Party Hard

by David Petrie

  Farn had passed her limit a while ago and was now holding the device back by sheer will alone.

  She hadn't heard anything from the gap in almost a minute. Farn checked Kira’s health. She was fine. Then, without warning, the levers released, moving past their stopping points as if all the resistance that she had been fighting against had vanished. The surprise drop caused the others to fall backward, their hands slipping from the handles.

  Farn was the only one still standing, horror washing over her as the resistance returned and the lever pulled away, back to its starting position. She tried to stop it but couldn't. She looked to the gap, expecting it to slam shut at any moment. It didn't.

  The party looked at each other in question. Then several loud noises sounded from the wall, followed by the motion of the slab rising up to ceiling height. They were already running before it even came to a stop, Farn and Max in the lead.

  She expected to find Kira standing there on the other side, waiting and laughing about making them hold the levers for so long. Instead, they found her leaning against the wall next to a small switch. Her arms folded tight, holding her sides like she was cold. She looked away, in the direction of the far side of the next hallway, clearly trying to avoid eye contact with anyone. For a moment, silence engulfed the space.

  "At least there aren't any monsters on this side," Max commented as if ignoring the mage altogether.

  Farn assumed he was trying to distract the group from his partner's condition and give her time to recover, so with that, she moved onward without saying more.

  The group followed Max down the hall, the fairy trailing behind. Farn hung back to walk next to her.

  Kira looked down at the ground and shuffled along beside her, then stepped closer without saying anything.

  Farn felt Kira’s shoulder brush against her own. She was shocked to feel her shaking. She looked down, and Kira glanced up before turning away just as fast. It had only been for a second, but Farn saw so much in her eyes. She looked desperate for comfort, like she wanted nothing more than to be held by someone. Farn raised her hand to place it on the shaken fairy’s back but stopped just short, afraid to actually touch her, afraid she might make things worse. Then she let it fall back to her side.

  The hall widened, and the ceiling grew higher, relieving the claustrophobic feeling of the place. Farn noticed Kira breathing deeper, her shoulders relaxing now that the walls weren't closing in on her.

  Max pointed toward the ceiling. "I hope this big hallway is a design choice and not Carver making room for large monsters."

  It was a bad joke, but Kira smiled anyway. It made sense. She probably just appreciated the distraction.

  Kegan jogged to the front of the group and turned. "I kind of hope we do run into some enemies. I have a couple new arrows to try out."

  Max looked at him sideways, "Really? Did you break down and buy those feathers from Ginger?"

  "Not all of them. Just enough to craft two." Kegan pointed to his quiver, where a couple arrows glinted in the firelight with silver fletching. "I wasn't going to pay that much for all of them - no matter how cool they are."

  "Oh, you will." Ginger rubbed her hands together like a villain. "You can't resist me forever."

  "What do the arrows do?" Corvin asked out of curiosity.

  Kegan shrugged. "No idea. They don't even have a name in their description."

  "Must be a new item." Corvin sounded impressed.

  "I know." Kegan clapped his hands together. "Apparently, no one's ever crafted them before. According to my journal, I get to name them."

  "Any ideas?" Corvin sped up to catch up to him.

  "Nah, I'm going to wait ‘til I know what they do first."

  "Hold up," Max butted in, cutting the chatter as they came to a split junction with two paths heading in opposite directions.

  There was a brief debate on which path to take, but strangely, Corvin was the one to decide. His authority on the subject came from a piece of chalk that he pulled from his pouch. He drew a simple arrow facing right to mark the direction that they chose. Not long after, they hit another junction.

  Max let out a sigh as it became apparent what kind of dungeon they were in. "It's a labyrinth." His arms dangled in front of him.

  "So much for getting this one done quickly." Kegan held out his hands empty as if giving up.

  Corvin abandoned the idea of drawing arrows at each of the forks in the path and just placed the chalk against the wall as they walked. That way, as long as they followed one side, they would be able to find their way through without having to think about it. It was cheating a little, but it was also the fastest solution.

  Max held his torch in one hand and holstered his gun with the other. The previous dungeon had lacked any form of monsters other than the boss, so it stood to reason that this one might be the same. He relaxed and placed one hand to his chin. "So I have a question."

  "Yeah?" Kira responded, her voice coming out weak.

  He continued, "Now, this is really just me thinking out loud. But the gap under that door was just big enough for you to fit through."

  Kira sighed and rolled her eyes.

  Farn took over in an attempt to spare her from being involved in the conversation and thinking about her ordeal. "What's your point?"

  "How did he know?" Max answered her question with a question.

  Farn wasn't sure what he meant by it.

  "What I mean is, this whole quest was something Carver set up way in advance and hid within the system years ago, so it had already been here for a while before tonight."

  "Okay," Farn answered, still not quite seeing what he was getting at.

  Corvin jumped in. "You're wondering how he could have known to set the gap at that height when most players wouldn't fit through it?"

  "Exactly!" Max turned and walked backward to face the others as he spoke. "How could he have known that we would have a fairy in our party that could squeeze through when all other races would have just gotten their fat asses stuck?"

  "Hey! My ass isn't fat." Kegan spun around to look at his own butt.

