Wild Keepers

by Dee Bridgnorth

  He was back home, no better and no worse. Just the same. As he swallowed the last mouthful of his food, she could see him start muttering his eternal sentence. It was always the same. In the fourteen years since he had been like this, he never said anything else, even if he was being spoken to. Just the three words, over and over like a broken record.

  They are coming.

  Usually they just ignored him. Only once, when she had been around sixteen, had she decided to question him about it. Ask who was coming. But he had not even registered that she had spoken, and after asking five times, she gave up. His mind was just stuck in a loop for some reason, and it didn’t carry any significance.

  Keeley poured the coffee into the mugs just as her mother walked into the kitchen, placing the empty bowl and spoon in the sink. Keeley silently passed the coffee to her, thinking that she looked tired. There were bags under her eyes. The stress of the past week had taken its toll on her.

  “Sit down, Mom,” she said softly, placing a hand on her arm. “I’ll do the dishes.”

  “Thank you,” sighed her mother, sitting down and sipping her coffee. “I need this. I’ve found it harder and harder to get up these last few days.”

  Keeley sat down opposite her, sipping her own coffee. “I want you to take a break today. It’s Saturday, and I can take over. Go and visit Shannon. I’ll buy you a bottle of wine to take there.”

  Her mother smiled slightly. “I don’t think wine would be a good idea. I don’t need to be any foggier than I already am.”

  Keeley frowned. “Just a couple of glasses, Mom. Relax. Go and have a giggle with your best friend and dance to that old eighties music that you both love. You need a day off.”

  Her mother sighed. “It would be nice. I haven’t danced in a long time.” Her face brightened momentarily. “Did I ever tell you about the discos your dad and I used to go to? He told me that he used to watch me dancing with Shannon but could never pluck up the courage to speak to me. Until one night he knocked me over on the dance floor trying to breakdance to ‘Thriller’.”

  Keeley laughed, trying to picture her father breakdancing, but it was impossible.

  “He wasn’t good,” said her mother, rolling her eyes at the memory, and laughing as well. “Probably one of the worst breakdancing I’ve ever seen! But we got talking, and then we danced together, and then…”

  “Mom!” Keeley wrinkled up her nose in mock distaste. “I don’t need to hear anymore!”

  Her mother sighed, picking up her coffee again. “Those were the days,” she whispered. “We were so young and free. Everything ahead of us. We wanted to travel, you know. But then you came along, and we never got the chance.” She took a deep breath. “I still think of the trips we never took. What it would have been like.”

  Keeley rested her hand over her mother’s hand on the table, squeezing it hard. “When you go to Shannon’s today, I want you to talk to her about the two of you taking a girl’s trip away. A hot tropical island somewhere.” She paused. “I’ve been saving money, and I want you to have a holiday.”

  Her mother’s eyes widened. “Oh, Keeley, I couldn’t. Keep your money for a holiday of your own. You should travel while you are young. Don’t worry about me.”

  Keeley’s hand tightened on her mother’s. “I want to. You need a break. A longer break than just a few hours here and there. It’s so hard on you, Mom. I will speak to Dean and arrange to take some time off to look after Daddy.” She took a deep breath. “I won’t take no for an answer.”

  Her mother’s eyes filled with tears. “You are such a darling,” she whispered. “I don’t know what I would have done without you. Daddy would be so proud of you, you know that, don’t you?”

  Keeley smiled sadly. “I hope he would. But we’ll never know, will we?” She paused. “Mom, I wanted to talk to you about something before you head off for the day.”

  Her mother took another sip of coffee. “What is it, my love?”

  Keeley took a deep breath, placing both hands around her mug. This wasn’t going to be easy. But she had to do it.

  “What was Daddy doing?” She stared at her mother. “In the weeks before…it happened.”

  Her mother looked blank. “What do you mean?”

  Keeley looked down at the table. “Where had he been? Had he spoken about anything that he was working on, or doing? Anything out of the ordinary?”

