by Erin Trejo
“I love you too. I always have, and I always will. You were always meant to be mine Molly. There was a time when I doubted it and I hated you, but I never stopped lovin’ you. I know it doesn’t make sense, but fuck. I’d give my last breath to see you smile.”
Molly lifts up and takes my lips with hers in a soft, sweet kiss that does the rest of the talking for us.
Chapter 23
Molly
My body aches as I walk to the kitchen to start getting breakfast ready. We’ve been back to Roland’s house for a few days now. I can’t say we’ve done much sleeping, it’s been like one big sexfest. Not that I’m complaining. I love being with him, but he has worn me out. This new Roland is a lot different than the old one, he still has the same heart though and for that I love him even more.
I grab the eggs and bacon out of the fridge and begin making breakfast. The sound of sizzling bacon makes me smile. It’s been so long since I’ve done this, just made an everyday normal breakfast for my family.
My family. I love the sound of that.
As I cook the eggs I can feel his presence behind me. Roland slides his arms around my waist as his lips caress my neck.
“Mornin’,” he says in that sexy, groggy voice that always makes me smile.
“Morning. You hungry?” I ask and look over my shoulder to see Roland grinning with that dirty glint in his eyes.
“I might be,” he teases as he nips at my neck.
“No more today. I am officially cutting you off,” I warn him.
Roland chuckles before kissing me once more. Then he moves toward the coffee pot.
“I didn’t hear you complain’ last night,” he chuckles as he sets up the coffee.
“Well, you will today,” I giggle.
Roland laughs as he grabs mugs from the cabinet.
“You feel like goin’ out later? I wanna take Drake fishin’,” he says.
A smile crosses my face. Drake has always wanted to go fishing. My heart swells in my chest and I’m forced to fight back the tears that want to fall.
“He would love that. He’s always wanted to go.”
“Good. I just need to run by the clubhouse first and then we can go,” he says.
The kitchen is silent for a few minutes in which we both move around doing mundane things like making breakfast together when it suddenly turns to chaos and screams.
Booming sounds vibrate the walls as windows shatter. The coffee pot that Roland has just been holding explodes as he drops it and lunges at me. The whole scene happens in slow motion. My body hits the floor with a thud as Roland lands on top of me. That’s when I hear it.
“Mom? Dad?”
I hear Drake’s screams and they’re like a stake to the heart. I scramble around trying to force Roland off me so that I can get to him, but he moves first. He’s yelling at me, but I don’t hear a thing. I watch as he stands and runs through the living room as more shots ring throughout the house. Crawling across the floor I go as quickly as I can until I get to Drake’s room. Roland sees me, grabs me by the arm, and drags me toward him.
“Get in the bathroom. Stay there and stay down,” his words hit me hard.
I grab Drake and we both move quickly into the bathroom to huddle together. Drake sobs not knowing what’s happening until we hear Roland screaming, “You motherfucker!”
More shots sound throughout the house, but I stay curled around Drake. We hold each other tightly and when the door is kicked open I scream. Roland stands in front of us with blood dripping down his arm. My heart nearly leaps out of my chest. It’s so wrong, but in this moment I see just how perfect he is. His chest is heaving for air and sweat drips down his body.
“We need to move. Get dressed,” he tells Drake.
Drake moves out of my arms and runs back into his room. Roland storms toward our room with me right behind him. I grab my shoes and quickly slip them on while he grabs his shirt and cut.
“Who was that?” I ask while knowing I won’t get an answer.
Roland looks over his shoulder at me and gives me the not now look. I don’t push my luck as I grab my phone and stuff it into my pocket.
“Get Drake. We’re goin’ out the back,” Roland says with hard eyes.
I nod once before I go down the hall to be greeted by my son with a smirk on his face.
“What are you smiling for?” I ask him a little confused.
“I never thought I’d be in a shootout mom. It was just like on the tv, only live!”
