Mistletoe Kisses

by Anna B. Doe

  Evan hadn’t meant to make his wife cry this morning, but her tears were filled with gratitude. Then she whispered, “Eight protons.”

  “Eight neutrons,” he finished before AJ kissed him.

  He thought back to that first kiss by her window for her birthday. That kiss with a spark he had ignored when they were teenagers. He shouldn’t have. Evan should have bottled up that spark, kept it, and treasured it. They could have avoided so much pain, but that pain had forced him to truly see her. That pain and distance forced him to grow up and see he had always loved AJ.

  AJ was the love of his life.

  “Daddy!” Miller cried out, causing AJ to break their kiss. The concern was sharp in her eyes, and Evan pulled away and got out of bed.

  “I’ll check on her,” he said before he bent over and kissed her and headed for the door. Once he opened it, he went down the hall to his daughter’s room to find the small Christmas tree that was on Miller’s dresser on the floor. Baubles and tinsel littered the floor, but that’s not what had him rushing inside. It was his crying daughter standing by the tree.

  “Daddy, I broke my Christmas tree, and I can’t find Einstein anywhere,” Miller sobbed.

  Evan got on one knee and cupped his daughter’s face, wiping her tears away. “It’s okay.” Her sniffles, though heartbreaking, were adorable. She was as gentle as her mother. “Are you hurt, my love?”

  Miller shook her head. “No. I knocked it over trying to find Einstein. I can’t find him, Daddy? Where is he?”

  Einstein was a soft plush Miller has had since she was a baby. AJ’s uncle—one of her father’s best friends—had given it to her when he first met her. It was her most beloved toy. Evan scanned her bedroom, unable to see him. Now that he thought about it, she didn’t have it when he tucked her in bed last night or when they returned home from her grandparents’ place after watching a Disney movie. She’d been so exhausted that her eyelids quickly fell as they watched the stars on her ceiling. “I’m not sure, but we’ll find him. I’ll look for him while you’re at school.”

  “Promise?”

  “I promise.”

  “Okay, Daddy.” Miller was resigned as she looked down at the floor. “But the baubles are broken. Mummy will be mad. She got me that special one with the stars.”

  “Mummy will be happy that you’re not hurt.” He brushed her last tears away and stood, holding out his hand for his daughter to take. “Why don’t we have some breakfast and get ready for the day?”

  Miller looked over her shoulder, her lip trembling with guilt that she had broken so many of the ornaments in her frantic search for her toy. “B-but …”

  “My love,” he said, getting her attention. “It’s okay. We’ll go to the store after I pick you up from school and get new baubles.”

  “They won’t be like the ones Mummy got.”

  Evan shook his head and squeezed her hand. “No, but we’ll pick a special one and surprise Mummy with it when she comes home from Harvard. Does that sound like a good plan?”

  Excitement shimmered in Miller’s eyes. “Yes, Daddy.”

  Happy to have pleased his daughter, Evan walked her out of the room, hoping he had taken her mind off her missing toy and broken Christmas tree for the rest of the morning.

  Chapter Two

  Evan

  “And you looked all over?” Evan’s brother, Kyle, asked as he placed a set of clear red baubles in the basket. After Evan had dropped Miller off at school, he went home and searched all over the house before he got ready for work. He had even checked in his office, but he still couldn’t find Einstein. Kyle had walked into Evan’s office at Fenway Park asking where he could buy Miller a lifetime supply of Einstein plush toys. AJ had already said that Miller would be able to tell the difference, and it was pointless to try. So Kyle settled with helping to shop for Miller’s new Christmas tree decorations at Prudential Center.

  When they had picked up Miller from school, and she saw her uncle, she had the biggest smile on her face. Of course, Kyle was hounded by many of the moms and dads in the pick-up line. Evan had rolled his eyes as his brother charmed the parents and even gave out baseball advice. And as always, Miller ran up to her uncle and then told him all about her day as Kyle sat in the back seat with her while Evan drove to the mall.

  “I practically tore her room apart. I have no idea where she lost him. She was sad the entire drive to school. Thankfully, seeing you brought that smile back.”

