“It’s better than okay. I’m flattered.”
“So how do you feel about coming to Brockville with me? Would that be weird for you, hearing people pay tribute to my ex?”
“Of course not. Why would you think that? I already know he was a great guy. How could he not have been? He had you as a wife, didn’t he?”
She rewarded him with a watery smile before she whispered, “Brady, I have a confession to make.”
“What’s that?” he asked, feeling his heart rate kick up a notch.
“I think I’m falling in love with you.”
It took him a second to process her words before a smile split his face. “Glad you finally caught up. I’ve known for a while that I’m in love with you.” He pulled her close, whispering in her ear, “And it would be an honor for me to stand by your side while we celebrate the people you loved most.”
Chapter Thirteen
Claudia was nervous about her first support group meeting with Helen, but she knew it was something she should have done a long time ago. So when they pulled into the parking lot of the church and Helen asked her if she was okay, she forced a smile. “No, but I’m sure I will be.”
“That’s the spirit,” Helen said, smiling. “I know how you feel. I remember how I felt walking in here for the first time. My teeth were chattering, I was so nervous. I knew almost everyone, but the scary part was putting a voice to my feelings for the first time.”
“Yeah.”
Claudia had made a habit of shutting down when people wanted to talk to her about Trevor or the kids. It was just too painful. She feared she’d break down and embarrass herself or make the other person feel guilty for bringing it up. But a support group was a safe zone where it was okay to be real about her feelings, to acknowledge her loss and be emotional. That was exactly what she needed now.
Helen greeted a few people, introducing Claudia as her friend who was living at the inn for the summer, helping Brady during peak season. It made Claudia question what would happen after peak season. Would she still be there? Would he still want her? Or would she be strong enough, after a couple of months of these meetings, to return to Brockville and the teaching job she’d loved?
She put her concerns out of her mind as she listened to group members share their stories. Some had lost loved ones to long illnesses, others in freak accidents. They were all dealing with the death of a partner, child, or parent, with the exception of one lady who’d lost her best friend. According to her, the woman was more of a sister, and her death had left her feeling lost and alone.
When it was Claudia’s turn to speak, Helen reached for her hand, offering a nod of encouragement as she tried to collect herself.
“I lost my husband, son, and daughter in a car crash almost a year ago.”
There was a collective gasp as everyone tried to process her loss.
“I didn’t know how to cope with it, so I guess I kind of shut down emotionally.” She squeezed Helen’s hand as she felt a rush of tears building.
The group leader, a friendly woman in her late fifties who’d recently lost her husband of thirty years to a stroke, asked, “Did you have a lot of support, Claudia?”
“I had my family… my parents and grandparents. We’re very close. And my friends and coworkers tried to be there for me. But I couldn’t share my pain with anyone. It was too... big. I was afraid if I talked about it publicly, I’d never stop crying. So I waited until I was alone to break down. It felt safer that way.”
Others nodded their understanding, and for the first time, Claudia knew she was among people who truly understood what she’d been through. They may not have lost as much as she did, but their grief was as real as hers, and they’d had to take the same steps to move through their anguish. She could learn a lot from them.
“Eventually, I realized I needed some time away from everyone and everything that reminded me of the accident.” Claudia drew a shaky breath. “Living in that house, walking by their rooms every day…” She shook her head. “I couldn’t keep doing that to myself.”
The group leader gestured to others in the group. “A lot of us, myself included, decided to sell the houses we shared with our spouses. We took our memories with us, of course, but in many ways, we had to get a clean slate to start living again.”
A clean slate. That was what Landon had given her. A place to make new memories.
“So that’s when I came here.” A slight smile graced her lips. “It was purely by accident actually. My car broke down near Brady’s inn, and he took me in.” She thought about the next words before she said them, realizing how true they were. “He gave me a home.”
Others smiled, obviously pleased that she’d found a safe haven among them.
“Now I’m faced with another challenge,” she said, hoping the group could offer some advice. “My friends and family want to have a little service on the anniversary of the accident, to pay tribute to Trevor and the kids. And I’m not going to lie, I’m kind of scared. I feel like I’m finally back on solid ground, and I wonder if going back home will cause a setback.”
“It might,” the leader acknowledged. “My husband and I had a little cabin that he loved. We bought it the year after we were married.” She smiled. “He used to love going there, hunting and fishing. He said it was his favorite place on Earth.”
Claudia could think of several places in Brockville that would always be inextricably linked to her family, places she’d be afraid to visit in case the memories assaulted her. The park where she’d push her babies on the swings or the high school where she’d first met Trevor. Their hometown was filled with places like that, the squares that made up the fabric of their lives together.
“Eventually, I had to decide what to do with it,” the leader, Ann, said. “I felt selling it would be like selling a part of our history, but I was afraid to go up there. I thought it would be too painful.”
“What did you do?” Claudia asked quietly.
