by R. G. Angel
“Yeah, I would love to.” I stood up, reaching for my sweater vest.
There was that million-dollar smile again, victory in his eyes. It may have been a bit too much for just a coffee but, as reluctant I was to recognize it, it was nice to feel appreciated.
We stopped at a little café just a few streets from the dorms. It didn’t look like much from the outside, but the inside took my breath away!
It was very cozy with a very original atmosphere. It was like being inside a tree trunk and I had a flash of Alice in Wonderland when she went down the rabbit hole.
“It’s so pretty!” I gasped as he helped me out of my jacket before pointing to a corner table. “How did you find this place?”
“It was by accident that I found it, but I figured you would like it.” He took his own jacket off before sitting across from me.
I frowned slightly. I’d just met the guy and he was making assumptions on what I liked or not. Maybe he was just as perceptive as I was.
I took a good look at him as he hung his jacket on the back of his chair. He was clearly a very preppy, well-dressed guy. He was wearing a pair of black dress pants and an eggshell V-neck cashmere sweater that looked like a designer piece. He looked more like a Manhattan Fifth Avenue resident than an Oregon student.
“What?” he asked as he caught me staring at him. He didn’t seem annoyed or uncomfortable with that; he sounded…amused. I would have loved to have such self-confidence.
“Nothing…” I shook my head vigorously. “Maybe we could talk about my research,” I added, trying to hide my discomfort.
“Okay…” He chuckled, handing me a menu with the widest coffee selection I had ever seen. “First, we order, then we talk, deal?”
I nodded before quickly looking through the list.
“Are you ready to order?” asked a tall lanky guy with a sweet baby smile.
I smiled back and I could feel so much sweetness coming from him.
“Yeah, thank you. I’ll have the vanilla cinnamon latte, please.” I put the menu down, quickly glancing at Gareth.
“Just a coffee, black,” he ordered, not even looking at the waiter, which displeased me slightly.
“Do you want some cream with it?”
Gareth turned slowly to look at the waiter and I didn’t like the look he was giving him. “What part of ‘black coffee’ don’t you understand? Are you mentally challenged?” Gareth snapped, looking at the waiter with such condescension I could picture myself kicking him in the shins with all I had.
Wow… when did I get that violent? I thought, surprising myself. His attitude was rubbing me in all the wrong ways. I hated disrespect; it was one of my pet peeves.
The waiter flushed with embarrassment. He mumbled some excuses before rushing to the counter. Poor guy! He had been wronged and he was the one apologizing.
Gareth sighed with a light shake of his head before looking back at me. “Where were we?”
I pursed my lips tightly, trying my best to contain my anger as I didn’t want to make a scene in public.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, arching an eyebrow.
“What’s wrong?” I repeated incredulously. “What’s wrong?” I shook my head, getting up. “Thanks for the invite. I'm going home now,” I added coldly, reaching for my jacket.
Gareth caught my arm. “Wait! Can you at least tell me what I did wrong?” He seemed genuinely lost.
I snorted. I figured it out now. He was just some rich guy who always got everything he wanted with no respect or consideration for who he believed were ‘second-class’ citizens.
“You insulted that poor guy!” I pointed at the bar. “I’ve never seen anyone be as condescending as you were!” I hissed. “I just don’t want to be associated with someone like you!” I added, removing my arm from his grip.
He studied my face calmly. “I can assure you, Fay, should the roles have been reversed, he would have done the same. Humans are like that,” he stated so placidly it made me even angrier. Did he really think it was valid excuse? Apparently so.
“Humans? You can’t know that! We’re all different!” I snapped, trying to keep my voice as low as I could. “And even if it was the case, I don’t give a rat’s ass!” I took a deep breath to steady myself. “I’m not like that.”
“I know you are not,” he almost whispered like he didn’t want me to hear him. He caught my arm again. “Please stay. I’m sorry,” he apologized and he seemed sincere. “I didn’t want to upset you. I’ll apologize, I promise,” he added, almost pleading, and even if I barely knew him, I was sure he was absolutely not the pleading or apologizing type. Which, I admitted, gave more impact to his lousy attempt.
I looked at him a few seconds, trying to figure out what I was supposed to do.
“Just…please,” he tried again, looking up at me with his icy-blue eyes, his hand still loosely wrapped around my wrist.
I exhaled loudly and sat down again, still giving him my look full of reproach.
“I know it’s not an excuse, but I’m not that used to social interactions. I…” He shook his head.
“I don’t need to be Nancy Drew to see that!” I mumbled, still angry but it was slowly starting to fade. I had a temper—that was a given—but I usually calmed fast.
When the waiter came back with our drinks, Gareth apologized profusely. I wasn’t sure the apologies were sincere as such, but he clearly and sincerely wanted to please me which was better than nothing.
We started to talk about the project, but the subject quickly switched to ourselves and we started to share what we liked in life, our studies, and the triviality of our lives in general.
“Where are you from?” I asked him.
“New York,” he replied, and I had to smile. I'd been spot-on. “You?”
“New England.” I cocked my head to the side as he finished his coffee. “Why come here? New York is basically the center of the world.”