Drake’s expression is priceless, although I don’t see the excitement in nearly being shot to death. Roland chuckles behind me.
“That’s my boy. Let’s get out of here before they decide to come back,” he says as he moves past me and throws his arm around Drake.
“Did you see the hole in my wall? Do we have to fix it? Can it just stay there?” Drake asks like this is just one of his video games.
“You sure as hell are mine, huh?” Roland asks with a laugh while looking down at his son. I take this opportunity no matter how strange it is to just watch the two of them.
“Yeah. Do you get shot at a lot? Your arm is still bleeding dad. Wow. You got shot?”
I find myself wondering if I’ve let him play just a few too many video games.
“It’s just a graze. I won’t even remember it happened in a few weeks,” Roland says.
Is this normal? Why are they discussing bullet wounds? I want it to stop. I want to step in and say something, but the look on their faces has me shutting my mouth. This father and son interaction, even if the topic is a little out there, is magical. I can see them bonding and it makes my heart happy.
“Get in the truck. I’ll have Ink show you where that bullet is still stuck in his leg later,” Roland says. I see Drake’s eyes widen.
“Okay. I’m in,” Drake hollers as he climbs into the back of the truck.
Roland turns to look at me, waiting for me to get in as well, but I can’t move when the smile crosses his face.
“What?” I ask while shaking my head. I don’t think I can form words. Roland stalks slowly toward me bringing his hand up to cup my cheek.
“I love you, both of you.”
That’s all I need to hear. His lips press firmly to mine. It’s a soft, sweet kiss before he pulls back.
“Let’s go. We’ve got a date,” he says as he walks back around the truck.
“After all of this you still want to go?” I ask.
“Why the hell not? This ain’t shit. I know who it was and I’ll get it handled. I wanna take my boy fishin’ Molly.”
“We’re going fishing?” Drake squeals from the back of the truck.
Roland starts it up and pulls out while constantly checking his surroundings.
“You even been on a boat Drake?” he asks.
“No. Are we going on one?”
“Damn right we are. I’m gonna teach you how to fish.”
The excitement in both of them warms my insides. They are truly father and son. It makes me sad that they’ve missed so much of this together. I wish I could change the past, but there is nothing I can do but try to make the future better.
“Mom are you coming?” Drake asks pulling me from my thoughts.
“Why? This a boy’s only trip?” I ask teasingly.
“Hell no. It’s a family trip,” Roland answers.
“Yeah mom, it’s a family trip. Besides I want to see you get sick when I touch the worms.”
“That’s just gross. We aren’t touching worms Drake.”
“Like hell we’re not. How the hell do you think we’re gonna catch anything without touching worms?” Roland asks with a playful smile on his face.
“I don’t know, but not with worms.”
“God, I love you babe.”
Chapter 24
Reaper
I kept my cool in front of Drake and Molly. I didn’t want them to see how volatile the situation really is. I know that it was Ramirez’s guys. I can’t believe that fuck ha
d the balls to send them after me at my own house. Viking called the prospects and he has them on their way over to my house to clean that shit up, but that does little to ease my mind.
“Sit the fuck down,” Viking snaps at me.
“Fuck you. That was my family in that house brother. They could have shot my kid.”
Snapping back at him isn’t ideal. I need to remain strong for them, but fuck. How do you do that when some piece of shit was gunning for you when your wife and kid were in the house? It’s a tough pill to swallow. I’ve seen it with the other guys that had families and all, but I was the loner back then. I didn’t have anything to look forward to, but I do now, and that’s the part that scares the shit out of me.
Someone trying to take away the time I have left with my son is simply out of the question.
“I got a call out to Romans. They are lookin’ around to see what they can dig up. I sent Charlie and some of the boys out also just in case they decided to stick around. Ink’s callin’ around to see what he can dig up too. I want you on lock down here until we can figure this shit out,” Viking orders.
Fuck that. Fuck him.
