by Sajni Patel
“No. I would never do that before you had your chance.”
“Give him to her,” Shilpa encouraged as she devoured her dinner.
“Oh, no, I don’t…” I stuttered over my words.
Jay’s warmth crowded me, and his arm pressed against mine as he slipped the bundle into my arms. “Sit down,” he whispered.
We sat together, and my eyes watered at the sight of this tiny, perfect boy. “You guys made a nice-looking kid,” I said.
They grinned.
I sat against the bench. Jay stretched his arm over the top of the back and rubbed my opposite arm. Was this what it would feel like to hold our baby together? And was I actually thinking of having babies?
“What’s his name?” Jay asked, stroking the baby’s cheek with his free hand.
“In the tradition of the Shah men, his name is Joshil,” Jahn said.
“Josh…” Jay hummed. “Perfect.”
When he glanced at me, his eyes twinkled. Of course they did. He was an uncle. I didn’t notice Jahn taking pictures of us until I rose to hand the baby to Jay’s mom. She gratefully took him as I congratulated all of them.
“Is there anything anyone needs?” I asked.
They shook their heads as Shilpa and Jahn profusely thanked me.
“It was my pleasure. Thank you so much for allowing me to be here. I’ll let you guys bond and gush, and I’ll see you soon?”
“You better see us soon,” Shilpa said as I slinked away.
I hurried once I left the room, hoping to avoid Jay. But the man was fast and agile and was at my side before I hit the lobby.
“Running off so fast?” he asked.
“This is your family time.”
“You’re family.”
I swallowed, a little dizzy from that simple yet profoundly overwhelming statement. I still had to deal with employees, and the interview for the job of my dreams. I wanted to tell Jay about Dallas, I really did, but how could I tell him now? How could I tell him that I had spent this entire morning updating my résumé and filling out a lengthy application? “I have a lot of work, early morning. Who knew closing down would be so busy?”
“Yeah. My firm will send me elsewhere, but what about you? Have you looked for work yet?”
“Yes. Sam is actually trying to help me out in that area with tips and recommendations. I’ll be fine. But you should definitely stay a while longer.”
“I will. Thanks for helping.” He kissed my cheek. “See you at work tomorrow. I’ll be wrapping up my last few days with Reinli BioChem. Oh, and this weekend? Still on for family dinner?”
Did I want to see him so soon? His family had integrated me into their fold with open arms. My ovaries actually tingled, tingled, at the sight of Jay holding a baby. What the crap? I needed to take a step back, clear my head, make sure that I wasn’t losing myself in whatever this was.
Was I softer? Emotionally dependent on a man? Or was this how things were supposed to be? Loving, caring? Would that turn into marriage? Worshipping? Having to answer to someone?
“No. The bridal shower for Reema is this weekend. Lots of preparation.”
“Ah, that’s right. Rohan is having his bachelor party,” he said.
“What are you guys doing?”
“Strip club, naturally,” he responded with a serious face that broke my heart. He was going to let some woman grind on him? He’d let someone else rub their boobs in his face? The thought of him touching someone else, of someone else having the privilege of getting that close to him—that was not going to happen.
I opened my mouth, fully prepared to snap back with an, “Oh, hell no.”
But he chuckled. “Kidding. Can you imagine poor Rohan in a strip club? He’d freeze up in a corner.”
My lips lifted in a shaky smile. How was I supposed to handle this? I’d never cared about a man like this.
“All right. Have a good night. I’ll text you later?” he said.
“Sure. Have fun with your brand-new nephew. Josh is the perfect addition to your family.”
It was Friday and there were still another few days left until the big announcement, making every minute at work keeping the secret to myself agonizing.
And then there was…the job. Not just any job, but THE JOB FOR ME. The dream company that I had applied to months ago was now considering me for a management position instead of the lab position that they’d originally offered.
