“I’m sure deep down he was thrilled; he can’t wait to have grandkids to spoil rotten.” I smiled thinking of Castor holding a little bundle in his big hands. Then I remembered why I was angry with him, wiping the smile right off my face.
“I know I was scared to become a mom. I didn’t exactly have the best examples of parenting from my biological mom and dad, but Pops showed me how a real father is with his kids. He wasn’t perfect, but he showed us love. I know Bart will do the same, or I’ll kick his ass.” She grinned up at Bart, from where he was holding her against his front.
“Hey, I’ll be a good dad! You don’t have to worry about kicking my ass. If Pops sees me not acting right, he’ll kick my ass. Shit, now you got me scared, I wasn’t until now. Can we rethink this whole baby thing? Maybe go again next year, or the year after. Maybe I can get some training from one of the guy’s kids?” Bliss turned in his arms swatting him against his chest as he started laughing. “Alright, I give, we’ll have the kid.”
“You’re lucky I know you’re joking, or I’d kicked your ass now. He’s even more excited about this than I am, if that’s possible. I’ll be honest; when we first found out I almost passed out from shock. Not that we were trying, but we weren’t doing anything to stop it either.” I was happy for them. They’d come a long way from the trauma her father put her through, she deserved happiness. Sadness overshadowed my joy for them though, an ache in my chest started to form, knowing I could never have what they have together. The man I loved could never be what Bart was to Bliss. I suddenly needed to get out of the house before I broke down in tears in front of them.
“I have to go; there is still a lot to do to get the office ready to open again. The security agency is coming this afternoon to put in the security system, and I have to be there. I’ll swing by tomorrow night to talk to Castor; I kind of owe him an apology. Then maybe he’ll be less of a bear to all of you.” If he didn’t cool it after my apology, I’d give him a good smack in the back of the head. Hugging Bart and Bliss goodbye, I headed to my office to await the security agency. It was the one thing Gino asked that I do to make him feel better about my safety. Even though I pointed out that I always carry, he wanted something more high-tech, and I gave in.
Waiting around for the security people gave me too much time to overthink what I would say to Castor when I saw him. The things I would say, the questions I needed answers for, and the end that would surely come. Love could only get you so far with a man like him. He didn’t want someone to settle down with, he wanted someone to have fun with and move on. That nagging voice in the back of my head that questioned that thought, I ignored it as best I could. If I listened to that voice, it would make me believe I meant something more to Castor, which wasn’t possible. Or was it? Damn my heart ached with the thought that he could care about me, that I could mean something other than a piece of ass. If I put myself out there, and he didn’t return even a fraction of my feelings; I didn’t think I could recover from the pain it would cause me.
Chapter Fourteen
POPS
I barely slept, I was too anxious to get home to find out what was going on. If there were something wrong, Bart would have said something I was sure of that, but something was up definitely. Bart was horrible at hiding things from me, always had been. That’s how I knew when he’d fallen in love with Bliss. He’d always loved her, but the moment he’d fallen in love with her, he couldn’t hide it from me. Bliss seemed oblivious, even though she’d been in love long before Bart had. She never saw the way Bart looked at her when she wasn’t paying attention.
There had been lust, but there had been love pure and simple when Bart looked at her. He’d refused to act on it for so long; I thought they would never figure it out. Thankfully, they’d finally gotten their heads out of their asses. It had taken a lot of pain on both sides, but they made it in the end, which was what was important. I hated to admit it, but I was jealous of what they had. It was something I wanted for myself. They deserved to be happy, I couldn’t fault them for that, but I wanted that kind of happiness for myself.
Bethy was my path to that kind of happiness, and if she ever came back to me, I’d show her exactly that. I’d show her in every way possible how much she meant to me. How much I was willing to do to prove that to her, and never let her go once I had her. Walking away from her had been the hardest thing I’d ever had to do; not knowing if I’d ever see her again about killed me. Faith, I had to have faith that she would come back to me, that we were meant to be together.
