Hearts and Aces (Kelsey's Burden Series Book 7)

by Kaylie Hunter

“That’s a stretch,” Wild Card said. “I’m not saying he doesn’t have feelings for her, because it happens, but that doesn’t make him a stalker.”

  Tech looked over his shoulder at me.

  I nodded. “You know the drill.” I moved back to my chair.

  Tech started typing, pulling data.

  “Shit,” Donovan said, rubbing his forehead. “Daphne started as a security job for a red-carpet event. She hired us a few times for special gigs—before she had a stalker.”

  I couldn’t stop grinning. “The notes that accompanied the flower deliveries were also non-threatening. More like X-rated love letters from someone with no social skills.”

  “Kelsey’s right again,” Tech said, shaking his head. “I’ve identified three of the gifts on Billy’s personal credit card. He’s our guy. He didn’t even try to hide the expenses.”

  Wild Card and Ryan started laughing.

  “This isn’t funny!” Donovan yelled.

  “Donovan,” Hattie said, coming down the main stairs. “Inside voice, please.”

  Wild Card hurried over, offering Hattie his arm. Lisa went to the kitchen to get her a cup of coffee.

  “Sorry, Hattie,” Donovan said as he got up and walked toward the garage, grabbing my SUV keys on his way out.

  “Why is Donovan upset?” Hattie asked as she sat in the end chair.

  “He just found out one of his bodyguards is a stalker. He’s having a bad morning,” I said, glancing up at the clock. “It’s not even six, yet.”

  “He’ll get over it,” Lisa said, placing a cup of coffee on the table by Hattie. Lisa rested her hand on top of Hattie’s. “I’m glad to see you’re doing better.”

  “Me too, dear,” Hattie said. “I feel better than I have in weeks.”

  “Just take it easy,” I said, pointing at Hattie. “If I hear you’re overdoing it, there’ll be hell to pay.”

  “Like that time when you ran in a race after being exposed to chloroform?” Hattie asked, grinning over her coffee cup.

  “That’s different,” I said. “Everyone knows I’m an idiot.”

  Tech looked up from his computer at me. “Three thousand texts were just sent to the trucking company and the textile mill. Looks like everything’s going according to plan.”

  “Was the package delivered for Miguel?” I asked.

  “Last night,” Tech said, nodding. “If he heads to the airport, he’ll find it sitting on his private jet in his favorite leather seat.”

  “What’s the package?” Maggie asked.

  “A peace lily,” I answered, grinning. “The card has my burner phone number and says: We can do this the hard way or the easy way—you decide.” I nodded to the burner phone on top of the credenza.

  “What the hell is a peace lily?” Ryan asked.

  “It’s the big, dark green plant with the white flower shoots that’s in our living room at home,” Tweedle said, elbowing him. She turned to look back at me. “I can’t believe you sent a flowering plant to the cartel.”

  “It’s a peace plant,” I said, smirking. “I couldn’t resist.”

  “You have the wickedest sense of humor,” Wild Card said, shaking his head.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Getting the kids ready was harder than normal. Based on their level of excitement, you’d think they were going to Disneyland, not being herded into a ten-seat passenger van for a local scavenger hunt.

  “Nicholas, I’m reaching my limit with you this morning. Go!” I said, pointing down the hall.

  Wild Card chuckled as we watched Nicholas stomp down the hall. “Man, that kid hates brushing his teeth.”

  “You were the same way,” Pops said from the breakfast bar. “Always too busy for hygiene at that age. Your mother had the patience of a saint. Then one day, the arguments ended. Just like that”— Pops snapped his fingers—“you started showering and brushing your teeth. You were near obsessed with it.”

  Wild Card turned to me, grinning. “I remember what my mom did, too.” He walked down the hall and into the bathroom.

  I didn’t want to know why Wild Card looked so devious. I was agreeable to any plan that ended the twice a day argument. I turned to check on Sara and sighed. I’d sent her to her room three times to change into something sensible. The last change resulted in substituting her patent leather shoes for her running shoes. She was still wearing a pink party dress, though.

  Beth held up her hand, stopping me from saying anything, as she turned Sara back toward the stairs.

