by Cate Ashwood
I knew he was right behind me, but I needed air. I needed space. My eyes searched for an exit and spotted one to the right of the dance floor, the red sign illuminated in the dim light. Turning abruptly, I made my way toward it, pushing it open and stepping out into the night. The air was several degrees cooler than the temperature indoors, and it made all the difference in the world.
I leaned against the brick of the building, my head dropped forward, and stared at my feet. Chase stood, watching me. I could feel his gaze on me, but I couldn’t look up. I didn’t have the strength to meet his eyes.
“This was a bad idea,” I said at last.
“A nightclub?”
I could tell from his tone he knew exactly what I meant.
“I think we should call this off. The bet. The bet was a stupid idea.”
Finally, I looked up.
“If that’s what you want,” he said.
I nodded because I couldn’t say the words. I had no idea if we’d already gone too far. I hadn’t fucked him, but I wanted to. My body buzzed with the thought of it, and that terrified me. I had no idea if I’d ever be able to go back to the way we were before, and the thought of losing Chase, of losing the years of friendship we’d built together—it scared the shit out of me.
He took a step forward, his eyes boring into me. “Is this about Dominic?”
It took me a moment to process the question. “What? No.”
“You’re lying.”
“I’m not.”
“Look, if you want to back out because all this is making you uncomfortable, fine. I’d permanently tattoo Justin Bieber on my ass to save you from feeling uncomfortable. But if this is some sort of weird chivalry thing because you think you’re cramping my style or whatever, you’re not.”
“It’s not that…”
He took another step toward me.
“Then what is it?”
“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. “This went differently than I thought, and I think messing around with our friendship is going to end up fucking something up. I don’t want to risk losing that over a stupid fucking bet.”
A third step closer and there wasn’t much space left between us. I could feel the force of him like a magnetic pull, tugging me closer. I wanted to touch him but balled my hands into fists instead, digging my blunt nails into my fleshy palm.
“You think there’s anything in the world that could tear our friendship apart?” he asked, his words like a prayer. I wanted to drown in them. “There’s nothing on this earth.”
One last step and his body was flush with mine. I held my breath, willing myself to stand stock-still. Chase was so fucking close I could smell the tang of the alcohol on his breath and the warm musk of his cologne. I couldn’t give in.
And then I didn’t have to. My gaze dropped to his mouth, and he tilted his head up, his lips grazing mine with painful gentleness. For a moment I wondered if I’d imagined it, but the moment our eyes met, I knew his feelings mirrored mine. I closed the space between us again, slanting my mouth down over his.
There, in the dark alley, next to a dumpster undoubtedly teeming with rats, I gave up trying to do what I thought was right and instead I kissed my best friend the way I’d wanted to for the last week.
He groaned against me and I swallowed the sound down, memorizing it before locking it away. I’d never heard anything as good as that, and I wanted desperately to make him do it again. I kissed him harder, sliding my hands along his sides, around to his ass, and hauled him against me, crushing his chest to mine. I sucked at his tongue, making him whimper.
We were making out like horny teenagers, and I was getting embarrassingly close to it all being over. I pushed him back, just far enough to let the night air cool my libido a degree or two.
“We can’t do this,” I started, and Chase kissed me again, presumably to shut me up.
“What you meant to say is that we can’t do this here.” He grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the alley, flagging down the first cab we saw.
Chapter Fifteen
Chase
It was almost midnight by the time the cab pulled up in front of Alec’s apartment building. The ride back to his place had been intense. The cab driver pretended not to notice when I forwent the seat belts in the back in favor of climbing into Alec’s lap and grinding our cocks together through the fabric of our pants the whole way home.
By the time we pulled up in front of his house, I was ready to pop in my jeans. I was grateful we’d arrived when we did, or I’d have ended up with pants full of come and a head full of regret over missed opportunities.
Behind the closed door of his building, he attacked me. He grabbed at my shirt, ripping it over my head. His hands were rough against my skin. His palms traced a scorching path across my chest, and he handled me forcefully, spinning me around and pushing me forward toward the stairs.
I had a hard time making my body cooperate, my feet heavier than usual, my brain sluggish from a nearly lethal mixture of whiskey and sexual neediness. I couldn’t believe this was actually happening, that I was on a crash collision course toward Alec’s bedroom, where hopefully we would be painting each other with semen.
I heard Alec grunt behind me, and then I felt his hands at my waist. I stopped moving, three stairs up. He tore my jeans open and grabbed at the waist, pulling hard and forcing them down over my ass. His palm was blistering hot against my back when he pushed me forward, making me bend at the waist.
I braced my weight against the stairs, my bare ass in the air, and shivered hard as I felt his breath against my skin. He spread me open, exposing me to him. I had less than a second to react before his mouth was there, his tongue laving against me, massaging me, making me completely fucking mindless. I lost the ability to breathe as he ate me out, his hand snaking between my legs, to wrap his fist around my cock.
He stroked as he licked, the roughness of his calloused fingers creating a friction on my shaft I wasn’t used to. I was instantly in love with the way he touched me. Sensations compounded with the knowledge it was Alec’s tongue in my ass, Alec’s fingers pumping me.
