Watching her up there laughing, smiling, I couldn’t handle it for another second. My escape was stopped by someone grabbing my elbow in the lobby. My heart skipped a beat, thinking it might be Ava, but it wasn’t.
Sydney had her hair curled around her face, which was caked with makeup. Her tiny, pink dress hugged all her curves a little too tight and stopped barely below her ass. Eyes bright with excitement, her overly glossed lips curved into a smile. “I didn’t think you were coming.” She squeezed my arm tightly, as if she thought I might run away, which I seriously considered.
“Yeah, I, uh, I got the time off,” I stammered a little, trying to recover some dignity.
With her head tilted, her grin grew wider to the point of me being able to see all her gums. “Did you change your mind about the party too?”
Ugh, I completely forgot about it. It was definitely the sort of thing I would have gone to were I back in Seattle, but I was trying to be different here. The only lure was Ava not being there. There was no way she would go to something like that—she was too good. I could go. I could be stupid for one night to dull the pain a little.
“C’mon, Cade,” she urged, her bottom lip sticking out while she brushed a hand up and down my arm. “It will be a lot of fun.”
With a sigh, I rubbed a hand over my face. It was unlikely it would be any amount of fun, but not being a hermit on a Friday night wouldn’t kill me. The auditorium began to empty into the lobby while I contemplated going. There was no good reason not to.
“Okay,” I gave in. “But only for a little bit. I have stuff to do in the morning.”
“Yay,” she squealed before towing me out the lobby doors.
Her knowing exactly where my car was weirded me out a little, but I brushed it off. We drove in silence for the first bit, mostly because I blasted AFI. Talking was not appealing—really the party wasn’t either. But there was a girl I couldn’t get off my mind, no matter how bad I wanted to. Needed to.
Sydney fidgeting in her seat made me realize I was being an ass. She wasn’t being as forward as she had been the last time I drove her, and I was still being a dick. If I was going to move on, I could at least be decent, maybe even friendly, to a pretty girl who was into me.
After turning the music down, I cleared my throat. “Are you hungry?” I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye. “We could stop to get something. It’s still kind of early.”
“Yeah, that sounds great.” She nodded vigorously, beaming with excitement.
“Anything in particular you want?”
“No, I’ll eat whatever.”
I nodded, turning the music back up a little. A cheap drive-thru seemed the perfect way to let her know it wasn’t an actual date. Her grimace confirmed she wasn’t impressed. After paying, I parked in the lot so we could eat in the car. While chattering about who would be at the party, she nibbled on her food. She got really excited about the band playing, saying they were on the radio station once. I wasn’t really listening, even though I was trying like hell to pay attention. I found myself checking my phone, as if expecting Ava to text me, or something. She didn’t notice, though. Go figure.
When we were done, it was almost ten, which still felt early for a party, but at least we wouldn’t be the first ones to arrive. The neighborhood was on the outer edge of Portland, and the house was easy to find since cars surrounded it. The place was huge and a little over the top, but it fit Kelsey. I parked around the corner, and we walked up to the house.
The music already blasting inside sounded vaguely familiar, but I didn’t think too hard on it. Sydney rang the bell, and the door swung open immediately. Kelsey greeted us in a tiny skirt and a tube top with a screech as she charged Sydney to give her a hug. After a lot of delighted squealing—more like migraine creating—she led us in.
Inside was all fancy furniture, chandeliers, and wall hangings. I was sure one of the light fixtures alone could have covered our mortgage bill for a few months. The sight of servers walking around with trays of drinks made me chuckle. It was unlike any kickback I had ever been to.
Sydney grabbed my hand, pulling me through the house to the main room where most everyone danced along to the band playing. Grace was at the mic, screaming her lungs out. “Let’s dance,” Sydney yelled over the music, after grabbing a drink from one of the walking trays.
The server offered me one, but I declined. My goal was not to get drunk or high, just to get out. “Actually, I’m gonna say hi to the band real quick,” I said in her ear, almost choking on her too-sweet perfume. Air humping in a crowded living room and calling it dancing seemed about as fun as eating glass. “You go ahead. I’ll come find you when I’m done.”
