by C. R. Jane
I couldn’t eat at lunch, and both Caiden and Jackson kept asking me what was wrong. Jackson kept throwing Donovan dirty looks where he was sitting at the table next to ours, suspicious that he was the culprit.
Donovan was an idiot. He had to be, because when I walked to the trashcan to throw away my still full lunch tray, he mouthed off to me again. “Your pussy must be real tight to keep both the twins coming to you. That’s the only thing I can think of. Your pussy must be gold-plated.”
Jackson happened to be stepping up to throw his tray away right as those words came out of Donovan’s mouth.
That was his first mistake.
"You think you can talk to her like that?" Jackson screamed at Donovan. Jackson's normally blue eyes were so dark, they almost looked black. This was going to get out of control if Caiden or I didn't step in.
"Caiden, calm him down," I begged him. Caiden looked a little bit shell-shocked, and he made no immediate move to step in. Donovan got in Jackson's face, the wrong move for more reasons than one. "She's not sucking my dick," he taunted. "I don't have to forget that she's nothing but trash."
That was his last one. Jackson was on him, throwing him to the ground as he started to throw punches at Donovan’s face.
The first punch broke Donovan’s nose, and blood started gushing out, splattering the front of his shirt.
"Stop," I screamed as I watched in terror, but Jackson was too far gone. He was lost to a place I couldn't find him. Punch after punch landed, until Donovan’s face looked more like hamburger than human. Finally, Caiden stepped in and pulled Jackson off him.
Jackson was shaking, his eyes so dark, they resembled Caiden’s. He tried to buck against Caiden’s grip, and then teachers were running out, no doubt summoned by frantic students who'd run for help as soon as the fight began.
Horror gripped me as Mrs. Gomez, my English teacher, knelt by Donovan’s side. "Someone call the authorities," she yelled frantically. There were multiple people on Jackson now, who was still out of control.
The next thirty minutes were awful. An ambulance arrived on site, and medical personnel rushed out wheeling a bed that they hurriedly placed Donovan on. Students were crying, and the teachers all looked scared.
Jackson had finally calmed down, but the damage had been done. The police arrived, and Jackson was handcuffed and led to a car. He looked back at me, a confused look on his face, as if he didn't know what had happened. Caiden came by my side and put his arm around my waist comfortingly as his twin shot him a look of betrayal.
I cried harder as they stuffed him into the car, and I buried my face in Caiden’s neck as he stroked my hair and told me everything would be fine. I guess it should've registered that Caiden should have been calling his parents to help out his brother, but I was still shocked at what Jackson had just done.
I’d obviously seen his episodes before, but it wasn't until that moment that I saw how bad they could get.
After a life of constantly feeling out of control, I was rethinking everything. Out of control was literally written in Jackson’s DNA. Jackson refused to take medicine, and I'd always supported him because I knew how numb it made him feel, but after seeing that…I didn't know what the answer was.
"You need to call your parents," I finally said, when I realized that Caiden still hadn't reached for his phone.
"The school already called them,” he told me reassuringly. "Come on, let's get you home," he told me as he tried to lead me to the truck.
"No," I answered stubbornly. "We either have to go to the hospital to check on Donovan, or go to the police station and check on Jackson."
Something flashed in Caiden’s eyes that I didn't recognize. "You're not going anywhere near that kid," he barked. "Not after what he said to you."
"Everyone says that about me," I glumly reminded him. "But it's my fault that he was injured like that. I should've done something to calm Jackson down."
"Fuck you should have," he answered tersely. "My brother’s been getting more and more out of control. My parents have had to push more and more things under the rug. This wasn't your fault. Jackson needs to get his head out of his ass and take his medicine,” Caiden growled, a fierce look on his face.
"He hates that stuff," I reminded him.
"You could've gotten hurt today. I don't care what that jackass wants," he responded. It was the first time I'd ever heard Caiden talk badly of Jackson, and it was unsettling. They'd always been a united front. Caiden the light to Jackson's complicated dark. It was weird to me to hear Caiden so angry with his brother.