If he kept this up any longer, I was going to bust all over his stairs, but I couldn’t force myself to move. My whole body felt boneless, like the only thing holding me up was Alec’s grip on me.
“Fucking hell, Alec, your mouth,” I gasped as he increased the pressure of his tongue against my hole.
He pulled off, leaving me feeling bereft. “Get upstairs and I’ll let you fuck my mouth as long as you want.”
“Shit—” I scrambled to my feet and pulled my pants up high enough to keep me from tripping and falling to my death.
I took the stairs two at a time, clambering up to the second-floor landing. I made it inside and almost to his bedroom before he caught up with me, grabbing my wrist and spinning me around to slam me against the doorframe. My head hit with a thump, but any pain was soothed away when his mouth covered mine. I kissed him back, lifting up on my toes to wrap my arms more fully around his neck and give myself a better angle to taste him. I dipped my tongue deep, and his slid along mine. The moans and whimpers were coming faster now, and the rumbling groan he let loose when I ground our dicks together through the fabric of our clothes had me inching precariously close to coming again.
He broke the kiss and pulled back far enough to shove my pants down once more. I stepped out of them, naked in front of him as he dropped to his knees. I swallowed hard and he looked up at me, his pupils wide in the dim light and a wicked grin on his face.
If I wasn’t careful, this was going to be over before it really got started.
His mouth enveloped my cock, the pressure wet and hot and urgent as he sucked me right back, sliding the head of my dick along the roof of his mouth and into the back of his throat. I groaned hard enough the neighbors definitely heard me and let my head fall back, focusing solely on that epicenter of pleasure.
Alec stilled, then gripped my hips, pulling them forward
, encouraging me to move.
I didn’t need to be asked twice.
My knees nearly buckled as I thrust forward into his mouth, seeking that perfect suction that would tip me over the edge. Alec sucked me hard, the movements of his tongue rough against my shaft and igniting a fire that gathered in my belly. It was too good, too much, and as much as the thought of Alec swallowing everything I gave him made me delirious with need, I needed more than this.
I pulled back, gripping his hair in my fist to keep him from following. The look in his eyes, the feral, lust-drunk expression, had me as close to coming as his mouth had. I’d never seen him look like that before, and I wasn’t ever going to forget it. I did this to him. I made him want me this much.
It was heady as fuck, and I felt like I possessed some sort of superhuman power over him. With more calm than I felt, I strode past him and climbed onto the bed, taking my position on hands and knees before looking back at him to see if he would follow.
He stripped and then he was right there, his cock jutting forward. The mattress dipped as he knelt behind me, and I shivered, anticipating what would happen next. The rough of Alec’s palms skidded across my heated skin, and I leaned into the touch, needing his hands on me, his mouth.
I didn’t have to wait long before I felt Alec’s hands move to my back, pushing my shoulders down against the mattress before he was spreading my ass open. I leaned toward him, lifting my ass higher in the air, silently begging. I was not disappointed. Alternating between tongue and fingers, he worked me open. Desire consumed me and all I could do was give myself to him, put all my trust in him, and let him do with me what he wanted.
I rocked on my knees, any fragments of self-consciousness annihilated with each swipe of Alec’s tongue. I panted with the effort it took not to come, my breath dampening the sheet beneath me, until Alec pulled back.
Cool air chilled my wet skin and I trembled, every nerve on alert, waiting for Alec to touch me again. When I felt his fingers curl around my hip, I exhaled a shuddering breath, and he pressed inside me.
It was slow, excruciatingly so, and the burn as he breached me was so satisfying. Knowing Alec was inside me had me eager for more. I tried to ignore the stretch as he filled me, and I pushed back, forcing him all the way in.
“Fuck, Chase…” Alec’s voice was strained, and even through the thick haze of desire, I recognized the edge of desperation there. My head swam with it. I’d never heard my name sound like that before, like a promise and a curse all at once.
Everything stopped, and for an instant, Alec and I were all that existed in the universe. All I could hear was our ragged breathing in the quiet room, everything else fading into the distance. My body swirled with pleasure, the core of it focused on that one spot where Alec and I were joined.
I closed my eyes and concentrated on it, memorizing the way I felt in that moment. Alec’s fingers tightening on my hips was the only warning I got before he started to move.
“Harder,” I managed to gasp, wanting him to bruise me. I wanted to wear his fingerprints, all of him etched into me as a physical reminder of what had happened between us.
He complied, tightening his grip even more and setting a brutal pace that knocked the air from my lungs and made my head spin. It was good, so good. I wanted to feel this tomorrow, a week from now, maybe forever.
This was Alec.
Alec.
And he was making me fly.
I felt him slide his arm around my belly, pulling me upright as he fucked me. I groaned and let my head fall back against his shoulder as he sucked hard at the curve of my shoulder, his arm banding across my chest and holding me to him.
The change in position altered the angle, and I melted against him as he moved. I was drowning in him, and everything in me screamed how much I needed to come. I reached for my cock, painfully neglected until now, but without faltering, Alec grabbed my wrist with a bruising grip and held me back.
