The Reluctant Medium

by GG Anderson

  I had been thinking of her so much now, not being able to stand her being gone. So much had happened, with Tyler, and with the potential of my gifts coming back. I walked past the big house, looking longingly into the window, wondering if the child would be staring back at me.

  No such luck. The stained-glass window looked hollow in comparison. I missed the strange little face, and for the first time in a while, I started getting excited about the possibilities of seeing it again.

  Tyler knocked on my door just after I’d gotten back from dinner. His smile was cocky, and I couldn’t help but blush as I saw him.

  “Hey,” he leaned on the door frame, and I was suddenly hyper aware of the empty room just behind me.

  “Hi,” I held the door open and he walked in, assessing the space.

  “Which one is yours?”

  I pointed and he nodded, but then took one of the desk chairs instead. I sat across from him, feeling incredibly awkward. "So how was practice?”

  “Shitty.” He still smiled, stretching his long, toned legs out.

  “I’m sorry. Isn’t it supposed to be fun?”

  He laughed, “Not really. I mean, practice usually sucks.”

  My face crinkled up, “Then why do you play?”

  He tucked his hands behind his hat, pushing his brown curls forward beside his neck, “Because the games are like a drug. They are the best. The feel of the air on the diamond is like electricity pulsing through my veins. I can feel my skin react to the sight of the other team coming on to warm up. It is pure bliss.”

  “Oh.”

  I didn’t get it. Games were just not that much of the season. Practice was most of the stuff they did. “But if practice is bad, are the games really worth it?”

  He laughed and leaned over his knees. His eyes holding mine with a grip I couldn’t look away from. His breath blew out slowly, “Because even a shitty day on the field is better than almost any other day of the year.” He reached over to my knee touching it lightly. “What do you have going on tonight?”

  “Umm, same as always, homework and sleep,” I laughed. “For the record, homework is shitty too.”

  "Did you want to go grab a coffee or take a walk or something? This is one of the last nights the lights will be on downtown. Or did you and Moe already do that?” His smirk spread across his face making just one dimple show.

  “Speaking of which, that was so not ok. He totally saw that. You did it just to be a jerk,” I pushed his hand off my knee. “That is not cool.”

  He grabbed my hand and pulled me closer to him. “Hey, he was the one who asked for it.”

  “No, he didn’t. He asked me out. We went out, how is that asking for anything?” I pushed back and landed back where I was sitting.

  He lowered his eyes, “I’m sorry. I just wanted him to know we were back together.”

  I cocked my head and raised my brow, “Back together? When were we ever together let alone back together?”

  His face flooded with guilt. “Well, I mean, we were spending a lot of time together, so we were kind of together,” He shrugged, “And besides, it isn’t like you were into him. No harm no foul.”

  I folded my arms across my chest, “Boys are so weird. Yes, we spent time together, as friends. I have guys who are friends,” ok not really, but I could have if I wanted to. “And just because we were friends doesn’t mean you own me. It isn’t like we were dating or anything.”

  The memory of the girls telling me how jealous Tyler had gotten in the weight room came forward in my mind. “If you liked me, or wanted to date me, you could have asked like a normal guy.”

  He tossed his hands up, “I did! A ton!”

  I back peddled a bit. “Ok fine, maybe you did ask me out, but it wasn’t like we were dating, that’s what I’m trying to say.”

  “But we did go out once,” he leaned in again, “and you had a great time.” He barely was on the chair now, his knees touching mine.

  The air was growing thick, he was just so dang cute. “I did.”

  “And then you got sick and had to go home, remember?”

  Kinda. Not exactly how that went, but that’s ok. “So, what’s your point?”

  “My point is, I like you. You like me, so no, I don’t want another guy thinking about you. I don’t want another guy looking at you, and I don’t want another guy doing this,” his lips were on mine and I melted. What was I mad about? My mind swam, barely making it to the surface.

  I pulled away, "Ok, but you don’t get to say who I talk to, or who I am friends with.”