  Her mother’s lips tightened. “Keeley, there’s no point in this,” she said quietly. “I know you are convinced that something happened to your father to make him like he is, but sometimes these things just happen in life.” She paused. “You aren’t still trying to get that silly book translated, are you?”

  Keely ignored her question. “I need to know, Mom.”

  Her mother sighed, staring out the kitchen window. “Well, he was distracted,” she said slowly. “He would go into the study and shut the door after dinner, poring over something.” She frowned. “And he was away for a few days prior. He told me that he needed to find something out.”

  Keeley blinked. “He was away? Where was he?”

  She racked her mind, but she couldn’t recall her father being away in the days prior. All she remembered was that he had been absent that night at dinner, and then waking in the middle of the night seeing him sitting at this very kitchen table, rocking back and forth. How had she forgotten that he had been away?

  “He didn’t say,” said her mother. “He just packed his satchel, with his notes, and left. It was out of character for him, to say the least. I was a bit concerned at the time, and in the years since I have thought that something was happening in his mind. Perhaps it was already starting, and he was panicking. Thinking that if he got away from it all, he could ignore it. Perhaps he was already having signs that something was going wrong.”

  Keeley frowned. “Maybe. Or maybe wherever he went, and whatever he did when he was away, caused it to happen.”

  Her mother stared at her. “Oh, Keeley, how can that be?” She shook her head. “No, I think it was already starting, and he was panicking. He didn’t want to face it or tell me. Maybe he believed that if he got away it would disappear, and he would be okay. That makes more sense.”

  Keeley nodded automatically, but her mind was snapping in all directions. She needed to find out where her father had been. But how? Her mother said she had no idea, and Harry Gibbs, the editor of the Magnet at the time, had said he wasn’t working on a story for the paper. Or not one that would involve him going away for a few days. Harry had said he had no idea about the book, and that it must have been a side project.

  “Keeley, there isn’t any point to this,” her mother said, a little wearily. “I know that you think if you discover what your father was working on it will solve it, but at the end of the day, even if there was some connection it won’t change anything. Daddy is still the same, and always will be.”

  Keeley’s face darkened. Why was everybody the same, telling her to let it go? She just knew that something had happened to him. He had been a healthy, fit man of only thirty-six at the time, with no family history of strokes or anything like that. His own mother and father were still alive and vital, living only two blocks away. It made no sense.

  She knew the facts. The doctors had said that sometimes these things were inexplicable. Healthy, vital people could be struck down out of the blue. It was just life. Move on and accept it.

  But she couldn’t. She just couldn’t.

  She stood up, suddenly, gathering up the empty coffee mugs. She placed them in the sink, then turned back to her mother.

  “Go and have a shower, Mom,” she said, gently. “And I’ll go and buy that bottle of wine I promised you.”

  “Are you sure?” Her mother was trying to keep the relief out of her face. “It would be nice to have a break.”

  “I’m sure.”

  Her mother wandered off, and soon Keeley heard the water from the shower start. She walked into the living room, staring at her father.
He was still gazing vacantly at the television. The talk show had ended, and an old war movie was playing. The sound of bombs exploding and guns firing filled the room.

  She turned back to the kitchen sadly, just as her phone started vibrating on the kitchen table. She walked over and picked it up. It was an unknown number. Curious, she pressed answer.

  “Hello?” She turned back so she could watch her father.

  “Keeley?” It was a man’s deep voice, hesitant. “It’s Thad Morgan.” He paused briefly. “I wanted to know if I could talk to you about your book.”

  Keeley’s eyes widened in surprise, and she slowly smiled.

  ***

  Thad parked the Chevy out of the front of the house and turned off the engine, scanning the numbers quickly. There weren’t many houses on this street, and they were spaced widely apart, spanning at least half an acre each. Yes, he was in front of the right one. Number eight. Now that he was here, all that he wanted to do was restart the truck and head straight back to the cabin.

