by Anna White
“Alfie needs your help peeling the potatoes? He’s nearly had his fingers off like 100 times in the last half an hour.” She chuckled a little as did I. That sentence there summed Alfie up.
“Okay I’ll be down. Give me 10 minutes?” She nodded and I smiled widely. “What time are we doing gifts? After dinner?” She simply nodded before she left me alone in the bathroom. Goosebumped appeared on my skin as I rubbed myself dry. I made my way down the hallway towards my old room when I was pulled into Harry’s room. A small squeal escaped my mouth and I held on to my towel tighter.
“Avoiding me again?” His words were teasing and I folded my arms. I didn't make eye contact with him. I was still annoyed that he’d been out all night on Christmas eve. “Avaya?” He ran his fingers underneath my chin, the feeling of his skin against mine made me sigh.
“If you don’t know why I’m pissed off is there any point in explaining?” I muttered more to myself than to him. I closed my eyes as a million questions ran through my head. Who was he with? What was he doing? I heard him groan a little and my eyes darted open.
“If it’s about being out all day yesterday, you really don’t want to know why I was out or what I was doing.” He loosed his grip on me and planted a kiss on my forehead. I frowned deeply at him and watched as his shoulders slumped. “And I’m guessing that isn’t what you wanted to hear?” I shook my head and frowned at him as I looked at his big blue puppy dog eyes.
“No. It’s not the answer I wanted. Well done genius.” He smirked as he stepped back and covered his chest with his hands.
“Ouch. That hurt.” I suppressed a small laugh and pushed his shoulder softly.
“Spill Haz.” He shrugged and I leaned against the wall as he paced the room.
“I just did something for Rava. It’s nothing major, I swear it just took some time?” I nodded and took my seat next to him. Since when did I let things go so easily? I could hear Alfie calling my name and moaned inwardly.
“You could have just text me?” He shrugged and nodded as I stood up. “I worried?” It was the truth. I didn’t sleep great because I had no idea what he was doing. I began to throw on some clothes so that I could leave the room to go and help Alfie.
“I know. I’m sorry.” The look on his face was sad and my heart skipped. I now felt awful for doubting what he was doing, even though his previous reputation gave me more than enough excuse to do so.
My fingers were nowhere near as bad as Alfie’s by the time I put potatoes on, turned the turkey down and set the table. People were starting to arrive. Juve was now walking around looking like his bubbly self, he was teasing everyone even his mother. Which made me laugh more than it should have. I made myself look slightly more presentable. I placed my hair down over my shoulders, pulled my jeans up around my waist and placed on my Christmas jumper before I answered the door to my mum. She was stood in the huge hallways rather awkwardly; Jay was trying to make her feel more at ease along with Juve. I smirked to myself as she looked at Juve like she loved him. I chuckled slightly as I wrapped my arms around her softly.
“Oh hello!” She jumped slightly and returned my hug.
“I see you’ve met Harry’s brother Juve?” She nodded before she blushed a little. “Let me introduce you to the rest of them?” Her eyes were prised away from the lads and they widened.
“There’s more of them?” She whispered and I nodded. Jay winked in my direction and I shook my head as she followed me into the livingroom. They were all seated on the sofa’s. I gestured at them and his sisters and smiled up at my mum.
“Oh don’t you look like your mother?” Harry’s father stood from his seat and offered her his seat next to Harry’s mother.
“Thank you?” She was now perched on the edge of the sofa as I began to introduce her to everyone.
The conversation seemed to flow easily and even his mother seemed to relax as she chatted away with my mum.
“So what do you do?” I rolled my eyes at her question and glanced at Haz who stood leaning against the doorframe. His eyes were smiling.
“I work for a law firm. Just a PA.” My mum’s response to her question made me quiver. Oh you’re so much more than just someone’s PA… I could feel my heart skip a beat as his mother opened her mouth.