In the wee hours of the morning, I gave up trying to sleep. Flinging the sheets off, I quickly got dressed. After packing up the cabin and securing it, I began the short journey home. If I made good time, I’d make it home long before lunch. Then I could interrogate my son ‘til he told me what the hell was going on. There was just a dusting of fog on the ground as I made my way down the mountain from the hunting cabin. My truck rattled down the path, feeling like it hit every single bump in the road. Making me wish I’d gotten at least a few hours of sleep, if I was going to make it coffee was going to need to be on the menu.
I was about half way down the mountain when the elusive deer we looked for the previous day, jumped out in front of my truck. There was no time to think, I swerved the wheel to the left trying to avoid the drop off on the opposite side of my truck. I tried to slam on my breaks, but it was too late. There was a huge tree directly in front of me. My last thought before darkness descended on me was I’d never get a chance to tell Bethy I loved her.
Beth
It had been two days since I’d stopped by Castor’s to see him, two days, and I hadn’t heard anything. I kept having this bad feeling that something was wrong, but I brushed it off as simply worrying over seeing him again. Every time I thought about what I needed to say to him, my anxiety picked up. The fear of his response kept me from going to his house again, rejection was not my cup of tea, and that’s exactly what I was afraid of.
Getting my office together should have been plenty of distraction, but everywhere I looked, I saw Castor. From the first day he came in my office when he wasn’t sure about me to how he had opened up to Bliss and Bart. A man like him never let others see weakness, and he’d seen exposing himself as a weakness. He did it though, for Bliss, for Bart, he’d opened himself up, because he loved them enough to do whatever it took to help his children. He made me rethink what I thought of men like him, that maybe they weren’t all like Michael, that maybe some of them could love.
Someone knocking on the office door drew my attention. I wasn’t opening for a few more days, but the person on the other side was being very persistent. Touching the gun at my back, I pulled it out, holding it to my side just in case it was someone friendly. When I reached the door to look out, I saw Bliss, tears streaming down her face, looking lost. Putting the gun back in its holster tucked in the back of my jeans, I quickly opened the door.
“Bliss what is it? What happened?” My first thought was she’d lost the baby somehow. She flung herself into my arms, sobbing against my shoulder, her words muffled. Bart was right behind her rubbing his hand on her back in comfort, with sadness in his eyes.
“Beth, it’s Pops, you should come with us.” The earth felt like it dropped out from under me. I couldn’t muster the strength to ask any questions. Instead, I followed them out the door, remembered to lock up somehow, then got in the truck with both of them. What if it was too late to tell him anything? What if I’d missed my chance for answers? Finding my voice, I finally asked the question I wasn’t sure I wanted the answer to.
“What happened?” Bliss reached for my hand holding it tightly.
“When Pops didn’t come home yesterday we knew something wasn’t right, he’d said he was going to be home. He never says that and then doesn’t show up, we called a friend of ours that lives close to the cabin to go check on him. We thought maybe the truck wouldn’t start, or got stuck, or maybe he’d bagged a huge deer. Our friend called us about an
hour ago, he found Pops, he was...he was...he wasn’t moving. He’d wrecked the truck, hit a tree head on, and he wasn’t moving. They rushed him to the hospital, but they said it doesn’t look good Beth.” A sob escaped me as Bliss began crying once again, we held each other close, needing each other’s support. I glanced over at Bart who had a death grip on the steering wheel, tears were streaming down his face, and he didn’t even try to brush them away.
“He’s strong, he’s fucking superman, and he won’t leave us. Fuck!” Bart slammed his fist against the wheel. “He can’t leave us now; he has so much to live for. He wouldn’t leave our baby without a grandpops, he wouldn’t.” Bart was trying to convince himself that things weren’t as bleak as they seemed, I couldn’t find it in me to correct him though. Castor was fucking superman, he couldn’t leave me, not without knowing I loved him.
