A Special Kind of Different

by Holly Jacobs

  Anna led her mother into the living room and they both sat down on the couch. “Now, what happened to Herbert, Mom?”

  “No, not Herbert, Moose.”

  “Moose?” Anna wasn’t sure she’d heard about Moose.

  “Herbert and I broke up weeks ago at the bar, but I met Moose that same night, and I thought I’d finally found the one. My one. A happily-ever-after sort of man.”

  Anna wasn’t sure that a man named Moose sounded like a happily-ever-after sort of man, but maybe she was prejudiced against men named after animals. She was pretty sure she’d feel the same about a man named Wolf, Horse or Hippo. How about Buck? Would a guy named Buck stick around? She didn’t think so.

  She realized her mother was waiting for some kind of response. “I’m sorry, Mom.” And she was. She was sorry her mother put herself through this time after time.

  “I really thought he was it,” her mother whispered.

  “Really sorry, Mom.”

  “I know you are, baby.” Her mother reached for the box of tissues that only came out when she visited after a break-up or when Anna had a cold.

  “Maybe we could get a chick flick and watch it tonight?” her mom asked, the tissue covering the lower half of her face.

  “I’ve got a date, remember?”

  Her mom blew her nose, then smiled. “That’s right. Tell me all about him.”

  “It’s a first date. No ever-afters in sight. Only two people eating dinner together.”

  “Oh, a first date. I love first dates. They’re so full of potential. You spend time talking and getting to know each other.” Her mother sighed. “I really do love first dates. And I’ll probably never have one again. Moose was it for me. I’m done. I’ll never find my happily-ever-after now.”

  As much as Anna wanted to assure her mother there was no such thing as a happily-ever-after, that if people were really lucky, sometimes they found a happily-right-now, she stared at her mom. Yes, people might say they looked alike, but Anna’s mom was a dreamer. And Anna? She was a realist. She believed in what was here, right now, right in front of her. She didn’t rule out falling in love, but she wasn’t sure she bought the idea of a soul mate.

  “Mom, you know you’re not done looking. You believe in your soul mate too much to do that.”

  “And you, my little Anna, don’t.”

  Her mother stopped crying and she could almost see her mulling over ways to convince Anna there was such a thing as true love.

  “No, I don’t believe in soul mates,” she said gently. “So how about if you dream for both of us?”

  “Maybe you should dream a bit. Maybe tonight’s first date is the first of many? The start of a lifetime together?”

  “Tell you what, if you promise not to sit around at home and mope, then I’ll promise to try to dream, at least a little, tonight.”

  “Well, there is a dance at the club tonight.” Her mother paused, then laughed. It was a slight, tinkling sort of sound that once again held a belief that anything was possible.

  Anna laughed along with her, because she loved her mother. Oh, her mom drove her crazy, and her quest for one magical relationship that would make her whole always made Anna think of Don Quixote battling windmills. But the truth of it was, Anna appreciated that her mother fell so wholeheartedly into things.

  “The dance at the club sounds perfect,” Anna said. “Don’t stay out so late that you can’t get up for work tomorrow.”

  “Oh, about that.” Her mother waved her hand. “I have a new job. No more weekends for me.”

  Anna couldn’t help it, she laughed again. Her mother held on to her jobs only a little longer than she held on to her men. “So where do you work now?”

  “Near Keller’s Market. They put in that new cafeteria. I’m waiting tables and working the register. It’s good money, and it’s weekdays.”

  “I’m happy for you, Mom.”

  “Thanks, sweetie.” Her mom leaned forward and kissed her forehead. “Now, I’d best let you get ready for that date. Thanks for rescuing me from the depths of my despair.”

  “I don’t think Moose was worth any real despair.”

  Her mother, only minutes ago in tears at the thought of losing Moose, laughed again. “You’re right. There are other fish in the sea, aren’t there?”

  “Yes. And there are plenty of moose in the forest.” Oh, that was bad. Anna knew it was, but she grinned regardless.

  “Why, Antonia Mary Chapel, was that a joke? My oh-so-serious daughter is teasing me and joking?”