  Everyone else ignored him.

  Corvin stopped walking for a moment. "It could be that the door was designed so that it would only open just enough for our smallest party member. Carver probably set it with a variable to keep the space as small as possible to maximize the physiological effect."

  "Well, it worked. That was easily the worst experience of my life." Kira shuddered and stepped closer to Farn.

  This time, Farn raised one hand to Kira's back, making contact and giving a gentle pat in an attempt to console her. With that, the tension in the fairy's body melted.

  Kira returned the gesture with an appreciative smile, the slight physical contact clearly doing wonders for her mood.

  Then, almost on cue, they came to another door.

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Max winced as Kira’s face fell at the sight of another stone slab blocking their path. He was pretty sure he knew what she was thinking. She was debating on if it would be okay to turn tail and run, though he also knew she wouldn't, not after going through so much already.

  To the side of the door was a single lever. Max gripped with both hands, not wanting to drag things out. He pulled back with all his strength, expecting the same struggle as before but was caught by surprise when the lever slid back without resistance. He stumbled backward, letting out a sudden, "Fuc’," as he lost his balance.

  The lever snapped back to its starting position as he fell into Kegan, who did nothing to catch him as he slid down to the floor. Max grabbed at the Leaf's sash for stability, almost pulling his pants down.

  "Yar! What the hell?" the elf squealed as he struggled to hold them up.

  "Sorry." Max released the Leaf's clothing.

  Kegan straightened himself out. "You should be. I'm not ready for that kind of relationship. I mean, sure, maybe I've thought about it, but really, there's just too much of an age gap between us.
What would people say?"

  Max ignored him as he got back up, hearing a couple snorts of laughter from Ginger. He ignored her as well and went back to the lever. Again, it moved easily. A loud metallic clank came from the walls, and the slab began to move.

  Relief swept over Kira’s face as it rose higher than before, continuing until it was even with the ceiling. It was still a massive slab of stone hanging above their path that could crush them if it fell, but at least there was enough room to walk under it upright.

  Max released the lever, half expecting the path to slam shut the moment he let go. It didn't.

  Not fully trusting the passageway, Max decided to go through in two groups. Corvin, Ginger, and Kegan went first, leaving Max and Farn to tend to Kira, who still seemed a little shaken.

  If he was honest with himself, Max regretted letting her crawl into the gap earlier, despite it being the only way to proceed. He hadn't thought it was that big of a deal at the time, but in the years that he had spent with Kira, he had never actually seen her upset in either world - real or virtual. Annoyed sure, but never on the verge of tears. For it to affect her that much, the ordeal must have been far worse than he imagined.

  He felt stupid, almost like he had taken her for granted. He wanted to ask how she was doing, but he had trouble expressing his concern. They were, after all, bros, and bros didn't ask about their feelings. Instead, he waited until an awkward silence fell over the three of them, which wasn't long. Then he let out a quiet sound from the corner of his mouth. An unmistakable sound executed with precision.

  Farn looked at him sideways with one of her eyebrows raised as the slow, airy sound of a quiet fart slipped from his lips.

  Kira snorted a laugh as it caught her off guard. "That was a good one."

  He laughed too. "Yeah, I totally nailed it."

  Kira repeated the noise, this time getting a chuckle out of Farn as well, who made an attempt of her own. It came out a squeaky with an unexpected turn at the end that got a big laugh.

  Impressed by her version, Max spent the next few moments trying to imitate it. The somewhat immature noises grew louder as he demonstrated the healing power of fart sounds.

  Kira smiled, looking more like her usual self. Then, from down the hall in the direction of the other half of their party, came the loudest sound of flatulence that Max had ever heard in his life. The source of which became clear when he heard Ginger, of all people, laughing.

  Max turned to look down the hall, making out her figure in the firelight of the torches. He almost couldn't believe his eyes as she placed both hands against her mouth to produce another textbook example of the standard elementary school fart noise. She had raised two kids after all. She must have learned things. It echoed down the hall toward them which only increased the silliness factor of it.

  Kegan called out, "I can't believe that I'm the one who has to say this, but if we get attacked by some kind of monster because you guys gave away our position with farts. It won't go over well."

  "Sorry," Max apologized, followed by a few giggles from Farn, the musical quality of Kira's laugh joining in. It was good to hear again.

  "Anyway, we're out the other side!" Kegan shouted back.

  Max responded with a simple, "Okay," and entered the passage with Farn and Kira in tow. He moved quickly, not wanting to take his time in the situation. Kira walked in the middle, as if it was safer, despite the fact that the formation would do nothing if the slab above them were to fall. Max tried his best to forget about it, telling himself that the path had remained open for a few minutes already, so it would probably stay that way. He was wrong.

  A loud ticking began from an unseen source inside the walls at regular intervals, then faster. Max had played enough puzzle games in his life to know what the sound meant. It must have been triggered when the last of them entered the passage. The slab was on a timer, and it was running out.

  Max turned to Kira and told her to leave them behind in a tone that told her not to argue.

  She obeyed without protest, sprouting a glowing pair of wings and taking off down the hall, leaving a trail of magic in her wake as he and Farn ran for their lives behind her.