“Okay, but don’t go too far,” she yelled, before making a mad dash toward a group of writhing girls. The sight made me cringe.
Being told what to do rubbed me wrong, so I decided I would go as far as I’d like. I wasn’t going to say hi to the band, since the sight of Grace screaming into the microphone had a fresh image of Ava, leaning forward on a table, mouth hanging open in surprise, crowding my mind until I couldn’t see much else.
I toured the house, trying to think of anything but her, but it wasn’t working. Roaming through long hallways, crowded with bodies, didn’t help. Parties weren’t much my thing anymore—especially not when I only wanted to be hanging out with Ava. Hearing her laugh, seeing the sparkle in her stormy eyes whenever she cracked a sarcastic comment at anything and everything.
Going outside seemed like it could help clear my head, so I found the French doors off the kitchen that led out back. I didn’t look at much when I made my way over the grass toward the fancy Ramada. A bench off to the left was the only one not occupied by a steamy couple. With my elbows on my knees, my face in my hands, I wondered what the hell I was doing there. I didn’t belong there—it wasn’t going to help. Not one bit. I didn’t need to be at a party with a bunch of people I didn’t know.
My mind made up, I was about to get up when I noticed Sydney coming toward me. “I thought I told you not to go far.” She stuck her bottom lip out in her exaggerated pout, making me groan inwardly.
She stood right in front of me when I got up, rubbing a hand over my neck. “Yeah, um… I needed some air.” I cleared my throat when she shifted closer to me. The smell of fruity alcohol on her breath and her glassy eyes told me she probably had another drink before finding me. “Look, I think I’m going to get going.” I grabbed her shoulders to gently move her out of the way.
“But we just got here,” she whined before snaking her hands around my hips, pulling me closer. “Couldn’t you stay just a little longer?” She studied my lips from under her lashes while licking her own.
The invitation was obvious. I wasn’t an idiot. It heated my blood slightly, but nothing like the heat that pulsed through my veins just at the thought of kissing Ava. But it was there. She had nice tits and was hot—maybe the right mixture to forget Ava for a few hours. Maybe. I was shallow at times, so sue me.
Before I could make up my mind, she leaned in, pressing her sticky glossed lips to mine. She attacked my face, while maneuvering us so I was pressed against a column with her body plastered to mine. Her tongue tangled with mine, tasting of sweet alcohol and berry lip gloss.
It worked for a minute, fogging my mind with soft curves and lips pressed to mine. I trailed my hands up her back, tangling them in her mass of long hair. Trying to forget. But with my eyes closed, Ava overtook all my senses. Her soft lips. Her short curls in my hands. This wasn’t her… but I couldn’t have her.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Ava
By the time I finally decided I was going to the party, it had been going for a couple hours, but that was okay with me. Mom and Dad took me out to dinner after the show to my favorite Italian place. I told them I was going to meet some dance girls and I might stay the night with Kelsey. I was sure they knew what I was really up to, but they were cool and played along. Besides, I was eighteen, so I
was bound to get into some trouble. I was due a bit.
When I pulled up to the house, which was basically a mansion, I lost my nerve a little. I didn’t belong at a place like this. Even though I wasn’t the partying type, I had a purpose, and I was going to go through with it.
Cade had been at the concert. I knew he had. In the back of the auditorium during the bow. When we got offstage, I dashed to the lobby still in costume, looking for him, but he was gone. A couple girls in the dressing room said he would probably be going to the party. So there I was.
When I rang the bell, a buzzed Kelsey answered, yelling, “Ava! You came!” over the earsplitting music pouring from inside. Her cute skirt and tube top made me feel underdressed in my usual jeans, T-shirt, and Chucks.
With my hands squeezed together, I stared at her with popping eyes. Palms were slick with sweat, heart pounding. All the people inside, moving around with drinks, smoking, making out, was almost too much. Kelsey appeared to sense my nerves, since she grabbed my arm before pulling me in a rib-crushing hug and shoving me inside. I guess she had gotten over my craziness, or she didn’t care about it while drunk.