  He had sat with the phone in his hand for half an hour, trying to pluck up the courage to call her, and even when he had half of him was praying that she wouldn’t pick up. If she ignored his call, then at least it would appease his conscience. He could tell himself that he had tried, at least, and put it behind him.

  He got out slowly, walking towards the house. He had been surprised when she had invited him to her house, asking if he could come today. He had been expecting that if she actually picked up and still wanted to speak to him she would have arranged a time next week. He had been put on the spot, well and truly, and couldn’t think of a single reason to say no. At first, he had been surprised that she hadn’t suggested meeting out, but then he remembered that Coyote River’s only café would be closed on a Saturday afternoon, and there was nowhere else in town.

  He gazed at the house. A ramshackle old weatherboard that looked like it needed a new lick of paint. He noticed the wide wraparound veranda, with huge trees overlooking it. Keeley’s red hatchback was parked in the driveway. He stepped up the front steps, and taking a deep breath, rang the doorbell.

  He could hear footsteps coming down the hallway. Suddenly, he was extremely self-conscious about his scraggly beard and old clothes. Maybe he should have made an effort. But then he felt a stab of anger at the thought. He didn’t have to impress her. This was who he was now, and everyone could just take it or leave it.

  It was too late now, anyway. The door was opening.

  Keeley. She was dressed more casually today; he was used to seeing her smartly attired in her work clothes. She was wearing a faded blue t-shirt and khaki shorts, and her golden hair was hanging loosely down her back. He felt a faint stirring, which he tried immediately to suppress. There was no doubt she was beautiful. He had always thought that the measure of a woman’s true beauty was how she looked when she was at home, just pottering around. No makeup or artifice.

  Keeley Walters passed the test with flying colours. Her skin was incredible; pale and peachy, and so very soft. He tried not to look at her long golden legs, displayed to full advantage in her shorts.

  She beamed at him, flashing perfect white teeth. “You came! I was half expecting that you might cancel.”

  He smiled awkwardly. “Here I am.”

  There was a slight pause, before she pushed the door open wider, beckoning to him to follow her. He closed the door behind him and walked down the hallway, trying again to not look at her legs. Instead, he gazed around the house, taking note of the framed family photographs hanging on the walls.

  She led him into the kitchen. “Coffee?”

  “Please.” He sat down self-consciously at the table. He could hear a television playing loudly in the next room. Either he had interrupted her, or someone else was at home.

  She brewed the coffee, then sat down opposite, staring at him. He noticed that her light blue eyes had a slight greenish tinge to them in the light from the kitchen window.

  “Were you watching something?” he said, indicating the television in the next room.

  She sighed. “No. Daytime television isn’t my thing.” She hesitated for a moment, then seemed to decide something. “Come and meet my dad.”

  Thad’s eyes widened in alarm. What would her father think of him, a bearded stranger visiting his daughter at home? He didn’t know if he was up to an interrogation. Even making the effort to visit her had been hard enough, let alone dealing with a suspicious father.

  “Sure.” He stood up, following her into the living room.

  A middle-aged man was sitting in an armchair, staring at the television with wide, vacant eyes. He didn’t even glance up as they entered the room. The program seemed to have bewitched him somehow, Thad thought, glancing at the television. He had to stifle a noise of surprise when he saw that it was just an extended infomercial about exercise equipment.

  He gazed at Keeley, confused. Her father still hadn’t looked at them or acknowledged that they had entered the room in any way. And then he noticed that the man was muttering under his breath.

  “Daddy,” said Keeley, in a loud voice. “This is Thad. He lives near the lake where we used to fish. Up in the mountains.”

  No response. The man just kept staring at the television, his eyes stuck to it like glue.

  Thad felt a stab of pity go through him. There was something very wrong with her father, and it looked like he had been this way for a while. He noticed the man’s slightly slack jaw and weakened limbs, which seemed to rest haphazardly in the chair. As if the muscles had atrophied.

  Her father was an invalid, and it seemed he was very far away in his mind, as well.