  She thought of Colm. “Well, I’ve been hanging out with this very funny guy lately.”

  “Maybe I should stay a bit longer so you can tell me all about him?” Her mother studied her. “Is this Mr. Date tonight?”

  “No, I’m not dating Mr. Funny Guy. I’ll tell you all about my date later. Right now, you should go get ready for the dance and let me get ready for the date.”

  “The first date.” Her mother sighed another wistful sigh.

  Anna nodded, wishing she felt better about it. Dating a client’s brother wasn’t very smart to begin with. She wasn’t sure why she’d said yes.

  “I hope it’s great, honey.” Her mom gave her a kiss on the cheek and departed.

  Anna quickly took a shower, tried to tame her crazy hair and finally admitted defeat and threw it into a twist. It looked semi-neat for a few seconds, then one of the millions of curls sprang free. She told herself that a slightly messy look was in vogue, though she didn’t believe her own lie. She slipped on the ice-blue dress and a pair of heels.

  Then waited.

  And waited.

  She checked the clock and realized that she hadn’t waited long, but time seemed to be moving at a different speed. Slower.

  Ten minutes after six, the doorbell rang and she felt an overwhelming sense of relief. He hadn’t stood her up.

  Not that she’d really thought he would. Still, given the odd sense of nerves she had over this date she hadn’t been sure.

  Anna swung the door open. Liam and Colm were both there.

  “Hi, Anna! Aunt Betty got sick and so she couldn’t come, and so I’m going to date you, too. Liam wanted to go to some fancy restaurant. I wanna go to Sara’s at the beach. They got good burgers there. But Liam says you get to pick, so what d’ya think? Burgers at Sara’s?” he wheedled.

  Liam shot her a look of apology. But rather than feeling disappointed, Anna felt relieved. She knew how to interact with Liam and Colm, but with Liam on her own, she’d felt unsure and nervous.

  She grinned. “Sara’s sounds perfect. And afterward, maybe we could take a walk on the beach. But I should go change.”

  Colm gave her an appraising look and frowned. “Yeah, you hurry and change. You look weird in a dress.”

  “She looks lovely,” Liam said quietly.

  Again, Anna could see the apology in his eyes, and reached out and gave his hand a squeeze to say it was fine.

  “Just a minute and I’ll be right back.”

  “I’ll count,” Colm said helpfully, “and see how long it takes you. One. Two…”

  Anna laughed because Colm looked so earnest and Liam looked so chagrined. “I’m hurrying,” she said for Colm’s sake, and added for Liam’s, “This is going to be fun.”

  She wasted no time changing into a pair of khaki capris and a T-shirt. Pulling the shirt over her head loosened the bun, so she pulled her curls into a ponytail. The wind at the beach would wreak havoc on her hair.

  She slipped on her sandals and hurried back into the living room.

  “I ran out of numbers,” Colm said. “That means you was way slow.”

  “Hey, bud, a gentleman never comments on how long a lady takes to get ready. Even if she is way slow,” Liam teased.

  Anna enjoyed this playful Liam. Despite the change in plans, she was looking forward to the evening.

  LIAM WASN’T the least bit surprised that Anna took
Colm coming along on the date so well.

  The drive into Erie had gone faster than it normally did. Of course, there were moments when he felt more like a referee than a date. Like over Colm and Anna’s mock-squabble about who rode shotgun. Liam declared that dates always won, and they’d both laughed.

  That seemed to be the theme of the time they spent with Anna. Laughter.

  She had already taught Colm so much, and she did it with kindness, humor and an undercurrent of joy.

  Sara’s burgers were out of this world, and Liam commented on the fact that he’d never seen any one person eat as many French fries as Colm had managed to.

  To which his brother responded, “I always got room for fries.”

  After dinner, they had ice cream cones. Then Liam parked at the Stull Center, and they ate their ice cream as they walked up the beach. Colm darted in and out of the waves, searching for beach glass.

  “I’m sorry about the date,” Liam said. “This isn’t what I planned. Although I had planned on a walk on the beach to watch the sunset. But I thought we’d start with a nice dinner at Joe Root’s.”