He shifted his eyes to the side. “It is,” he conceded, “but for the wildlife?” He grimaced. “Not so much.”
It felt nice to spend time with him once he stopped being an ass to people.
He walked me home quietly and once we stopped in front of my door, he let out a quick laugh.
I smiled up at him. “What is so funny?”
“I was thinking that if I kissed you now, it would be socially seen as a date.” He rested his shoulder on the doorframe.
“I see…” I trailed off, biting my bottom lip, trying to hide my surprise. “Do you want to see it as a date?” I asked.
“Would you mind if it was?” He reached down, removing a strand of brown hair that escaped my messy bun and gently put it behind my ear.
“I…” I stopped for a moment to think. “I don’t think it would be wise,” I confessed.
“Maybe we should test the theory… Just to be sure,” he mused, his blue eyes darker now as he stood closer to me.
I kept looking at him, not really knowing what to say. Before today I’d never kissed anyone, and I was about to kiss my second guy in one day.
He slowly leaned down to kiss me. I kept my eyes on his plump red lips, somehow wondering if his lips would be as soft as they looked.
A loud throat clearing brought me back to reality. I looked down, breaking the spell, and took a couple steps back.
“Am I interrupting?” asked Tamlin; his deep voice which usually was so warm contained a cold edge.
I glanced at him, and his hard face made my heart flutter.
“What do you think?” Gareth growled.
I quickly looked up at him and saw anger flash in his eyes. I decided to intervene before he got the chance to say anything which might give me the wish to physically hurt him again.
“No, you are not.” I finally met his eyes which was a mistake as the betrayal in them made me feel guilty. “Gareth is a very helpful friend who is assisting me with my research.” I emphasized the word ‘helpful’ hoping that Gareth would take the hint and not be rude
.
“Isn’t that sweet?” Tamlin asked Gareth in an apparent calm voice but he seemed tense, jaw locked, as if he was defying him in some way which made no sense, or maybe he felt protective of his freshmen…
Geez, like I needed another overprotective type of brother in my life, I thought with both annoyance and hurt.
“I just need to have a quick word with you,” Tamlin requested calmly, crossing his arms on his chest.
“Of course,” I intoned as I didn’t want Gareth to see the awkwardness between Tamlin and me.
Gareth turned toward me, his angry scowl morphing into a soft, caring look. “Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Gareth trailed his hand down my arm with a small smile and squeezed my hand as he was doing his best to ignore Tamlin.
“’Kay, bye,” I replied with a smile.
I looked at Gareth’s retreating form before concentrating on Tamlin again, and looking at him made my heart jump in my chest once more. It was really started to get annoying, but it also helped me to realize that it was not only because he was beautiful, it was more.
He was standing there in an oversized sweater, well-worn blue jeans, and black sneakers, but he had such an effect on me, far more than Gareth ever could and that date helped me understand what I refused to see. With Tamlin, I had experienced love at first sight.
I never thought that was real! I thought it was a bedtime story for silly naïve little girls, but it was real. I was experiencing it firsthand and it hurt—a lot.
“So…” I trailed off.
“Can we just…” He nodded toward the elevators.
I nodded, quite uncomfortable at finding myself alone with him in my room but I needed to be a grown-up.
“Please, come in.” I opened the door, gesturing him in.
“You know about before—” he started but I raised my hand to cut him off. I was still mortified about what I had done.
“Please, I would love for us to forget about that,” I pleaded. “There is no reason for you to feel bad and I should be the one apologizing,” I confessed.
He opened his mouth to say something but closed it again seeing my pleading eyes.
“I don’t know why I did it!” I added, sitting heavily on my desk chair. “I realized it was wrong on so many levels, so please let’s just move on.”
Tamlin looked at me for a little while before nodding. “Yeah, that’s for the…best,” he echoed with a small smile. “Still friends, right?” he asked expectantly.
I was about to say ‘but we weren’t friends in the first place’ but deep down I knew it was a lie. I even thought we might have been friends since the moment he picked up my ball on the floor. Without talking about my unrequited love, I trusted him a lot already and I could see he trusted me too. We only met two weeks ago but it was like a part of me had known him forever… a sort of kinship that neither of us saw coming.
“Of course, we are!” I stood up to face him.
He took an uncertain step toward me and then another. I was not used to seeing him like that, hesitant. He was always so… strong.
He opened his arms and pulled me into a quick, awkward hug before rushing out of the room, disappearing as fast as he came.
I turned toward the mirror and brought my hand up to my lips, still feeling Tamlin’s lips on mine.
How could I be his friend when I felt so deeply about him? I guess only time would tell.
Chapter 6
The next few days were a bit awkward both with Gareth who seemed to be a little taken aback by the distance I’d put between us and Tamlin who was trying so hard to make a comeback into my life and I wasn’t sure on what status he wanted to be back. Friend? Protector? Brother by proxy? It didn’t really matter because none of these statuses were what I really wanted—boyfriend and lover.
I played with my pen as I waited for Gareth in the library and I couldn’t help but think about my brothers’ comments about boys. ‘Boys will say anything to get in your pants.’ I snorted out loud at that one.
