He pauses and then offers his hand. I slip mine into his larger one and sit holding hands with him. “I’d like that, and I promise to stop flirting with you.”
I smile. “Really?”
He groans. “Woman, I may be a loner but I’m not blind.” He laughs. “From this point forward, I have a friend.” He then adds, softly, “I think I like the idea of having a girl who is a friend.”
“I like the idea too. The only friends I’ve ever really had, have been my cousins or my brother, so it will be nice having a friend who isn’t part of that.” I then tease, “Someone who can give me advice about men and what they want.”
He roars with laughter. “I’m sure you’ve already figured out that most men just want to get their dick’s wet. In other words, sex. They’re not too fussy either.”
I fight not to blush at his words, and add, “You’re not like that, I don’t think so anyway, and neither is Derek.”
“I’m not going to lie, if you’d have accepted my many invitations to dinner, I would have given you my all to get into your little panties … there’s not that many women around here who look as hot as you.”
I snap my mouth closed and narrow my gaze. “I’m not sure whether I’m supposed to be insulted or delighted about that.”
“Delighted. I wasn’t insulting you. You’re a beautiful woman, Madison, and I’ve seen the way Derek looks at you. He’s noticed too. If age wasn’t an issue, then you’d already be his. That’s one thing I’m sure of.” Geary offers a small smile. “He’s a lucky bastard to have a woman like you in love with him. I just hope he realizes that before you settle and give your heart to someone else.”
I stare at him for a few moments and then tell him, “I’m so glad you’re my friend Geary, and before you leave this porch, we’re going to exchange cell numbers. Friends need to be able to call each other when they want to talk or need help with something. Friends also have weekly coffee dates.” I grin, and grabbing his hand, kiss his knuckles. “You’re not alone anymore.”
He clears his throat and looking off into the distance, he squeezes my hand. “Thank you, Maddie.”
I’m not sure how we went from flirting to friends, but I’m not going to complain because I think I’ve really needed a friend here. I’ve seen him around a few times and he always looked so lonely. Perhaps I’ll work out a way to introduce him to Olivia. They’re both lonely and I know my cousin, she won’t be able to take her eyes from Geary. Once she gets to know him, she won’t be able to walk away either. He may be God like on the outside, but he has a big heart on the inside.
34
Derek
My jealousy rises as I listen to Madison talk to Geary out on the back porch, neither of them aware I’m home. I’m also not in the habit of spying, but when I heard my name I couldn’t help but stop and listen. My initial impulse had been to interrupt but curiosity had gotten the better of me, which was why I now stood in my kitchen wondering what the hell to do, and whether or not I should make myself known.
The jealousy that rips through me at the thought of Madison with Geary being in bed together is ridiculous considering I refuse to go after the woman myself. I can’t expect her to stay single forever, and until I’d overheard Geary mention invitations to dinner, I’d had no idea that anyone else was interested in her. Silly really, since she’s so beautiful. But Maddie has slipped into my heart, and it hurts because I can’t do anything about it, I won’t let myself. I want her but can’t have her.
With a heavy heart, I decide to ignore the two out back and go about making some sandwiches for lunch. Dee had wanted to have lunch with me, but I’d come up with an excuse for having to head home, alone. I have a headache forming and her constant chatter wasn’t helping.
As I pull things out of the fridge, I realize that after having no woman around for years, I now have two. One I’m in love with, and the other I’m using to keep me away from the first.
I’m an asshole.
I shouldn’t be using anyone, and it really isn’t like me, but I’m under no illusion about Dee’s feelings for me. I know all about her lack of money, which is the sole reason she’s latched on to me so quickly. I only wish I’d been thinking when I’d first asked her out. It had been a spare of the moment decision, a diversion when I’d nearly caved and followed Madison up to the room I’ve given her to paint in.
Sighing heavily, I pull bread out of the basket and start to make cheese and ham sandwiches to go with the soup I’ll heat.