  Kyle grinned as he glanced over at his niece looking at all the decorations. “I am her favorite uncle.”

  Evan chuckled. “Well, considering AJ’s brother is six … you win by default because this week they hate each other.”

  “Seriously?”

  He nodded as they followed Miller farther down the aisle to the blue decorations. The theme for Miller’s new tree was a starry galaxy. She had even picked a picture she liked best on Kyle’s phone. “Yup. Seb thinks she has cooties. He doesn’t want to catch them.”

  “Your brother-in-law is the worst.”

  “Again, Seb is six. And stop that. You love the kid.” Evan reminded as Miller approached them with glittery blue star ornaments. “Do you like these the best?”

  Miller nodded with a bright smile on her face. Evan didn’t know how he was going to help her come to terms with losing Einstein if they couldn’t find him. Maybe a new toy? She still had Harvey the Harvard dog she had picked out on AJ’s first day of her Ph.D., but even that toy couldn’t replace Einstein.

  “Yes, I love them.”

  Evan bent down and lowered the basket for his daughter. “Okay. Add them to the basket. Next up is …” Kyle showed Evan the picture on his phone. “Orange. We need something orange.”

  “Okay. Orange,” Miller repeated before she twirled around and went down the aisle, looking for the perfect ornament.

  “Lucky this place still has decorations a week before Christmas, huh.”

  He nodded in agreement. “Definitely.”

  They turned the corner, and Miller noticed orange crystal ornaments on a hook and pointed at them. “Daddy, I can’t reach.”

  “I’ve got you, Miller,” Kyle said as he scooped her up and helped her reach the ornaments from the highest hook. “So have you gotten Alexi’s p-r-e-s-e-n-t?”

  Evan nodded, thankful that his brother didn’t elude to Santa and the reindeers not being the ones delivering Miller her presents. Miller’s favorite part of Christmas Eve was leaving Santa homemade cookies, milk, and carrots. And Evan loved eating the cookies and leaving crumbs behind for his daughter to find in the morning. “Yeah. It was hard to find.”

  “Oh, what is it? I knitted her a sweater.”

  It still made Evan laugh that his famous MLB brother knitted. Kyle had learned to knit for the Red Sox’s Knit for Kids Cancer campaign last year. Evan didn’t think his brother would continue, but Kyle found it comforting and fulfilling to knit beanies and mittens for children undergoing cancer treatments.

  “AJ will love that. Miller and I got her a rare physics book from the 1900s that she’s been wanting. I think she’ll like it.”

  Kyle laughed as he walked Miller over to the pink ornaments. “Knowing Alexi, she’ll love it. How’s her dissertation going?”

  Evan sighed. As happy as his wife was this morning, she couldn’t hide her tiredness from him. Last night, she had skipped movie night so she could work on it. With it being her final year of her Ph.D., the stress of her research was getting to her. Evan hoped that when Harvard began its winter break in a few days’ time, she’d be able to relax and enjoy the holidays, but he knew she’d still work on her dissertation.

  “She’s been pretty stressed out lately. I’m hoping when winter break begins, she can unwind.”

  Miller picked a box of small light pink baubles and handed it to Evan. “Here, Daddy.”

  “Thank you, my love,” he said as he added her ornaments to the basket. “Let’s find something white.”

  She pointed o
ver Kyle’s shoulder. “Uncle Ky, over there! Let’s go!”

  “Yes, ma’am.” Kyle saluted, holding onto Miller before he twirled around and headed toward the other side of the aisle. As Miller stared at several ornaments, Kyle said, “Just think, when she’s finished with her Ph.D., she’ll be a doctor. Dr. Alexandra Gilmore has a nice ring to it.”

  Evan grinned, already so proud of his wife, and walked over to his brother. He knew AJ was doing her Ph.D. for Miller, and he knew their daughter would be proud of her mother, too. “Actually, she’ll be Dr. Alexandra Parker.”

  “Really?”

  He nodded. “Yup. We talked it over, and I support her decision to use her maiden name. Her formula and all her research were before we got married. Her Ph.D. was all her and her hard work. Not that she needed my permission to drop her married name or anything. Her legacy in science isn’t as my wife. Her next discoveries and theories will have ‘doctor’ before Alexandra Parker like she’s earned and deserves.”