  He threw down his torch in the hope that it would help him move.

  Farn did the same and as the ticking grew faster.

  Together they sprinted toward the flickering light of their friends at the end of the passage. Almost there! Just twenty more feet. They could make it. Then the ticking merged into one long buzz as the intervals between them disappeared. They had seconds at best.

  A loud bang came from behind, followed by another, causing Farn to glance back at the slab hanging over the hall. She gasped. “It’s falling in segments!”

  Max didn't bother to look back, fearing the loss of a few precious milliseconds. He just assumed from the terrified expression on her face that it was bad and that he didn't need to see it, too. From the sound of the impact of each section slamming into the floor, there had to be enough force to make sure no one would recognize his body if he got caught under one. He ran faster.

  The air pushed past him, thick and moist, as it was displaced by the falling blocks. It felt like the dungeon itself was breathing down his neck. The faces of the others became visible as they approached the end, each a shade of ghostly white. The section behind fell just as Farn passed out from under it. Max couldn't be sure, but he thought he heard it whack the tip of her sword's sheath on its way down. Then the final segment released.

  The solid block of stone fell in what, to Max, seemed like slow motion as his mind raced at speeds faster than ever before. He jumped with everything he had, shoving Farn with one hand. Not enough to knock her over but just enough to give her a slight boost of speed. They made it just as the last slab fell into place, grazing Max's boot as he leapt to safety.

  He rolled and shifted his weight when he hit the ground, making use of his momentum to help him recover. He came to rest upright with one knee planted to the ground. Then there was silence.

  It was dark, and the loss of two of their torches made it hard to see more than a few feet in the large room.

  "Well, that sucked." Max rested to catch his breath. "Starting to feel like that's my new catchphrase," he added before looking around the room for Kira.

  "I got a problem here!" she yelled to the rest of the party from somewhere above. Max looked up into the shadowed space of the room's high ceiling, the soft glow of the fairy's wings being the only source of light illuminating her figure. She seemed to be stuck in the air, one arm behind her back while her wings buzzed uselessly. With her free hand, she cast a light spell, throwing a ball of bright energy into the air. Max wished she hadn't.

  A massive spider web stretched across the ceiling of the room, complete with an equally massive spider in one of its corners. Its legs were pulled in tight to its body as if sleeping, but when enticed by the vibrations of Kira's wings, it moved. Eight legs extended, far longer than what he expected. It was huge, like a cargo van with fangs.

  "Holy crap! What the hell?" Kira yelled as the light of her spell reflected in the monster's eight gigantic eyes.

  Max drew his guns. "Don't worry; we got you!" he shouted to let her know he was there. The webbing around her was probably bringing the poor fairy right back to the claustrophobic feeling from before. He fired a few rounds at the spider, hoping they would at least push the thing back.

  Kegan did the same, but the spider only winced.

  Kira threw out a couple of Pulse spells aimed at its face, which did no damage but bought a few more valuable seconds.

  "Hey! You don't want that scrawny thing!" Farn shouted at the beast with her taunt active to give the words more weight to the spider. It looked at her for a moment but, eventually, turned back to the already captured prey.

  "I'm petite, not scrawny!" Kira yelled back as a bullet passed by her head so close that it displaced her hair. "The hell, man!" she shouted at Max while the spider crept closer.

  "H
old still, will you!" he shouted back as he fired at the webbing around her. She locked her body in position, putting her trust in his aim. He was just glad the webbing was thick enough to target.

  Kegan focused on buying time, and the creature took a critical in the abdomen. "The underside has a weak point. It’s small, right between the second set of legs," the Leaf called out.

  "Perfect. I almost have Kira free," Max called back as the helpless fairy struggled to lean away from the enemy. He kept firing until, finally, a section of the web broke free, and Kira dropped out, dangling from one last troublesome thread.

  Kira spun in the air upside down, causing a portion of the loose web to wrap around her, securing her arm to her back and her legs to each other. "I'm not sure how this is helping!" she yelled as the room spun around her.

  Max aimed, taking in a slow breath as he took out the last strand, causing Kira to release an uncharacteristic scream, that probably surprised herself as much as Max, as she dropped.

  Considering that the fall could very well kill her with her lack of hit points, Farn dashed in to catch her. Well, catch wasn't really the right word. It was more like a backward dive to break her fall. The lightweight fairy landed on top of her, still bound with webbing. Farn wrapped her arms around her like an action hero to make sure she was safe, Kira's head resting under her chin.

  Before either of them could recover, the spider dropped down to the floor with a loud thud, still focused on the tasty morsel flopping around on top of the Shield. "Oh crap," they blurted out in unison.

  Max reacted on instinct, jumping between them to block the creature's path. He hoped he could take a couple hits before he had to worry. He pumped a few rounds into the thing as it struck him in the leg, its contact dealing poison on top of damage. His health dropped by almost half as the status settled into the pit of his stomach, making him feel sick while depleting his remaining hit points little by little. He ignored it and stood his ground, firing another few shots. The spider wound up again, its other leg coming at him faster than he expected, and suddenly, the world winked out of existence.