“I was Henry’s PA. Many moons ago.” They shared a sweet look, infact the most genuine I’ve seen between the two of them and heard Chantel pretend to be sick. I laughed a little and was quickly joined by Harry who took his seat next to me on the floor.
“Your humour is really twisted.” He whispered in my ear and I couldn’t help but giggle. The funny thing was for this entire conversation I’d been picturing my mum falling head over heels for Mr. Conway himself. His stubble tickled my ear and his breath made my goosebumps appear.
“Hmm… Coming from you?” I smiled up at him as he kissed my ear slowly. His large arms draped over my shoulders as he wrapped them around my neck softly.
“Aww look at how loved up Haz is!” Amiee was gushing at her father and he looked at us both. Suddenly the grip Harry had on me loosened and I glanced at his father’s torn expression.
“I wish he’d have met you years ago sweetheart.” He was smiling at Haz and I sensed the awkward atmosphere. What happened? Why does he wish this?
“You’re good for him.” His mother sniggered and I frowned at her. God she’s such a witch, yet I kind of feel smug that I’d actually received a compliment off her. We sat like this for a while, his big arms cuddling me in front of the fire. Conversation was dying down a little and I could smell burning before I heard Alfie start to curse. I giggled and stood up.
“I think dinner is ready?” I spurted out and they all laughed. Both Alfie and I made an effort to save the cremated roasters and plated up the rest of the dinner, Jay rounded everyone up in the dining room and dinner was served. It smelt pretty good…
The conversation was steady while everyone filled their faces, memories are shared by Amiee and Chantel which were quite cute. Buddy was the brunt of many of the jokes but I couldn’t help but notice that nobody really had any memories of Haz. I was dying to know what happened and why he wasn’t around, why did he move? I glanced across at him messing with the bracelet on his arm, he had been quiet and I raised my eyebrows at him. He simply smiled a weak smile as he stood to clear around the table. I knew that it was half arsed and an attempt to stop me from asking questions he didn’t want to answer. I went to stand and my mum’s voice suddenly brought me back into some sort of reality.
“Didn’t you?” Her hazel eyes were shiny and I nodded in agreement with whatever she had just been saying. They all laughed and I made my way out of the kitchen. I joined Haz in the hallway, he picked me up and smiled as he placed my back against the cool white wall.
“What’s wrong?” I placed my hand on his shoulder and he smiled at me, flashing his pearly whites. He moved my hair from my face and pushed it off my shoulder.
“Nothing? I want to give you your gift?” I shook my head and laughed.
“Not again? You’ve brought me enough Haz?” I frowned before he kissed my lips softly.
“Well to be honest I kinda wanna see what you’ve brought me?” A tiny girly giggle left his mouth, as he placed me on the floor and jogged towards the Christmas tree. I smiled and followed him towards the tree where he was standing rubbing his hands and laughing. I smirked and tried my hardest to fight through the mountains of presents. I grabbed the gift box and handed it to him. I blushed slightly as I did. I took my seat in the corner of the sofa and watched as he shook the box. I smiled at his childlike manner and watched as he started to open it.
“What is it?” His eyes were bright and I laughed before pushing his shoulder.
“Just open it?” He nodded and looked at me as he peeked into the box. I blushed and I couldn't sustain the suspense any longer. I watched as he looked deep in thought, analysing the picture and then smiled to himself before he opened his arms and offered his chest for me to
place my head.
“It’s lovely Av. Thank you.” I smiled and lifted the photo of us out of the box; it was the photo that was taken at my Birthday meal and it was one of my favourites. I smiled to myself as he dug deeper into the box and placed his hand on his new FitBit. He smirked and placed it on his wrist.
“What you trying to say?” I giggled and shrugged .
“I thought you’re forever at the gym and haven’t seen you with one and let’s face it you have everything else?” He sniggered and nudged me.