  His lip pulled up at the corner. “Like I could tell you anyway,” he shrugged as he wove his fingers back through my hair.

  That was it. I couldn’t think when he did that, his hands flexing in my thick mane made my mind forget my own name.

  His lips traveled to my neck again, and I seriously felt the chill in my toes. How did he know how to do that? His curls wrapped around my fingers and I marveled at how they felt. Like corn silk in late summer. Like Satin. I opened my eyes to catch a glimpse of it and screamed.

  My voice sent Tyler flying back and my entire body began to tremble with cold. I stood shakily and headed to my shelf.

  “Savanah, what happened?” Tyler’s words were lost in my brains focus to stay standing. To stay in the present.

  A knock on my door just added to the mayhem. “Damn it.” I grabbed the salt and headed for the door.

  I pulled it open to see my neighbor, peering past me into the room. “Are you ok?” Her eyes looked from Tyler then to me.

  I shook my head, still trembling, trying to find an excuse that would make this seem less ridiculous.

  Tyler’s arm was around my waist. “Sorry, she saw a spider. She hates them. Scared the crap out of me too.”

  I leaned into his arm, trying to show affection, and letting my neighbor know that everything was alright.

  “So, did you get it?” She looked around us, obviously searching for a dead arachnid or the remnants there of.

  “Um, no, it ran under the bed,” there, that explained my shaky form. “I will never sleep again,” I laughed a little.

  Tyler ran his hand up my back. Still providing support and trying to show comfort.

  “Ok, well good luck finding it.” She took one more glance around and headed back to her room. I lingered in the hall, door open to continue to prove that I was ok, that Tyler wasn’t attacking me. When her door closed, I sprinkled the salt heavily on threshold. How could I have been this careless? I hadn’t salted in months. My room was not protected at all.

  I shut the door, and Tyler waited patiently until I sat down. He resumed his place in his chair.

  I met his eyes ashamed that I reacted like that. “Sorry. That wasn’t your grandpa.”

  He smiled, “Well that’s good, because I was going to get really concerned if you had that type of response.” He grew serious. “What did you see?”

  I inhaled, “Well, I call him The Creeper. He is super sketchy and is just not good,” I shook a chill off again. “I have only seen him a few times, but never inside my room. Usually, I’ve seen him in the stairwells, and stuff like that. Never in my room.” My skin crawled thinking he had access to my personal space.

  “He’s been here before?”

  “Yeah, actually one time was the night of the basketball game. We were getting ready with the door open and he was standing in the hallway.”

  “And you have no idea who he is, or what he wants?”

  I shook my head, “I don’t want to know. He is evil. I can tell. He is just not – he’s not safe.”

  “Are you ok?” His voice was tentative, and I could tell he was waiting to relax until I gave the ok.

  I nodded, “Yeah, sorry. Mood killer, party of one,” I pointed to myself. “Good cover with the spider.”

  He nodded, “No problem. I hate them, so it was an easy one for me.”

  “You hate spiders?” I smiled slightly.

  “Yeah, they have
too many legs and not enough body.”

  “I have too many legs and not enough body” I smiled referring to my own long legs.

  “You have the perfect amount of legs and a perfect amount of body,” He smiled appraising my sitting figure on the bed. “Are you ok, like really?”

  “I am. It is just a lot. I didn’t expect to see him watching us, let alone in my room,” I shook off another chill.

  “So, what is with the salt?”

  I realized I still had ahold of the container and moved to put it back on my shelf. “Yeah, it helps to block their path. There is a whole thing that goes with it, but the salt should hold for right now.”

  “A whole thing?” His brows were creased.

  I shrugged and sat back down, “Yeah, I have been trying to keep things out of my private space since I was young. I mean, I wanted to be normal remember? I found this chant and salt and a few herbs seem to work well.”

  He processed that and nodded to fill the time it took for his brain to file away this new information. I wondered what it must be like for his mind to constantly be getting new pieces of the puzzle known as me.

  His eyes met mine and he grinned. “So, I guess it is official.”

