“The way I see it, I have to,” she said, winking as she climbed out of his truck. “Who’s going to keep all those pretty girls away from you?”
Chapter Twelve
Claudia had only been back in her room a few minutes when her mother called. “Hey, Mom. What’s up?”
“You sound better.”
And she had Brady to thank for it. “What can I say? It was a good day.”
“Then I hope I won’t ruin it by asking what I’m about to ask you.”
Claudia sank down on her bed, propping her head against the headboard using two fluffy pillows. “I’m not sure I like the sound of this. What is it?”
Her mother sighed as though she was working up her courage. “Some of the ladies thought it would be a nice idea to memorialize Trevor and the kids on the anniversary of the accident. You know, a little get-together in the town square: candles, releasing balloons, inviting people to say a few words, share a favorite memory.”
The anniversary of the accident was less than two weeks away. How could she be expected to go back in twelve short days and face everyone she knew and loved? “I’m not so sure, Mom.”
“Please, baby. I know it won’t be easy, but everyone’s still grieving. We all miss Trev and those babies. We always will. This is a chance for all of us to get together and share that, but we can’t imagine doing it without you.”
“I love that they want to do that, but…” How could she tell the grandmother of her children that for the first time in nearly a year, she could take a breath without feeling as though her chest would crack wide open? “I’m finally starting to feel a little bit better, and that’s because… well, I’ve met someone.”
She hadn’t intended to tell her family about Brady so soon, but she wasn’t sure she could avoid it now. If she went back to Brockville, she wanted to do it with him. She held her breath, waiting for a lecture about being careful because of all the crazies out there.
“Really? Oh, honey, that’s wonderful. Tell me all about him!”
“You don’t think it’s too soon?” Claudia whispered, wondering if the whole town would think that when they saw her with another man.
“Of course not! Trev loved you. He would have wanted you to be happy.”
“Well, his name is Brady. And he owns the inn where I’m working as a waitress this summer.”
“Really? He’s your age?”
“Give or take a few years.”
“Perfect. Ever been engaged? Married? Any kids?”
She couldn’t believe her mother thought she’d be strong enough to date a single dad. “No, no, and no.”
“Hmm.”
“I know what that means. You don’t approve?”
“Oh no, honey, it’s not that. It’s just, a guy that age who’s presumably successful and never been in a committed relationship… maybe there’s a reason. Could it be he’s just looking for a good time? A summer fling, perhaps?”
Claudia’s eyes drifted to the flowers he’d given her. “He wants a commitment. I’m just not sure I can give it to him.”
“Does he know everything?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, good. Then at least he’ll be patient with you. Surely he understands that it’s going to take you some time to get over what happened.”
“I’m never going to get over it. I’m just trying to find a way to live with it.”
“I know, sweetheart. That’s what I meant.”
Claudia tried to remind herself that her mother had been through just as much as she had, watching her daughter’s heart breaking at the same time she lost her son-in-law and both grandbabies.
“I’m just scared, I guess. I’m not sure if I can give Brady what he needs. Ever.”
“What do you mean?”
“I know I’m getting way ahead of myself here. We’ve only been dating for, like, a minute, but if things do get more serious and he wants more—”
“Like marriage and a family?”
“Yeah.” Her eyes filled with tears as she stared at the painting above the TV, a painting of the sun setting over the inn’s lake. “How could I even think about doing that again?”
“You’re strong and resilient, Claudia. I know it may not feel that way now, but you are. I know how much you loved being a mama. Those babies were your life. How can you not want that again?”
“I’m sorry, I can’t talk about this now.” After the day she’d had of trying to sort out her feelings for Brady, this was just too much. “Can I let you know about the memorial?”
“Of course, sweetheart. But I do hope you’ll come. And bring Brady. We’d all love to meet him.”
“Bye, Mom. Love you.”
“Love you too, honey.”
Claudia glanced at the clock, imagining Brady parked in front of his large flat screen, watching the game. She wished she was with him, curled up in his arms as they cheered on their favorite team.
As she got up to wander out to her patio, she wondered what it would be like to live here, with him, to call this place home.
“Oh hi, Claudia,” Helen said, waving when she spotted her. “I was just taking Muffin out to do her duty.”
Claudia smiled at the adorable Yorkie with a cone that looked bigger than she was. “The poor girl.”
“I know.” Helen pouted comically. “She’s feeling better I think, but we’re both counting down the hours ‘til she can take it off.” She pointed toward their massive RV, which Brady had invited them to park in his lot. “Ray’s lying down. Mind if I join you?”
“No, some company would be nice.” It would help to get an objective opinion, which her mother wasn’t capable of giving. If they found out that Brady lived only one hour from Brockville, her parents would push Claudia that much harder to give a relationship with him a chance.
“Wonderful. Just let me take Muffin inside and I’ll be right back.”
While Helen was in the RV, Claudia took the time to slip inside and put on a pair of jeans and a long-sleeved T-shirt, to protect her from both bugs and the nip in the air. Though it was July, it was an unseasonably cool night with the threat of rain hovering.