The phone and video interviews had gone so well on Wednesday that they’d brought me out to the site in Dallas for the final interview yesterday. It went extremely well. Which meant they might offer, and I’d have to leave behind my friends. It was hard to make real friends, and I wasn’t ready to say goodbye.
But this job also meant leaving behind Jay. I was not about to turn down a job that I desperately wanted for a man. Even a man like Jay…a man whom I might be falling for…a man who scared me with all the possibilities of normalcy that came with a healthy relationship.
For all the blunt attributes I’d developed over the years, they sure knew how to fail me now.
Wendy swung through the door, her hair flowing and her makeup on point.
“Where are you going all pretty?” I asked.
“We’re going to a bar.”
“Um. Sure?”
She frowned and peered over her shoulder. “Look, I know what’s going down.”
I jumped to my feet and pulled her into my office, checking behind her to make sure no one overheard. “How did you find out?”
“Well, I’d caught a few comments here and there through the door.”
“Eavesdropping?”
“Coming to give you coffee or messages or the files you’d asked for. Not intentionally. And I had my suspicions with the way you’ve been acting, especially every time Sam came around. I wasn’t sure until now, to be honest.”
“Oh…confirmed it myself. Rookie mistake,” I groaned.
She took my hand and squeezed before letting go. “I’m about to be out of a job. Unemployed. Miserable. Scrambling to pay rent. I need an evening of getting hammered.”
“Uh, you know? Bars are expensive. Maybe we should hit up a liquor store? My treat.” I offered a probably not very convincing smile, hoping she’d take the bait. The idea of going to a bar unhinged me. Having guys hit on me would be an annoying flashback to the old me that I didn’t want to get near again.
“Please? It won’t cost us anything…I mean…with you as my wing girl?”
“You’re using me?” I smirked, amused.
“You get so many free drinks. Teach me your ways.”
I laughed. “I’m sorry, Wendy. I have so much to deal with right now…and bars aren’t my scene anymore.”
“What about the super nice ones at the fancy hotels?”
“I don’t know.”
“Please? Please? Please? I don’t feel like going out alone or getting slammed at home and doing something stupid like emailing an all-caps letter encompassing pure rage to Sam and all the higher-ups.”
I rubbed my forehead but couldn’t find any valid excuse to deny Wendy. She, like so many others come Monday, would be in a world of financial hurt. Besides, it wasn’t as if I would accept any drinks from men. I mean…how full of myself was I to think anyone would offer me anything?
“Okay. But I’m not drinking…” I warned.
“There’s no fun in that!”
Yet, after work, we grabbed our jackets and purses and drove downtown to one of my old favorite hot spots. The ambiance was chill and laid back, and patrons dressed in business attire drank off the day in the glimmering bar.
Wendy had changed out of work clothes and into a cute little green dress and heels before we burst through the gold-rimmed double doors.
We sat at the counter and perused a menu of items that we had no intention of paying for.
“No matter what’s going on in your head, if you pretend to be confident and act like the only woman in the room, then you’ve done the
job,” I said calmly.
“I can pretend.”
“Now arch that back and look like you’re living your best life. The guys will come around. They almost always go for the classy, got-your-crap-together-and-don’t-need-them vibe.”
“So much to learn. So little time. Uh, one of these drinks is half of my weekly lunch budget,” Wendy muttered.
“It won’t take long.” I tapped my fingernail against my cheek and smiled at the two men down the bar who watched us. With that single look, the game began.
This started out as Wendy’s thing, but showing her my techniques, as basic as they were, lured me back to a place where I didn’t want to be. But it was also a comfort zone.
“I miss this, being out with you,” Wendy said smugly as she nudged arms with a handsome man in a suit.
“Me, too,” I lied.
“Want to go upstairs?” a man asked me, one of several.
I clenched my jaw every time. “No. I’m neither available nor interested.”
“But I just bought—”
I held a finger to his lips. “Shh. There’s no sign on the door that says you can buy sex with a few drinks.”
