Surrender My Love

by Johanna Lindsey

  Erika heard him. She had been screaming already, repeatedly. Her efforts to twist out of the ropes had dislodged dirt on her head and shoulders. Bugs now crawled on her, what kind she didn’t know, but her throat was raw because of them. Yet she yelled again, yelled with what strength she had left. Still, whatever sound got past her gag would not penetrate the wooden plank and grass above her head. Selig was there, he had come for her, and yet he couldn’t hear her.

  “Come,” Turgeis said, helping Selig to his feet. “There is no more to do here.”

  “Come where?” Selig snarled bitterly. “I was so certain she would be here. Now where do we look?”

  “Lord Durwyn will tell you naught, but he was not alone at Wyndhurst. We still have his messenger to find, and I will rip the answers from his throat if I have to.”

  They rode back to Wyndhurst with no less speed than before. Royce was encountered on the way, and Selig informed him, “We found the camp, but she was not there, so leave your men to still search for the while.”

  “And where do you go?”

  “I fear looking for her will produce no results. We will have to be told where she was taken.”

  “Durwyn will not do it,” Royce insisted. “His only hope is to protest his innocence to the bitter end.”

  “But his messenger will know,” Selig said. “And his messenger is still at Wyndhurst. Turgeis plans to rip the answers out of him.”

  “Do you set Turgeis on him, the man will die of fright,” Royce predicted, and not entirely in jest.

  Selig repeated that for Turgeis’s benefit. The giant merely grunted. Selig’s expression hardened, though, when he added for Royce, “I will have answers, one way or another. And I would ask that you stay near me, to speak for me. I would already know where Erika is if Durwyn’s last man had understood me when I promised him freedom. Instead he fled and died anyway, but by accident.”

  When they reached Wyndhurst and entered the bailey, they found it twice as crowded as it had been that morning. Near the hall, Durwyn stood with two guards on either side of him. As Selig rode that way, the guards both reached for their swords in warning.

  “’Twould seem Alfred is now convinced of his guilt. You must let the king have him, Selig,” Royce said.

  “He can have him as long as I can find my answer elsewhere. What goes here?”

  Since Royce had no idea, he shouted for his wife. She was not far away and came running. “Did you find her?” she asked first.

  “Nay, but what is going on?”

  Kristen quickly explained. “If Durwyn had men here, Alfred wants them as well, yet will they not give themselves up. So everyone is to account for his own people, and those accounted for, separated from the rest. Whoever is left unclaimed had best have good reason for being in the king’s party, and be able to prove it.”

  “How much longer will this take?”

  “It has only just begun. Those accounted for are being moved over there.” She pointed to the far side of the bailey. “I have been sending our own people over, one by one. Now you are here, you can help.”

  “That may not be necessary,” Royce said as he stared into the crowd, then suddenly nudged Selig. “There, the man in the leather jerkin. If I am not mistaken, he was with Lord Durwyn when he stopped here last week. Give me a moment and I may be able to find the rest.”

  Selig stared at the man; then his eyes widened. “That one wears my sword!”

  “Proof positive.” They started toward the man. “Do you interrogate him, or cut him up some first?”

  “You can offer him his life,” Selig replied. “If he gives me back Erika, he need not bleed at all. He can even keep my sword.”

  Royce grinned. He just couldn’t help it after a telling remark like that. “When did you start loving her?”

  “Odin only knows.” Selig sighed.

  Ogden was already in a state of terror, with guards pushing him closer and closer to the line of separation. The king was there to identify his personal household and his lords and ladies. And those lords and ladies had to identify their own servants and retainers. Anyone unclaimed was in dire trouble, and one luckless thief had already been taken away by the king’s guards.

  His fear kept him from thinking clearly and coming up with a logical reason for being there, one that could be verified. That was the rub, and that damned Lady Kristen had suggested that proof be required, so that a good liar couldn’t talk his way out of this.

