The Reckless Afterlife of Harriet Stoker

by Lauren James

  Leah rushed to add, “It won’t happen immediately. That kind of thing takes a while. But it will build up, over time.”

  Kasper looked resigned. “You’re right. It’s changed everything. I can’t trust my own judgement any more. I don’t know if I’m making the right decisions. If—” He looked at Felix, and cut himself off suddenly.

  Felix froze. “If what?”

  No one spoke. Rima coughed, in the way she did when she was suddenly feeling very awkward.

  “Oh God.” Felix’s voice was higher than it had been a moment ago. “This is why you kissed me, isn’t it?”

  Kasper rubbed the back of his neck, staring at the ground. Acid rose in Felix’s throat. Kasper had been desperately avoiding confronting his feelings for Felix for twenty-five years. Of course he would only ever give in when he’d lost his fear. When he had nothing inside him, monitoring his behaviour.

  “You only kissed me because you’d lost your fear,” Felix said, the realization hitting him like a hammer to the head. “Do you – do you even want to be with me? Or was it just – a bad decision?”

  Rima and Leah turned away, giving them a moment of privacy. When Kasper reached for him, he backed away. His entire chest was collapsing.

  “Tell me,” Felix said.

  “I – I don’t know,” Kasper admitted, against his will. “I’ve been asking myself the same question. I’m sorry. It all happened so fast.”

  Felix shuddered. “How did I not see?”

  “Felix…” Kasper said, looking guilty. “It’s OK.”

  “I don’t think you’re qualified to decide what is and isn’t OK right now!” Felix tipped forwards, burying his head in his hands. The implications of this kept rolling over him in waves, until he was drowning. “I’ve taken advantage of you. That’s basically what this means. You aren’t in a position to give consent right now. And I –” he stumbled to his feet – “I need a minute.”

  He walked blindly down the tunnel and sank to his knees, pressing his forehead against the brick. It was over, then. His biggest dream had come true for the grand total of an hour. And then it had been shattered.

  Kasper was never going to be able to do this. Not in a way that Felix would allow. He’d never know if Kasper really wanted it, or if it was just the easiest path to take.

  Kasper had said he didn’t feel nerves or anticipation any more. Was it even possible for him to fall in love, without those things? What was love, if not the small moments of humanity and vulnerability that came along with trusting someone to catch you, when you fell for them? If Kasper never felt any of that, then any relationship they built wouldn’t mean a thing.

  He couldn’t have him. Ever. However much Kasper insisted that he was fine.

  He let himself cry. Even now, he knew that Kasper wasn’t worried about any of this. It was like his pain was doubled, with Felix feeling it for them both.

  Eventually, his crying stopped feeling real and became self-indulgent and selfish. What was he doing, sobbing over a single kiss when ghosts were being destroyed above them?

  He had to forget this had ever happened, shrug off this pity party and destroy the men who had done this to Kasper.

  He stood up, realizing awkwardly that the medieval lady ghost had been watching him this whole time.

  “Lovely day, isn’t it?” he said inanely, then winced. Lovely day? She lived alone. Underground. Next to her own skeleton. And didn’t speak English.

  He hurried back to the others, who all stopped talking as he approached. Kasper was frowning, but it looked artificial, like he was forcing his forehead into a frown to make Felix feel less embarrassed about the whole crying thing.

  “I’m ready.” Felix looked away from Kasper. “So how are we going to end this?”

  HARRIET

  Harriet wrapped her scarf around her neck over and over again, until the stiff fabric propped up the weight of her head. As long as she stared straight ahead, and didn’t make any sudden movements, it was only mildly excruciatingly painful.

  She was still weak, even if she wasn’t in danger of becoming a Shell any more. As her energy levels stabilized at a safe amount, her mind was starting to heal from the damage it had taken while holding all that stolen energy inside herself. She could think properly for the first time in days.

  She’d turned into someone she didn’t recognize. The memory of Oscar’s dying moments haunted her. His eyes had just gone dark and empty, staring desperately at nothing as he tried to work out what was happening to him.