  ~*~*~

  Donovan stood on a chair, holding six sealed white envelopes above his head. “I hired the local police department to write the scavenger hunt list so there’d be no accusations of cheating. I was told there’s one item on the list that they will be actively working to prevent us from acquiring. That’s all they told me. And, no, Kelsey, your pals Steve and Dave were not allowed to contribute to or look at the list—so you can’t use them to your advantage.”

  I grinned. “But according to the rules, we can call anyone other than the local cops as a resource, right?”

  “Any online resource or anyone other than a Kalamazoo police officer can be used as a resource, yes,” Donovan answered with a grin.

  “So…” I crossed my arms as I looked around smiling. “The hundred or more other resources I have in this town will have to do?”

  “Feeling cocky, are we?” Donovan asked.

  “Oh, I’m all over this competition,” I said, grinning back as the kids giggled beside me.

  Bridget laughed, shoulder bumping Tech who looked bored.

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Wayne yelled. “Let’s get on with it.”

  Donovan grinned. “The vans all have a full tank of gas, and the keys are in the ignition.”

  “Bridget drives,” I whispered to our group. “Katie, get ready to run for that list and the rest of us will get the kids loaded in the van.”

  Wild Card took the kids’ backpacks and handed them to Trigger.

  Jerry walked over and took the envelopes so Donovan could join his team.

  “One, two, three, go,” Jerry said without much fanfare.

  Wild Card lifted a kid in each arm as everyone in our group except Katie started running for the vans.

  “The middle van!” I called out. “It’s a straight shot out of the parking lot!”

  “You’re taking this a little too seriously,” Anne said, running beside me.

  “Do you want Bones and Donovan to hold a win over our heads for the next year?”

  Everyone ran faster to the van, throwing the doors open and climbing inside. The kids climbed in and scurried to the back. Wild Card and I took the middle seats while Anne, Trigger, and Tech took the second row. Bridget jumped behind the wheel and started the van as Katie jumped into the passenger seat.

  “I only read a few lines,” she said, passing the list back. “A stripper outfit, Coney Dutch dogs, a chicken, and a garden gnome.”

  Bridget was already squealing tires out of the parking lot, turning toward town.

  “Go to Dallas’ house!” I called out as I read the list and called Dallas.

  “I thought you had that scavenger hunt this morning?” Dallas said, answering.

  “We’ll be at your house in three minutes. I need you to pull your stripper outfits and meet us in the front yard.”

  “Regular stripper or dominatrix?” Dallas asked.

  I took the phone off speaker. “Regular will be fine. Hurry!” I hung up and continued reading the list.

  “Mom? What’s dominatrix?” Nicholas asked.

  “Do you two have your seatbelts tight?” Wild Card asked, turning around in his seat to check their belts and make sure they were latched.

  “Sara, did you start your computer?” I asked.

  “It’s booting up now,” she said.

  “Good,” I said, looking over the list. “I need you to find the architectural plans for the city’s art museum. That must be the warning the police gave Dono
van. We’ll have to find a way into the building and around the police to take a picture of the painting on loan to the museum.”

  “Thirty seconds to Dallas’ house,” Bridget called out.

  “Trigger, get ready to jump out and grab the outfits.”

  Trigger didn’t need to jump out of the van. Dallas was standing next to the mailbox with an armful of sparkling tops and bottoms. A few had dropped in her yard, leaving a trail of unmentionables from her door to her mailbox. Trigger opened the side door, and Dallas climbed in with her loot.

  “I wasn’t sure what color you wanted, so I grabbed everything in the third drawer,” Dallas said as she sat next to me in the middle seat.

  “What’s in the other drawers?” Wild Card asked, picking up a sequined bikini top that had fallen on my lap.

  “Don’t answer that!” I said to Dallas, nodding to the kids in the back seat.

  Dallas glanced over her shoulder before pressing her lips together, trying to hide her laughter.

  Katie turned in her seat and looked at Dallas. “You realize you’re stuck with us until after the competition now, right?”

  Bridget whipped the van in a sharp U-turn, and I grabbed Dallas before she fell to the floor.

