Naked Love

by Jones, Lisa Renee

  “Nervous habit. I draw when I’m thinking.” She leaned against the railing of the restaurant patio, her bare arms tense as she looked out at the street. She rode with me to the restaurant. Jagger and Leah had yet to arrive.

  “I’d like to see what else you’ve got, when you’re not trying to be something you’re not,” I said. She confessed how uncomfortable she was in her new surroundings. It would be a damn shame to watch her morph into every other woman I knew. Hard and jaded.

  She let her mouth drop and pulled on that damn ponytail. If she only knew how much it turned me on. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?” she asked.

  I didn’t get a chance to answer. Leah tapped Shannon’s shoulder, pulled her into a hug, and rocked her back and forth like she hadn’t just seen her fifteen minutes ago. Shannon was taller, so Leah had to crane her neck around her shoulder to get in an obligatory glare at me.

  “How’s your night going?” Jag slapped my shoulder and grinned.

  “Kind of took a left turn at the front door of your gallery.”

  “She’s cool.” Jagger kept his voice low, though the ladies had gone up to the hostess station to get a table. “Leah loves her. Talks about her like she’s her secret weapon.”

  “This must be killing Leah,” I said. In her defense, I got our relationship off on the wrong foot by saying Jag was making the biggest mistake of his life. Even with the baby and the wedding, I wasn’t convinced I was wrong. He never wanted any of this until he met Leah. I asked him about it, and all he said with some dumb fuck dreamy smile was that I’d know when it happened to me. The problem with his theory was things like this didn’t happen to guys like me. I was a rented fantasy, rode hard and put away wet until the next customer came along.

  Jag laughed. “She’s not thrilled. Listen, it would make my life a lot easier if you two would get along.”

  “I know that.” As much as I didn’t want to lose Jag, it wouldn’t be easy to make it happen.

  Jagger glanced at the hostess stand and back to me. “Leah doesn’t want you at the wedding. But I do. It’s the most important day of my life, and I want the guy who’s been with me through thick and thin there. You’re the only person I’m asking to come. So play nice.”

  I didn’t have a chance to say anything before the hostess brought us to our table. But it meant a lot that Jagger stood up to Leah to invite me to the wedding. Maybe he didn’t hate me so much after all.

  Everyone but Leah ordered coffee. I wanted to say fuck it and order a vodka tonic and lime. It would dull the tension. But I couldn’t rely on vodka to solve my problems. It usually created new ones.

  The ladies talked about Claire, who’d been my client originally. One of my first. They were redesigning her house, and it didn’t surprise me Claire had some definite opinions. It took everything I had to not to tell them what Claire had taught me, which was pretty much everything I knew.

  “The wedding’s in six weeks,” Jag said after we ordered our food. “There’s not much to plan; we’re keeping it simple. Leah’s folks are coming down, along with her daughter.”

  “Kari’s coming, too,” Leah said to Shannon.

  Shit, another of my old clients. I rubbed my face, wondering if Leah knew her bestie had a go at Jag back in the day, too. Jag would kill me if I said anything, but Leah brought out the asshole in me. I pushed it down.

  “We want to rent some rooms in Islamorada the day before and celebrate Christmas there. Do either of you have plans that would interfere with that?” Leah asked.

  Shannon shook her head, and her face darkened. “I’m not going home this year.”

  “I’ll have to check the appointment book.” There was no home to go to on Christmas. Jag and I had been popular on holidays at the agency because we’d been the only two available to take clients.

  Leah rolled her eyes. “I’ll book you, if that’s what it takes to get you to your best friend’s wedding.”

  “That won’t be necessary.” Bitch. “I’ll be there.”

  “Good. And at some point, I’d like to talk to you without this guy listening in.” She nudged Jag. “I’ve got a couple surprises up my sleeve I might need your help with.”

  Didn’t expect that she’d trust me with any part of her wedding. Jag had asked me to stand up for him, and I’d be there. Even if I didn’t understand it, I wouldn’t take away his happiness.