  What had she been thinking? None of that had been her – it had been the powers inside her, burning out her mind.

  She’d acted mindlessly, following her instincts without considering who she would hurt along the way. She had condemned people – the Shells, Qi, Oscar, Jonny, Greg, the squash student. So many lives, gone because of her.

  That was never, ever happening again. Perhaps her gran had done her a favour by taking the extra energy away. She had been so close to turning into a monster, just like Norma.

  In the meantime, she was going to stick close to the Tricksters. Harriet was too vulnerable to fight right now. Norma had multiple stolen powers, including whatever her own turned out to be. She was probably unconscious somewhere from her overdose, but there was a chance she was on the prowl already. Harriet needed allies to survive, and Rufus and Vini were the strongest people here.

  Harriet followed in their wake, as the Tricksters’ army rampaged through Mulcture Hall. At first, she’d been certain that this was just a celebration of their freedom, after years in the basement. Surely they’d rein everyone in, once the excitement had worn off? The Tricksters wouldn’t let their army kill every ghost in the building, would they?

  But it carried on, and on, and on. They were planning to destroy everyone in their path. Harriet could barely watch. What if they came across Rima? Felix? Kasper? She couldn’t stand knowing that she’d been the death of any of them, even after all their fighting. There was a part of her, buried deep, that still wanted to be friends with them.

  When they reached the roof of the building, Rufus breathed in deeply, knocking his fist against his chest. “Ah, fresh air. It’s been a while since we were last allowed outside.”

  Vini spat out a chunk of gristle. “Smells like petrol out here. That’s new. The humans really are destroying the sky, then.”

  “There’s no escape route up here,” Harriet said, looking around for Norma. “We should go somewhere safer.”

  Rufus smiled. “Don’t worry, we’ll protect you. In the meantime, keep an eye out for those friends of yours. You should kill them on sight – except for Leah and the child. Only we’re allowed to deal with them.”

  Harriet was surprised. What did they want with Leah and Claudia? The thought of killing any of them sent a pulse of revulsion through her.

  Vini laughed, seeing the disgust on her face. “She’s not going to do it, I can tell. Having regrets already, are you? I thought you had bloodlust in your bones.”

  “I’m not interested in torturing every ghost I pass, that’s all,” she spat. “But I can still stand up for myself.”

  How had she ended up here, rather than with good, kind people like Rima? Harriet hadn’t realized what a precious gift she’d been given, when they’d offered her their friendship. It had been instinct to reject them, before they could reject her first. She’d been pushing people away her whole life. If she didn’t have anyone, then she couldn’t lose them. After her parents had died, it had been safer to think that she only needed her grandmother, that it was the two of them against the world. Look how well that had turned out.

  She saw every conversation she’d had with Norma in a new light now. Norma had isolated Harriet, making her dependent on their home life, telling her to stay away from other people, who would use her for their own interests.

  Her gran abused her. She’d been denying it for years. Harriet had been fixated on her gran, not because she loved her, but because she was afra
id of her – and even more terrified of ending up like her.

  If her life didn’t revolve around constantly negotiating her gran’s feelings, then who was she? She’d never even had the chance to find out.

  Leah, Rima, Felix and Kasper were lucky to be together. That was what she wanted now, more than anything. Friends. People she could trust to guide her into doing what was right. To back her up when she couldn’t manage on her own.

  “Where are they, then?” Vini asked Rufus. “We’ve looked everywhere.”

  “Who are you looking for?” Harriet asked.

  “Someone important. Someone we’ve been waiting to see for a long time.”

  Harriet guessed that they wanted to see Leah, if they’d told Harriet not to kill her. What could possibly be so urgent that they needed to see her as soon as they left the basement?

  Rufus tilted his head and sniffed the air. “Do you know, Harriet – I think that someone might be here now.”

  He gestured behind her. A figure was striding across the rooftop, glowing bright with energy, white hair blowing in the wind.

  It was her grandmother.