  “What is?”

  “We are dating so you can use me for my abilities. My kisses bring back the undead,” he flexed his brows up and down at me.

  My eyes rolled and I laughed it off, but I couldn’t help but sense the warming in my chest. He had said it.

  We were dating.

  Chapter Fourteen

  The lights downtown were really pretty, the hot chocolate was cliché and silly, but it made the whole night feel special. Tyler was right. It was the last night the lights would be on. First thing in the morning, workers would begin painstakingly taking down all the holiday décor that ran along the tiny city creek.

  When we headed back to campus, I wondered if I would be able to focus at all on the homework I had completely neglected tonight. I wanted to crawl into bed and sleep blissfully, thinking about what a magical date it had been.

  Walking into the shower, and turning on the hot water however, instantly made me think of The Creeper.

  Why would I think of him now? The hot water defrosted my cold limbs, and the steam warmed my nose. The walk downtown wasn’t without the freezing temperatures that were normal for January here. The heat caused my feet to burn as I began to thaw out. I tried to force my mind to not think of The Creeper. Not wonder why he appeared in my room today. Why I saw him when I hadn’t seen anyone other than the small flash of Tyler’s grandpa.

  I finished and walked back to my room, wrapped tightly in my fluffy robe. I froze again, at the end of the hallway appeared his faint figure.

  It wasn’t stable, as in it flickered and the image came in and out. I squeezed my eyes shut, and opened them again, to see if the focus would clear up. It didn’t. He still faintly stood at the end of the hall, outside the stairwell door, staring at me.

  I walked quickly to my room, keeping the tiniest of view on him as I reached my door. Just as I touched my handle, he was right in front of me. My head sent a piercing pain through my mind and I tumbled into my room, almost falling. I shut the door quickly, trying to focus and keep my robe tightly closed. I opened my eyes to see Crystel with her girlfriend sitting on the bed, watching a show together.

  “Hey, sorry, I didn’t realize you were home. I thought you were out with Tyler.” Crystel’s eyes looked apologetic.

  “No, well, I was. I just got back and took a shower, I was freezing.”

  “Cool, well we were just headed over to McCain, did you want to join?”

  I stored my shower things, “No, I think I am going to turn in. I’m pretty beat.”

  Crystel shrugged, “K, see ya later.”

  I smiled as they walked out, then quickly changed into my pj’s. I had to do some research. I was too keyed up from the hallway run in. Then again, what research was I going to do? It wasn’t like I could just google seeing ghosts after a head injury.

  I pulled my blanket around my shoulders.

  My head pounded distantly, not as bad as it had been, but definitely worse than I’d experienced before my fall. It was different. It felt distant, almost smokey. How could pain be smokey? I rolled my eyes and exhaled deeply.

  Maybe sleep was exactly what I needed. Maybe if I just put my head down, it would allow my mind to clear and calm and stop thinking of The Creeper.

  Why him?

  And more so, why did the absolute wave of joy wash over my thinking that maybe things were returning?

  Obviously, it was part of me, and I was not as ok with letting it leave me completely.

  I closed my eyes.

  Dreams, strange and eerily realistic, flooded my mind. Shuffled faces, faded silhouettes that danced behind the gauzy fabric of my conscious.

  The eyes of The Creeper reached through the thin curtains penetrating so deeply that I startled myself awake. The room was filled with sleeping girls, completely oblivious that strangers have entered my dreams.

  I looked at the clock. 4:55 am. Well, that was almost a full night of sleep. I quietly got out of bed, slipping into sweats and a giant hoodie. Sleep wasn’t going to happen. No way would I be able to fall back into any kind of restful slumber with him right on the edge, waiting to get in. Grabbing my bag, I slowly slipped out of the room and headed to the 24-hour section of the library. Studying would keep him at a distance.

  As I drug out my books, I focused on the text, completely pushing all of this from my mind. That’s when it started to make sense when I wasn’t really thinking about it. That was what the dreams had been about before. The important image I couldn’t quite grasp.