"Let's go check on Jackson. We need to make sure that your parents actually get there. Didn't you say that they were about to leave on a trip?" I reminded him.
Caiden blew out an exasperated breath. "Dad did have a work trip. He's going to be furious, and not just because he's going to have to pay off Donovan’s parents."
He led me to Jackson’s truck, keeping his arm around me. Caiden opened my door for me and helped me in, since my legs still seemed to be made out of jelly. We were quiet on the way to the police station. Caiden put on my favorite song, and he reached across the center console to hold my hand. But instead of making me swoon like usual, the move felt wrong somehow, like it was premeditated. Almost like he was taking advantage of what happened with Jackson. I pushed the thought aside. That wasn't Caiden. Caiden loved his brother. He was just being there for me like always. Guilt assailed me for doubting him.
We got to the police station, and I was nervous about the twin’s parents seeing me. They already disapproved of them spending so much time with me, and it was almost a guarantee that they would think that this was my fault. Which it was…
We walked in, and sure enough, the twin’s parents were talking tersely with a man dressed in a sharp gray suit.
"That's Robert, our family attorney. It must be serious," Caiden whispered to me. He surprised me by taking my hand as we walked. His mother, Miranda, noticed it right away, and seemed to have trouble dragging her gaze from our clasped fingers.
"Your brother’s really done it now," Mrs. Parker said with a grimace as she finally pulled her eyes to Caiden’s face, patting his cheek gently. "Donovan’s parents are already threatening a lawsuit, and the police are talking about charges of assault and battery," she said worriedly.
"Good," Caiden muttered, and both his mother and I jerked to look at him, shocked.
He shifted uncomfortably, as if he hadn't meant for that to escape his mouth.
"I didn't mean that," Caiden said quickly. "He just went too far today. He's getting worse."
Mrs. Parker wrung her hands. "He is. I don't know what to do," she said quietly, staring off into space. Abruptly, she must have remembered that I was standing there because she looked embarrassed to have said that in front of me.
"Everly, why don't you go on home, dear? I'm sure that Jackson will call you as soon as he's out," she told me in a nice voice that was obviously fake.
Caiden dropped my hand and put his arm around my waist again, pulling me towards him.
"She wants to stay, Mom," he said firmly, and his mother's mouth dropped. Mine did as well, because it very clearly felt like Caiden was claiming me in that moment.
And I didn't think that I wanted to be claimed.
I said nothing though, not wanting to make a scene. His mother must have been on my wavelength, because she sent Caiden a look that clearly said they would be talking about me later, and then she flashed me another fake smile.
"I'm going to go check in with the attorney," she said, turning and walking away.
Caiden led me over to a chair, and I sat down, chewing on my nails nervously as we waited.
"Surely your attorney can get Donovan’s family to drop the charges. Especially after they find out that their son was bullying someone," I commented as I watched the officers at work around us.
Caiden didn't say anything, and I sat up straighter at how contemplative he seemed.
"It will be
alright," I reassured him. "Jackson always gets himself out of these things," I told him, assuming he was worried about his twin.
"I think Jackson has gotten too out of control for you to be around him anymore by yourself," he blurted out.
I looked at him like he was crazy. "Caiden, you know that he would never hurt me," I exclaimed. "He was defending me today. It was wrong what he did. But he'll learn from this. He can come back from it."
Caiden was already shaking his head before I was finished speaking. "There are things you don't know about Jackson," he told me. "Remember that Tamara girl in your physics class last fall...?"
"Yes," I responded slowly, not understanding what he was getting at.
"He took her on a date in October and things went too far. He ended up hurting her when she said no," Caiden said somberly, as if he was embarrassed to have to tell me.
My mouth opened in shock. “Caiden, you don’t actually believe that,” I scolded him. “Jackson would never do that.”