  “Life is never quite what we plan, but sometimes those unexpected paths are even better than the ones we’d intended to take.”

  “You’re a philosopher, Anna Chapel.”

  She shook her head. “No, I’m a realist.”

  “You can tell yourself that, if it makes you happy, but you are so much more. In fact, you’re a dreamer.”

  “My mother and I were discussing that earlier. She’s the dreamer. She always believes there’s something wonderful around the next corner. I try to concentrate on what I have in front of me. But tonight, she wanted me to dream a bit, too, so maybe that’s what you’re sensing.”

  “You don’t think you’re a dreamer?” Liam could see that she didn’t. That in all sincerity Anna believed what she believed. “I hate to break it to you, Anna Chapel, but you are the Don Quixote of dreams.”

  She pointed up the beach at the small windmill by the Stull Center. “When I was talking to Mom I made that same comparison…she’s Don Quixote. I’m Aldonza. I see things the way they are. No tilting windmills for me. The one over here is as close as I come.”

  “You can tell yourself that, but I know the truth. You saw in Colm so much more potential than I ever did. You didn’t accept the status quo. You—”

  “I think we need to change the subject,” she said, her discomfort evident.

  “Hey, Anna, look at this one.” Colm thrust a piece of beach glass into her hand.

  She held it up and admired it. “It’s beautiful, Colm.” She tried to hand it back.

  “Nah, it’s for you,” he said as he darted to the shoreline.

  She turned the glass over in her hand.

  “You don’t like hearing praise, do you?” Liam asked.

  “I like action, not words. Speaking of action, I’ve got to meet with the zoning board on Monday and I’m not sure if I can make my afternoon session with Colm. Is it a problem if I come late?”

  “Anna, you’re welcome whenever you want.” They continued their stroll, and he asked, “So, what’s the zoning thing about?”

  “Sunrise bought a house. We’ve got two other group homes in Whedon, and this will be our third. But we need it rezoned to allow a group home. Whedon has a statute on the books that says no more than two unrelated people can live together in a residential house.”

  They sat on a giant driftwood log as Colm continued his beach-glass hunt and the sun started to set. Anna resumed talking about zoning and group homes.

  Liam’s hand rested on the log a fraction of an inch from hers and slowly, he moved it until his pinkie touched hers. It was the smallest of gestures, but he liked it. As he listened to Anna and she told him about the plans Sunrise had for the house—her plans for it—Liam knew he was right. She was lying to herself when she said she was a realist.

  Whether or not she really knew it, Anna Chapel was a dreamer of the nth degree.

  And for the first time in a long time, Liam felt himself begin to dream a little, and that dream included Anna Chapel.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  “WHAT’RE WE DOIN’ today, Anna?” Colm asked on a Thursday morning two weeks after Anna’s almost-solo date with Liam.

  Since then, they’d gone out to two more dinners and a movie. It felt normal to have Colm come along. Some women might protest, but to Anna, Colm was such a big part of Liam’s life and hers that it seemed right.

  “I thought we’d take lunch to Liam. He has a meeting downtown and we could join him afterward.”

  “Are we gonna buy it? Maybe at Macky’s? They got good burgers there. And really good fries. I like fries. With lots of ketchup,” he told her.

  Anna knew a not-so subtle hint when she heard one, but today’s excursion wasn’t only a chance for her to see Liam. It was another lesson for Colm. At least if she made it a lesson for Colm, she could rationalize her growing need to see Liam. “I thought it might be more special if you made it. We could eat in the park.”

  It was a beautiful May day. Warm and sunny. Western Pennsylvania’s winters were long, and early springs were soggy. Today was the kind of day everyone dreamed of in January.

  “The park is nice. And Liam’d probably think it was real good if I cooked it. What should I make?”

  “I thought we’d try egg salad. So, first, you’ve got to boil some eggs. Let’s start by filling a pan with water…”

  Anna talked Colm through hard-boiled eggs, and after he had finished the egg salad and put it in the fridge to cool, she helped him bake brownies. While the brownies were in the oven, they cut some carrot sticks and talked about good nutrition.