  And then he saw that the Viking was back with Lord Royce, and his terror turned to panic when he saw them staring directly at him, and then starting toward him. The end, then. He was going to die—nay, he would finish what had begun last month first. If he had done his job properly the first time, this wouldn’t be happening. The Viking should have died with the others. He would see to it now.

  Ogden waited until Selig was almost upon him before he drew his sword and attacked—with his sword. The jest was on the Viking, that he would be killed with his own sword. But the man dodged Ogden’s first swipe and drew his own blade. Ogden swung again and again, but met only the steel of the other blade each time.

  “Desist, man,” Lord Royce shouted at him. “Tell him where his wife is and he will let you go.”

  Ogden did not pause in his attack, though he shouted back, “You lie. If he does not kill me, the king will have it done. Think you I would aid a damn Dane when I am to die anyway? You will never find her, yet she is right beneath your nose.” And he laughed—just before Selig’s sword hilt slammed against his head.

  He collapsed, unconscious. Royce retrieved his sword and handed it to Selig.

  “That was your wisest move,” he said. “For he was determined to let you kill him—and without telling you where Erika is. We will question him further when he comes around, yet do I doubt we will get any more out of him.”

  “Any more?” Kristen questioned as she and Turgeis joined them.

  “He said we will never find her, yet she is right beneath our nose. There is a clue in that, if we can but discern it.”

  “Beneath our nose would be right here, or so near we should stumble over her,” Kristen replied. “Yet I have already had the servants search every container, crate, trunk, even the barrels, anything big enough to stuff a body into. She is not hid within these walls.”

  “What does she say?” Turgeis asked Selig.

  Selig repeated it, and the clue they now had—and made up his mind then and there that he was going to learn Saxon if it killed him. His sister was grinning at his exasperation, for only Royce was excluded from the conversation, now they had switched to Norwegian.

  “If we eliminate Wyndhurst, then that leaves the immediate area beyond,” Kristen pointed out. “Where was their camp located?”

  “Near a woods.”

  “Then mayhap they found a cave or a tunnel.”

  “Or a pit,” Turgeis added.

  Selig frowned at that suggestion, reminding him, “Your pit was a four-walled shack.”

  “First it was a hole in the ground. Is there anything like that in the area?” Turgeis asked.

  “Not that I know of,” Selig replied.

  “Could they have dug their own?” Kristen wondered aloud.

  Both Selig and Turgeis stared at her incredulously for a moment; then both suddenly ran for their horses.

  Chapter 47

  THE PIT WAS not easily found. It took an hour of moving bodies aside to cover every inch of ground, then working their way outward. It was Turgeis who discovered it and threw off the grass covering, but it was Selig who was determined to lift Erika out. She was not conscious, could not help even if she were, but her condition absolutely terrified him. And he couldn’t reach her far enough to grasp more than her head, nor was there room in the pit for him to climb down. In the end, Turgeis had to lower him by his feet, then drag them both out at once, luckily an easy task for him.

  She woke before she was laid on the ground, putting their worst fear to rest. Selig ran h
is dagger along the length of her side, cutting all the loops that bound her, but that was all he did before he yanked her up into his arms, crushing her with his emotion.

  “Thank the gods you are all right! Are you all right? If they hurt you, I will kill them again, every one of them. Ah, sweetling, I love you so much. I have never been so frightened in my life! And if you ever go off alone again like you did, I swear I will put you back in chains.”

  Behind them, Turgeis cleared his throat. “You might get a response from her if you finish untieing her and remove that gag.”

  Selig laughed. His relief was making him almost giddy. And Erika was trying to say something through her gag, seemed somewhat urgent about it.

  He cut away the last two restraints. Her arms were stiff, but she still managed to raise them to pull the gag out, then immediately started yanking at her clothes.

  “Help me,” she gasped out, “get them off!”

  “What off?”

  “My gowns! I am crawling with bugs!”