Tamlin had an open invitation into my pants and it seemed to be the last thing he was interested in.
I’d never crushed on someone real before. I mean I knew I liked men. I did have a thing for Klaus Michelson, but yeah, no guy in high school ever managed to raise anything from me. I started to believe that all the attraction, desire, and lust I was supposed to have felt back then was now concentrated all for one person… Tamlin Wood, my newfound friend and sometime confident… The source of my first ever erotic dreams that were leaving me hot, bothered, and greatly unsatisfied in the mornings.
Tamlin Woods, my—
“Hey!”
I startled, looking up to see Gareth standing in front of my desk, a wicked smile on his face. Everything about him was perfectly set. His perfectly styled disheveled hair, his clothes matching to perfection, the perfection of his face, its lines… no matter how much I studied it, I had yet to find a flaw.
“Sorry, I’m a bit late,” he added with a huff, resting his leather satchel on the table before taking the seat across from me. “I was running the office hours and a student just wouldn’t get it,” he added with an eye roll. “I swear these people are taking stupid to a level I never thought was possible. They should be grateful they don't need to think to live because they’ll be long dead. Uh… maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.”
Ah, Gareth the asshole was having a field day today. “Don’t be so harsh; not everybody can be as smart as you.”
“You are,” he replied, crossing his arms on his desk and leaning closer, giving me a good whiff of his cologne with a hint of fresh mint and pepper.
I couldn’t help but blush at the compliment. Gareth was so aggravated at everyone all the time. So coolly detached, untouchable, that every compliment made me marvel.
“We both know it’s not the case. You’re a genius.” And it was true; the guy spoke seven languages!
He smirked at me. “You sound impressed.”
I nodded. “I am, you’re one of a kind, Gareth. In so many ways.”
“Is that a compliment?” He arched an eyebrow and I realized we were crossing the line into flirting yet again.
I leaned back on my chair, resting my hand on my notebook. It was a line way too easy to cross.
“Sometimes it is. Sometimes,” I grimaced. “Not so much.”
He sighed, leaning back too, probably seeing I retreated into my corner. “So, have you decided what your subject will be?”
“Are you sure you’re not going to put yourself in trouble by helping me?” I asked once again.
“Is it important? You won’t get into trouble.”
“I know I won’t. But I don’t want you to get into trouble.”
He examined my face for a couple of seconds as if the idea of someone worrying about him was foreign. He shook his head. “No, don't worry. As long as I’m not helping you in the subject I’m teaching, we are good.”
I sighed in relief. “Okay, I was thinking about doing a paper on exotic reptiles.”
“Okay, any type in mind?”
“Yeah, snakes maybe.” I wanted to sound dismissive and maybe I succeeded, but truth be told I still couldn’t let go of what happened with the cobra. I needed to find an answer that made sense.
He nodded, pondering the idea. “That’s actually quite original. I think if well done, it could get you a high grade.” He grinned. “Lucky I'm an expert.”
With his flirty smile? I was sure that Gareth Somerson was an expert in many things.
“I’m sure you are.”
“But you’ve got to be careful with Professor St. Claire. He is as pedantic on the content than he is on the form. How many sources can you use for this paper?” he asked, back to the serious academic Gareth. “Did he also say if you can use external references or does it all need to be part of an academic institution?”
“Good question.” I rummaged through my bag to find the three-page document detailing all the rules.
“Mr. Somerson?”
I heard as I was looking through the chaos of my backpack.
I looked up to see a quite attractive blond girl looking at Gareth with a bright smile on her face.
His face turned to stone and I didn’t need to be an expert on Gareth Somerson to know he was beyond irritated at her arrival. He looked up, silently inviting her to continue.
She squirmed on the spot and she threw me a quick look. I pretended to go back to my bag.
“So, ummm, I’m working on the paper that Professor Jordan gave us, you know. And I, ummm, just, you know—”
“I’m already dreading the quality of the paper you will force me to grade based solely on your remarkable eloquence,” he replied coldly. Asshole.
“I, what?” She cocked her head to the side.
I winced for her; she should have just walked away at this point.
Gareth made a continue motion with his hand. “We’re losing daylight, Miss…”
“Ashford”? she said, flushed with embarrassment as her friends were spying and sniggering. Okay, her intentions were probably not pure, but still.
“Is that a question?”
Fuck, Gareth! You got to stop.
“I, no, I—”
He raised his hand to stop her. “If you have questions about the assignment, which I highly doubt, the TAs have open office hours—refer to those if it’s not above your understanding. Secondly, if it’s for anything else, you’re wasting your time. I have no interest.” He turned a little on his chair to face her, tilting his chin up with all the arrogance I’d seen him harbor before. “And let me reinforce this. No interest at all, not ever, not today, not tomorrow… Ever in you or any of your ‘waste-of-good-oxygen’ friends who are taking bets on which one will get me to go out with them.” He pointed at the group of girls who were now rushing away. His nostrils flared with his annoyance. “Anything else?”
She looked at me, wide-eyed, her eyes already shining with unshed tears, but I could only look away. It was too late now, I thought as she rushed away.
He turned toward me, his face now back to its placid cool. “So did you find the leaflet?”