“No. Not yet,” he growled.
“Please,” I begged, letting my head fall forward.
“Wait. Just wait. Chase. You gotta wait… Just a little longer. I promise…”
I didn’t know what he was promising, and I didn’t care. This was Alec and I trusted him with everything I had. I nodded, as well as I could, and moaned when he released my wrist and moved his hand. His thumb and fingers teased at my nipples, and I sobbed with pleasure at the sensation.
I could feel my orgasm building, hot and intense, but I needed more.
Alec pulled out, his hands letting me go, then grabbing hold again, flipping me over and pressing me into the mattress. He covered his body with mine, forcing my knees wider as he drove into me once more.
I closed my eyes, the intensity of the moment palpable and too much.
“Chase… look at me.” Alec’s tone was ragged, harsh, and he gripped the back of my head, tangling his fingers tightly in my hair.
I opened my eyes and as I did, he slid his hand between us, wrapping his fist around my cock. I cried out, the sudden influx of sensation sending me reeling.
“You gonna come for me?” he asked, the question more of a demand than anything. He stroked hard, the movement of his hand matching the timing of his thrusts with perfect pace.
“Oh God, Alec.” His name came out as more of a moan because in that moment I was falling apart, fragments of myself ricocheting in all directions as my orgasm took over. All I could see was him, and all I could hear were our uneven breaths as I came.
Alec held me tighter than ever, his breath dancing across my skin. In and out he moved, rough and with abandon until a moment later, with one last thrust, he buried himself as deep as he could and emptied himself into me.
I could feel the heat from his come spreading inside me, marking me as his. The intensity with which I felt the need to keep him close was overwhelming, and I buried my face against the side of his neck to keep from making eye contact. When Alec began to pull out, I tightened my legs around his back. I wasn’t ready.
I needed a minute—a minute to breathe, a minute to gather together all the pieces of myself I’d temporarily lost, a minute to wrap my head around the fact that the best sex I’d ever had was with my best friend.
Chapter Sixteen
Alec
I woke up to a pounding headache and a tight knot of dread in the center of my chest. The room was sweltering since I’d been too distracted to bother lowering the temperature the night before. The moment I opened my eyes, everything that happened slammed into me in a torrent of vivid memories. Even the excess of alcohol I had consumed hadn’t dimmed the memory of fucking my best friend.
I slipped from the bed, the sheets crumpled and come-stained. I heard Chase stir as he turned, the blankets slipping down as he moved to reveal the extent of the blotches and bruises I’d left on his pale skin.
I’d done that to him. With my mouth and with my hands, I’d marked him up.
My cock twitched against my thigh at the sight at the same moment my stomach rolled. I’d forced him to look at me while I fucked him, made him stare into my eyes so I could watch him fall apart as I pounded into him. I’d never felt so desperate for someone before, and so completely sated when it was all over.
Knowing how vocal he was, how rough he liked it, and how he responded when I rode him hard, made me feel the same way I had the first time I’d gotten drunk. In the moment I’d never felt better. It had consumed me and made me feel superhuman.
Being with Chase was the same, only this time I couldn’t take a Tylenol and sleep off the aftermath of my poor decisions. There was no coming back from this, no way to erase what we’d done.
I slunk from the room like a coward. I couldn’t risk the shower in case the sound of the water woke Chase up. I couldn’t face him. There was too much jumbled in my head, and I needed to collect my thoughts before I talked to him. Knowing he was sleeping in the next room made my chest hurt, but I found some clothes in the dryer and pulled them on as quickly as I could.
At the last second, I summoned enough courage to write Chase a note, then got the fuck out of my house.
The sun was too bright, and I squinted against it as I climbed into my truck. Distracting myself with work was the best option I could think of, and although all I wanted to do was climb back into bed and sleep for another thirty years, it wouldn’t hurt to make some progress on the projects we had going on at the shop.
By the time I pulled into my parking spot, I was seriously regretting my decision. The aching behind my eyes had gotten worse, and the thought of turning on the angle grinder made me want to die.
I trudged into my office and closed the door behind me, as though being confined in that small space would lessen the pressure at my temples. Reefing my desk drawer open, I spotted the bottle of aspirin. I shook out one and a half times the recommended dosage and swallowed them dry, hoping taking them on an empty stomach would mean they’d kick in faster.
Once I’d managed to force the pills down my throat, I stood, feeling a little more wobbly on my feet than I would have liked, and trudged over to the washroom adjacent to my office. I silently thanked myself for having the foresight to install a shower up there. Mostly I used it for rinsing off before meeting the guys at the bar. I’d never had to escape my own apartment before, but I was learning there were varied uses for an en suite to my office.
I turned the tap on and waited for the room to fill with steam as I undressed before I stepped under the spray. It was a little too hot, but I didn’t bother to adjust the temperature. It poured down on me and washed away Chase’s sweat, Chase’s come. I watched the scalding water swirling down the drain, the physical evidence of what I’d done swept away through the pipes with it.
I stayed in there until the water ran cold before I turned off the taps and grabbed a towel from the shelf. It was rough and too small to dry all of me, but I felt a million times better by the time I got dressed again.