“Everyone is here,” she told me with a huge grin, as if having the entire school in her enormous house was a big accomplishment.
My arm was stuck in her grip while she dragged me through the entryway where the ceiling reached all the way to the second floor and a fancy-looking, crystal chandelier hung. Someone walked by with a tray of drinks, and she grabbed a pink one, giving the handsome server a sultry smile. She shoved the drink in my hand.
I shook my head to decline and tried to hand it back to her, but she only laughed. “You’ll need it to loosen up a bit. Besides, you can’t go to a party like this and not have a few drinks.”
With an eye roll, I shrugged before taking a sip of the drink. Flavor burst in my mouth, warmth flowing down my throat. I was afraid it would be awful, but the sweet pineapple juice mixed with a hint of vanilla and something pink made it amazing. “This is awesome,” I told her in shock, finally speaking.
“Of course it is.” She laughed again. “It’s pineapple upside-down cake. Once you’ve had a couple of those, you’ll be able to handle the stronger stuff.”
Sipping my drink helped me avoid saying anything stupid. Drinking hadn’t been part of my plan, but it wasn’t as hard or as gross as I thought it would be. In only a few seconds of walking with her toward the living room, I finished the drink and she handed me another with a knowing look.
“They’re pretty awesome, huh?” She raised her eyebrows, and I agreed with a smile. “All right, well, I have to go check on some things. You have fun tonight. There’s dancing in the living room, more drinks and food in the kitchen, and there’s seating outside if you want fresh air.”
“Thanks, Kelsey. For inviting me and… everything.”
“Of course!”
She took off in the other direction, talking to guests, being a dutiful host.
The fancy decorations, chandeliers, and furniture in every visible area were all overwhelming. It was unbelievable she would have a high school party in such a beautiful house, but maybe that was what made her popular. While walking through the front of the house, I switched my drink for a full one. It only took a few more seconds to down the third, since they tasted oh so good.
In the living area, a group of dance girls were bumping and grinding in the middle of the room with a bunch of guys panting after them. The furniture was moved out of the way, and the stereo blasted some awful rap I couldn’t even understand. It looked like the front of the room, next to the stereo, was set up for a band to be playing, but they were MIA.
A blue Mohawk bobbed through the crowd, moving in my direction. “Hey, Jake!” I yelled over the music.
“Ava!” he exclaimed, giving me a big hug as if we were old buddies.
With a laugh, I latched onto him. The alcohol was definitely bringing on some fuzzy feelings. “What are you doing here?” I asked while gaining my feet again, my voice slurring a bit.
“We’re playing. The girl throwing the party heard our interview on the radio station.”
“Cool.” I nodded, my smile fading when a dull pain ached in my chest at the thought of Cade. I had to find him. “Speaking of, have you seen Cade anywhere? I heard he might be here.”
“Yeah, I think I saw him somewhere.” He made a weird face I didn’t get, but quickly covered it with a smile. Or maybe I was seeing things. The buzz was pretty strong. “He needs to keep a better eye on you, before someone else scoops you up.” He winked. “I gotta go help the guys. We’re just taking a break right now. Maybe I’ll see you later.”
“Yeah, maybe.” I shrugged before he gave me another hug and walked off.
He had no idea how much his comment burned because Cade had tried to keep me. I was the idiot who pushed him away. Being scooped up by someone else wasn’t on the agenda—I only wanted Cade. While I walked on, I finished off my fourth drink. I had no idea how much alcohol was in them, but by the end of that one, I was pretty freaking tipsy. It was an uncomfortable feeling I wasn’t sure I liked. Not having complete control of my body and maybe being okay with doing something reckless was not a good combination. The liquid courage had stayed true to its name.
I was on a mission. Apologizing to Cade for the stupid fight and for pushing him away had to happen. I didn’t want him to stay away—I wanted to be with him. Even if things were complicated, I was sure we could figure it out. If the apology went well, I could lead in to the rest of my plan and hope for the best.