Glancing at the door, I walk out onto the porch and find Madison alone. “Geary gone back to work?”
She raises a brow and answers. “He said he had lunch waiting for him.”
“I have lunch waiting for you.” I grin.
She smiles, and grabs hold of my outstretched hand. “I could definitely eat.”
“Hmm, I love the sketch.” I nod toward her art pad lying on the table.
The light sketches are amazing and I’m seriously thinking of having them framed for my home office. “Don’t throw them away, please.”
Her eyes follow mine and she softly smiles. “I have no plans to. I’m fond of the sketches, there’s beauty in the unfinished.”
“You’ve captured everything.”
“I don’t think I’d ever get tired of this view,” she comments as I pull her inside with me.
I gently push her towards a chair at the table and serve up the sandwiches and tomato soup. I do have a housekeeper who comes in every few days, which is usually around the time I’m getting fed up of my own cooking. She’s due in this afternoon and my mouth waters at the thought of her homemade lasagna that I happen to know is on tonight’s menu.
“Talking about view. I’ve noticed how much you like it out there. Even the hottest parts of the day, you don’t really move.”
Her eyes sparkle as she smiles at my observation. “It’s so clean and fresh, and quiet. I can hear myself think. Until I’d arrived, I had no idea how much I would fall in love with the place.
“At first, I looked at it as just a job—a commission, but it’s all just gotten to me and I love it here. I miss my family and maybe my daily Starbucks, but it’s worth it.” She hesitates as though she’s about to say more. She doesn’t and concentrates on her lunch.
Was I expecting her to tell me that I was worth missing her family and Starbucks for? That’s exactly what I wanted her to say, but what would I have done if she had? Nothing. I can’t do anything, and it hurts.
I don’t want her to leave.
The words on the tip of my tongue stay buried as I clamp my mouth shut, I decide from this point forward, I’m going to be the perfect host. Instead of trying to ignore her presence other than at meal times, I’m going to make sure she enjoys her time here and leaves with only fond memories. I’m sure I’m capable of being the kind of man who doesn’t take advantage of having a young woman under his roof … even if my heart craves having her with me for the rest of my life.
“Take the afternoon off,” I suggest, smiling now my decision has been made. “I want to take you to the street market this afternoon.” I chew on my sandwich and watch her mind ticking away. “I’m serious Maddie. You’ll love it. Homemade cakes and jams, flowers, painters, coffee…”
She giggles. “Okay, you sold me at cakes.”
The smile she gives me causes a reaction in my body that I really shouldn’t be having, but as long as I’m careful I don’t see why we can’t spend time together. All of my previous reasoning against us spending time together has completely flown out of the window. I’m not really sure what I’m doing, but I do know that I want this.
Maybe I’m making a mistake. In fact, I know I am. But with her smiling at me the way she is, I’m not sure I care.
For now, I’m going to do what my son, Tanner, keeps telling me to do. Have some fun. Me and fun haven’t gone together in a very long time. So, I’m about to discover what I’ve been missing, and I just hope I have the strength to stay away from Madiso
n. Nothing more can become of our friendship. We can be friends like she’d suggested to Geary, right? Even though I’m hopeful, something tells me I’m delusional.
35
Madison
On the way into town I keep waiting for Derek to tell me Dee is meeting us there, or that he’s made a mistake and has to get some work done. But nothing like that happens. He looks relaxed behind the wheel of his truck. The clothes help him look more relaxed. A dark blue T-shirt stretches across his chest and the faded denim of his jeans molds to his thighs. He looks nothing like the business man that I’m used to seeing when he leaves the ranch, he looks happy.
He parks the truck on the busy street and stares ahead before turning to me, a serious look on his face. “I want you to enjoy yourself today, Maddie. I miss seeing you smile.”
“I haven’t had a lot to smile about lately,” I admit with a heavy sigh.
Derek reaches forward and to my surprise, his large hand gently cups my blushing cheek. “That’s why I want you to have today to have some fun, with me.” He offers a wry smile. “It’s been a while since I’ve had any fun too.” He pulls his hand back and slides it down his face. “Too long really.”