  It was eleven-thirty when Colm had packed a bag with their lunch. “Okay, Anna, let’s go. I got shotgun, ’cause you’re driving.”

  “Let’s try something else. Today, let’s ride a bus.”

  “A bus?”

  She nodded as they walked toward the nearest bus stop. Whedon was so small, it only had two routes for the entire community. And there was a bus that ran into Erie three times a day.

  Learning to use public transportation was an important part of Colm’s independence. If he could get around town, he could get a job, and someday maybe live on his own.

  And in Anna’s mind, equipping Colm to live independently, in a house like the Trudy Street one she’d bought for Sunrise recently, was her goal.

  Actually, Gilly and Josh, two of the three intended residents of Trudy Street, would be a nice fit for Colm. She’d been discussing the third resident with Ceelie, but they hadn’t made up their minds.

  Could Colm be ready for a house of his own this year?

  Anna never broached the idea with Liam of Colm moving into a group home someday, mainly because they’d been getting along so well and she didn’t want to upset the status quo. It was cowardly, and she knew it. She vowed that she’d talk to Liam about it soon.

  But for now, they were going to meet him for lunch.

  “You need to find one of the bus stops…”

  She gave Colm a 101 on the bus system as they waited at the stop. She handed him the proper change. “Now, when the bus driver opens the door, we’ll get on and you’ll put the money in the little box.”

  “All by myself, right, Anna?” he checked.

  “Right, Colm.”

  “Liam’s gonna be so surprised that we’re bringin’ him lunch and that I rode a bus. I never rode a bus before, except for school, and I didn’t have to pay for that. The bus driver, he’d open the door and say ‘Hi, Colm’ and I’d always try to sit at the front, ’cause if I sat in the back sometimes kids picked on me. I didn’t care ’cause Mommy always said sticks and stones can break your bones but names can never hurt you. But Liam, he cared. He beat some guys up once ’cause they called me a bad name. He got kicked off the bus for a long time, and Mommy drove us to school, but then they let us on again and we rode the bu
s, and I went back to sitting in the front ’cause the bus driver didn’t let those kids call me names and he didn’t need to beat them up. That’s good, ’cause if the bus driver got kicked off, who’d drive the bus?” Colm laughed at his question.

  Anna smiled along with him, but inside, her heart was breaking. And not only for Colm, who had to deal with people who called him names, but for Liam, who’d been kicked off the bus for defending his brother.

  She wondered how many fights Liam had been in over the years on Colm’s behalf?

  “Hey, Anna, you’re not gonna fight anyone if they call me names, right? ’Cause I don’t want you to get a black eye like Liam did. Only it wasn’t black. It was kinda purple, then turned green, so I don’t know why you call it a black eye, but you do.”

  “No, Colm, I’m not going to get a black eye. If someone calls you a name, I’ll feel sorry for them because I’ll know that their hearts are way too tiny and that must hurt.”

  “Do ya think I got a tiny heart?” He thumped his own chest. “’Cause it don’t hurt, except when Liam’s sad because of me, or when Mommy and Daddy died.”

  “Colm, I’m not a doctor, but I can guarantee, you’ve got one of the biggest hearts in the whole world.”

  He enveloped her in one of his spontaneous hugs. “I love you, Anna.”

  She hugged him back. “And I love you, Colm.”

  The bus pulled up and Colm got excited about dropping his money in the box. He enjoyed it so much, he put hers in, too. He took the seat right behind the driver. “Just in case someone’s mean. I don’t want ya to get in a fight.”

  “I promise I won’t get in a fight, but I’ll never let someone be mean to you. Someday, maybe you’ll be by yourself, and if someone picks on you, you should—”

  Colm didn’t hear the part about someone picking on him. He honed immediately in on the other part. “D’ya think someday I can ride a bus by myself? I rode the school bus by myself once when Liam was sick, but it got me at the driveway and only ever went to school. That was a real long time ago. But this bus stops lots of places and maybe I’d get lost.”