“Eventually, I went up.” Her smile grew as she made eye contact with Claudia. “And I’m so glad I did. I feel like he’s always with me there. I spread his ashes in the water, and sometimes I sit on the back porch and talk to him, just like I used to.”
This brave woman had faced her fears, and it had made her stronger and ultimately happier. Claudia had to be willing to do the same.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Dana asked, frowning at Brady, who was riffling through the desk drawers looking for his “lucky” pen.
“I’m fine,” he snapped. “Ugh! Where is it? I know I was using it out here earlier. Are you sure you haven’t seen it?”
Dana touched his arm, her expression sympathetic. “Honey, this isn’t about some stupid pen. You’re worried about Claudia, aren’t you?”
When Claudia had shared her story with Dana earlier that day, she claimed it was getting easier for her to tell her new friends about what had happened to her family. Brady loved that she was beginning to consider his family and friends her own.
He sank back against the wall, sliding to his butt on the floor. “What if going to that meeting was a bad idea, Dana? She could come back a wreck, feeling even worse than she did before.”
“Or she could come back having taken another step on the road to recovery.” She leaned forward, resting her hand on his forearm. “You did the right thing encouraging her to go, honey. She needs to talk about what happened. It’s not healthy to keep it all bottled up inside like that. Besides, she has Helen with her. You know she’ll take good care of her.”
“Yeah, I know.” He pressed his thumb and forefinger into his eyes. “She asked me to go back to Brockville with her. They’re having a ceremony for her husband and kids, and her parents thought she should be there.”
“They’re probably right. And I’m glad you’re going with her. She shouldn’t have to face something like that alone.”
“She wouldn’t have been alone,” Brady argued. “She’d have her parents and grandparents, her friends and former cowor
kers there. She’ll be surrounded by people who love her, who knew and loved her family.”
Dana’s eyes narrowed as she sat back, crossing her arms. “Are you saying you don’t want to go with her?”
“I’m saying I’m scared.” Brady had said and thought that several times since he met Claudia, whereas before he met her, nothing much had scared him. “What if her family and friends convince her it’s too soon for her to get involved with someone else? What if they don’t like me or don’t trust me? Maybe they’ll think I’m trying to take advantage of her because she’s vulnerable.”
“That is possible, I suppose,” Dana said, nodding. “Or maybe they’ll see what I see when I look at you two together. Two people in love. A man who has helped the woman who means everything to him try to get her life back so she can eventually find happiness again—with him.”
Brady shouldn’t be surprised by Dana’s insight—she seemed to know everything—but he had to ask, “How did you know I was in love with her?”
She grinned. “Honey, it’s as plain as the nose on that handsome face of yours. I’ve known you a long, long time, and I’ve never seen you look at a girl like that.”
Brady sighed. “I do love her.”
“Have you told her?”
“Yeah.”
“Good.”
He sighed. “She says she feels the same way...”
“But?”
“I can’t help but wonder if she’s in the right place, mentally and emotionally, to make that kind of decision. She’s been through so much. Maybe I threw her a lifeline, a chance at happiness, and she’s clinging to it because it’s the only thing helping her get through the day right now.”
Dana eyed him carefully. “It’s also possible that she’s suffered so much that the man upstairs decided to help her find her way again. That’s why he brought you into her life: to guide her, love her, support her. You think you can do that?”
Brady had never really tried putting another person’s needs above his own, but with Claudia, it wouldn’t be a hardship. He’d do anything for her. “Yeah, I can.”
“Good.” Dana stood. “Then you should be just fine, whatever happens.”
Brady jumped up when Claudia walked in. He hadn’t realized how uneasy he was until he searched her face, looking for some sign that she was okay.
“Hey, babe,” he said, walking around the desk to hug her. “How was the meeting?”
She rolled forward on her toes, holding him tight. “It was cathartic.”
He could feel the relief in her body, as though the weight of the world had been lifted from her shoulders. “Then you’re going back?”
“Every week,” she said proudly.
“I’m glad.” He pulled back, holding her face as he kissed her forehead. “Have I told you how proud I am of you for doing this?”
“Thanks.” She peeked at Dana over his shoulder, blushing slightly when she said to Brady, “I was hoping we could go back to your place? I think there’s a ball game on in a bit.”
“Yeah, of course.” He wrapped an arm around her, tucking her into his side as he kissed the top of her head. “Dana, I’m done for the night, but I have my cell phone on if you need me.”
“Don’t worry about a thing,” Dana said, waving him off. “I can handle anything that comes up. You two just enjoy your evening.”
“Did I tell you I sold my car?” Claudia asked as they passed through the front door on their way back to his house. “Since I’d already decided it wasn’t worth fixing, I asked your mechanic friend to have a look at it to see if he might want to buy it for parts or whatever. He said he’d give me a thousand bucks for it.”
“That’s great. How’s the truck working out for you?”
“I love it.” She tipped her head back, smiling at him. “Thank you again for that. It was incredibly generous.”
“My pleasure.” There was nothing he wouldn’t do to make her light up like that.