“Well it’s really nice thank you.” I smiled half-heartedly, knowing that it was nowhere near as much as what he could have brought me. I didn't want anything else from him, just him. He wrapped his arms around me and we sat cuddling for a while not saying much of anything. The rest of the family made their way to join us and started opening gifts while they got rather merry. I leant my head on his chest and felt him run his fingers over my hair and kissed it softly. I smiled to myself and glanced up at him from underneath my lashes. The look that was on his face made me nervous.
“I’ve got to give you your gift?” He was whispering as I frowned
“I don’t want anything.” I smirked as he frowned now, there was a little crease on his forehead that was deeper when he did this.
“Tough shit.” He placed his hand down the side of him towards his pocket and pulled out a little box. Almost instantly my heart begins to pound. Holy shit I hope it’s not an engagement ring... My expression must read scared and he simply smiled. As I took the box off him, my hands were almost shaking and I squinted inside. I smiled widely as I spotted a pair of earrings and a necklace placed inside. I clutched his hand softly and whispered.
“Thank you.” I pressed my head into his chest and felt him cuddle me. We sat in an embrace like this for the majority of the night. We enjoyed each others company.
Vens
I don't think I've ever felt so at ease with anybody else in my life before, though I knew it would be short lived and I wasn't entirely sure how I'd feel about him finding out. My face twisted as she looked up at me when our parents walked in through the door from the kitchen. Her mum was lovely, she joked and actually made my mother crack a smile. Buddy, Marley and Jamane were rather merry and started dancing around the living room with my youngest sister Aimee, she had grown so much over the last few years. Av started humming to a song that was playing through the tv speakers. She smiled at me and I moved her hair from her face.
“Jamane?” He turned to glance at her and nodded.
“Yes Av?” She sat upright and glanced across at Nancy.
“I know your group like hip hop but have they ever tried contemporary?” He grinned and shrugged.
“Probably some of them why?”
“I was thinking of teaching them some of my own choreography but it's not street.” He nodded eagerly and she glanced towards me. “It's a two man dance?” I suppressed a smile and her eyes wandered down towards my hands.
“You'd like me to learn it?” She nodded softly in my chest and I pulled her closer towards me. “Okay if you wish.” This seemed to ease her awkwardness a little and I heard a small laugh escape Jamanes lips.
“I just hope she can cope with girls swooning.” I smirked as the v appeared in between her eyes.
“I'm going to be fine.” She reassured him softly and relaxed back into the sofa. I overheard my father discussing business plans and I scooted slightly in my seat. I still haven't spoken to him about not being his lawyer. He glanced at me and everybody in the room seemed to be staring at me like I had something stuck to my forehead. Jay was moving awkwardly and looking at Av’s mother as she talked about strategy with him. They really seemed to like her. I frowned and stood to follow Jay into the kitchen where the smell of Christmas dinner lingered in the air. It was comforting.
“You didn't tell him then?” I shook my head and felt a wave of guilt flood me. His phone buzzed and as he answered it his face changed. I cringed to myself and glanced at Jay who was standing, shrugging. His ‘I told you to tell him before he found out through his PA’ look spoke louder than if he was to say anything at all. I huffed as my father frowned at me.
“When were you going to tell me your company weren’t going to have my back in this takeover?” I cleared my throat and nudged Jay's arm. He frowned and I grimaced a little. I sensed he could feel my pain.
“We can’t back you. Your competition is our client.” I glanced at Av who didn't really seem to be taking any notice, which eased me as I went to pour myself a coffee. If Av found out I worked for HJC I think she'd combust.
As I poured the hot coffee I felt small hands creep around my waist, I smiled to myself as she rested her head against my back and let out an almighty yawn. I turned to face her and cupped her head in my chest. I was on edge now, the feeling of wanting to jack up back but after holding her close to me it soon disappeared. Her skin turned a cool shade of pink and I smiled as she blushed. Seeing her face fill with blood even now made my heart pump a little faster.
“Your Dad isn’t happy is he?” I shook my head as she buried hers into my chest again. I huffed and she shrugged too.