  Her hysteria communicated itself to him, and with each helping, her clothes had never come off so fast. And although he could see no more than two insects on her, she was slapping and rubbing at herself everywhere. He helped her, though much more gently, smoothing her skin with his hands, soothing her panic with the calmness of his voice as he uttered nonsense to put her at ease.

  “My hair,” she cried, and meticulously, he examined every inch of it for her, until he could tell her the bugs were all removed.

  She collapsed against him then, hugging him, thanking him, crying, and suddenly he was too aware of her nakedness—and that they were not alone. He looked toward Turgeis, but the giant was paying them no notice, had turned his back and was sitting on the ground, calmly doing to Erika’s clothes what Selig had done to her hair, examining every inch of them, inside and out, until every insect had been removed. The sight was so incongruous, of that fearsome Viking sitting there plucking bugs from a lady’s gowns, that Selig wanted to laugh. He didn’t. Turgeis had today earned his friendship for life.

  Not until Erika was reclothed did her thoughts turn to her rescue and the conclusion she drew that would explain their finding her. “You withdrew the challenge for me?” she asked Selig in wonder.

  He was chagrined to have to admit, “I would have if I did not go berserk instead.”

  “He attacked Lord Durwyn with his bare hands,” Turgeis added.

  “And no one was sent to kill me?”

  “Turgeis immediately closed the gates to prevent anyone from leaving.”

  She walked over to the giant and hugged him. “I can always depend on you, my friend.”

  “Always.”

  “You will not be angry with me for very long, will you, for going off without you?”

  “Not too long.”

  Selig carefully parted them and drew Erika possessively back to his side. She raised a brow at him.

  He explained, if evasively, “We need to return to Wyndhurst.”

  Turgeis just laughed, a deep barrel sound. Selig gave him a sour look. But they did return to Wyndhurst then, and even with all the extra horses about, Selig still insisted she ride with him. She didn’t object this time. She doubted she ever would again.

  Selig’s whole family met them just inside the gate. The bailey had been cleared, or at least it was back to normal, since Royce had been able to identify the rest of Durwyn’s men, and the lot of them were chained to the prisoner post.

  “So that is Lord Durwyn?” Erika asked, staring in that direction.

  “You know him?”

  “He saw you with Alfred and asked me who you were, but he did not introduce himself, and I was too upset to wonder at his interest.”

  Selig frowned, remembering. “We are going to have to discuss this upset of yours that made you behave so foolishly.”

  “Oh, we will,” she promised, only she did not sound the least bit upset at the reminder. “But how did you find me, if you were not told where to look?”

  “Kristen figured it out.”

  Erika looked at her sister-in-law and smiled. For the first time, Kristen smiled back. A silent apology extended and accepted. They were not friends, but the possibility was now there that they might be eventually.

  And then Selig surprised them all by saying, “We came here first to assure you that Erika is unharmed, but I am taking her home now. It will take me a while to get over nearly losing her. Until I do, I am not letting her out of my sight, and you are not like to see us for a while. Verily, as I need to recover myself from this harrowing day, I doubt me we will leave my chamber for at least a week.”

  Since he was grinning outrageously as he said it, Erika blushed furiously. Garrick and Royce laughed heartily. Brenna teased, “Mayhap I should come with you, to assure you are cared for properly the while you recover.”

  “Not if you want me to keep my sanity, Mother.”

  There were a few more jests that caused Erika’s cheeks to grow even hotter, but then they returned to the peace and quiet of their own home. Only there was nothing quiet about it when they entered their hall with Turgeis, and Golda immediately started in on him.

  “Covered in filth again, and blood this time,” Golda sneered. “Can you never manage to stay clean, Viking? Or do you do it just to annoy me?”

  Turgeis said not a word as usual, but he didn’t ignore Golda this time. Far from it. He lumbered toward her, hefted her onto his shoulder, and, as casually as if he didn’t now have a shrieking woman pounding on his back, mounted the stairs to his room.

  “Should I do something about that?” Selig asked Erika.