“Can’t do that right now. I promised my boy a fishin’ trip.”
Viking’s head snaps in my direction and his eyes go wide.
“Are you serious? You just about got killed and you’re tryin’ to go fishin’? Reaper come the fuck on. You know he could be out there just waitin’ for you to take one wrong step!”
His roar means nothing to me. His fire, the way he leads his club, I respect the hell out of, but this is personal.
“You don’t get it Viking. My kid’s dyin’ brother. Maybe not today, but it is happenin’ and it’s coming fast. I need this time with him. Do you know how much of a fuckin’ failure I am? I failed him. His whole fuckin’ life was shit because of me. Because I stopped lookin’ for them. I live with that guilt eatin’ away at me every goddamn day. I know Ramirez’s guys are out there somewhere, but I need this man.”
I won’t beg him. I won’t listen to him either. He doesn’t understand that this could be the last chance I have to take my son out and be a real father to him. That thought alone makes my head spin, but at the end of the day I need him to know that I love him and I want him. I need him to understand that. And I sure as hell want him to experience as much as he can before he has to go.
“Shit, I get it. I want you on the burner phone every hour. One fuckin’ hour passes without a call and I’m movin’ in. You got it?” I nod my head and Viking pulls his hand through his hair. “Fuckin’ bullshit,” he grumbles under his breath.
“Thanks brother. This means a lot to him, and it means even more to me. I don’t know how much time I have left with him,” I say.
Viking looks up with a look of understanding across his face. “You got time. The kid is like his dad. A tough son of a bitch. Now, get the fuck out of my office before I change my mind.” I grunt and turn to leave when he speaks again, “Watch your fuckin’ ass out there. I know you’ll be on a boat, but still.”
I flick two fingers in the air over my shoulder so that he knows that I heard him. I head into the main room and I can hear Drake making some strange noises. When I come around the corner I can see why. I lean against the wall and cross my arms as I watch the way my son interacts with the other guys.
“That is so cool!” Drake screams as Ink show him how he can move the bullet around under his skin. Why that motherfucker doesn’t just cut it out is beyond me. He’s kept it like that for almost a year now.
My eyes flicker to where Molly stands in the corner with Fin. He looks at her. Really looks at her. Something about that pisses me off and yet calms me at the same time. The way they interact with each other is different. It’s like they’re best friends, but there’s something more too. It’s the same way I used to look at her when we dated.
“He doesn’t mean anything by it,” Mason says coming to stand next to me.
“I know. I think it’s a good thing. When I’m gone she’ll need someone.”
“And you think that someone is Fin?”
“Look at them. You ever date a girl when you were younger man?” I ask looking over at them.
“Yeah.”
“How did you look at her?”
Mason looks up at me and then back at the two of them.
“Just like Fin is,” he says softly. “He won’t act on it. He respects you too much Reaper. You’re his brother.”
“I know Mason. I know he won’t but look at that connection. Look at his eyes. He’ll be there for her when she needs it the most and I can’t be pissed off at that.”
Admitting that out loud took some fucking guts. Fact is, I want to smash his fucking face in for having that connection with my woman, but I also know that when I’m not here she won’t have to be alone. She is stubborn as hell, but Fin knows his way around that stubbornness. I don’t for a second believe that either of them would betray me while I’m alive, but that means nothing later.
“You need to stop playin’ matchmaker. You’re alive motherfucker, or did you forget that part?” Mason slaps a hand across my chest which makes me laugh.
“Goddamn right I am. I’m not playin’ shit. I just call it how I see it.”
“Well, then your eyes are fucked. Go fishin’ before I tell Viking you’re still here and he chains your ass to a chair.”
I watch Mason walk away with a smirk on his face when her eyes catch mine. The slow, sexy smile on her face just melts me. She turns and slowly walks toward me with our eyes connected the whole way.
“Are you okay?” she asks when she’s finally in front of me.