  “Whatever you need,” I said. Leah was part of my life, whether I liked it or not. And if I wanted to keep Jag in it, I couldn’t let every word out of her mouth piss me off anymore.

  Her face lit up. “Thanks.”

  “What needs to be done?” Shannon asked. “I’m here, and I literally only know you guys, so use me wisely.”

  I dropped my napkin in my lap. My cock was ready to burst through my jeans.

  “You’re doing enough already,” Leah said. “Once the hotel rooms are booked, that’s it. I don’t want anything stuffy and formal. Wear whatever you want.”

  I nudged Shannon. “You better wear those sneakers.”

  She curled the corner of her mouth up in a smile. “I just might.”

  “Seriously, we don’t want anything too planned. That doesn’t work for any of us. Like Leah said, Shannon, you’ve done so much already. Tonight was amazing.” Jag lifted his coffee cup and clinked it against Shannon’s mug. “Did you see that line out the door?”

  “Some of us got stuck in it for a couple hours.” I side-eyed Shannon.

  “Good.” Leah laughed. “We’ve got to keep the riffraff out.”

  “Did I tell you what happened?” Jag slapped his hand on the table. “There’s a museum in Kansas City that wants to feature my stuff.”

  “Holy shit, man. That’s amazing.” Though I hadn’t been sure there was a market for Jag’s stuff, I was happy to be wrong. Tonight, I might be wrong about a lot of things. “When’s that gonna happen?”

  “Hopefully in a couple weeks.” He leaned back in his seat and ran his hand through his hair. “Getting married, baby on the way, my work in a fucking museum like I’m a real artist—if you told me this a year ago, I would’ve never believed you.”

  A year ago, he had just met Leah. He’d been burned out on escorting, but I thought he was in for a long haul. He was like me. Escorting wasn’t a bridge to something better. It was the something better. Leah beamed at him like the moon and the stars floated around him. Just for her. My muscles twinged. Not my dick—it was higher, a part of me I was much less familiar with. I looked over at Shannon, and she bit her lip.

  The kiss Jag and Leah shared wasn’t what made us uncomfortable. It was everything they had that we didn’t.

  6

  Shannon

  French toast was a horrible idea. It sat like a brick in my belly as we headed out to the boardwalk. Miami buzzed with activity, like the neon lights that illuminated the walk. Jagger and Leah held hands, and I didn’t know what to do about Zach.

  He was kind of irritating, but I was pretty sure he was putting up a giant wall. I could take a few lessons from him, instead of jumping in feet first to every idea that sailed through my head. I’d lost count of the times Leah and Jagger told me to cool it since I moved to Miami. That I was doing too much. I was trying way too hard to make things happen.

  But Zach was doing the same.

  Leah and Jagger trailed behind us, in their own little universe. Zach didn’t bitch that I walked too fast, which was a check in his plus column. I shouldn’t have given him columns. He was an escort, used to rich old women paying him for what they wanted. I didn’t have that kind of currency. It wasn’t about not being able to afford him; his job happened in a universe I had no invitation to.

  “Remember that smart remark you made about my sneakers?” I asked as we waited for the other two to catch up.

  “Yeah.” He grinned. “You gonna put them in the gallery?”

  “I have a whole collection of them.” They were in a box at Grandma’s house, like most of my stuff. I�
��d send for it when I found a permanent apartment. Maybe then Miami would start to feel like home. “But I’d like to see you when you let your guard down.”

  I wasn’t the only one trying to fit into a place I didn’t belong. Zach wanted to get into a party he wasn’t invited to. Things with him and Jagger were strained at best. He was holding onto a business that no longer existed. Change terrified him.

  He startled, like he couldn’t believe I saw through his bullshit façade. “What are you talking about?”

  Zach, in a weird way, was safe. The furthest thing from boyfriend material, so there was nothing to screw up by saying too much. “All you talk about is being an escort. And sex. There’s got to be more to you than that.”