As they walked into his house, she said, “So, um, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something.”
He could tell she was wary, which made his gut clench. Please don’t tell me you’re leaving. “Okay. What is it?”
“I got a large life insurance settlement when Trevor and the kids died.”
“You did?” He frowned. “Then why are you working here? And why were you driving that old car—”
“I didn’t want to spend the money. It didn’t feel right. But I know it’s crazy to have it sitting in some bank account when it could be doing some good.”
“So what did you have in mind?”
“Well, they’re still trying to raise money for the library at the elementary school, right? Shay said it burned down and they’ve been trying to raise the funds to rebuild it, since it’s not in the municipal budget and the insurance wouldn’t cover it because—”
“Yeah, I know the story. But what does that have to do with…” Brady gripped her shoulders as he looked her in the eye. “You can’t seriously be thinking about donating your money to the school?”
She shrugged, looking uncomfortable. “I’m a teacher, Brady. Who knows better than I do how much kids need books? Besides, my kids used to love it when I read them bedtime stories. It was always our favorite time of day. What better way to honor their memory?”
“I love you,” Brady whispered, pulling her hard against his chest. “You are so incredible.”
“Then you think it’s a good idea?”
“I think it’s an amazing idea, if you’re sure you won’t need the money?”
“I won’t.” She shook her head emphatically. “I don’t need much to get by. I can’t go on living here forever, but when it’s time for me to move, I can get a little apartment, and if I decide to go back to teaching, I’ll have no problem living off my salary.”
Brady knew he couldn’t expect her to go on living and waitressing at the inn forever, but he loved spending every day with her, knowing he could catch a glimpse of her whenever he needed a pick-me-up. Just because she was considering a move into town eventually didn’t mean they couldn’t go on dating, did it?
“Tell me what you’re thinking,” she said, patting his chest. “And don’t say nothing. I know you better than that.”
“It just, uh, sounds like you’ve been thinking a lot about what your life will look like if you decide to stay in Landon. The teaching job, the apartment in town. Any chance you see a boyfriend in that plan?”
Her lips twitched before she threaded her hand through his, leading them back to his place. “You honestly think I’d consider staying on here if I didn’t see you as a part of my life?”
He knew this was all happening fast, and he didn’t want to take anything for granted. “I want you to do whatever feels right.” He kissed the back of her hand, his fingers still linked with hers. “Whether that means staying on here or moving into town and taking a teaching job, I’ll support you.”
He didn’t want to give her any more to think about, especially since her mind must already be swimming with possibilities, but biting his tongue had never been his go-to response when something was on his mind.
“So Dana’s been thinking about retiring for a while now.”
“She has?” Claudia looked up at him, taking his breath away with a natural beauty he’d never expected to find in a woman with a heart as honest and pure as hers. “What would you do without her? Isn’t she pretty much your right hand around here?”
“You can say that again.” He bit his lip, wondering if he was going out on a limb when he should be clinging to safety instead. “I guess I’ll have to look for someone to replace her. It won’t be easy, since she knows this place so well and doesn’t really have a true job description. She does a little bit of everything, whatever’s needed, but basically she helps me run the place.”
“Like a manager then?”
“Yeah, but more than that. She’s filled in for waitresses, housekeepers, heck, even the cook a time or two when I
was in a real fix.”
“Sounds like you need a Jack or Jill of all trades to replace her,” Claudia said, climbing the three steps leading to his front porch.
“And someone I can trust.” He never would have guessed he could learn to trust someone in the short time he’d known Claudia, but he had. “I guess I need a partner.”
He held his breath as she stopped in her tracks before turning to face him. “A partner? You’re thinking of selling part of the inn? But you’re working so hard to pay it off. Why would you do that?”
“No, not a financial partner,” he said, shaking his head. “I guess I was hoping to find someone who loves this place as much as I do, who’s as invested in it as I am.” He glanced at the RV still parked in his lot. “I always imagined running this place with my wife, the way Ray and Helen did.”
“Oh.” She stepped back, gripping the wood railing behind her.
“Are you okay?” he asked, reaching out to steady her when it looked as if she might stumble.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just…” She rubbed her temple. “Um, do you think I could get a glass of water? It just occurred to me I haven’t had much to drink today. With this heat, I must be getting a little dehydrated.”
“Yeah, sure. Come on in.” Brady knew she was trying to avoid his suggestion, which told him she wasn’t ready to talk about what their future might look like. She only wanted to consider what her future might look like. And he couldn’t say he blamed her.
Chapter Fourteen
Brady offered to walk Claudia back to her room as soon as the ball game was over. That was when she knew for sure they were in trouble, but she had a plan to get them back on track.
When he tried to end their night with a brief kiss at her door, she pulled him inside. “Come in,” she whispered, gripping his black T-shirt in her fists. “I don’t want this tension between us.”
She could tell he was torn when he flattened his palm on the wall beside her head.
“I don’t want that either. I’m just…”
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