Gliese 581

by Christine D. Shuck

  Recently Sam and Daniel’s schedules had lined up, which had resulted in multiple encounters in the hallways, outside of the Ready Rooms, and in the Mess Hall and Entertainment Deck. And of course with Daniel’s new study schedule, that meant seeing her here in ‘Ponics as well. Daniel had volunteered for additional cross-training in medical and botany.

  “Tell you what Deeks, why don’t you shove this squash up your...” Daniel began.

  “Now, now,” her hand on his arm was all it took to take his breath away, “Don’t fight over me, you two.”

  Daniel was about ninety percent sure that Deeks was just messing with him. He was also relatively sure that Sam preferred him over Deeks. His best friend on Calypso had really cranked up the flirting since Daniel had begun getting closer to Sam, which in turn had caused him to find more excuses to spend time with her.

  The latest had been the shameless excuse to study under Sam, who was stunning physically in addition to being a brilliant scientist. If challenged, Medry would have admitted that what a woman thought was far more important than how she looked, one of the many reasons he felt so at home on Calypso. He was surrounded, after all, by autodidacts, “tens of tens” who tackled new ideas and learning like couch potatoes tackled salsa and chips, with gusto and enthusiasm.

  Daniel grinned, sure now that Sam was flirting with him. She was beautiful and smart, the perfect combination.

  “I just can’t imagine what you are talking about, Dr. Sydan.”

  Sam laughed and handed him a tray of sprouts, “You need to get back to work on those back rows, Medry. And don’t forget, we still have the squash to tackle.”

  For the past month, Daniel had been assisting Sam as they grew a unique strain of squash along the west wall of the ‘Ponics Deck. The vines hung from straps attached to the walls. Any space that could be spared was taken up with vigorous vines. There were now flower buds forming, and since they were in a spaceship and didn’t particular enjoy the thought of 40,000 honey bees sharing their living space, they would have to pollinate all of the female flowers by hand to ensure fruiting occurred.

  Deeks, seeing the sparks between the two, and not as dedicated to standing in Daniel’s way as it may have appeared, headed for the door.

  “I’ll see you later, Medry.”

  He stopped short of leaving, turned on his heel and asked, “Hey wait, Sam, do you play poker?”

  Sam’s eyes lit up, “I can’t say that I have much lately, but I used to play poker with my uncle.” She laughed, “He would rob me blind of my holiday candy. Valentine’s, Easter, Halloween, Christmas - the old man was merciless.”

  “Well, that’s perfect! We have a group that gets together every Friday, after Third Shift, beer, and poker, in the Mess Hall. Can I count on you being there?” Deeks asked.

  Currently, everyone on board Calypso was assigned rotating seven-hour work shifts, while also adhering to the twenty four hour “day” they had left behind on Earth. The general consensus was that when they arrived at Zarmina’s World, they would continue this practice since time without regular sunrise and sunset had no real boundaries. Being used to a twenty four hour day, and with no real reason to change in the twilight world they would occupy, it made sense to continue the practice.

  Sam nodded, “I usually work out on the Recreation Deck, get in my strength training and run some laps, but I guess I could put it off until Fourth Shift or go the next morning. Yeah, sure, count me in.”

  Deeks clapped her on the shoulder, “Excellent, I’ll see you there!”

  He saluted Daniel, “See you on Friday, Medry, prepare to lose all your money, you owe me.”

  Considering that Daniel had lost to him last week, he could only assume that Deeks was calling a debt in for making sure that he had a chance to connect with the Sam Sydan outside of a work capacity. In which case, Daniel certainly would owe his friend big time.

  The next few days flew by quickly. He was learning some basic surgical techniques from Dr. Schrader and had assisted her with two small procedures. There were two other major experiments in potatoes and mustard greens going on using a reproduction of the red dwarf star’s light spectrum. It was essential to understanding how much of a reduction in viability and production they could expect once they were on-planet. The hope was that, at least for some crops, they could be grown without UV lights, to conserve resources.