  Keeley turned to him, her blue eyes clouded. “That’s my father. It’s easier for you to just see him rather than explain, I find.” She took a deep breath. “Let’s have that coffee.”

  Thad nodded, trying not to gaze at the raw pain in her face. She was trying to be cheerful and nonchalant about it, but he could see how much it cost her even doing this. They left the man to his program and walked back into the kitchen.

  Keeley placed the coffee in front of them and turned to him. “You look a bit shocked.”

  “Sorry,” he said, picking up his mug. “I just wasn’t expecting that.” He paused. “Has he always been that way?”

  She smiled archly. “Hardly. I wouldn’t be around if he had, would I?”

  Thad looked down at the table. “What happened?”

  Keeley sighed. “No one really knows,” she said slowly, sipping her coffee. “He was fine until I was eight. And then he was found wandering a road in his current state. Muttering. Vacant.” She took a deep breath. “And he’s been like it ever since.”

  Thad swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat. “I’m sorry.”

  She waved a hand dismissively, but she wouldn’t look at him. “It’s fine. Well, it’s not fine, but there’s nothing to be done, is there? We make do, my mom and I. His muscles have weakened in the years he has been sitting in that armchair. He can barely walk anymore.”

  Thad sipped his coffee. “How many years?”

  She took a deep breath. “Fourteen. It’s been a long time.”

  He gazed at her, not knowing what to say. The burden of what her family must endure was crazy. Living with someone you desperately loved and remembered as whole and seeing them gone. It was like her father had died but his shell remained.

  And he could see how much Keeley loved her father. It was in the slight pucker above her eyebrows as she spoke of him, and the pain in her eyes. She was trying to make light of it, but she couldn’t quite manage it. Somehow, he could see that it was as fresh for her as the day that it had happened, all those years ago.

  “Your mother takes care of him?” he asked gently.

  Keeley nodded. “She is his full-time caregiver. I help when I can, but I work full time. My grandmother comes and helps out as well.” She paused. “Mom is out at the moment, seeing a friend. I said I’d take care of him for the da
y. She needs a break, especially after the week we’ve had.”

  He raised his eyebrows. “What happened?”

  She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “I’m surprised you haven’t heard on the grapevine,” she said slowly. “He had a bad turn and had to be rushed to the hospital. But he recovered, so now it’s back to business as usual.”

  Thad shook his head. “I haven’t been into town since I last saw you at the general store. I don’t hear anything of what happens in Coyote River generally.”

  Her smile widened. “No, you keep to yourself, don’t you? It must be a nice life, living in that cabin by the lake. Nothing to do but fish and walk the mountain trails.” She stopped suddenly. “I’m so sorry. I know you are there for a reason…”

  He swallowed painfully. “It’s okay. I just needed to be by myself for a while.” He tried to smile, to make light of it in the same way that she was doing with her own pain, but he couldn’t quite manage it.

  There was an awkward silence, as they both drank their coffee, trying not to look at each other. It was like a weight of pain was lying between them. Their own individual pain that neither wanted to bring into the light with each other. Thad stared down at his hands, trying to think of something to say that could move them past it.

  “So.” Keeley took a deep breath and smiled. “You said you wanted to speak to me about my book?”

  His eyes widened. He had been so distracted by the story of her father and her circumstances that he had almost forgotten the reason that he was here. His heart started to beat a little faster. He didn’t want to look at that book again. Not at all.

  But since Evan’s visit, he hadn’t been able to stop brooding about it. How she had come to him for help and he had brushed her aside, claiming that he couldn’t help her. He felt guilty. That wasn’t him—or, at least, it wasn’t the man that he had always thought he was. Maybe Evan was right. He was wallowing in self-pity and needed a direction.

  His mind still shied away from going back to Covenester. The thought of even entering the city again made him feel dizzy, and the notion of reforming the Wild Keepers was beyond him. But maybe, just maybe, he could help Keeley while he was processing it all. The man that he used to be wouldn’t have hesitated in the slightest.