He just shook his head at my response, pursing his lips angrily. We didn’t talk much after that. He stayed stuck to my side like glue, which normally I wouldn't mind, but all I wanted to do in that moment was talk to Jackson. Their mother finally came to my rescue.
"Caiden, let's go. We’re going to grab something to eat with Robert. The Chief of Police just left for dinner, and we're going to have a little run in with him," she said. It was obvious what "run in" meant. One good thing about the rich, Jackson would be getting out of jail sooner rather than later, and probably without anything on his record. For a second, I thought about Donovan’s broken face that would likely never be the same again, but I quickly pushed the image out of my head.
I would always be on Jackson’s and Caiden’s side.
"Everly’s coming with us," said Caiden, reaching for my hand, again. Luckily for me, his mother was already shaking her head.
"You need to do this for your brother. And Everly needs to go home. The police told us that this happened because Jackson was defending Everly," she said disapprovingly.
Caiden opened his mouth to object again, but I touched his shoulder softly. "I need to get home anyway. Call me later?"
"How are you going to get home?" Caiden asked.
"My mom will come get me," I lied. Caiden looked at me like he didn't believe me. And he shouldn’t. But he decided to let it go. I doubt he would be able to convince his parents that I needed to be driven home first.
I pretended to walk out with them, and then as soon as they got into Mr. Parker's Mercedes and left, I looked around and went back into the police station. I wasn't sure why I was there. I highly doubted that they were going to let me see Jackson.
Employees in the police department gave me questioning glances as I sat there, but I ignored them.
Hours passed, and finally an employee came over to me. “Darlin’, do we need to call your parents?” she asked.
“I’m just waiting for news about Jackson Parker,” I murmured sleepily.
“Jackson Parker was let go an hour ago,” she responded with a frown.
I sat up straighter in my chair “How did I miss him?”
“There’s a separate entrance out back. The chief himself took him through there. I’m sure he’s home by now.”
I nodded, standing up. I was sore from sitting on that hard chair, but relieved that Jackson had been released. It definitely paid to be rich.
It was a long walk home.
I was at the twin’s house bright and early the next morning. Caiden had texted me at midnight saying that Jackson had gotten home. I wasn’t sure why he told me hours after Jackson had been released. But I guess they would all have been busy dealing with the fallout.
Jackson was suspended for the last few days of school, but all the charges against him had been dropped. It helped that he was a minor as well. The police were able to classify the fight as just “rough play” around the schoolyard, although that was the most ridiculous way to describe what had happened that I’d ever heard.
I timed my arrival at the twin’s house for when I knew Caiden would be at soccer practice. As I knocked on the door, I just hoped that it would be their butler who answered and not one of their parents.
To my surprise, a tired looking Jackson opened the door. For a moment, he looked relieved to see me, but then the look disappeared off his face, and there was just blankness.
"Everly, you need to go home," he told me as he tried to close the door in my face.
I put my hand out to stop the door, and Jackson stopped pushing on it, not wanting to hurt me.
"Let me come in," I begged. I hated the vibe I was getting between us.
"Everly, I'm tired. We can talk later."
I knew that if we didn't talk right now, whatever was going on between us would just get worse.
"You're not allowed to shut me out Jackson Parker," I scolded him, pushing my way inside. Jackson rolled his eyes as he opened the door, but there was a hint of a smile on his face.
I expected him to take me to his room where we usually hung out when we were alone, but instead, he took me to the living room. The dread I had been feeling since the fight only intensified as he sat in a chair a few feet away from the couch I was sitting on like he was desperate for space.
"What's going on?" I asked nervously, fiddling with the hem of my shirt.
"Everly, I didn't want to have to even talk about this. But I guess you're going to make it awkward for both of us?"
Apprehension curled up in my stomach.
"I just wanted to make sure you were alright after what happened."
He pushed a frustrated hand through his hair that looked more blonde than gold right now under the sun that was shining through the window. His eyes were still darker than normal, showing he was still coming out of an episode.