  Dallas laughed as she sat up straight. “Beats sitting at home, cleaning. Besides, I might prove to be a valuable team member.”

  I looked down at the pile of stripper outfits in Dallas’ arms, and an idea popped into my head. “Tech. Can you look up what the indecent exposure law in Michigan is? Find out what the penalty is if a senior citizen were to wear a stripper outfit outside a public museum.”

  “Dave’s going to kill you,” Wild Card said, laughing beside me.

  “Where to?” Bridget called out.

  “Head towards town,” I called back.

  “Katie, call Madge Grenner. Ask her if we can borrow her gnomes for the day. Tell her I especially want the one flipping the bird.”

  “Trigger, call the hot dog place on West Main and have them prepare two dozen Coney Dutch dogs and charge them to the company card. Tell them we don’t care if they get cold, but to have them ready for us.”

  “Anne, call Mayor Henderson and have him meet us ASAP at the mission. Tell him there’ll be a photo op, but only if he hurries. We need a team picture with him in it.”

  “Dallas, call Father Eric and tell him we need six purple shirts. With all the clothes we donate, I’m sure he can find at least six that no one wants. I don’t want to bother Alex on a Saturday. And we can take the picture with the Mayor while we’re there.”

  Dallas called Father Eric and proceeded to talk to him in a flirty voice. I rolled my eyes.

  Trigger turned in his seat to look at me. “I’ve got the owner of the hot dog place on the phone. He says they don’t open until eleven, and it will take an hour to get the steamers and grills going.”

  “We don’t have to eat them,” I said, rolling my eyes. “We just need two dozen to take back with us.”

  Trigger nodded.

  “Head to Pine Street,” Katie said, hanging up her phone. “Madge is packaging a few gnomes and will meet us at the end of the driveway.”

  “What else is on the list?” Wild Card asked.

  “A comical sign, four flamingos, and a beach umbrella.”

  “They have flamingo drink decorations at the dance club downtown,” Bridget said. “I know a bouncer there. Katie, pull my phone and call Elvis.”

  “Elvis?” Katie asked.

  “Nickname,” Bridget said, listening to her phone when Katie put it on speaker.

  “Is this the beautiful Bridget?” a deep male voice answered.

  “You’re so lucky Bones isn’t with me right now,” Bridget said, laughing. “I need a favor. We’re on a scavenger hunt and in desperate need of pink flamingos. Can you get your hands on those cocktail decorations from the club?”

  “I happen to have a box in my kitchen. Don’t tell the owner. I live on Pacific Street. Can you make it this way or should I meet you somewhere?”

  “We can meet you,” Wild Card called out as he looked at a map on this phone. “We need to stop at Calvin’s gym, which is only two streets away.”

  “I’ll have them ready.”

  Katie pointed at the upcoming road. “Take a right. Blue house on the left.”

  Bridget took a sharp right turn before pulling to the left side of the road and stopping the van illegally. As Bridget finished talking with Elvis, Katie jumped out of the van and met Madge mid yard to take the box of gnomes. Trigger opened the side door and took the box when Katie returned, passing it back to set on the floor out of the way.

  “Why are we going to Calvin’s gym?” I asked Wild Card.

  “Comical sign,” Wild Card said, pointing to the list. “He has a sign in his office that says: Due to the rising cost of bullets, there will be no warning shot.”

  “He also has a sign in the bathroom that says: Weed - Next 3 Exits,” Trigger said.

  “Doesn’t he have more scattered in the gym too?” Anne asked. “I remember a road construction sign that was supposed to say drive slowly, but was a misprint and says: Caution - slow drively.”

  I called Calvin’s personal cell.

  “No,” Calvin said when he answered. “You can’t have them all, but I’ll let you borrow one sign.”

  “I take it Bones called already?”

  “Called and showed up five minutes later. He’s still here, taking down the bathroom sign. They wanted all of them, but I refused. I’ll take a few more down and have one waiting for you.”

  “I’ll send Trigger in when we get there, but we have another stop to make before your place.”

  “I was Bones’ first stop. How far are you on the list?” Calvin asked.