  The next Friday evening, Deeks, Medry, and Sam sat down in the Mess Hall with Wes Perdue and Zach Jenkins for their regular game of poker. Sam fit in with the group quickly, beating them all soundly two Fridays in a row.

  “After all,” she pointed out, “my uncle taught me everything I know.”

  It would be two more weeks after that before she mentioned she had played poker competitively, managing to pay a huge chunk of her way through college on her winnings. By that time she had cleared most of them out of their alcohol rations, entertainment allotment, and even collected IOUs that would keep her from having to deal with cleaning duties for the next two months.

  On the fifth Friday, only Daniel showed up for the regular Friday poker round. By a quarter after the start of Fourth Shift, and the rest of the guys a no-show, Sam cashed in some of her alcohol rations and treated Daniel to several schooners of beer. She had helped grow the yeast on the ‘Ponics Deck and was rather proud of the hoppy ale.

  “Tell me about growing up in Alaska.”

  Sam’s face lit up. “I grew up in the smallest, backwoods Podunk town you can imagine. More than two hundred miles from Juno, it had one pre-fab building that was a combination energy station, grocery store and post office. Other than that, and one hundred families scattered over nearly fifty miles, there wasn’t much of what you would call civilization.”

  “I’ve told you about Luke, now you tell me about your family.”

  “My family? A pack of independent oddballs, I’m surprised any of us survived childhood, we were always getting into some mess. There was this time when we were grilling steaks in our backyard...”

  As she spoke of her family her face turned first wistful and then mischievous as she described growing up with four other siblings.

  “So our dog had the steak in his mouth, and the bear was chasing after Benji, trying to get the steak. My brother Tom, who was in his idiot stage at the time, is chasing both of them because, as he explained later, that had been his steak and he wanted it back.” Sam was waving her hands in the air as she re-enacted the moment, “And all I could think of was that Dad and Mom were going to kill us for not paying attention to the grill!”

  After they stopped laughing, she said, “Your turn. Tell me more about growing up in Washington. I want to hear a funny one.”

  Daniel thought for a minute, “There was this fishing trip we all took a couple of months before we lost my mom to cancer...”

  He shook his head, “Wow, that’s a downer. The cancer I mean, I...”

  Sam’s hand covered his. “Go on.” Her eyes held his gaze.

  “Mom was feeling okay, even though she had just had chemo, so we went out on a three-day fishing trip on the lake. We fished all day and didn’t catch a single damn thing. So we were pulled up on shore that night, dinner was done, and I thought, ‘I’ll just throw in the line one last time.’ I’d had such bad luck all day and that waterdog I’d been fishing with was long-dead, but I figured I’d give it one last go.”

  He paused, his eyes shining at the memory. “Mom was asleep there on the cushions at the back of the boat and I tossed in the line one last time. Only just as I’m waiting and wondering why I’m not hearing the line plunk into the water, my mom jumps up screaming.”

  He snickered, “See, I had hooked her blouse with my fishing line and that dead, cold waterdog had slid down into her shirt and against her skin.”

  Sam snorted and shuddered at the thought.

  “She was screaming and jumping and my dad was trying to get it loose. Meanwhile Luke and I were laughing so hard we could barely breathe. That was
something, I’ll tell you!”

  He laughed for a moment before sobering at the thought of his mother. They had never gone fishing as a family again, and Mom had died less than two months later.

  “I miss my brothers.” Sam said, as if reading his mood.

  “Yeah, me too. Luke and I fought like hellions when we were young, but I miss him a lot.”

  They were quiet for a moment, and Daniel finished the beer, tipping the flask to get the last drops out.

  “I’ve got my own bear story,” he said, reaching over to run his hand along her arm.

  “Yeah?” she didn’t pull away.

  “Yeah, it’s true. It was a stolen bear.”

  “What? Okay, now you have to tell me!”

  He shook his head. “Uh uh.”

  “What do you mean, uh uh? That’s not fair at all.”

  “Gotta kiss me first.” He winked at her.

  “Well, that will cost you another beer.” Sam fired back a smile on her lips.