By the time she returned, Helen was settling in on one of two chairs.
They sat in companionable silence for a few minutes, enjoying the beautiful sunset over the water, before Claudia said softly, “Brady told me you know about the accident.”
“Oh, dear,” Helen said, looking alarmed. “I hope you don’t think we’re horrible people for sticking our noses in where they don’t belong.”
Since Claudia had grown up in a small town, she knew that was par for the course. “I understand. You were just looking out for Brady, right?”
“And you,” Helen said, looking troubled. “It was obvious you were going through something. We wanted to help if we could. We thought if we learned what happened, we’d be able to advise Brady on how to be more sensitive.”
“I’m not upset you felt compelled to do a little digging.” Claudia reached for Helen’s hand when she still looked uncertain. “Honest, I’m not.”
“Thank goodness,” she said, exhaling as she leaned back, splaying her other hand over her chest. “Now that we’ve got that out of the way, tell me, did you and Brady have a nice day? Dana said he took you into town?”
“It was lovely.” She rested her heels against the edge of the footstool, bending her legs. “Landon is such a pretty town. A lot like Brockville, in fact, but more scenic, with all the lakes and waterfalls.”
“We love it here,” Helen said with a contented sigh. “It was so hard for us to leave, but we had to if we were ever going to see more of the country.”
“Then you’ve never regretted selling Brady the inn?”
“Heavens, no. It was time to pass the torch. When we see the things Brady has done with this place in the short time he’s owned it, we know we made the right decision.”
“So you travel around in the RV all year?”
“For now.” Helen smiled
. “But we are planning to buy a little house here when we feel we need to put down more permanent roots. We figure we should be able to see most of what we want to see in the next year or two. When we sold the place to Brady, we bought a condo in Florida, then we moved to Arizona for a while. Eventually, we sold that condo and bought the RV so we could travel more. But Landon is and always will be home.”
Claudia thought of the life Helen described. Having someone to share her golden years with, traveling and seeing the world instead of lamenting over an empty nest, seemed like a pretty great way to spend one’s retirement.
“I’m sure Brady would be thrilled if you moved back. I know how much you and Ray mean to him.”
Helen’s smile was tender and affectionate when she said, “And we love that boy like our son. Which is why I feel compelled to ask, can you see yourself staying on here with Brady?”
“I’ve just been asking myself that same question,” Claudia admitted.
“And?”
“It’s beautiful here.” She inhaled deeply, appreciating the crisp, fresh country air. “The people are so warm and friendly. And small town life is definitely for me. I couldn’t imagine living in a big city.”
“But you’re a teacher, not a waitress, right?”
“I loved teaching,” Claudia said, thinking about the kids who’d passed through her classroom, taking a little piece of her heart when they moved on to the next grade. “But it was just too hard for me to go on doing it after the accident. I tried. I took some time off, but I managed to finish up the last few months of the school year. But I realized that I needed some time to heal before I could decide whether I was really strong enough to go back to it.”
“I don’t know if Brady told you, but my friend Vera teaches first grade at the local elementary school. She’s going to be retiring the year after next, which means there will be a job opening, should you decide to stay on here. I’d be happy to ask Vera to put in a good word for you when the time comes.”
Another year to distance herself from the pain may be just what she needed. Claudia knew schools liked to make their hiring decisions months in advance, but that would still give her plenty of time to decide whether Landon was going to be her permanent home.
“Thanks, I’ll think about it and let you know.”
“It sure is a nice night, isn’t it?” Helen asked. “Not too hot or humid, just the way I like it.”
“I agree.” Claudia glanced at Helen. “Do you and Ray ever miss the inn?”
“All the time. That’s why we come back to visit.”
Claudia could understand why. Even though she’d only been there a short time, it was already hard for her to imagine leaving. “Can I ask your advice about something?”
She laughed, her eyes crinkling with amusement. “Honey, you can ask anyone who knows me—doling out advice is my very favorite thing to do.”
Since Helen knew better than most how to live with grief, Claudia said, “My mom just called and told me they want to have a little memorial for my husband and kids in Brockville on the anniversary of the accident. She wants me to come.”
“I see. And how do you feel about that?”
“I’m torn. I’m expecting that day to be difficult.” Not that every other day was any easier. “Maybe having people around me who knew and loved Trev and the kids would make it a bit easier. Commemorating their lives in that way would be nice.”
“Then you should go.” Helen clasped Claudia’s forearm. “Sharing your grief with people who understand is one of the best things you can do for yourself.”
“Brady told me about the support group at the church. I think I’d like to go.”
“That’s wonderful,” Helen said, her eyes lighting up. “I like to attend whenever I’m in town. I know they have a meeting on Wednesday night. Maybe we could go together?”
“That sounds great, thanks.”
They sat in comfortable silence, listening to the light breeze blowing through the trees surrounding them, the lap of waves grazing the sandy beach, and the chorus of frogs and crickets.
