as I can on his back, but I'm easily distracted by his ass, which is right in front of my face.
"I’ll set you down, when we get to my dressing room. Looks like we need to have a chat."
"You have had a whole week to 'have a chat,' but no, you ignored me too, so fuck you. I want to go home. I'm done with this tour, and I'm done with both of you." I start pounding on his back again.
"Too bad, because I'm not done with you," Dallas says, and then a door closes, as he sets me on my feet.
Oh, shit. The smoldering look in his eyes says I'm in a whole lot more trouble than I thought.
Chapter 10
Dallas
"Come on, let's go back to the bus." I try to take her hand, after she gets finished yelling at Landon and the girl next to him.
She yanks her hand away from me. Crap. Everyone in the room is watching, and Landon is shooting me his pathetic 'please help me' eyes.
"Oh, now you want to talk to me. Fuck off. Both of you."
“Damnit, Austin. It looks like we need to have a talk.” I say.
So, when she turns to storm off, I do the first thing that comes to mind. I bring her back to me, which is pretty easy with her being drunk, and then I flip her over my shoulder and storm out of the backstage area towards my dressing room. I send up a silent prayer that she doesn't puke all over me, before I get there.
"What the hell are you doing? Put me down, asshole!" She starts beating on my back, and I smile even though, I know it would piss her off even more. She has some fire in her.
"I’ll set you down, when we get to my dressing room. Looks like we need to have a chat." I tell her.
"You have had a whole week to 'have a chat,' but no, you ignored me too, so fuck you. I want to go home. I'm done with this tour, and I'm done with both of you." She starts pounding on my back again.
Oh yeah, we need to talk. There’s no way I'm letting her leave the tour early. Because I know if she goes home now, she will pack up and be gone, before we get home. Not an option.
"Too bad, because I'm not done with you," I say, as I enter my dressing room and close the door behind me.
I put her down on her feet with her back to the door. Staring into her eyes, I reach past her and lock the door.
Then, in order to get my emotions under control, I turn my back to her for just a moment. Carrying her like that; having her so close, was such a turn on, even when she was yelling at me and cursing at me. After a few deep breaths, I can get my cock to go down enough that I can turn and face her again. She hasn't moved one inch.
"You’ve been drinking, baby girl?" I ask her, even though, I already know she has. Making a note to myself to remember to say something to Ivy about not letting her drink like that. I know she’s her friend, but it could get her in serious trouble, if the wrong person noticed and tried to take advantage of her.
"Yes, so what? Why do you even care?" I can hear the irritation in her voice, but there’s also underlying hurt.
I hated our show tonight. She wouldn't look at me, when we sang. She'd rather look out at the crowd, and that's when I knew I was losing her. I hadn't realized Landon had been avoiding her all week as well. I thought giving her space would let the two of them work things out. No wonder she's all worked up and hurt.
"What was that outburst about?" I ask, keeping my voice soft, because I don't want to give her another reason to go off on me. Not until I have my answers.
"He thinks he has a say in my life and can drive you away, so why can't I have a say in his life? Besides, I can't stand that girl."
Can't blame her there. She tried to attach herself to me at the beginning of the tour, and when I told her to keep away, she latched on to Landon. That’s his business, and I figured he was using her for some fun, but she's been around him at every stop. But that's not the issue I need to address right now.
"Drive me away?" I ask her. I need to know what's going through her head. I've given her space, yeah, but Landon hasn't driven me away.
"You have avoided me all week. You’re out of the bus, before I get up and come home late. You won't talk to me or even look at me."
Damn, I really thought she and Landon were working things out. I didn't realize he has been avoiding her too, or I wouldn't have stayed away, but I was never far away. I knew where she was, and what she was doing. I was always right here in case she needed me, like tonight.
I've spent the last week trying to get my life in order, so I can be the man she deserves. At some point, I will need her brother to be on board with this, and it's going to take time. So, I want to lay the groundwork now and get everything in order, because staying away isn't an option anymore. I plan to make her mine, but I want to do it the right way.
"I just need some time, baby girl. I need to make sure I do this right, and that I'm good for you. Will you give me some time?" I ask her, trying to beg her to understand with my eyes, but it doesn't work.
She rolls her eyes "Getting some last action in?" She turns to try to leave, but I'm on her, before her hand reaches the door.
I pin her to the door with my body and rest my arms on either side of her, caging her in.
"There’s no one but you. There hasn't been anyone, since you’ve been back, and even a few months before that. There won't be anyone but you. You got me?" I make it perfectly clear and lay it on the line for her.
With her being drunk, I know we will have to have another talk tomorrow, but I don't want her going to bed and stewing on this making it into something it isn't.
She looks up at me unsure, almost fearful to believe me, but I stay strong for us both. She’s scared and has been hurt before. I'm not backing down and plan to prove to her that I can be the man she needs.
Finally, her eyes drop, and she nods.
"Good, now let's get you back to the bus, so you can sleep this off," I tell her.
I pull m
y phone out and shoot a text off to Landon.
Me: Hey, I have Austin. I'm going to take her to the bus. Maybe wait an hour, before coming in? She's still really mad at you, and I think it's best to just let her get to sleep.
Landon: Okay. I’ll hang out here and do some damage control. I'll talk to her in the morning.
Me: Go easy on her. She's hurt, even if she went about it the wrong way. I'll text you, once she's asleep.
I put my phone back in my pocket and look back at Austin. She has been watching me with this questioning look on her face.
"You good to walk?" I ask her.
She just nods, but I put my arm around her waist anyway and head out to the bus with her. The security guy walks out with us, and then opens the bus door for me, while I help get her inside.
"Need help getting ready for bed?" I ask her.
She looks like she’s considering it, before she shakes her head no and goes to her bunk.
Sitting on the couch, gives me the best view of the bathroom door, and I wait for her to come out.
What a mess. It's been hell this last week staying away from her, and it looks like it did no good. In fact, if anything, it made it all worse. It's not like I enjoyed myself this week. I've spent the last week contacting the girls I used to just call up for a quickie any time I wanted. I didn't owe them anything, but I wanted to end it and tell them I was seeing someone.
Austin deserves that, so no one thinks they have a claim on me but her. There were about eight different girls that I used to call, a few from our popular stops, and two more back in Nashville. Most of them didn't care; a few asked me why I even bothered.
One seemed upset and said she had no problem being my side piece and could keep things under wraps. Sadly, she was also one of the ones in Nashville. I wasn't so nice to her, making it very clear I wanted nothing more to do with her. She never seemed clingy or attached before, but she was also the one I'd take as a date, if I needed to have one for a record event. I guess, she read too much into it.