  Erika closed her mouth, which had been hanging open. That he was serious made her want to laugh. “Nay, I think it would be best not to interfere. I do not know what he means to do with her, yet am I sure he will not hurt her.”

  Selig grinned. “Ah. So that is the way of it.”

  “I did not say that.”

  “Nor did you have to,” he replied. “And I would not find it amiss if you would like to carry me off like that.”

  A single giggle escaped her before she cut it off, yet the laughter remained in her eyes. “If I ever have the urge to, I will remember that I have your permission.”

  He sighed with dramatic disappointment. “Then I suppose I will have to do it for now.”

  He bent over and up she went, firmly planted on his shoulder. She didn’t shriek or pound as he started up the stairs with her, said merely, “This is not necessary.”

  His hand came to give her backside a gentle caress. “But I am enjoying it.”

  So was Erika, truth be known, so she said no more about it. There was something very…romantic…about being carried off to a bedchamber, even if it was over her husband’s shoulder rather than cradled in his arms. As they passed Turgeis’s chamber, they heard laughter, both a man’s and a woman’s. Erika made no comment, but she smiled to herself, so very pleased for her friend.

  In their own chamber, when Selig set her on her feet, he was immediate in demonstrating what he had in mind to do. Her own intentions were forgotten momentarily as she savored the taste and feel of him pressed along her length, and returned his kiss wholeheartedly. But when he reached to lift her gown, she put a hand over his to stop him.

  One of his dark brows arched in question, but she was suddenly shy of beginning. She had to discuss his mistaken beliefs with him and try, somehow, to convince him that he was mistaken. But what she was most interested in was what she was sure she had heard him say after he had pulled her out of that pit. She wasn’t positive he had said it. She had been too frenzied at the time because of those damned bugs and not paying attention. But a single question would clarify the matter for her.

  She asked it. “Did you—say you loved me today?”

  “Did I? I do not recall.”

  “Then mayhap I am mistaken.”

  His finger ran along her cheek. “Mayhap you are fishing to hear it again.”

  A
bit of stiffness. “If ’tis not so, then I certainly do not want to hear it.”

  “And if it is so?”

  “If you continue to tease me about this,” she growled, “it will not matter if it is so or not. I will—”

  “Throw some more salt at me?”

  She burst out laughing. The man was absolutely impossible, could not even be serious about what was so very important to her. She didn’t notice how still Selig went, though, hearing her laughter, but she saw his confused frown, which ended her amusement abruptly.

  “What is it?”

  “’Tis not the same, your laughter. ’Tis not as I remember it. Let me hear you laugh again.”

  She understood. They were going to discuss the other first, after all, whether she wanted to or not. “I cannot laugh at will, but—”

  He was suddenly gripping her shoulders. “Please, Erika, you do not understand.”

  “I do. ’Tis not the same, because you never heard me laugh before. It was your fever, Selig, that made you imagine it. I was not there for your lashing. I meant to stop it, but I was called away. Ask Turgeis.”

  She saw his stricken look just before he dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around her legs. He was groaning as he buried his face against her belly, and the sound tore at her heart.

  “Nay, get up,” she beseeched him. “You are not to blame for what the fever made you believe.”

  “Why did you not tell me?”

  “I never knew what you thought. Your sister told me only yesterday.”

  “But how can you ever forgive me for what I tried to do to you?”

  She had to smile at that. “Tried, Selig. You never actually managed to get your revenge. You simply could not hurt me.”

  “I put you in chains!”

  “My own guilt allowed it, or be assured, I would have protested more than I did.”

  “I tried to humiliate you.”

  “Aye, well, that you managed, and for that I will let you make amends.”

  “Anything. Just tell me.”

  “Nay, you tell me. Do you love me?”

  “So much it frightens me.”

  Her breath caught in her throat, those words caused her such joy. And since he wouldn’t get up, was determined to wallow in his own guilt now, she went down on her knees to cup his face in her hands.