Endy- Reaching for the Missing Moon

by Jiny Lee

  When I got rid of the muzzle on her mouth, she barely opened up her eyes and recognized me. She said to me, 'Don't cry, son. It's okay. This old one had lived her life, and you have yours. What was the name of your friend? ... Diane? Yes.. Diane... That's a lovely name. Listen, son, I need you to do me a favor. You have to save your friend and don't let her suffer. My time is coming to an end, but always remember what I tell you. As long as you're alive, as long as you're alive....'

  That was her last words. She didn't finish her sentence but I felt like she didn't have to. I knew what she was trying to say. On that day, I made up my mind to do anything to save Diane and to do anything to get her free.

  ,,,

  It wasn't hard for us to figure out what happened. The cartel abandoned all the floors under 13th. They just let us have all 13 floors quite effortlessly. Maybe it was their intention to make us clean up the mess. To make us fear, perhaps, or maybe just to make it easy to control the rest of the floors in the building. If that was their intention, obviously, it worked. I heard that the residents upstairs had become extremely cautious about their behaviors and extremely cooperative to the cartel. They surely didn't want to end up like their neighbors downstairs.

  Some people in the rebel blamed the people upstairs for being that way. They said they were flattering and sucking up the guards. Well, I don't know. I disagreed. I didn't want to blame them. They just wanted to survive. They didn't want to die. They might've been a little flattering and cooperative to the guards but that doesn't make them bad. I mean, what's bad in wanting to survive?

  Anyways, the people on the higher floors were of the least concerns. We had to do a proper funeral for the dead. We started piling them up in one place.

  We didn't have a burial in our customs. When someone dies, we put him out through little openings on the walls like windows and let them burn under the daylight. But this time, there were too many. We couldn't let them all out at once. We had to let them out one by one.

  It was painful. The bodies started to smell inside. The morale of the rebels hit the bottom. Daug tried to do everything to keep it up but it was to no avail. I could see people get discouraged every day by day.

  Daug seemed to make up his mind to bring some changes and tried to refresh the air. He ordered to build a new base camp on the 13th floor, while keeping our headquarter on the first floor. so that we could concentrate all our soldiers on the 13th floor.

  When we managed to treat all the dead bodies and clean up the mess, the cartel proposed a truce. We had no choice this time, so we accepted it. The cartel cleared the 14th floor and made it a demilitarized zone. It became a huge barricade. They knew we were out of supplies. Obviously, their plan was to starve us to death. We had to do something to resolve the situation.

  ...

  Luckily, we had some survivors who used to work at a facility. A drug-making facility.

  The drug they made was called 'Wax.' It was a hallucinogen and made people feel as if they were dreaming a dream that they can control everything. A so-called lucid dreams.

  Daug ordered to build a facility on the sixth floor. Quite many people, including Kimmy, didn't like the idea of relying on drugs. But it was the easiest way for us to get resources from outside. Perhaps the only way, either.

  It wasn't hard to find a buyer outside the building. The people in the city were crazy about Wax. Until then, the only way for them to get wax was through the roof of the building by hiding the drug in random crates. But as we began to sell them Wax, they could get it easily through the direct transaction with us. They welcomed it since we supplied them what they wanted with much lower prices and we could get supplies from them. For a few years, we maintained that status with the cartel and the city and enjoyed a short period of peace.

  And those years, I often had dreams of Diane. She was so desperately crying for help. At the end of the dreams, I sometimes saved her but some other times I lost her.

  I had three Chigan Sar staying on the 13th floor. The sisters only came down to the 15th floor. When I became 17, The guards asked to send boys and girls upstairs. They said if we did, they would treat us as an independent state. But if we didn't, they said the consequence wouldn't be good.

  Of course we refused to send young boys and girls. We couldn't do that to the kids. More than that, there weren't many boys and girls on our side anyway.

  So we made it clear to the guards that we won't send anyone upstairs. At that point, Daug was even preparing a second war on his mind.

  But their reaction was quite unexpected. They sent old and weak people down to us. They clearly knew we wouldn't refuse to accept them. They sent us the people whom they considered 'useless' and 'unproductive' to us every day and soon, the base camp started to fill up with the old and weak. We were winning the justice and cause maybe, but we were losing control. We were losing control of our military system. We were no longer the rebel. We were no longer the soldiers. We turned into the rehab rather than the rebel, and what was worse was that, when I became 18, almost all of us was addicted to Wax.

  When we realized that things were going wrong, it was too late. Daug tried to fix it but everyone was so sickened. Drug addiction was a big problem, but a bigger problem was that everyone was feeling complacent. Every one was so complacent about the current situation. We had enough food, enough supplies and everyone was being satisfied, thinking we were doing the right thing.

  That was the most sickening thing of all. 'Oh, we're doing the right thing. We're taking care of the poor people.' That kind of mind sets. The cartel sent old and sick people literally every day and they all thanked us. They all showed tremendous gratitude to us and said we saved their lives.

  We were sickened by that feeling. We stopped progressing. We forgot what our goal was. We were addicted to it so much that we were dreaming a self satisfying dream while we were rotting inside.