  “That makes sense,” Kyle said as he pointed at the white tinsel that had a hint of blue on the shelf. “How about this, Miller?”

  “I love it!” she said with glee as Evan felt his phone vibrated in his pocket. He reached into his slack’s pocket and pulled it out to find a text from his father-in-law.

  Noel: Hey, Evan. Do you and Miller mind coming over after you’ve finished shopping?

  It’s not a message Evan had expected from Noel, but he’d do anything for his daughter’s grandfather.

  Evan: Yeah, sure thing. Kyle wants to take Miller for hot chocolate after she’s picked out her decorations. Be over in about an hour?

  Noel: That sounds good. See you then.

  Evan slipped his phone back into his pocket. “Miller, Grandpa wants to see you later. Does that sound like fun?”

  His daughter frowned at him. “But I don’t want to see Seb. He was mean to me last night.”

  He stepped closer and brushed his daughter’s hair behind her ear. “Don’t worry. I’m pretty sure he has hockey this afternoon. You and Grandpa will have plenty of time to hang out together.”

  “Hang on a second!” Kyle’s brows furrowed. “You’re telling me Clara actually signed him up for the future Bruins program?” He gagged. “You’re gonna have to have a talk with that kid, Evan. He’s not going to be a Bruin—not when he’s related to a Gilmore.”

  “Kyle,” Evan warned, not wanting Miller to copy her uncle and repeat this conversation to Seb or his parents.

  His brother shook his head. “I never thought Nolan Parker could ever disappoint me. The man gave me baseball, and he gives his son hockey. Unbelievable. Come on, Miller. Let’s find all your decorations before we get you a hot chocolate. God knows Uncle Ky needs one.”

  And just like that, Kyle brought the giggles out of Miller once again.

  Chapter Three

  Evan

  The snow fell heavily after Evan dropped his brother back at Fenway Park. As he drove to his in-laws’ in Brookline, he would look into the rearview mirror to find his daughter staring out the window with wonder in her eyes. She was just like her mother with her love for winter. When Evan pulled up to AJ’s parents’ home, he glanced over at the house next door and smiled. He used to hate where he lived and hated how lonely and cold it would be. The only time it ever felt warm was when AJ was in it with him. If Evan could go back, he’d slap teenage him and tell him to open his goddamn eyes and see that it was always AJ he was meant to love.

  “Are you holding that present tightly, my love?” Evan asked, closing the car door once his daughter was out. Then he bent down and fixed her hood over her head with a smile.

  “I am, Daddy,” Miller said with a grin, holding the gift bag up so he could see that she was.

  Evan stood and held out his hand for her to take. His heart filled with so much warmth and love when she squeezed his hand. He glanced down at her to find her smiling at him. God, he didn’t deserve her love. Evan tried to be the best father he could be, but he knew he had to try even harder as he looked at her. Just so that he could be deserving of that devotion in her eyes.

  “Come on. Let’s go see Grandpa.” He led his daughter up the steps and to the front door. She wiped her little black Mary Jane’s on the welcome mat before Evan opened the door for her. They stepped into the house and slipped their shoes off. Closing the front door, Evan watched his daughter slip off her hood, unbuttoned her jacket, and then take it off. As always, Evan scooped up Miller and helped her set her jacket on the hook on the wall. And like all the times before, she giggled.

  “Hello, you two,” Noel greeted as he stepped out of the living room and into the entryway.

  “Hi, Grandpa! We got you and Grandma a present,” Miller said excitedly as she extended her arm.

  His father-in-law grinned as he closed the distance, taking the gift from his granddaughter before he kissed her cheek. “Thank you, and I have a present for you, too.”

  “You do?”

  “I do.” Noel walked over to the briefcase by the hallway table and bent down. After he rummaged through it, he stood, held something behind his back, and smiled apologetically. “I think you’ve been missing a friend.” Then he brought his arm from behind his back, and Miller gasped.

  “Einstein!” she said as she took her toy from her grandfather. “I’ve missed you!”