“He never is sweetheart. You’ll learn to either love him or loathe him.” I heard her snigger and felt her squeeze me a little tighter. “I think you’ll be shocked when you see him lose his rag.” I let out a small giggle and felt her tense.
“I don’t think it could be worse than you?” She glanced up through her thick eyelashes and I grinned before I shrugged. She was right. Though she'd seen a side of me she had no idea how bad bad was. Half the people in that room didn't know what we’d done. What I was capable of doing. I flinched at the thought and I picked her up. She let out a small whimper and I grinned to myself. All I had to do was keep her here, keep her within arm's length, within touching distance and maybe she'd be safe.
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There’s blood all over the floor, she’s pale and barely breathing. I reach for her and hold the hole that’s so close to her tiny bump. Tears are beginning to stream from my eyes. Bandoni is standing over us laughing. I place my lips against her head and she reaches to touch my arm before breathing, “please keep yourself safe Harry.” I feel her grip loosen against my arm. I growl with frustration and squeeze her as pain shoots through my chest. How can she be ripped away from me now? How can she leave me now? She’s ripped from my arms with force as Rava pulls me away. Screaming out for her they do nothing. They stand like stone, emotionless and cold. I want to keep her safe I want to keep her warm and I can’t. They’ve ruined the one thing I had that was good. I’m now kicking and screaming as the overwhelming sadness begins to kick in.
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“Haz?” I couldn't open my eyes but I heard her voice calling my name. “Haz please wake up!?” The tone in her voice was full of worry and I snapped back into the world of reality. I was breathing heavily, sweat droplets were falling from my head and back as she cupped my face. Her bright green eyes were glazed over with tears and I touched her shoulder. “What’s wrong?” She questioned me and I had no answers, I couldn't tell her about my nightmares about what happened back then and what happened to her since. I grimaced. Her tiny fingers ran the length of my jaw and I wrapped an arm around her back, which pulled her on top of me. “You know this is the fifth time this week you’ve been screaming in your sleep?” Her frown appeared and I ran my fingers over her thighs as she placed her hand against my sweaty chest that was still going ten to the dozen.
“I don’t mean to scare you?” My voice wasn't as strong or sarcastic as I’d hoped and her frown seemed to deepen. I was now frowning and she shuffled under my glare.
“You’re not going to tell me are you?” I shake my head in an automatic response to her question.
“Av?” She stands and goes to exit towards the bathroom. I stand on my feet and reach for her hand. She stopped in her tracks and keet her face a
way from mine. “You’re nowhere near ready to hear about this.” She crossed her arms and slammed the door to the bathroom in my face. This wasn't going to be easy trying to avoid telling this highly strong woman all my deepest secrets. Some that she’ll never understand fully.
Chapter Ten
Vens - Monday 7th January
New Year, new me? I laughed at the thought. Christmas was always tough but New Year was probably worse. I’d stayed in on New Years Eve. Just so I wasn’t around any drug activity. I’d done too well to have it all ruined by one night. I yawned as I stretched out on the sofa, my arms felt heavy today and I spotted Av tip toeing past the living room door. I’d slept down here because she’d gone out and got absolutely wrecked. Jay had practically carried her home. He was sure she’d been spiked. I wasn’t so sure. I knew her head would have been extremely sore this morning. I smirked to myself and made my way towards the kitchen where she stood cradling her head. I rolled my eyes and placed my hand on the dip of her back. She rocked her hips from side to side and moaned inwardly.
“I’m so sorry,” she whispered. It was unclear whether it was an apology to herself or to me. The truth was she had no reason to apologise. We weren't really dating. She had every right to go out and get hammered and dance with whomever she wanted too. But that didn't make it any easier to swallow. She shook her head slowly and I was pretty sure I heard her swallow. “I mean it, I can’t even remember what happened.” She admitted. I rolled my eyes and moved my hand from her back. She stood slightly taller and turned to face me. Her face paled almost instantly and I crossed my arms against my chest in an effort to protect myself from her.