  “You’re a workaholic, too,” he said. “Look around you, and not because you think it will make you better at your job. Drink it in. Let yourself enjoy it. The people passing by you? They worked their asses off at their miserable jobs so they could come here. We live in paradise.”

  He was right, and it stung. I was trying so hard not to repeat my past mistakes, I was making brand new ones. Putting work before everything else. “I know.”

  “Don’t worry about what everyone’s doing around you, Shannon. Do you. It got you this far.”

  “I can’t fail,” I said. Leah and Jagger were lost in each other, but they weren’t missing out. They’d found their own paradise. “Once I’m comfortable, I can relax.”

  Zach shook his head. “You’ll keep wanting more, and you’ll never be satisfied.” He reached for my hand, wiggling his when I didn’t take it right away. “Let me show you how to have a good time.”

  He didn’t wait for the other two to catch up before he pulled me away from the railing. The crowd parted for us.

  “What have you been dying to do since you got there?” he asked. The low timbre of his voice sent shivers down my spine. Good shivers. Everything he did oozed sensuality. His words could be split down the middle between the truth and double entendres. Every woman that passed by turned her head to drink in a sip of him.

  I wondered what it would be like to hire him for the night—to have him serve my every whim. Electricity shot through my veins as I thought of what I’d ask him to do to me. His hands and lips all over my body. If I’d ask him to restrain me, or something I never dared to ask anyone else for. I was pretty good at stepping outside my comfort zone, but even I had a limit.

  I had to get over that. He stirred a whirlwind of emotions inside me, and he stripped away my only defense. He wouldn’t let me make this about work. That had become my security blanket, and I didn’t know what to do without it. I had a feeling it was something Zach and I had in common.

  Leah and Jagger caught up to us.

  “Let’s go down to the water. I haven’t put my feet in the ocean yet.” I got a sunburn if I got too close to an open window, and I had yet to figure out my beach game during full daylight.

  “We’ll stay up here,” Jagger said.

  Away from the boardwalk, the beach got dark fast. “You should take your shoes off. Get some sand between your toes,” Zach said.

  I wobbled as I kicked off my sneakers. If I sat down in this dress, I’d get sand in some pretty uncomfortable places.

  Zach caught me before I fell flat on my ass. “Ready?”

  “For what?”

  “We’re going into the water.”

  “We are?” I pictured us walking along the edge of the tide and letting the waves lap against our feet. Like it was actually a date. But Zach was going to drag me away from my comfort zone, and from all the things that never worked for me in the first place.

  Zach grabbed my hand and started running. I shrieked. I had two choices—keep up or get dragged behind him. Water splashed my legs, under my skirt, and he didn’t stop until the water hit my waist.

  “I just wanted to get my feet wet!” I pushed his shoulders. His T-shirt was dark from the splashes.

  “What the fuck fun is that?” He dipped down, fully emerged himself, and shook water away from his hair when he came back to surface.

  “Leah and Jagger must think we’ve lost our minds.” They looked so small from here.

  “Who cares? Stop worrying about what everyone else thinks.” He took my chin in his wet hand. I braced myself for the kiss that didn’t come. His gray eyes reflected the full moon above us, which had given us our own spotlight, like we were the center of our universe. The moon had made a mistake.

  “Sometimes you’ve got to jump in the deep end,” Zach said.

  * * *

  My current wardrobe could only withstand these sympathy breakfasts for so long. I wanted to be a good friend and support Leah, as the baby dictated what she could and couldn’t eat, but last night’s food baby swelled my tummy. This morning—scratch that—afternoon, I had to stick to protein. And coffee. Lots and lots of coffee.

  “No more all-nighters for me.” Leah groaned as we sat down for brunch. “We wanted to give you two some space, but it looked like you had fun.”

  The last word came out sing song.

  She grinned at me from behind her juice glass “You’re blushing. It’s no secret that Zach isn’t my favorite person, but he’s Jagger’s best friend. He must have some redeeming qualities.”

  I laughed. “I think he’s got a few.”