"Eves, you've got to let this little crush you have on me, go," he said carefully, his hands beating out a nervous rhythm on his legs as he spoke. He looked me straight in the eye, and there was no sign on his face that he was kidding.
My mouth dropped open. A little crush? Was he not present at his birthday party? Was he not a willing accomplice to that kiss? A kiss I'd been obsessing about since it happened.
"Don't look at me like that," he responded with a sigh. "I was drunk at that party. And you'd been staring at me like a kicked puppy all night. I shouldn't have given in."
My whole body shook with rage. I wanted to punch him in the fucking face.
"You self-indulgent prick. You were not drunk. Don't try and pussy your way out of this because you're scared, Jackson," I raged at him.
He kept the same, stoic, stupid face as I yelled.
"Everly, just drop it. I'm your friend, so I should be able to tell you when you're being pathetic."
His words sliced into me, carving up my heart into little pieces and scattering them in the wind. "Maybe we should just have some space for a while until you get over the unfortunate feelings you think you have."
"Unfortunate feelings..." I whispered as I looked at him disbelievingly. Who was this person sitting in front of me? Since the day I'd met him, there hadn't been a day where Jackson hadn't wanted to see me. "If that's what you think," I finally said stiffly. "You know better than anyone that I don't like to be where I'm not wanted."
He flinched from that barbed statement, but I didn't care. I headed towards the door, numb...feeling like my whole life had been rearranged in a moment. I stopped in front of the door. "You're a coward, Jackson Parker, or you wouldn't have done this. Don't bother trying to come for me when you get over whatever this was," I warned him angrily. And I meant it. Even with all the shit I'd experienced over the years, no one had hurt me as bad as what he'd just done.
I was already missing him as I slammed the door behind me. I heard something crash from inside, but I didn't go back in to check on what had happened. He deserved every feeling that he was experiencing right now.
I was so lost in my misery that I s
macked right into a hard chest.
"Woah, there, LyLy. What's going on? What are you doing here?" Caiden asked. I looked at him with watery eyes. "Wow...baby. What's wrong?” His face curled up in distress and then anger. "What did that fucking asshole do now?" he hissed, letting me go as he prepared to march inside to confront Jackson.
I held up my hands to stop him beseechingly. "It's fine. It was obviously something I needed to hear."
"He shouldn't have said something to hurt your feelings. He's an idiot."
A hiccupping sob rushed out of my mouth.
He pulled me back towards his chest and softly rubbed my back. I felt so worthless. So lonely. For so long, Jackson had always been there. I'd never imagined a day when he didn't want to be. Maybe there really was something wrong with me.
"Shhh, baby. Whatever you're thinking, stop it." I looked up at him with watery eyes. "Want to get out of here?" he asked, his eyes flicking all over my face.
I nodded numbly, and he slid his arm around me as he led me to his Jeep.
We were quiet as we drove, and I wasn't even paying attention to where we were going. My mind was racing over every detail of my interactions with Jackson since the kiss. Why was he doing this? It wasn't like it was the first time he'd gotten in a fight because of something someone said about me. Maybe that was it. Maybe he was tired of getting in trouble for me. But it wasn't like I had ever once asked him to fight or even stand up for me. And when he was speedy, he got into fights about everything.
"Everly!" Caiden's voice bit through the turmoil coursing through my mind. I looked over at him in the driver's seat where he was staring at me concerned. I offered him a weak smile.
"Let's go for a walk," he suggested as he shut off the car. I looked around and realized that we were by the lake at one of my favorite spots to come with the guys.
We got out of the car, and Caiden grabbed my hand as he led me over to the walking trail that led around the entire lake. Our walk was silent for a while, but being outside surrounded by nature was doing the trick. I could feel myself relaxing.
"I knew you would like this," commented Caiden, and I looked over at him and saw him watching me. I felt shy under his gaze.