  They flirted and edged closer to each other as the night wore on. Eventually, they found themselves walking to the Living Quarters deck, their steps slowing as they reached the beginning of the rows, unwilling to part ways just yet. Medry found his hand reaching for Sam’s, a silent question hovering on his lips.

  On the Living Quarters deck, between the long rows of individual crew coffins, were couples billets. There were twenty of them in all, tiny spaces that included a bed and a tiny band of space with built-in storage above and below the bed. The built-in storage could also be converted into a small bunk. These would only be used at the end of the journey for the families with children. It wasn’t that much more room than an individual coffin but the Couples Billets served their function well for chance encounters, budding relationships, or for actual couples to live and sleep together if they were on duty at the same time. As for the rest of the billets, during the voyage, they were assigned on a “first come, first serve” basis. There were only a handful of married couples on board and while one or the other was in Cryo, the individual coffins were used, leaving as many “couples billets” open as possible.

  They were standing in front of one now and suddenly the liquid courage he had imbibed seemed to vanish from him. A silence cleaved the air between them, Medry looked down at Sam’s slender, long fingers intertwined with his.

  “Shall we take this one?” Sam asked, her voice steady, saving Daniel from some fumbled come-on.

  He hadn’t slept with anyone since months before they left, a record for him, one which seemed to have robbed him of his normal lady-killer charm.

  Daniel nodded and they each pressed their thumbs on the touch screen. The door opened. Shared rooms, during this long voyage, were strictly for couples. The Environmental section of the ship handled setting up the couples billets for any long-term assignments. Otherwise, it was a one-use type basis - the thumbprints would be required simultaneously anytime anyone wished to enter the billet. It minimized misuse. The individual coffins weren’t the most comfortable of sleeping situations, but using them meant more room for storage modules, which were of course filled with every possible item Calypso’s crew would need to survive on Zarmina’s World.

  Daniel and Sam stepped inside and after a moment spent securing the door and kicking off their ship shoes, they fell into each other’s arms. Hours later, sated and drowsy, they held each other, nestling close, skin still slick. Sam’s hair, a mass of black curls, lay spread against the shared pillow ridge.

  “I was wondering if you were ever going to make a move, Medry.”

  Daniel laughed, “I guess I’m a bit out of practice. It’s been, well, it’s been since before departure for me.”

  His thoughts flashed to a casual hook-up in a bar, shortly before departure. She had had flaming red hair, piercing green eyes, and been quite, athletic.

  “Anyone special?” Sam asked, her fingers drifting lazily across his chest.

  “No, I guess I tend to keep it casual.”

  Janine’s words haunted him, “After all Daniel, you aren’t really dad material. It just isn’t your style.” Who was he to be in a relationship? That was for guys like Luke, or Deeks, who, despite his incessant flirting with Sam and others, had given his heart to Kit Tanner and wasn’t going to let go anytime soon.

  Sam’s fingers paused for a second, before resuming their meandering.

  “So, you’ve never gotten serious? About anyone?”

  Daniel realized then what she was asking. Of course she would ask, it was normal, it was expected. They were all heading for a planet devoid of other humans. And it was natural to seek someone out who might be a good match for a mate, for someone to be a potential father of her children. That was what Sam was asking.

  Billions of miles away, his son was growing up without him. Toby was better off, missing him as his uncle, not knowing he was something more. It just isn’t your style. A good father doesn’t leave his child, doesn’t let him be raised by someone else. A good father, even a half-assed decent one, sticks by their kid, raises them and does dad things. Daniel had closed the door on that possibility the moment he let his brother think Toby was his. He didn’t deserve to be called Dad, not by Toby, not by anyone. She deserved to know that, to not be misled or pin her hopes on him. He wasn’t dad material, he wasn’t even a good mate.

  “I like you, Sam,” he finally said, “You are sexy and beautiful and smart. You play a mean game of poker and I really liked tonight. But uh, I’m not really into kids and I suck at relationships. I just don’t want you to get the wrong idea here about us, or where we might be going.”