He scoffed. “That’s usually how this works.”
“Well, next time ask before you buy the drinks.”
He shook his head and muttered some obscenities.
Hours passed, cocktails and drinks were downed, appetizers were eaten. The food tasted more like acid than high-quality dining. The drinks turned bitter and foul in my stomach.
But I kept on. I wasn’t sure why. Maybe because I didn’t want to make a scene or leave Wendy alone. Maybe I had to stand by to make sure she’d be okay. I didn’t miss this at all, and I abhorred the touching. I was one minute away from retracting all the drinks and footing the several-hundred-dollar tab on my own when I realized the reason behind my sudden shift in this old lifestyle.
It was the past. I wasn’t interested anymore. It wasn’t therapeutic or fun or unwinding.
“Are you there?” Wendy asked me, her speech slurred. “What are you thinking about?”
I gave her a soft smile. Jay. I was thinking that I’d rather be snuggled on the couch with Jay debating TV shows.
Easing off the high barstool, I said, “I’m thinking we should call it a night.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
Jay
It was Saturday night, and Rohan’s bachelor party meant being treated to luxurious shaves and treatments.
We had dinner at an upscale restaurant, made toasts, and relaxed. Rohan was a happy, happy man with a lovely bride, and he couldn’t stop smiling. His joy was most definitely contagious and took my mind off Dad’s death for those couple of hours.
“Whoa!” Rohan sat back and read a text. “Reema just messaged.”
“That’s against the rules of the bachelor party,” I said and snatched his phone.
“The girls ended up at this swanky club, like reservations are booked for a year out. They have a huge, private booth and want us to join them.”
“That’s the opposite of a bachelor party, man!”
“Yeah, but our night’s winding down. We’ve had some drinks here, and it’s been fun, but they’re at the ritziest club in town! I just want to see what it looks like!”
The others agreed, so we headed out.
Liya came down and grabbed us from the lobby, throwing out a group hello and hooking arms with Rohan to lead him first as we followed. We didn’t hug or kiss. We were…still a little awkward around each other in front of our friends.
Liya was as stunning as ever in a snug gold dress with red heels. Her waves flowed down her back and her cheeks flushed the moment she saw me. She gave a shy smile and focused on Rohan. I grinned to myself, somewhat satisfied knowing that she didn’t look at any other man the way she looked at me. I stuffed my hands into my pockets and followed the guys.
The club was nice, and we immediately took in the grandeur of shimmering gold and crystal chandeliers. Women walked around with trays of complimentary champagne with gold flakes. Everyone was dressed to the nines, bling twinkled on every wrist and neck. Even the servers looked like their cars cost more than mine.
The music was loud, and dozens of clustered booths created a circle around a dance floor of writhing bodies. We walked up a grand staircase, following the banister that overlooked the crowd below, and headed into a private booth. The kind with curtains, a huge table, and curved bench seating that could hold ten people.
It was a little quieter up here, and Reema squealed as soon as she saw Rohan. She threw her hands around his neck and kissed him.
I cleared my throat, not that they could hear the subtlety. Inside the booth, tiered plates with meticulously created finger foods filled the table, along with cocktails and bottles of champagne. We ate and drank and admired the spacious area before everyone went out to the dance floor, leaving Liya and me alone.
She kept her hands in her lap and bit her ruby-red lips. The things that simple little act did to me. Electricity practically ignited the air between us.
“We don’t know how to act in front of our friends, do we?” she asked.
I laughed and slid closer to her on the semicircular bench, my arm on the back behind her shoulders. She smelled amazing, hints of flower and vanilla and spice.
“Guess they don’t all know, huh?” I touched her hair, and she melted into me.
“Jay?” she asked and turned in to me.
“Hmm?” I leaned down to kiss her. I couldn’t help it.