  “We’re about five minutes from our third item, then you’ll be our fourth. We already have people working on the rest of the list.”

  Calvin laughed. “You’re smokin’ their asses. Power to you, sweetheart, but I want to see your scrawny ass in my gym next week.”

  “Deal. I’ll bring the girls with me and you can put us through the wringer. Thanks, Calvin.” I hung up. “All right, Calvin’s going to save us a sign. Bones is there now and they’re getting their first item.”

  Everyone cheered except for Bridget who was leaned forward and used both hands to grip the oversized steering wheel as she made the next tight turn. Dallas landed on the floor, half wedged between the door and the seat. She laughed as she worked at pulling herself up.

  “Did you hear Kelsey, Bridget?” Wild Card asked. “We’re winning. You don’t need to drive like a maniac.”

  “Which means it’s our opportunity to clock the best time,” Bridget said, making another tight turn to the right a little too fast. “I want Silver Aces guards trying for years to beat our record. We’ll be legends.”

  “I’d rather the kids lived through the day, Bridget!” I yelled as I grabbed the ceiling grip bar.

  “Shit. Sorry,” Bridget said. “I forgot we had fragile cargo.”

  “Pushups!” Nicholas called out.

  Bridget looked back at Nicholas in the rearview mirror and sighed. She took the next turn closer to the legal speed, before calling out the next stop. “Elvis’ place is down on the right.”

  I looked at the cluttered yard and an old RV sitting in the driveway. “I’ll go with you,” I said to Bridget. “Wild Card, take the driver’s seat.”

  As soon as the van stopped, I jumped out and ran across the yard beside Bridget. Elvis met us at the door, handing Bridget a plastic sack. She checked inside and nodded to me.

  I looked back at Elvis. “Do you have an old boom box we can borrow? And music someone could dance to?”

  “Sure,” Elvis nodded, holding the door open and letting us in. “It’s dusty. I haven’t used it in years. My CDs are mostly heavy metal music, though.” He waved a hand at an oversized entertainment stand that displayed a stack of CDs and an old boombox.

  “Anything will
do,” I said, grabbing the top three CD’s that sat on a shelf and the boombox. “Does this take batteries?”

  “Yeah sure. Let me get you a fresh pack.” He returned less than a minute later with a new pack of D batteries. “Anything else?”

  “That’s it. We’ll get everything back to you today or tomorrow.”

  “No problem. I trust Bridget.”

  Bridget and I took off running toward the van.

  “That’s a lot of marijuana,” I said to Bridget as I ran.

  “You noticed that, huh?” Bridget said, laughing as we both dove through the van door.

  “Kind of hard to miss,” I said as I handed my goods over to Anne so I could close the door.

  “Calvin’s?” Wild Card asked as he pulled away from the curb.

  “Yup,” I answered. “Anyone know where we can find a beach umbrella in October?”

  “What about the rooftop bar?” Anne asked. “Or the bar attached to the big hotel downtown? Both of them have patio furniture.”

  “They’ve already closed their patios for the season,” Katie said.

  “Can we buy one?” Nicholas asked. “Or is that against the rules?”

  I looked at Wild Card. “Is that allowed?”

  “The rules didn’t say we couldn’t,” he answered, shrugging. “Calvin’s gym, up ahead. Get ready, Trigger.” Wild Card pulled up alongside the gym’s front entrance. After Trigger jumped out, Wild Card looked over his shoulder at me. “Where would you even buy a beach umbrella this time of year?”

  I shrugged. “Anne and Nicholas, find us a beach umbrella!”

  Their thumbs started working their phones.

  I pulled the list from my pocket. “A chicken. We need a chicken.”

  “Where the hell are you going to find chickens?” Dallas asked.

  “We’ll have to head out of town,” I said, shrugging. “I don’t know anyone who has chickens, but we’re likely to find a farm with a chicken coop if we drive west into farm country.”

  “We can’t just drive around looking for a chicken coop,” Bridget said. “That’ll take too long.”

  Not knowing the area west of town, I called Renato.

  “You in trouble?” he asked when he answered.

  “Only as far as clocking the best time for the scavenger hunt. Any clue where we can find a chicken?”