I nod once and lean down to kiss her. “Perfect. You ready?” I whisper against her lips.
“Yeah. Drake’s excited.”
“I am too. I wanna spend some time with the two of you,” I tell her.
Pressing a kiss to her lips I pull away and look over to Drake.
“Hey Drake. You ready?” I holler at him.
His head pops up and I see a smile on his face. He’s fucking perfect.
“Yeah. Let’s go,” he yells climbing to his feet and running towards us.
This is it. My wife and my son. My family. My heart. This is everything.
Chapter 25
Molly
The boat tilts and sways and so does my stomach. I feel like I’m going to lose the lunch we ate before coming out here. I can’t believe I let him talk me into coming out on this boat.
“Hold your pole right here and throw it out like this,” Roland says.
He’s so animated. I love watching him with Drake. He’s showing and teaching him so many new things. It means the world to me. They both mean the world to me. Drake throws out his line just like his dad showed him.
“Good. That’s good,” Roland encourages him. “Now we wait until we get a bite.”
Roland moved around Drake and sits down next to me. He tosses his arm over my shoulder and pulls me against him.
“Not a fan of the boat?” he asks with a laugh.
“It’s not that bad now. When you drive I want to lose it though.”
He laughs and tugs me closer.
“This is nice, yeah? Just the three of us.”
I glance up at him, smile, and say, “It’s the best. Thank you for doing this.”
“Never thank me for bein’ with my family. This is all I’ve ever wanted Mols. You know that.”
His words are sincere which only drives yet another stake through my chest. It hurts to know that he’s missed so much time with Drake. I understand now that my actions caused this. I can handle the pain of it eating away at me, but he shouldn’t have to.
“Whatever you’re thinkin’ stop it,” he warns me.
“Dad, I got one!”
Drake’s yell breaks our silence. Roland jumps up from his seat and rushes as fast of he can next to his son. He helps hold the pole with Drake as they reel in what he caught.
“It’s a good one son.
You can keep that one. We’ll get your mom to cook it up later,” Roland says while smirking at me over his shoulder.
I laugh and shake my head as I watch the two of them working together. Roland gets the fish off of the hook and tosses it into a bucket before helping Drake again. The look of pure happiness can be seen on both of their faces. When Roland finally comes back to my side I’m nearly in tears.
“Why the tears?” he asks as he wipes my cheeks.
“I’m going to miss this,” I barely choke the words out before Roland huffs. I glance over and see the anger in his eyes.
“You keep sayin’ that like you’re just sittin’ here waitin’ on him to be gone. I’m fuckin’ tired of it Molly. He’s my son and I have to hope for the best even if you’re not,” he snaps while keeping his voice low so that Drake can’t hear him.
“I am preparing myself. I don’t know how this shit works Roland. I’m sorry if it pisses you off that this is how I deal with it,” I snap back at him.
I start to move when he grabs my arms. I look back at him and he’s livid.
“This is how you deal? By bringin’ it up and ruinin’ all the good moments we have left? You had your time with him Molly. Even if it was a shitty situation you still had him there. Don’t you dare fuck up what time I have with him.”
With that he moves to stand and heads back over to Drake. I let the tears fall as I let what he said settle over me. I never meant it that way. My time with Drake has been precious and I do feel horrible that Roland didn’t get to spend those years with us.
I lean back and watch as the two most important people in my life smile and share this time together. My phone pings in my pocket. I silently thank whoever it is that they broke the tension I was feeling. Sliding my phone out I click on the message icon. Sliding my finger across the screen I suck in a breath.
Unknown: How comfortable you look with him. Such a shame it won’t last long.
My heart races. How did he get this number? Fin set this phone up when Roland went to prison. No one but Fin, Roland, and Viking have this number. My eyes jerk around, but all I see is water. We’re out here far enough from land that we can’t be seen. How does he know I’m with him? Does he just assume?