  The Creeper had been in my room many times while my brain healed and I couldn’t do anything about it. After all, I couldn’t see him at that point.

  I shivered and picked up my books to move closer to the few students pulling the all-nighter or the super early birds who were engrossed in their work. Safety in numbers felt like a good idea.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Each day my mind seemed to get stronger. It was the end of January. I tried sleeping as much as possible, but more times than not I woke as soon as The Creeper entered my dreams. Tyler and I had hung out some, tried to contact his grandfather, but really with the shortened semester, homework was too demanding for much else.

  This day however, I felt the joy run in my veins, because today was the day Camryn came home. I couldn’t wait to see her and hoped silently that she felt the same way. She had posted several great photos on social media, and I could tell she had a fantastic trip.

  I tried not to be too needy, but seriously I couldn’t hold my own head on straight without staring at the clock every five minutes wondering when she would officially be back on campus.

  I shot her a text telling her to let me know as soon as she got here. Checking my phone every three minutes didn’t make it any less pathetic. FINALLY, at 3:00 pm she texted stating she was headed my direction.

  I met her in the lobby, throwing my arms around her, I just couldn’t believe how much I truly missed her.

  “SOOO, how’s Tyler?” Camryn couldn’t even wait three minutes.

  The red in my face rose like a thermometer. “He’s really good,” my smile refused to relax. “More importantly, how was Belize?”

  We prattled on about her trip, the snorkeling, and the jaguar sanctuary that they studied at. The cold January day seemed to get colder as she went on and on about her amazing trip. “Next time, you have to go.”

  “That isn’t even in my field.”

  “So? Change majors!” Camryn missed me too.

  I filled her in on the latest in the supernatural world, ending, all be it hesitantly with The Creeper in the hall.

  “I think he is bad. Every time you talk about him, it even makes my skin crawl. I do not know how you handle seeing him, especially right out of the shower.

  I shrugged. “I think I am s
upposed to help them. I think somehow, I am supposed to either help them cross over, or figure something out.”

  Camryn smiled, “Yeah, I saw that movie too.”

  I rolled my eyes, “I’m serious. When I had no sight at all, I wondered if it was because I hadn’t done what I was supposed to do with it. Maybe I had it taken away because I hadn’t wanted it. Now that it is back, or at least kind of back, I have to figure out why.”

  “Maybe it’s just the way it’s supposed to be.”

  “What does that mean?”

  She shrugged, “Maybe you are supposed to see the dead for the living as well as the dead. Maybe you are supposed to simply have this gift for the simple sake of having it. Sometimes it is important and sometimes it won’t be.”

  “Doesn’t that make me lazy?”

  “How does it make you lazy? Because you are not constantly trying to find the reason for everything and a purpose for every action? Maybe just knowing this is real, and knowing that you have it is enough?”

  I looked down at my feet not convinced, “Maybe, but if it is, I don’t see why to even have it.”

  “Who knows. I’m hungry, wanna grab food?”

  I shook my head, “No, I’m not hungry. Go ahead.”

  “If you’re sure,” she started texting someone, “If you want to join us, text me.”

  “Thanks, but I’m good. I’m glad you’re back.”

  “I missed you too.” She shut the door and I sat in the silence.

  Maybe I was over thinking this--shocking--first time for everything.

  But maybe.

  I grabbed my phone and typed out the message, “You up for something far out there?”

  Tyler was waiting at the foot of the stairs at Blachley. He kept moving because the cold, arctic temperature had brought its friend the wind with it tonight.

  “Sorry, I hope you weren’t waiting long.”

  “No, just got here.” We walked up the steep porch, and I focused on grounding. I took a hold of his hand as we approached the top step.

  We opened the door and exhaled the cold. I looked around and didn’t see my little ghost friend anywhere. I turned to Tyler without letting go of his hand. “So here is the plan. I am going to try and communicate with the,” what should I call it? “The resident of this house. Since I know they are stronger than others, I am not sure how this is going to go.”