  “That’s what I was afraid of. I don’t want to be a backseat driver, but you know what he does for a living. I’m not a hypocrite, either. When I met Jagger, he was still working, and it was hard. Had he not quit, I’m not sure I would’ve hung in there.”

  I was working with her when she met Jagger. It had been a rollercoaster for all of us at work, and the rest of the production company knew the boss was struggling. Leah and I bonded over it, because I was on the outs with my ex at the same time.

  “It was a night out.” I had to keep reminding myself that. “I’m not looking for a relationship.”

  “Mine was just a weekend.” Leah put her hand on her belly and smiled up at the waitress. “I’ll have the crab cake benedict.”

  “I’ll have the same.” I meant to order an omelet, but it slipped out. Leah owed me new pants, or maybe she’d give me her maternity clothes when she was done with them. “Your situation was totally different. I didn’t hire Zach. He’s not playing into what’s expected of him.”

  Leah raised her eyebrows as she looked down at her phone.

  Shit. “Sorry. That sounded way worse out loud than it did in my head.”

  She gave me a tight-lipped smile that looked more like a grimace. “I know what you mean. But that’s the problem. I paid Jagger to play into my fantasy. Last night, there were some serious sparks flying between the two of you.”

  I was caught in the worst place possible—the chasm between what I wanted and what I thought I should do. The only place to go was down. “I wouldn’t be so sure about that. He’s focused on starting the new agency.”

  “It’s going to be a lot harder for him to walk away from it if things between the two of you get involved.” Leah was in that drunken phase of love where she wanted everyone to feel the same way she did.

  “It was one night out. At Jagger’s suggestion,” I reminded her. We didn’t even kiss at the end of it. We exchanged information so we could work on the business.

  But I wished he’d kissed me. To see if I could get him out of my system or to give me a reason to keep thinking about him.

  “He’ll be at the wedding. And you know what happens at weddings.” She wiggled her eyebrows.

  I laughed. “Please, I’m the nerdy bridesmaid, not the horny one. Last night looked more serious than it was. He wants me to help him with his marketing, same way I did for Jagger.”

  “You did an amazing job. He’s still pinching himself over the museum people.”

  “I was so psyched when they said they were interested in his stuff.” I bounced in my chair and coffee dribbled down my chin. No need to hide my awkwardness from Leah.

  If she noticed,
she didn’t say anything, but the way she gaped at me, I was willing to bet she didn’t. “You set that up?” she asked.

  “Yeah. It started as looking for some people in the industry that would say nice things about his work on the website. I wanted a couple quotes, but I fell down a research rabbit hole, and I found that museum. They listed upcoming exhibits, and on a whim, I asked them if they had room or interest in Jagger’s work.” And they loved it. “It was torture to keep it a secret.”

  “Did he tell you about the lady from the coffee shop? She wants to commission… Wait a minute. You were behind that, too, weren’t you?” Leah was glowing. She never would’ve been able to stay away from Jagger, even if he kept escorting. She tried it a couple times, and she was in misery without him.

  Even though I worked with Leah since I graduated from college, it had been for the production company. I’d been restricted by the limits of my job description, and I couldn’t showcase what I was able to do. It frustrated the hell out of me, having to hold back. It made spreading my wings feel like showing off. But I was also aware that I was upping the ante for myself. She’d expect me to deliver bigger and better next month. “Guilty. Jagger had shown me the photos from that town, and on a whim, I searched it, and her blog came up. So I invited her.”

  “You’re a genius.” Leah whistled low as our food arrived. She took a bite and closed her eyes to savor it. That was what Zach was talking about last night. Living in the moment. I’d spent a lot of moments thinking about him since we said goodnight. Too many. “I can’t wait to see what you’ll do for us. I’m wondering if I’m not using you right. If I should look for another designer and have you work strictly on marketing. But you’re good at design, too. Why do you have to be so good at everything? Knock it off.”

  This was why I followed Leah fifteen hundred miles away from the security of working at a major television network. I could count on one hand how many times someone had uttered the phrase thank you in my direction since she was forced out of her job, and even fewer if it wasn’t related to bringing them their coffee.