  So, it happened. It all happened quick one day. The guards crushed in and we all got slaughtered. We weren't prepared for the attack. The ones who were supposed to be on the watch were high on drugs. We weren't even able to fight back. They outnumbered us, but sadly it wasn't because they brought a million.

  It ended all so quick. Everyone died. I heard that Daug asked them to let the unarmed residents live. They didn't. They let Daug and his team live instead. They took them upstairs for an execution. the execution was later broadcasted all over the building.

  Our squad managed to survive that mess. It was Purple's idea. We changed our clothes to those of the dead guards. We shot each other to intentionally fake an injury so that we wouldn't be suspected. We were sent to the hospital on the 30th floor. There, we escaped and spread out.

  ,,,

  After we got out of the hospital, we went down to the 39th floor and we bought a place to live. We bought two neighboring rooms and made a door inside. Where did we get the money from? It was Purple. When we were running away, he somehow took a bag full of Wax. He was always good at coming up with things that normal people couldn't come up with. He sold it to people and suddenly, we were like the richest people on the floor. Thanks to him, we couldn't find it difficult to make a living at all.

  We were very careful not to be suspected. We didn't do anything dangerous at all. We tried to blend in. We told everyone that we were from upstairs. In fact, they were pretty much helpful to us. If we had honestly told them we were from downstairs, they wouldn't have been that helpful.

  So, we let people believe that we were from higher floors like 70th. We didn't have to make up any detail to make them believe because they made the details up for themselves. I'm gonna give you a tip here. If you keep silent about who you really are, people consider you're the most miserable person that they've ever me. We became a victim of the guards who'd lost everything from upstairs.

  Two more years had passed and I disguised myself as a factory worker. The factory I worked was on 49th floor. There, working as a worker, I waited for the right time.

  Purple
became a guard to get information. Fox and Kimmy became nurses, and Alex and Wonder became a vendor. They moved up and down the stairs buying and selling things. Vendors were under strict surveillance but they were good at disguising. Good enough to take the risk. We tried to find any sign of survivors but we couldn't, since there was none.

  We were the only ones. We stopped calling ourselves the rebels. There was no point in using that name. Instead, we called ourselves brothers. It started like, whenever someone asked us where we were going, we answered, to see my brothers. So we became real brothers and sisters of each other.

  Our plan had become to go all the way up to the top floor and kill the Reaper. But we had one thing to do before anything else. We had to find Hannibal.

  11

  In that house, Kimmy and Fox stayed together in one room, and I stayed in the other with Purple. Alex and Wonder came home once in a while but they were more often outside. They seemed not to sleep at all. They took occasional naps but not a good day sleep. That was exceptional. Just like a cat. you know. Cats have a good quality sleep only for a few minutes and then wake up like they've been sleeping for hours.

  Speaking of cats, Purple said he wished to go down to the basement from time to time. He said he wanted to find out whether Violet was still alive. He was deeply convinced that Violet was alive, but there was no way for us to find out. I suddenly wondered whether Orion was still alive, too.

  Anyway, we took care of each other pretty well. We took care of each other and celebrated each other's birthdays. On Kimmy's birthday, well, she had been talking about how she wanted to have a cake. She wanted a decent cake. A decent cake with loads of cream on it. Somehow, Alex and Wonder got that kind of cake and brought it home. It was so good. I asked them how they got it. They said they had been near the 100th floor.

  Alex said, 'People over the 100th floor are living like kings and queens. You know what? There are no 101th, 103rd and 105th floors and so on because they cleared those floors and put together every two floors to use it like a single floor with a stupidly high ceiling. You know what I'm saying?'

  I asked him again, 'So, they put together every two floors to make it twice as high?' and he said, 'Exactly! and they still call their floors the 100th and the 102nd, not the 100th and the 101st. isn't that stupid? The 102nd floor after the 100th floor. And you know what they call the hallways?'

  Kimmy answered, 'Corridors?'

  Wonder said, 'No,' in a rather playful manner.

  'Aisle? Oh, I see. Galleries! They call them galleries don't they?'

  Kimmy guessed all the fancy names she could come up with for hallway but none of them was the right answer.

  Wonder said, 'No, they call them streets! You have to see them, They made the floor resemble a town! Curvy streets, buildings with two stories...'

  I stopped her, saying, 'Wait a minute, buildings with two stories? What are you talking about? How can there be a building? We are in the building already.'

  Then Alex said, 'No, Endy. You'll see when you see them. They made it really looks like there are buildings and streets.'

  I said, 'Well, okay. But how did you go up there? The guards didn't stop you? You can't go up above the 100th floor.' And they said they glanced over while meeting someone in front of the huge gate. By the huge gate, they meant the only gate leading to the 100th floor from the 99th floor.

  Alex and Wonder told us a lot of stuff like that. Their major plan at that time was to gain access to the highest floors. Alex always said it was important to have as much information as possible. He was right about that. No matter what our plan was, it was important to have information.

  'No matter what our plan is...' That's what we used to say a lot at that time. We were being extremely cautious about not saying what our plan was. It had become something like a taboo that no one said anything about our plan and what we should do. We needed some more time.