  Her fingers stopped moving. Sam sat up, her hair cascading down her shoulder, brushing soft tendrils across his arm and chest. She was so damned beautiful and he liked her, a lot, he couldn’t help but want to be with her. A part of him suddenly felt sick, he had said too much. In not wanting to disappoint her, he had pushed her away. Her gray eyes searched his, it felt as if she was reading the book of his soul, understanding the secrets within, places he didn’t even understand or want to go.

  Her voice was steady, but her eyes showed disappointment.

  “I’m really sorry to hear you say that, Daniel. I think that,”

  She paused for a moment, searching for the right words.

  “I don’t think you’re the person you have just described. But for now, I’m going to go.”

  Crap. “Wait, Sam, I’m sorry, I...”

  Medry searched for words to fix what he had just said because he could see he had hurt her, this amazing woman who made him laugh, challenged him mentally, and who he had just had the most amazing sex with.

  “Please don’t go.”

  She reached for her clothes, slid them on, and then leaned over and kissed him.

  “You are a good man, Daniel Medry, a far better one than you might care to admit. I think you are selling yourself short, thinking that way, and I don’t think this is the real you talking. But I’m going to go now.”

  And with that, she was gone. Daniel watched her go, his protests dying on his lips. The next morning was his day off, the following morning was business as usual. Sam treated him as she had every other day he came in ‘Ponics, although she now avoided any possibility of their touching, preferring to put distance between him and her. She told the guys that she had taken on a new study series on Friday nights and couldn’t make the poker games anymore. Wes and Zach both heaved a sigh of relief, but Deeks gave Daniel a steady look of disapproval that first night. He had seen them laughing in the Mess Hall and knew that something had happened between them. But neither Daniel nor Sam talked about it, no matter how much Deeks dug.

  He had blown it. Daniel recognized. It would occur to him at odd moments, a flash of memory, Sam’s body next to his, the feel of her skin, soft and silky, covering the hard muscles underneath, and the intimacy they had shared. As much as he tried to tell himself that it wouldn’t have worked, he couldn’t help feeling a deep ache of regret.

&nb
sp; What Have We Done?

  “I’ve found out why people laugh. They laugh because it hurts...because it’s the only thing that’ll make it stop hurting.”– Robert A. Heinlein

  Date: 02.09.2099

  Earth – Kansas City, Missouri

  Tom Hainey stared at the briefing folder in his hands. It was nearly six in the evening. The sun had slipped beneath the horizon and dark clouds scudded menacingly in from the west, promising snow and more frigid temperatures. It was a Friday, and he should be at home with the children. Especially now, with Edith gone. His stomach rumbled and he felt a dark band of fear constrict his chest.

  Tommy and Joseph, neither of them would even speak to him now. They were both still stunned at their mother’s loss, as was he. Tom had moved back into the house temporarily after Edith’s sudden and quite public death. His girlfriend had objected, loudly. He had stared at her and said nothing. She was loud and garish, her lipstick a blood red, her nails painted to match, and her hair was frozen in place with an overabundance of hairspray. Why had he not noticed this before? What had seemed bold and adventurous now struck him as uncouth and immature. Gina was young, just four years older than Tommy.

  “I don’t see why you have to move back into the house,” she had said pouting, “They were fine when she was out of the country.”

  Tom felt a surge of anger. Edith was dead, the children all in shock and this stupid little girl could only think of herself.

  “That was a week. And I checked in on them every day. She isn’t coming back, Gina. My kids, look, I just have to go. You are welcome to stay here, I’ll pay for everything.”

  He had been doing that already. The most she had contributed since moving in was to buy multiple bottles of wine, which she then drank herself.

  She gave him a look.

  “Well, I sure would hope so.”

  She batted her eyes at him, and Tom couldn’t help but think she fit every stereotype that had ever been written about young girlfriends.

  “Will you check in on me every day?”

  How had he messed up so badly? What the hell had he been thinking? Edith had been with him, true to him, through everything. They had gone through the deaths of their parents together, seen tough times, and made three beautiful children.