The sexual tension in the truck becomes unbearable so before I do something I know he doesn’t want, I hop out from the truck. He follows at a slower pace and I meet him in front of the truck.
The sidewalk bustles with people today, with the street market looking enticing. I haven’t seen anything quite like this before and excitement fills me as I turn and grin at Derek. “This is going to be fun.” I don’t give him an option and slipping my hand into his, give him a slight tug to move him along with me.
It isn’t long before we get swept along with others, but Derek wraps an arm around my waist to guide me to the bakery stall. Just the sight has my mouth watering. “Oh, how am I going to choose?” I grumble.
Derek laughs in my ear sending goose bumps through me. “They’ll keep a few days in the fridge.”
Getting pushed from behind he ends up plastered to my back with his arm anchoring me to him. I’m not complaining, he feels really good, but the woman behind the stall is giving us an odd look, making me feel uncomfortable. Not enough to move though.
I turn my head and get Derek’s attention. “I blame my cousin, Sofia, for giving me a sweet tooth.” I grin. “She’s a baker and I’ve spent years testing her creations.”
He grins, looking into my eyes. “Then choose a few. Who cares if we’re still eating them in a few day’s time.”
Turning back, I smile at the woman who has a sour expression on her face and ask her to box a total of eight cakes. Derek laughs, but insists on paying.
“Thank you, Leah,” Derek says and gets a huff in response.
He carries the box of cakes and comments, “Perhaps we shouldn’t have bought these so early.”
“They would have been all gone otherwise.”
“I have an idea.” He takes my hand to keep me with him and I trail behind as he enters the drug store. We go to the far back.
“Darrin, can you do me a favor,” he asks. “I have something that needs to be in a fridge.”
Darrin grins. “You want me to look after them for you until later?”
“Please.”
“Only if you introduce me to your friend.”
Derek chuckles and does the introductions. Darrin looks to be in his eighties if not older and certainly has a way with the ladies, if the two elderly women watching him are anything to judge by. But then I frown and wonder if it’s Derek and me they’re actually watching. Shaking my head, I come back to the present and realize both Derek and Darrin are waiting for me to reply.
“Um,” I mumble, embarrassed.
Derek takes pity on me. “Darrin was asking how long you are in town for?”
“Ah,” I’m not sure how to answer because I want to say forever, but instead I’m totally honest, “maybe another week.” I feel Derek still beside me as his intense gaze heats my face.
“I see.” Darrin clears his throat. “Well, maybe you will stay longer.” He chuckles and taking the package from Derek, disappears behind a door.
The tension between us is back although I’m not sure it actually went anywhere. “What about preserve,” I blurt out and walk back the way we came. “I saw some on the way in here,” I add over my shoulder.
Scowling, Derek follows but his mind is obviously elsewhere. Probably the same place mine has been. I don’t want to leave the ranch. I love it there and I find a feeling of peace that seems to exist nowhere else. The buzzing in my head stops and I no longer feel as though I’m drifting. But I can’t stay forever. He’ll move on with his life, just like I have to move on with my own. Not that I want to unless it includes Derek, but that isn’t going to happen.
Blinking back tears, I pull myself together and look through the jars of preserve at another stall. It looks really good, but in the end, I only select a blueberry jelly while Derek stays silent beside me.
Moving away I think our fun day has turned sour and all because I was being honest about how much time I needed to be here for work. I could have lied and prolonged my visit, but I don’t think that would do either of us any good. I need to get out from under his feet.
I jump slightly when Derek gently grips my elbow, steering me toward the Ferris wheel. It isn’t busy right now, but as I watch it go up into the sky my stomach rolls.
“It’s been a long time since I’ve ridden one of those.” His smile reaches his eyes when he turns his body towards mine.
“Have I ever mentioned that I don’t like heights?” I watch the wheel turn again as I nervously chew on my lip.