  ...

  Sorry I passed out for a second. Well, I can see the moon so clear. It's an amazing view that I'd like to share. Quite cold, though. If I had a blanket or something. Damn.,.

  There's one good thing about living inside the building. It has a perfect insulation. The inner temperature is maintained perfectly at all times, so we don't feel the change of the seasons all year round. We just see it by the changing stars.

  The building itself is an architectural master piece to begin with. I heard that the purpose of the building was quite different from how it is used now. I heard it somewhere, maybe from my mom, that It was planned to be the biggest self-sufficient building that can take care of almost everything inside even without any outside contact.

  A perfect system. It was planned to have a living quarters, to have a factory, a generating plant of its own, and I heard that there was even a farming facility. The farming facility was replaced to a drug plant, though.

  Kimmy worried about that. She worried all the time what if one of us got addicted to it. Fortunately, none of us did. We needed to be keen and alert at all times and Wax made our senses dull out. Alex and Wonder dealt with it sometimes, but to them, it was just a pricey merchandize.

  To be honest, we had a fairly good time then. For the first time in my life, I didn't have to worry about sudden death. We had plenty of money, and we had security. We didn't have to worry about the guards thanks to Purple. He perfectly indulged himself into the role as a guard that no one ever suspected him. He took care of our identities and all that. From time to time, he had a hard time pretending to be a loyal dog of the cartel, but he was doing all right in general.

  There was a good news, too. Violet was alive! Purple found her somehow and brought her to our house. She got used to hanging around our house and we made a little cat door between the boy's room and the girl's room. She liked to spend time in the girl's room since it had more pieces of furniture for her to hide under.

  Violet even had babies. We all wondered how she got pregnant. I think there were more cats hiding in the building than we'd thought. You know, cats are good at hiding.

  She had three baby kittens. Two were black, and one was like dark bluish gray with a white paw. We named him Boxer, since it looked like she was wearing a white glove. The other two were Bonnie and Chip but they couldn't make it more than a few weeks.

  Violet really cared for Boxer. I could feel that mother's caring even though she was only an animal. All animals have that mother's love, I suppose. They all know who's her sons and daughters and they can do anything for their children. Like my mom did. Kimmy told me one day that after I was hit by a guard on the Chigan Sar, mom ran to me. Even though people were trying to stop her, telling her that it's dangerous, she pushed everyone and ran right to me. And so she was killed. She was killed next to me while I passed out by one of the guards who was stumping on my face.

  That was how she died. Kimmy told me this when I became 20. She said she thought I needed to know. I believe it was hard for her to tell me, either.

  So, those were the peaceful days. Nothing really happened around us. We gathered information, tried to be prepared everyday, thanked to just be alive and never mentioned any specific plans.

  Then one day, Alex said he had heard somewhere that Hannibal moved up to the 100th floor. We finally got our next small plan. We had to follow him and go up to the 100th floor somehow.

  12

  In order to enter the 100th floor, we needed a lot of money. Well, we had pretty a lot of money for someone who lived on the lower floors, but we needed more.

  The floors above the 100th floor were called the higher floors, and beneath it were called the lower floors. Basically, there were a couple of ways to get to the higher floors for people who weren't born there.

  First, you should be a guard and get promoted, like Hannibal did himself. Hannibal was from the lower floors but he made his way up there through his career. Purple was a guard and there was a possibility for him to go up. But we weren't sure when that day would be. And we needed to go up together at once
.

  So, the second possible option for us was to be a vender. Alex and Wonder actually did go up to the 100th floor from time to time to sell things. But that option also had a limitation cause, even though you get approved to pass the gate to the 100th floor, you can't stay there for longer than a few hours.

  Alex told us that all the residents on the higher floors have id cards of their own. Without the id cards, no one could stay for more than a few hours on the higher floors, because the cameras and sensors everywhere on the floor detect people without the cards. And of course, the guards had an authority to kill them without question.

  So, we needed those cards. We needed six forged cards and they were incredibly expensive. Besides, we needed extra money to buy a house, which was even more expensive. By the calculation Fox made, we could get that money approximately in 30 years with the money we were earning at that time. We couldn't wait for that long. I couldn't let Diane live her entire life as a slave and die.

  While we were all struggling to figure out what to do, Purple said maybe there was a secret vault in the basement. He said he remembered Daug said one day that he had been saving up for a project. A project to turn everything over at once.

  It wasn't sure whether the secret vault existed or not. Even if it was, the floors beneath the 14th floor were still blocked down and it was almost impossible to go down. The cartel had made a deal with the city and sold the floors and they were using the floors as a prison.

  According to what people were saying, all the dangerous criminals from all around the city were imprisoned there. There were no rules, and there weren't even any guards or police from the city.

  And of course they were all day walkers. People were saying that the day walkers were genetically superior to us and many of them had mechanical arms and legs which can tear apart a metal plate like tearing apart a piece of paper.

  But still, we had to give it a try. We knew Daug. If he said he had been saving up, he was surely saving up something whether it was money, resources, weapons, or whatsoever. No matter what it was that he was saving up, it was surely something of great value. We had to give it a try.