It didn’t feel like it took long for us to get to the hospital, Bliss hesitated at the threshold, her lip trembling on the verge of more tears. Bart pulled her against his side, whispered something in her ear that made her smile, and nodded before heading inside. Bliss reached over and held my hand, as we made our way to the nurse’s station to ask where Castor’s room was.
The hospital was full of sounds with all the machines beeping, but as soon as we entered Castor’s room, everything else seemed to vanish. He laid there draped in the white sheets of the hospital bed looking just as pale as the sheets under the fluorescent lights. There were bruises and cuts all over his face, but the large bandage on his forehead hid the worst of it. Bliss rushed forward, holding his hand as she began to speak to him.
“We’re here, you can wake up now, come on Pops. Why aren’t you waking up? Bart make him open his eyes!” She looked back at Bart as if he had all the answers, but he looked just as lost as she did. Something inside me snapped into place in that moment, someone needed to take charge of the situation.
“Bart, why don’t you take Bliss for a walk, I’ll stay and see if I can speak to the doctor about what they are doing for him. This kind of stress isn’t good for the baby. Bliss, please honey, go take a walk, do it for the baby.” That got her moving, touching her stomach with a slight smile.
“If he wakes up, you’ll tell him we are here right?” Nodding, Bart mouthed “thank you” as he took her out of the room with him. I knew it was hard for him to walk away from his father, but he also knew that his father wouldn’t want Bliss to lose the baby on top of everything else.
I sat there, holding his hand, watching his chest rise and fall evenly. The machine monitoring his heart rate looked good, he was breathing just fine, which meant that his head injury was the problem. By the look of things, it looked like he’d gone toe to toe with Ali, not a fucking truck. It felt like forever before the doctor came, when he asked me if I was family I lied, saying I was his wife. He looked doubtful but didn’t argue. It was better for me to know what was going on, so I could break it to Bliss and Bart.
“He has a severe concussion, but what is concerning us is that it looks like he has swelling on the brain. We took scans and it doesn’t look very good right now, we are going to do another set of scans in the morning to see if the swelling has gone down, and if it hasn’t we may need to go in and relieve the pressure. I know it sounds strange, but sleeping like this is a good thing, his body needs to heal itself. Mrs. Stone, is there anyone we can call for you?” Just as he was asking, Bliss and Bart walked in the room. Bliss gave her a knowing smile making it clear she’d heard the doctor call her Mrs. Stone.
“No, our children are here with us, but thank you doctor.” As soon as the doctor left the room, Bliss was all over me.
“You told him you were his wife, oh my God Beth. Wait ‘til Pops hears this!” The walk had done her good, she looked better, and so did Bart.
“Yeah, well I forgot when you two left they’d only give information to family, so I did the only thing I could think of. If you tell him, I’ll disown you!” She laughed.
“You just claimed me as your kid, and now you’re going to disown me, that’s just not right. So, what did the doctor say Mrs. Stone?” After I explained the situation, it took me another hour to convince them to go home and let me stay with him. Only after I promised to call them as soon as anything changed did they concede.
I must have fallen asleep at some point, because the nurse shaking my shoulder jolted me awake. “Mrs. Stone would you like us to get you a blanket and pillows for the fold out there.” She pointed to the chair on the other side of Castor’s bed. Looking at Castor’s face, he hadn’t changed at all in the time I’d been there, no movement, nothing.
“Thank you, yes that would be good. I must have been more tired than I thought when I got here.” She was back before I knew it, with a thick blanket and pillow, and I helped her get the chair converted into a bed. Reaching over, I grabbed his hand in mine, needing to feel close to him.
The next time I awoke was when they were wheeling Castor out to get his new scans. “I’m sorry Mrs. Stone, we were trying not to wake you.”
“Please call me Beth, it’s fine I need to be awake anyway. Was there any change during the night while I was sleeping?”
“No, there doesn’t seem to be, but let’s wait ‘til the doctor looks at his scans.” The nurse patted my hand in sympathy, but it did nothing to comfort me. Watching them wheel him out of the room, I sent up a silent prayer that it was good news. I was flipping through the channels on his television when they wheeled him back in. The nurse told me the doctor would be in shortly to tell me about what the scans showed.