  “That’s my gran!” Harriet hissed, skittering back behind Vini. “She’s dangerous. You can’t let her get near! Do something, please!” Her heart was going to beat out of her chest. But Rufus and Vini could take her on. They were both bright with energy, too. It would be easy, for the two of them.

  Rufus surged forwards towards Norma, arms outstretched to seize her and tear her apart. Harriet gasped, bracing for the sight of her gran being torn limb from limb.

  Instead, Rufus brought his arms around Norma and … hugged her.

  Chapter 24

  HARRIET

  “Brother!” Norma said, and kissed Rufus on the cheeks, one after the other. He beamed so widely that he developed dimples.

  Harriet was too stunned to even react. Brother?

  Vini wrapped his arm around Norma’s shoulders, laughing out loud in joy. “Oh, it’s good to see you!” He giggled – actually, full-on giggled.

  Norma rubbed his hair, clapping Rufus on the back. “You’ve both been keeping well without me, I see!”

  She seemed to be completely ignoring Harriet, who was standing behind the Tricksters.

  “It hasn’t been the same,” Rufus said. “But you’re here again now. That’s all behind us.”

  “It is. I want this place back under control as soon as possible, do you understand? After we’ve dealt with the child.”

  “We haven’t seen them yet!” Vini said. “We thought you’d want us to wait for you, anyway.”

  Harriet gaped at them, her deep fear replaced by pure curiosity.

  “You did well, brothers,” Norma said. “Rufus, do you have anything to report?”

  “A few things.” Rufus fell into step beside Norma like an obedient servant. He updated her on the number of ghosts in the building, as well as the last place that Leah and Claudia had been seen.

  Harriet had never imagined he would give up control. Why was he treating her grandmother like his long-lost leader, totally calm and submissive?

  “Vini, what’s going on?” she whispered.

  Vini wrapped an arm around Harriet’s shoulders. He was gazing at Norma in worship. “That’s our brother, Fabian! We’ve been waiting for him. He promised he’d be back, and I didn’t believe him. But here he is, after all this time!”

  “No, that’s my grandmother,” Harriet hissed. “Not a man. How can she be your brother?”

  “He brought himself back. He made sure he was reborn after he disintegrated. He’s home, at last! After eighty years!”

  Her grandmother had been here with the Tricksters before? She’d been a ghost before? It must be a trick. But it made sense, in a way that Harriet couldn’t explain. Norma had known an impossible amount about ghost powers from the very moment she’d died. Was that because she had been doing this for a long time, as one of the Tricksters?

  Harriet froze under Vini’s touch, unable to process what this meant. Was this why her gran had attacked her, and taken all her powers? Had she been trying to grow strong enough to rejoin her old brothers?

  “Does this mean we’re…?”

  “Related!” Vini said. “Didn’t you wonder why we’ve been helping you so much? You’re family!”

  Harriet grimaced, feeling a twinge in the remains of her eyelid. Rufus had said the same thing to her earlier, but she’d thought he was joking. If this was how they treated family, she didn’t want to see how they dealt with everyone else. Her eyes latched on to Vini’s torn earlobe.

  “I see you’ve met your great-uncles,” Norma said, and held out her arms to Harriet. “Come here, dear. Let’s make up, shall we? Family needs to stick together. And there’s a lot we need to do to get this place shipshape again. It’s become very disorganized in my absence.”

  “What?” Harriet spluttered.

  “Join us,” Norma said. “Together, the four of us can take control of this building. All the other ghosts will be our servants, if they want to survive. We’ll have a huge supply of batteries to feed on whenever our energy runs low. We’d never become Shells or disintegrate. With the four of us ruling, we’ll live for ever in total domination. Together.”

  Vini started clapping. Rufus was crying.

  Norma smiled lovingly at them. “Harriet, you’ve been leading a very reckless afterlife so far, but you’re going to behave yourself from now on. Aren’t you?”

  “I don’t understand who you are. Are you Norma? Or are you…?”