“Madison, look at me.” Derek moves closer and with a gentle touch, lifts my gaze to his. “I promise to protect you, if you come and ride it with me.” His eyes search mine causing my body to tingle and my heart to pound.
I lick my lips as the subtle scent of his cologne teases my senses, and it’s only when his eyes flutter shut that I realize how much of my heart had been displayed on my face for him to see. I deeply inhale, pulling myself together. Slipping my hand into his, I look up to meet his gaze as he lifts his lids slowly.
“Let’s go and ride the Ferris wheel.” I grin. “But we need cotton candy first.”
He laughs, squeezing my hand. “Whatever the lady wants, she shall have.”
“I wish,” I mumble and feel him momentarily pause beside me. “I’m sorry.” My eyes hold his no matter how tempted I am to look away. “This is why I’m going to leave earlier than we had originally planned. If I’m not here, it will be easier.”
“No, it won’t.” Derek shakes his head and leads me toward the cotton candy, and after purchasing one, announces, “We can share.” He tugs me eagerly along and before I know it, we’re being seated in the chair on the Ferris wheel.
“You know, I’m not sure why I agreed to this. I really don’t like heights.” As soon as it moves I grab onto Derek so tight I’m not sure I’m going to be able to let go. “Maybe I should have told you how bad I am.”
Derek wraps his arm around my shoulders, allowing me to bury my face in his chest. “I told you that I’d protect you.” He kisses the top of my head, so I lift my face to his.
“Will you kiss me?” I ask, searching his gaze. “Just once.”
A hand comes up and caresses my face. “I can’t.”
Tears come to my eyes at the rejection, and I hear him curse under his breath, before he says, “Just one kiss with you, would never be enough.” He offers a wry smile. “Look out at the view. I promise you’re safe with me.”
I slowly nod and inhaling, turn my gaze to the view while concentrating on my breathing. I don’t release the hold I have on Derek, and it feels good being like this in his arms. It’s taking my mind off of the distance between the ground and my dangling toes. “The Ferris wheel never used to scare me,” I admit. “As I child I went on the wheel with Paige and Rachel.” I smile at the memory and loo
k at Derek. He returns my smile, brushing a finger down the side of my face. “Paige was terrified, which set Rachel off, which in turn, set me off. I thought we were all going to fall out by the time it had finally stopped. My legs shook, and we were all white as three little ghosts. I’ve never been on one since.”
“I get that, but I’ve promised you’ll be safe.”
Derek tucks my head against his shoulder and I settle in for the ride, enjoying the feeling of being in his arms.
36
Derek
The ride slows with us at the top and the fear I sense in Madison has me pulling her closer than what I should. My heart thumps with longing for the woman in my arms, which makes me feel guilty for using Dee in the way I have. Dee actually annoys me, but I think part of that is because I’d rather be spending my time with Madison. It’s wrong and the moment Madison leaves, so does Dee.
We slowly move lower and my arm tightens around Madison, not wanting to let her go. Even when my heart sinks at the sight of Dee, I can’t let her go. Dee hasn’t seen us yet, but Geary has as he moves closer while Dee yaps on. He really has no time for the woman, and but for Madison, neither would I.
I know the moment Madison spots Dee because her withdrawal is noticeable. I want to tell her not to worry about the other woman, but I don’t. By the time it’s our turn to move from the wheel, I take Madison’s arm to make sure she’s steady, and the pain in her gaze when she turns to thank me, hurts.
It hurts a lot.
My eyes follow her as she moves toward Geary while I catch Dee from the corner of my eye moving toward me.
Well, my day with Madison has soon come to an abrupt halt.
The damn woman must have a sixth sense or something because she’d been asking me to accompany her here. I’d kept telling her I was busy, trying to avoid too much contact with her, and secretly, I’d known I wanted to bring Madison instead. I wanted to watch her smile for me the way she does for others, instead of the smile of sadness I seem to receive.
McKenzie Cousins Box Set 2 Page 15