I pulled her closer as our kiss deepened. My hand dropped to her bare knee and skated up an inch. Maybe two. Her fingers pressed into my shoulder.
“Were you going to say something?” I muttered against her mouth.
“I love—” She froze, her eyes wide as she caught herself.
I chuckled, but my heart wasn’t as calm as my voice. “Yes? You love what?”
“Your family.”
“Is that all?”
She relaxed a bit and added, “And I love being with you.”
“I love being with you, too.”
“My closest friends know that we’ve been dating, but I’m not ready to be public beyond them and your family. It’s so much pressure. You know my parents will jump straight to wedding talk, and I can’t handle that.”
“I absolutely understand. I just need to make sure that I’m hearing you correctly. Is there an us?”
Liya replied without needing a moment to consider the implications of her answer, “Yes. There is definitely an us.”
I brushed featherlight kisses across her jaw. Maybe it was the few drinks I’d had earlier. Or the many drinks I’d had since arriving at this club. Or maybe it was simply the intoxicating allure of Liya. But her words made my heart beat like never before. They made my skin tingle. They made my gentle kisses turn passionate and consuming.
She gasped as she gripped my shoulder. “You should stop,” she said and pulled away.
“Why?” I moaned.
“Because anyone can open the curtains and walk in. All the food and drinks are here. Someone will be coming back any second.”
“Right…”
She took a long drink of champagne, shimmied out of the booth, and looked down at me, offering a hand. “Come on. Dance with me? Maybe I’ll let you take me home tonight.”
As fast as she moved through these drinks, I had every intention of making sure she got home safely.
What I hadn’t planned on? Sleeping over.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Liya
I woke up to one of the worst headaches in history, the kind that had me seeing double. Even the slightest chirping outside transformed the room into the inside of a war drum. Nausea rolled around in my gut, and everything hurt.
Oh, no, how much did I drink during the club phase of Reema’s bachelorette party?
The clock glinted eleven in the morning. The sunlight tried to pry through the closed blinds. Rolling over, I found a glass of
chilled water. Beads of moisture skittered down the sides, and a puddle edged toward a bottle of ibuprofen. Strange. I gulped three pills with water and threw the covers off, suddenly cold from lack of clothing.
Sluggishly tumbling out of bed, my hair all over the place, my joints aching, my face sticky, I wandered around my dresser and pulled on cotton shorts and a tank top. Glancing at the mirror, I smoothed down a wild nest of stiff waves and wiped raccoon eyes. I needed a shower.
As soon as I swung back the bedroom door, a whiff of ginger cha and bataka pooha hit my senses. For a second, I thought I was still in high school, at my parents’ house, and Momma had made breakfast. I didn’t see a lean woman scrubbing away in the kitchen, but the broad shoulders of a man working over a wok.
“What are you doing here?” I flinched and touched my forehead. Ugh. Why was my voice so loud?
“Morning,” he said, his voice hoarse.
“How did you get in here?”
Jay turned to me and dished up spicy potatoes and flattened rice and then sprinkled chopped cilantro and a squeeze of lime on top. “Don’t you remember last night?”
I looked over my shoulder at my bedroom. He must’ve left the water and pills on my bedside table. “Did we…?”
“No.”
Slowly, pieces of last night floated together. My annoyance levels had reached an all-time high with the aunties last night, and I compensated by having too many drinks at the club. Jay must’ve brought me home. I licked dry lips. I made a sharp turn toward the bathroom. I had to pee and wash my face and brush my teeth and pull back this mess of hair before I could talk to him.
I re-emerged and asked, “We didn’t do anything last night?”
He pushed out a bowl of bataka pooha with a dollop of mango chutney and a cup of cha. “I brought you home and you passed out. Hope it’s okay that I slept on the couch.”
“Oh. Yes, of course. Thank you.” I pulled out a barstool across the kitchen counter from him, sorely embarrassed for what drunk me might’ve done last night. I spooned a flavorful bite into my mouth.