“Do you think Brady would come with me?”
Helen tipped her head to look at Claudia. “Where?”
“Back to Brockville for the memorial. Would it be weird to ask him, do you think?”
“Why would it be weird?”
“I think he’s having a bit of a hard time figuring out how to support me without having the occasional bout of jealousy over what I shared with my husband.”
“That’s only natural, don’t you think?” Helen asked. “He has feelings for you. He knows you were deeply in love with a man you’d still be with if he hadn’t been taken from you. He has to wonder if you’ll ever be able to love him the way you loved your late husband.”
“The way I feel about Brady is different,” Claudia said quietly, as though she was sharing a secret that someone from the great beyond might hear.
“How so?”
She battled with her guilt as she admitted, “I find myself thinking that Brady does things I wished Trevor had done.”
“Like what?”
“Talking openly and honestly about his feelings instead of walking away, for one.”
“Ah, yes. That’s a big one. Ray and I had to learn how to do that. We were really young when we got married and didn’t know anything about communication. Whenever we got in a fight, he’d peel out of here in his truck, and I wouldn’t see him for hours.”
“My husband was like that,” she said, feeling an ache in her chest for complaining. She loved Trevor, but he had been far from perfect. And he’d loved her in spite of the fact she wasn’t perfect. “But Brady isn’t. In fact, he seems to prefer talking things out, even when I don’t feel I’m ready. If anything, I feel like I’m the one walking away, and he’s the one begging me to stay and hash it out. It’s kind of a weird role reversal for me.”
“Take it from someone who’s been married over forty years—communication is the one thing you can’t live without if you expect a marriage to survive. We’ve gone without a lot—food, shelter, money—but you soon learn that you can get through just about anything if you have a partner you can rely on.”
“I do feel I can count on Brady.” He made her feel safe and secure, as though he’d do his best to make sure nothing bad happened to her. “And that’s a good feeling.”
“Do you think he feels he can count on you?”
Claudia’s stomach pitched when she realized she’d never given him reason to believe he could. If anything, she’d been sending out warning signals, suggesting he’d be a fool to count on her.
“No, I don’t.”
“Oh.”
Helen wasn’t judging her, but Claudia was definitely judging herself as she stood. “I’m sorry, Helen. Would you excuse me? I need to have a word with Brady.”
“By all means, sweetheart.” She winked. “Give him my love.”
“I will.” And perhaps mine too.
Brady cursed when the opposing team scored two runs on an outfielder error that rebounded off the fence. Then someone knocked on his door, so he grabbed the remote and paused the game. Guessing it was one of his employees who needed to leave early because they weren’t feeling well or had a family emergency, he jogged to the door.
“Hey,” he said, surprised to find Claudia on his porch. “Is everything okay?”
She opened her arms for him. “I’m sorry to bother you. I just needed to see you.”
He picked her up and held her tight. “You could never bother me. Get in here.” He led her inside, kicking the door shut.
She kissed him briefly before pulling away. “I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
She glanced over her shoulder at the game, grimacing when she saw their team was down two runs. “Can we talk for a minute? Then I promise I’ll let you get back to the game.”
“Forget the game.” Taking her hand, he led her into the great room. “If you want to talk, I want to listen. Wha
t’s up?”
She smiled. “Have I told you lately how amazing I think you are?”
“You may have,” he said, grinning. “But I’m not opposed to hearing it again.” He sat on the couch, pulling her into his lap. “Okay, so tell me what’s on your mind, beautiful.” He nuzzled her neck, smiling when he heard her sharp intake of breath as his lips grazed her smooth skin.
“I want you to know you can count on me, Brady.”
Sensing she was telling him something significant, he pulled back, looking her in the eye. “Okay.”
“I’m serious. Ever since I got here, you’ve been there for me at every turn, and tonight, talking to Helen, I realized that I’ve come to count on you.”
“I’m glad,” he said, wrapping his hands around her waist. “I want you to know you can count on me. Anytime for anything.” He didn’t make promises like that lightly, and he hoped Claudia realized that.
“I do know that.” She wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him close. “And you can count on me too. I’m not going anywhere. I don’t want to go anywhere. And if you need or want anything from me, all you have to do is ask.”
“Anything?” he asked, smirking.
She giggled, slapping his shoulder. “I’m serious.”
“I know you are.” He locked eyes with her, trying to let her know how much her offer meant to him. “Thank you.”
“My pleasure.” She bit her lip, looking uncertain. “Um, there’s something else I need to talk to you about.”
He knew talking was the most important thing when it came to building a lasting relationship with a woman like Claudia, so he said, “Shoot.”
“My mom called to tell me they’re having a memorial tribute for Trev and the kids the weekend after next in Brockville. She wants me to come… and bring you. What do you think?”
“You told your mom about me?” Brady couldn’t hide his shock. Given what she’d been through, he’d expected it to be a long time before she was ready to tell her family about the new man in her life.
“Yeah. Is that okay?”
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