I moved down a hallway, not quite sure where I was going, but wanting to get away from the music. Multiple couples were pressed against the walls doing things they should have found a room for. The scents of sweat, booze, and something skunky made me nauseas. Getting away from all the bodies was a necessity.
I found myself in the kitchen, where there seemed to be even more people who were talking loudly, playing beer pong on the enormous, antique, kitchen table, or drinking out of beer bongs—all sights I had never seen in person before and I didn’t care to see again. Shoving through the crowd earned me some glares, but I had found the French doors that led to the back deck. With one of them open, a cool breeze along with a few drops of condensation hit me in the face. The sprinkling rain gave me high hopes it would clear my head.
Even with the drizzle, there was still a crowd of people outside. The back deck was huge, stretching along the entire backside of the house and reaching far out toward the lawn. There were multiple sets of matching patio furniture along it, then a set of gothic stairs in the middle that led to the lawn. The whole yard was decked out in hanging lights, which started at the roof of the porch and webbed out to the huge fence that closed the yard in. Light posts that looked like they were from old England were in the four corners of the yard. It was like a fairy tale.
Still woozy, I walked down the stairs—only stumbling slightly—to the fresh-cut grass. The cool raindrops sprinkling my face had me feeling instantly better. The grass squished beneath my shoes while I moved toward the back corner of the yard where a large, wooden Ramada took up space.
A few couples were going at it under there, but I didn’t mind. A nice bench was in my sights, which would be perfect to relax on. The Ramada wasn’t covered, so I would still be able to enjoy the rain and the rare sight of the stars, if the clouds parted.
Chapter Twenty-Six
This wonderful image was in my mind when I was only a few feet from the Ramada, and one of the couples caught my eye. They weren’t full-on going at it, as most of the others were, but they were getting there. The girl had the guy pressed against one of the posts with her body plastered to his.
What caught my eye were his hands in her hair—the same hands that had tangled in my own hair, accompanied by the same lips, the same tongue that had devoured mine. Heat swam through me, up my neck, and over my cheeks as vomit clawed at my throat. But I couldn’t stop staring. Maybe I hoped to see him shove
her off him, to yell at her or something, but neither happened. At least, not until she started kissing down his jaw and neck to his shoulder.
His dark eyes opened lazily, looking glazed over until they came to rest on me. They snapped wide open. I thought he cursed before shoving a shocked Sydney away, but I couldn’t be sure because my ears rang loud enough it hurt my eardrums. He started toward me, shaking Sydney’s grabby hands off his arm when she tried to stop him. I spun on my heel, meaning to rush back to the house, but I stumbled and swayed, which gave him the advantage.
“Ava, stop.” He grabbed my arm, more holding me up than anything else.
My mind fogged, stomach churning and pulse quickening all at the same time. “Don’t,” I fumed, trying to pull my arm from his grip. With my eyes scrunched shut, I tried to gain some semblance of control, but doing so only brought the image of them into my mind, making everything a thousand times worse. My eyes opened again, and I glared at his hand on my arm. “Let go of me,” I meant to growl, but it came out slurred, with none of the heat wanted.
“Cade, you shouldn’t even bother with her,” Sydney said behind him. With her arms crossed, she gave me an evil glare. Her kiss-swollen lips and tousled hair made me want to scratch her eyes out, or smack him. Either would make me feel better, I was sure of it. She moved next to him, putting a hand on his shoulder, her scowl turning to a devilish smile. “Why don’t we go find a room upstairs, where we can have some privacy?”
My arm remained in his grasp when he shook her hand off and flat-out ignored her. “Can we please talk for a minute?” he asked, his eyes shifting back and forth.
I wanted to say no, I wanted to say something, but everything swirled around me. I closed my eyes for another second, then opened them wide when acid tore at my throat again. Shaking my head, I jerked my arm from his grip and bolted for the house. A bathroom was an absolute necessity.
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