  Evan was astounded Noel had it all this time. This morning, AJ had called her parents, but they hadn’t come across Miller’s plush. “Where was he?”

  “Seb hid him in my briefcase. I found him during a meeting. I’m sorry Seb took him. He’ll apologize when he gets back from hockey.” Evan set his daughter on her feet, and she ran into the living room.

  “Kyle’s not happy that Seb’s enrolled in that hockey program,” he told his father-in-law.

  Noel laughed. “It’s only because Kyle can’t skate.”

  “Mummy, you’re here!” Miller said, getting Evan’s attention.

  His brows met as he stepped away from Noel and entered the living room to find his wife on the couch with a white fluffy blanket over her. Miller was already by AJ’s side, both checking on the toy’s welfare.

  She glanced over his way, and her lips pressed in a small smile. “Hey.”

  He had multiple questions for his wife, but the main one being if she was okay. Taking her in, AJ was pale, far paler than before she left for Harvard.

  “Miller, why don’t I get you a snack, and you can show me this present you got Grandma and me?” Noel asked.

  “Okay, Grandpa,” Miller said as she jumped off the couch. Then she handed AJ her toy. “Mummy, can you look after Einstein for me?”

  “Of course, my love. Go enjoy your snack.”

  “I’ll be back,” their daughter said before she walked around the couch and grasped her grandfather’s hand. “Let’s go get you a snack, Grandpa.”

  Noel chuckled. “I was getting you a snack.”

  “You need one, too. We can share snacks.”

  “We can share,” Noel agreed as he walked Miller out of the living room, leaving Evan with AJ.

  The guilt in her eyes shone as she shuffled across the couch and patted the space she made. “Come sit with me.”

  Evan walked over to the couch as his wife lifted the blanket. He sat down, and AJ covered his lap with the blanket. Reaching over, he took her hand and flinched at how cold she was. “AJ, is everything okay?”

  Like their daughter before, she squeezed his hand. “I had a bad day at Harvard,” she admitted with a layer of shame in her voice.

  “What happened?”

  His wife sighed. “This freshman …” She shook her head. “He just said some things that hurt.”

  “What kind of things?” he asked, releasing her hand so that he could turn and face her properly.

  Her chest rose with her deep breath. “That I didn’t deserve my Nobel Prize nomination, and my research was nothing special.”

  Anger and disbelief filled him. In the five
years she had been a TA at Harvard, everyone had loved and appreciated her. They were proud that AJ had chosen them over MIT. She was a Nobel Prize-nominated physicist. Her formula had saved the aviation industry millions, if not billions. How could anyone see his wife as anything less than special?

  “Baby,” Evan whispered as he closed the distance and wrapped his arms around her, bringing her to his chest.

  “I know it’s so stupid to be this hurt. I don’t know why I’m so emotional over it.” She lifted her chin to look up at him. “I know I deserve that nomination. I know how hard I worked on that formula and how hard I’ve been working on my dissertation. At that moment, this freshman got under my skin.”

  “He’s a stupid kid.”

  That had his wife laughing. “Evan, he’s brilliant and smart. If he applied himself, he’s easily smarter than I am. I guess I felt threatened—which is so stupid because I’m actually a physicist. An award-winning, peer-reviewed physicist. Guess all those nights working on my Ph.D. left me a little exposed to criticism.”

  “Hey,” he whispered as he cupped her cheeks and pulled back. “He won’t be half the physicist you are. I can assure you.”

  “You have a lot of faith in me.”

  He smiled at his beautiful wife. “I believe in you because I’ve seen you earn what you deserve. You’re miles ahead of that kid.”

  “You’re just saying that because I’m your wife.”

  “And I’ve seen you at work. Don’t forget I used to come to the Rodahawe Institute in Zürich with you. I’ve seen you work with the world’s best scientists, and you belonged in that room. You created space for yourself, AJ. You’ve earned where you stand. You did that.”

  Tears gleamed her green eyes before they slipped down her face. “God, I love you,” she breathed.

  “I love you, too, but can I ask why you’re here at your parents’?”

  AJ pulled back, her hands falling to their daughter’s toy and setting it on her lap. “I wasn’t feeling well and asked Dad to take me to the hospital.”