Reaching over, I held his hand. Brushing my thumb against his in circles, he felt so warm to my touch. I could almost believe he was simply sleeping. “You need to wake up. I have so much to tell you, if you would just wake up. There are so many things left unsaid between us, so many unanswered questions, just wake up please.” The doctor startled me when he entered the room mid-sentence.
“That’s actually, a really good idea Mrs. Stone; studies show that the more you talk to someone like this, the quicker they recover. The scans look good; his swelling is down. I’d say if we’re lucky he’ll come out of it in a few days’ time, if not sooner. So, make sure to talk to him, the more interaction he has, the faster his brain will kick in to respond.” I let out a sigh of relief; I couldn’t wait to tell Bart and Bliss.
“Thank you doctor, I’ll let his children know immediately.” No sooner was the doctor out the door, that I pick up my phone to call Bliss. As soon as she heard the news, she squealed in delight. I think I lost my hearing for a bit. I could even hear Bart in the background give a shout of relief, I hoped Castor knew how loved he was by his children.
I’d just hung up with the kids when a raspy voice out of nowhere said, “Mrs. Stone is it? Hello, beautiful. Did I miss a wedding while I was out?” I let out a little shriek as I looked up at the grinning face of Castor. Torn between wanting to smack him for scaring the shit out of me and hugging him to me, I did a little of both. “Hey now, don’t be hitting the man lying in the hospital bed.”
POPS
I’d been awake since they wheeled me into my room, I wasn’t sure where I’d come from, but from the ache all over my body I’d say it wasn’t good. It took me far longer to open my eyes, they seemed to want to fight me, but I could hear everything as I laid there trying to get my body to work. When the doctor called her Mrs. Stone, I felt my heart give a jump. Hell yeah, that sounded fucking good to me. I listened while she talked to Bliss and Bart. I could even hear their excitement from the bed.
I’d finally gotten my eyes to cooperate with me while she was distracted with the phone call. Damn if she wasn’t the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. My heart gave another lurch, I wanted to reach out and touch her, pull her into my arms and kiss her breathless. My voice, when I finally spoke, sounded like I was talking around broken glass, rough. My throat was dry and felt like sandpaper against my tongue. Yeah, no kissing just yet.
“You scared the shit
out of me. Here, let me get you some water, and call the nurse. Your doctor just left. Oh yeah, I guess you know that since you heard him. How long have you been awake? Do you remember what happened to you? Does anything hurt? Do you want something for the pain?” The poor thing looked like she’d slept like shit; dark circles under her eyes, and her clothes were rumpled. Looking at the chair next to my bed, I noticed the blanket and pillow. I instantly felt like an ass for making her sleep in something so uncomfortable.
“Woah, slow down there, honey. Can we start with the big pink elephant in the room?” She looked a little scared, with tears starting to pool in her eyes. “So, when did we get married?” Her face broke out in a small smile as she called the nurse, shaking her head.
After the nurse came in, she started checking my vitals, helping me to the bathroom, telling me not to get out of bed on my own yet, and giving me a pitcher full of water, we were finally alone again. Bethy looked at me nervously sitting next to my bed, wringing her hands in her lap while looking at me expectantly.
“They wouldn’t let me stay if I wasn’t family Castor; it was a little white lie. Bliss couldn’t stay with you in her condition. It wouldn’t be good for her, or the baby. Bart doesn’t like being away from Bliss any longer than necessary, so I elected myself.”
“I’m not angry; I just figured if I was going to be married I might as well have enjoyed the honeymoon. Now would you mind telling me how the hell I got in here? The last thing I remember was heading down the mountain from the cabin. I’m going to assume that’s when this, whatever this is, happened.” Before she could tell me anything my doctor came through the door, he introduced himself, and went over exactly what happened. Told me how lucky I was to be alive, if I hadn’t been found when I did things could have ended very differently.
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