  “Fabian,” Norma finished. “I’m both. I didn’t remember any of my time as Fabian. Not until we came to the university for an open day last spring, do you remember? We walked past this building on a tour, before we went to see the library. I got this sense of déjà vu. I knew I’d been here before, and this used to be a hugely important place for me. My mind opened up and I remembered everything. It was like turning a key. It unlocked all the information I’d kept safe inside myself.”

  Rufus and Vini were listening carefully. They must not have heard any of this, either.

  “Do you think your old power made it possible?” Rufus asked. “You’ve always been able to manipulate memories. Did that help you remember?”

  Norma nodded. “I think so. When I first became a ghost, I started testing the limits of my power to control my own memories. I managed to train myself to remember who I was, just in case I could come back in a new body. It worked. As soon as I saw this building, my brain knew what to do. If I’d never come to Mulcture Hall, I might have died without knowing who I really am.”

  “No one else could do what you did, brother,” Vini said, bursting with pride. “You’ve changed history. You’re a genius!”

  Norma smiled, her wrinkled cheeks creasing with pleasure. “Oh, you young fool. Stop it.” She rubbed her knuckle against his cheek affectionately. Vini leaned into it, like a touch-starved kitten.

  They loved her. Both of them really and truly loved Norma, in a way that Harriet never had. They adored her – him? – to the depths of their souls. Somehow, they saw Norma as someone good and admirable and worthy of love. They’d grieved her for eighty years, and patiently waited for her to come back. Just because she’d said she would. They’d trusted her implicitly.

  How could it be possible?

  “So when you killed my parents, you didn’t know that you were Fabian?”

  Norma’s smile dropped. “Still caught up on that, are you? Do let it go, Harriet – we have a lot to be getting on with. You should feel lucky that it wasn’t you, too.”

  Harriet flinched – Norma really didn’t regret a thing.

  “But I suppose it was all Norma,” her gran continued. “I had no idea I had ever been anyone else when I killed your parents.” She smirked at Rufus. “I guess it was natural talent.”

  “You’ve always been precocious!” Rufus said. “Barely seventy years old and you were already taking the initiative. So admirable!”

 
; Harriet rubbed her eyes. How was any of this real? Could this be happening? “You just … killed them, then? There was no special ghostly reason for that?”

  Norma waved her hand airily. “It was a long time ago. If I’d known that ghosts existed, I would hardly have killed them in some little house in the suburbs of Coventry. What use is that? They’re still stuck there on their own. I’d have put them somewhere they could have been useful. I killed them because it had reached the point where they were refusing to do what I said any more. They had to go. They were taking you away from me, Harriet. You’re the only one of them who listened to me. My little protégée.”

  Harriet blanched, acid rising in her throat. So she was just easily influenced? She’d been indoctrinated since she was a child.

  “Tell us what happened after your real memories came back,” Rufus said.

  Norma patted his hand, which rested on her arm. “Well, I remembered how strong and powerful I’d been here, ruling unchallenged for so many centuries. After that, I couldn’t be happy any longer in this body.” Norma gestured down at herself. “I was frail and weak, disrespected and ignored. I wanted – needed – to be my old self again, reunited with my dear brothers. Even if that meant becoming a ghost.”

  Harriet had been so upset when Norma died. It had seemed such a pointless accident, just tripping and hitting her head. Was she saying that it wasn’t an accident at all? “You committed suicide?” Harriet gasped.

  Norma sniffed. “I don’t like that word.”

  “But you killed yourself? You hit your head like that on purpose?”

  “Well, yes. I wanted to be back with you all! My loved ones!” When she held out her arms, Vini tucked himself under her armpit and squeezed her waist. “Now we can all be together for ever. A family again,” Norma said, in satisfaction.

  This wasn’t right. Norma wasn’t telling them the whole story. If Norma had planned to kill herself here, then it must have been a huge surprise to find out that Harriet had died here only days beforehand.

  Unless…

  Now she thought about it, Norma had been the one who suggested that Harriet come to Mulcture Hall to take photographs of the abandoned building in the first place. Otherwise, it would never have occurred to her.